Imprisoned Love

Chapter 22

It was a weekend before I even knew it. Saturday was spent pretty much with a horizontal position on my couch, as I watched movie after movie until I began to feel tired enough to turn the TV off. It might have been because of the rain which was pouring its soul outside that I found no will to do anything productive. Not that I had anything to complain about, anyway.

That scenario changed once the Sunday came and the sun awoke in the morning. It made me feel bad for staying inside my four walls so I used the day to take a walk with my friend Victoria through the town. Later on, we met with the other two, Rachel and Kelsy, in the coffee bar afterward. After a long chat, it seems like Victoria finally found herself a man or, at least, someone she's been frequently talking to and hanging out with. I felt elated hearing it and she promised all of us to bring him over one day so we can meet him.

I was thinking about visiting Lorie but decided to go back to my apartment instead. She might not even be home, seeing how her little daughter has dance competitions every once in a while. I made a mental reminder to reach out to her later in the evening.

Once I exited the elevator in my building, I came face to face with a man who was sitting on the stairs near the door of my apartment. I was bewildered at first but it didn't take me that long to realize who was he. And it took every ounce in my body not to cry and scream at the same time.

''Dad.'' I breathed out, as I held the cold silver keys in my right hand. He stood up once he recognized my face and managed to stretch out his lips in a thin smile. To say that he looked like a disaster was understandable. I wasn't even able to recall the last time he looked like a decent human being. My own father, my own blood, looked like he was desperate for some shaving and a new pair of clean and fresh clothes. I could only imagine what the life he lives does to him.

''Hey, sweetheart. Wow, I don't think I'll ever get used to you being all grown up.'' He took two steps towards me, slightly trudging. I almost winced at the sight in front of me but remained emotionless. It was the best that he could get from me at the moment, ''You look amazing.''

''Look, dad, I know why you're here but I wish I had the money myself. I have bills to pay for this month so you'll have to ask someone else.''

I walked past him, as if he wasn't even standing there for god knows how long, waiting for me to rescue him from whatever debt he owes or for whichever drink he had in mind for tonight. I had been helping him so many times before but, in the end, he showed that the help is the last thing he wanted from me. All he ever asked for was a material value. It was always that stupid money. Even with all of the warning bells from my auntie and my closest friends, I went deaf and did everything he needed me for anyway. Thinking that somehow, in the end, I will get my father back. Thinking that he will ultimately realize where he went wrong and show me the love that I consistently craved for. All he left me with, though, was a huge disappointment. And a life lesson that he cannot be trusted.

''Oh, sweetie, I'm not here to ask you for the money. What kind of father would I be?''

I opened the door of my apartment and turned to him. My brow arched, as if asking him was he being serious with his question or not. 

''The kind of father that you've always been. I know you. You don't come to me unless you need something. So, what is it?''

I could see his hands shaking. I doubted it was because of the edginess from seeing me. It was probably from all of the alcohol he was lacking in his organism. 

''I just wanted to see how you've been doing. I haven't seen you in so long...''

''And whose fault is that?'' I asked angrily. I rarely snapped at people but I could never be kind to my dad. Whenever I saw him, my blood would instantly boil. He was bringing the worst out of me and he was very well aware of the fact. Which is also why he hadn't already left yet. It was a trait of his - persistence. Being persistent until I let him in again.