5 Leagues Above ➸ Larry Stylinson

Chapter 29

[Louis POV]

"You're really okay with this, Haz? I don't want to pressure you if you aren't ready."

I'd picked up Harry from his house and we're driving back to mine as I explain the plan. I want to come out to my mom, but if Harry's not ready I'm obviously not going to make him go through with this.

"Boo, I promise I'm alright. Practically everyone knows I'm gay, besides my mum. So of course, I'll help you come out to your parents."

"About that," My voice hitches in my throat.

"About what?" He looks at me with a puzzled face.

"My parents. I'm only coming out to my mom."

He looks puzzled for a second but quickly shrugs it off. I make a note to tell him about what had happened with my dad later, so this whole coming-out-to-only-one-parent thing will be less confusing.

"Sounds like a plan. Maybe sometime I'll finally have the guts to come out to my mom after all these years. I want you there with me when I do too, please."

I turn to face the curly boy in the passenger seat and give him a quick kiss (we're at a stop sign so it's safe).

"Of course I'll be there," I whisper and he smiles, his pearly whites flashing.

"Does she expect you to come back with me when you said you wanted her to meet someone?"

"Not exactly. I didn't say that I was coming back with anyone I was dating, I just left the 'someone' up to imagination. She probably assumes it's my imaginary girlfriend because I made up a little story when I was talking with her about me having a girlfriend when I got nervous at the burger joint. But after that, I've never referred to having a girlfriend specifically,"

"So what makes you want to come out? I'm so proud of you for doing it, and I'm also surprised you've warmed up to the idea so quickly."

"It's simple really. While I was talking to her and trying hard not to use male pronouns and to cover up our little secret, I just hated having to hide what we have. I don't want to have to hide like this I want to be open and loving. But at the same time, I don't know how other people will react or how they'll treat me after that and-" I started to ramble, but Harry puts a hand on my leg and stops me.

"Louis, I know I'm one to talk but I've thought about coming out to my mom for a very long time, so hear me out."

He takes a deep breath as if he's gathering his thoughts. I can feel the nervous feeling building in my stomach as we get closer to my house as I think about what's to come.

"The unknown is scary. The possibility of rejection from people we love and care about is one of my biggest fears, so I understand exactly how you're feeling. Love will always conquer that fear; if they love and care about you then they'll accept you. Who you love shouldn't and doesn't determine your self-worth. And in the case that they don't accept you're coming out, take a deep breath and ask yourself if you're happy that you can finally be open. That you no longer have to feel trapped by the fear of that scary, scary unknown. The way I see it is if you find the right person who has the ability to give you confidence and who can lift you up when you're feeling down, then who cares what other people say? There comes a time that you need to consider doing things to make yourself happy instead of going around and trying to please other people's expectations. Do this for you, not for them, and do it with confidence. I'll be right here with you no matter what she says, I promise."

At this point, we're pulling into my driveway and I'm trying hard to keep my tears from falling. "I've never thought about it like that, Haz, so thank you. I don't want to cry, but that's probably the best advice I've ever gotten. I wish I had something better to say but I can't top that."