Red, White & Blue | Bucky x Reader

Chapter Twenty-Two

When I regain consciousness, I'm on a table, and the bright lights shine in my eyes as a man stands above me.

"No!" I scream, lashing out at him as I try to get away. Strong hands grab my limbs, holding me down as another pair cup my face.

"Y/n, you're safe!" Bucky soothes, putting his forehead against my own so I can only see him. "You're safe. They're trying to help you."

My panic turns into sobs and I grab Bucky's wrists as the doctor and nurses continue their work.

Hours later, I lay awake in one of the hospital beds, my torso wrapped in gauze, as my three former bunkmates come to update me on my condition. At my side, Bucky's expression grim as he holds my hand, skillfully avoiding my gaze.

"You were extremely lucky," Marie informs me. "The debris went straight through you and missed everything important."

"How do you feel?" Evelyn asks.

"I'm okay, I guess," I reply, grunting as I sit up. "A little sore."

"They can give you something for the pain when you get to the other hospital," Georgia explains.

"The other hospital?" I ask.

My three friends share a look, but it's Bucky who answers, "They're evacuating you back to London, and from there they will probably send you home."

"What? No," I argue. "I'm staying with you."

"Can you give us a minute?" Bucky asks the nurses, and they nod, offering me a few small smiles before exiting the tent. Bucky turns back to me. "Y/n, don't make this any harder than it already is. You're going home."

"No, I'm not," I state firmly.

"You almost died!" Bucky yells, dropping my hand and standing from his chair.

"I know that!" I yell back. "But I didn't! I'm staying!"

"You were never supposed to follow us into war!"

"So, what? You and Steve can risk your lives, but I can't? I'm just supposed to sit around waiting to hear that you two died?! Fuck that!"

"Well, I can't watch you die!" Bucky shouts, his voice breaking. He lowers his voice as he continues, "You were dying in my arms, Y/n. Please, just go home, where I know that you'll be safe. I can't lose you."

I take his face in my palms as he sits back down. "And I can't lose you. I can't go home knowing that you'll still be here. I need to be here, with you, so you better get used to it, James Barnes, 'cause I'm with you till the end of the line."

"You're so stubborn," Bucky breathes before leaning forward to kiss me, a single tear sliding down his cheek.

"We'll make it through this war," I tell him. "And we'll do it together."

The Howling Commandos welcome me back with cheers, and my bunkmates join us for dinner. By some miraculous twist of fate, they ended up in this camp after leaving Italy, and there is no one else I would've trusted more with my care. They're happy to see me recovering, both from the injury and from the torture I endured, and I tell them that I'm happy to be with the Commandos, finding somewhere else to belong.

It's nice to see them again, but soon enough it's time to go, and the Commandos board Stark's plane to fly back to Headquarters. Although Bucky hates my decision to stay, he doesn't try to send me home again, and I soon become a valued member of the team as we continue with our missions.

One night after dinner, I sit on the grass between Bucky's legs, leaning into him as he wraps his arms around me.

"Bucky?" I ask as I gaze at the night sky, watching the stars. "Do you ever think about what our lives would be like if this war never happened?"

He rests his chin on my head as he thinks. "Honestly, no. If this war didn't happen, I might not have ended up with you." I look up at him and he leans down to kiss me before continuing. "A lot of bad stuff has happened since we got here, and some of it I wish never happened at all... but if one good thing came out of this war, it had to be you."

I smile at him. "And after the war? Once this is all over, what then?"

He tilts his head to the side, thinking once more. "I want to build a future with you. I want to get you a house and grow old together."

My smile grows as tears flood from my eyes. "I want that too."

He returns my smile and kisses me once more, keeping me wrapped in his arms as we sleep.

"Care to do the honours?" Steve asks, passing me the detonator.

"With pleasure," I reply as I take it from him and press the button.

The bomb explodes from deep inside the factory, taking the last known HYDRA base with it. It's been a year since the Howling Commandos were formed and we started our mission, and although I can't change what HYDRA did to me, and I'll have to live with it for the rest of my life, I can't help but feel a sense of justice as I watch the factory fall to pieces in front of us. Dugan lets out his trademark howl and the rest of us follow suit, celebrating that our mission is almost complete.