STARS - Sapnap

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"Sap? Are you in here bub?" My voice was hoarse as I had been woken from my sleep, a text saying that someone was in need of my love.

I stepped through his unlocked bedroom door, thankful for past Nick giving me a spare key to the house. The wind blew the curtain softly, sending the breeze through the room. The soft glow of the room illuminated the silhouette sitting on the balcony.

"Sappy? What's going on, are you ok bub?" He sighed, his gaze staying on the soft light of the stars in front of him, the cold Texas night allowing me to see both Nicks and my own breath.

"Look at the stars, the sky, lights, life." A sob caught in the back of the fluffy haired boy's throat, making my eyes snap towards him.

The glow of the moon that once illuminated the silhouette of the boy, now outlining the the tear stained cheeks, pink almost red nose, blood shot eyes and the quivering bottom lip.

"Nick..." My voice was soft and quiet. Wrapping my arms around the shaking body, rubbing soothing circles in his skin. Such a small young boy didn't deserve so much pain in his life.

"I'm falling d-down this hole of... darkness a-and I don't wa-ant t-t-to..." Sobs racking over his body, his legs tucking into the tight, protective arms that were wrapped around him.

"We need to get inside before you get sick baby, come on." I pulled Nick up as I stood, he continued to sob into my shoulder mumbling apologies about waking me and how he was dirtying my shirt.

"I really didn't mean to wa-"

"Shh, Nick it's ok. You needed me, so I'm here." I watched as his whole heart shattered in his eyes. I watched as the boy finally surrendered to the inner battle that he had been fighting.

"It hurts, Please make it stop y/n/n! I want to to stop, I can't do it." My grip tightened onto his limp limbs. My mind wondering to what had finally forced the boy to crack.

"I know it hurts so much baby, so so much. But you're going to get through this, you're going to be the strongest person around. I know it hurts, but you have to keep fighting bubba." His sobs slowly turned into loud huffs for air, calming down with his head buried in my shoulder.

" 'm sleepy." I nodded as I pulled him to his bed, laying him down gently.

"Get some rest Sappy, you need to sleep." Once I felt him finally fall asleep, felt his breathing even out, eyes drop completely and his body relax on mine; I continued to text Nicks closest friend, Clay.

Clay had been just as oblivious to Nicks internal battle as the rest of us had been. Clay had promised me he'd fly out soon to see the younger boy.

Feeling sleep soon cast it's way into my head as my fingers dragged through the soft brown curls on Nicks head. Letting my hand fall and a smile stay on my lips as I slept.

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