The Lovato World Tour (Lesbian Story)

I'm Not Leaving Again

The doctors said she overdosed on my medication. She wanted to die. She killed herself. My baby girl. My Hope. She was gone. My little girl was gone. The kids were at their grandparents. I couldn't get out of this trance. I felt like I was the sick one. The pain was unbearable. I can't breath. I cant do this without her.

I laid on her bed now. Wilmer was down the hall on the phone talking to someone. I took the pillow on the left side and clutched it to my body as I cried. That's when I opened my eyes and saw them. The envelopes.

I reached for one desperately it read mom.

'Mom,I'm sorry. I can't even begin to comprehend your feelings right now. I know you're hurting. I'm gone. I know. But please don't hurt for too  long. I'm happy mom. I promise I am happy. this is what I want. I couldn't stand to wait for death to come. I knew I was getting worse. I was going to die I know. so I wanted to take control over that I didn't want the cancer to take me. I needed to take control over my life and if I didn't have a choice in how I chose to live it I sure as hell was gonna choose death and why I chose to die loved. In the arms of the two people who brought me here. The people who mean the most to me. My mom and dad. I love you. I'll always love you. I'll always watch over you. I'd happy mom I promise now I need you to be happy. I'll always be here. I'll always be your nightingale. Lots of love, Hope. please don't mope around. I've done enough of that in the last few months for everyone. Grieve but keep going. Stay Strong'

Ps please give Migule and Regan their letters when you feel they're ready.'

A loud whale came from my mouth as I clutched the letter to my chest. I cried and cried and cried until I couldnt. I know it might take longer than a couple of hours but that letter was comforting.

I took the rest of the letters and headed to my bedroom where my husband sat.

He sat on the edge of our bed his head in his hands. I climbed behind him letting my legs drape at his side. I kissed his shoulder and he broke down. "I know it hurts" I whispered "you think that knowing she was going to go would have prepared us but it didnt" I rubbed his arms up and down.

"I found these" I took out his letter and handed it to him "under her pillow, she wrote them for us"

"I want to go give these to the kids" I stood up "will you be OK?" I asked quietly.

"Yeah go" he whispered looking down at his letter.

"I love you Wilmer." I kissed his forehead.

_________________________

"Mom" Faith said surprised as she opened the door of my parents house.

"Hi" I wrapped her up in my arms and kissed her.