11 Letters (One Direction)(Larry Stylinson)

Week 4 (Niall)

I think we are all trying to get better now Harry. It’s pretty much sunken in for the most part, and even though we still all miss you deeply, we have to move on with life. We cant stay in the past, and even though we’re all gonna be different from witnessing losing a loved one, we have to move on.

I cant say Louis is finding it as easy as the rest of us though.

I mean, Zayn has finally left his flat, everyday this week actually, and Liam has been getting back to his old levelheaded self. I’ve started laying back a bit and trying to go back to my old carefree self, and then there’s Louis.

Louis is still pretty bad. All of us lads the other day walked in on him when he claimed to be talking to you Haz. He claimed you were sitting on the beanbag right next to him but vanished once you heard our voices.

If it really was you Harry, which I doubt it was, but either way, why would you leave from hearing our voices? Don’t you want to see us?

I’ve also found out that Louis has been hiding your suicide note from us. We tried getting him to show us the note, or even to tell us what you wrote, but he wont tell us what it says. I say we’ll get it out of him eventually.

Liam is a tad pissed he wont show us the letter though. He told me he figured Louis had the note since the beginning, but Liam says that since we’re all best mates and what should be able to trust each other, why didn’t Louis trust us to show us the letter? I mean, I understand where Liam is coming from, but he has to be considerate of Lou. He’s been taking this pretty hard and he’s trying to distance himself, that doesn’t mean try and pry him open when all you’re really going to do is make him break more.

Back to the whole ‘you were talking with him’ thing. Ever since that night, all three of us lads have been crashing in your’s and Lou’s flat, keeping a close eye on him. He wont really talk to us much, and he especially wont bring up you in any circumstances. I think he’s trying to lock that part of him away. Ya know, the part that misses you and sees you and just wants to be with you. I think he’s trying real hard to get back to even a small fragment of his former self, but it’s barley working. All he’s doing is splitting his personalities, and that can just make him worse in the long run.

I still wish that we could jus wake up from this nightmare we have to call reality.

~Niall