passports (hlvrai x reader)

chapter fourteen.

a/n: V SHORT/PRETTY SAD CHAPTER, HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY HJDFSYTGV

====TW: ANGST, DEREALIZATION, (KINDA?) INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS====

words: 1600

(y/n)'s pov.

...

i couldn't fall asleep.

sleep was short-lived for me, waking up presumably not long after i drifted to sleep in benrey's arms. his arms were wrapped around me as he kept me close, his breathing slow. i felt warm, really warm-

but not.. safe.

i couldn't quite tell what irked me, whether it was benrey himself or the 'new known knowledge' dawning upon me again. it all felt so uncanny, something felt so unnerving.

the feeling was strong enough to make me slowly peel away from benrey's sleeping form, taking my lab coat and swiftly slipping my arms into the sleeves as i backed away from the rest of the group to not accidentally wake them up. i quietly made my way down the stairs into the wikipedia room, then outside near where bubby and i launched.

i could tell my hair was a bit ruffled up but i didn't care enough to fix it as i stared knowingly at the bright 'stars'.

i looked down at the palms of my hands, softly placing one on the other and acknowledging the textures. the warmth , the small indents in my hands, the tips of my fingers... it was all there.

but it wasn't real.

i felt my eyebrow tense for a moment as i remembered my pockets. i felt a sort of mental 'click' in my head when i realized why my pockets could fit anything i put into it with no problem, and if anything made me question if there was some kind of limit to them. there was no weight from all of the things i carried, no sign of anything being in my pockets from the outside. it made me feel like maybe i should've known what i do sooner.

'i had to be the one that put me in this place,' i think to myself, 'so how the fuck do i leave?'

"leave," i mutter in hopes of temporarily getting out of here.

nothing happened.

"...exit?"

nothing.

"pause,"

nope.

"pause... pause game,"

....

a big grey rectangle appeared before my eyes and my surroundings became a shade of grey as well. my eyes slightly widened in surprise at this as i continued to find a way out of the game. i read the different buttons.

'resume', 'options'.. and 'leave game'.

i hesitantly brought my hand closer to the last button, barely feeling my fingertips press it as my vision went black.

then i was able to take my headset off.

i looked at it with perplexity, staring at it as i held the index in front of me, the controllers hanging off of my wrists from the straps. i looked down at my wood floor and realized that was the weird experience i had the prior night, my headset must've slipped off once i slept in-game.

i looked around the room i was in, my bedroom. it was dimly lit, clutters off mess around the spacious room i hand in my decently sized apartment. i turned over to my desk, seeing the average RGB setup i had with a few cups cluttering the space.