Mcyt angst

Watched

I see how techno likes to control me, he manipulates me to feeling as though everything's my fault, every war, every fire, every twig that bloody snaps is always my fault, its like he's a hawk watching my every move. If I put one foot out of line he would swoop me up and take me away to exile just like before, obviously tubbo was the one to put me there last time but he had ordered technoblade to keep an eye on me and make sure I hadn't ran away. I had this pressure to suddenly become a simple guy, I mean all I have to do around this place was harvest crops and organise my chests because if I even thought about picking up a sword it would be taken from me. I couldn't even Begin to tell you the amount of times technoblade has taken my weapons, he still thinks I'm capable of starting another war. I've lost everything including my friends, there wouldn't be a war without people and without people I was nothing. I had no power, no youth and no strength after all I spent years withering away in logstedshire that my body just gave up. I've spend more of my life alone than with people who care about me. And now that I'm free I still feel trapped no matter how hard I try to reach out to people, they don't seem to notice or even care.
He's seen as the enemy, the one to be feared but what he didn't realise was that just as much as he watched me I could watch him too. All the time he was watching me I watched him back...
Every hour he spent rambling to himself thinking he was out of earshot I picked up information even dream would kill to get, I mean technoblade was undefeatable but yet I knew almost every detail that I could twist and make into something even he couldn't get out of, he could even be blamed for something for once and not let me take the fall as usual and his anarchy skills wouldn't be a match for the truth for once in our life.
From battle tips and tricks to the books he reads before he goes to sleep at night, the technoblade had become an open book to me and me only. I just have to learn how to use it to my advantage and prove for once and for all I was actually a person to be respected.