Picking up the Pieces

13

She coded twice. Richard wanted Addison out of the OR twice. But Addison stayed. She knew she was the babies last chance, no one else could keep them alive while Meredith was coding, because even with tears still streaming down her face (she didn't even know she had that many tears) she was still the best.

After the excruciatingly long surgery they wheeled her back into the ICU.

Mark came to Addison who looked like she hadn't slept in a week (which she probably really hadn't).

"I took something out of the cave"

"What did you take?"

Mark showed her a small camera.

"Oh god he recorded it?"

"He did."

"I need to watch it"

"Are you sure?"

"I need to"

In the next five minutes word of it got out to Bailey, Alex, Cristina, Callie and Kathleen.

"Kath you shouldn't see that"

"He is my brother Mark, i can't believe it before i can see it with my own eyes."

Mark just nodded and they went into the conference room, popping the camera into the adapter of the television.

Neither of them was prepared to what they would see next.

They skipped through the tape to the last day, seeing Derek punching her, hitting her with his belt (now Addison knew how the bloody streaks on Merediths skin happened that she saw while doing the rape kit), kicking her in the ribs and raping her.

The women sat there crying, Mark and Alex were looking for something to punch.

Kathleen had gone completely quiet, knowing that she couldn't defend her brother anymore, not that she even wanted anymore.

When the part came that Meredith fell down the stairs Addison didn't even flinch anymore. Her whole head was empty, her only question was, why did Meredith never shield her belly from Derek. She turned around a bit so his kicking wasn't hitting her belly but she never shielded it with her arms. Only when she fell down.

But these thoughts weren't for long in Addisons head. All she could think about was how Meredith was still in a coma and that she didn't know for how long.

Christina was sobbing. She didn't know what her person was going through. She didn't know. They were together day in and day out (at least before Addison got close with her) and she did never know. She didn't even know if that was the first time something like this happened to her best friend, but when she looked how she took the beating and the rape... Christina just knew that it couldn't have been the first time.

As soon as they saw Alex coming down the stairs in the video Addison closed the video. She couldn't see it anymore. The last 45 minutes of skipping through the video were enough for her. She was nauseous and green around her nose.

"Mark could you please bring this video to the FBI? I have to throw up"

"Yeah i will. Go Addie"

Addison ran out to the bathroom while Christina looked after her, just like Izzie and George, who came into the room fifteen minutes prior.

"What is wrong with her?"

"Shut up", Callie just said.

"What?"

"Shut up, please. You have no idea what she is going through right now"

"Not more than we are", Izzie said

"You have no idea", Mark said while shaking his head.

Addison went back to the ICU, looked over the CTG and sat down next to Meredith.

She took the interns hand into hers, her fingers feeling the bloody cuts in her wrist, made by the strings Derek had wrapped around her wrists and feet.

Addisons fingers traveled higher over her arm, over her almost blue skin, blue from bruises, who covered more of her body then her normal skin.

And just as Addison thought she didn't have more tears left, they started cascading down her face again.