"I don't look at you like that."
"Yeah, right." I scoff. "I don't want to catch anything from you! Don't talk to me, don't breathe next to me and we'll be fine!" I mimic him.
"Well..." He trails off.
"I'm not a disease, you know." I say quietly, and he goes silent.
"Okay. I did say those things. But that's just because I was upset I had to sit next to you." He says awkwardly and I roll my eyes.
"Gee, thanks." I mumble and I see him stuff his hands in his pockets out of the corner of my eye.
"I didn't mean it like that. It's just because I'm always sitting next to my best friend and so-"
"Goodbye." I cut him off, seeing that we're approaching my house already. I quickly rush off, not giving him the chance to say anything more.
I don't want to talk to him anymore, I hope we don't talk for another week like last time.
That was my last thought yesterday before I ran from Tsukishima. Thankfully, I didn't go to school today since I didn't want to die. I won't possibly talk to him until tomorrow, but hopefully never.
I look at the time and see it's 7:30 pm. It's time for my third shower. I quickly walk to the bathroom, jumping into the shower.
Ding dong
I hear, 15 minutes into it. I frown, continuing to wash the conditioner out my hair. It couldn't be my parents, they don't get off until a bit later. Plus, they have a key. I soap my body and begin to hear taps on my window.
What the hell?
I quickly rinse off, putting on clothes before wrapping my wet hair in a towel and slowly approaching my window. A small pebble suddenly hits it and I flinch. I look through it and make eye contact with the culprit.
I open the window, peeking my head through and staring down at the tall blonde below me.
"Dude, I've been waiting so long. Open the door." He groans and I lock my eyes on to the windowsill.
"Did you need something?" I ask, not wanting him to come into my house.
"What? I can't hear you?" He frowns, putting a hand around his ear.
"What did you need?" I ask a little louder.
"Fuck, Debu! I can't hear shit you're saying." He groans. "But I brought the work you missed today. Geez, open the damn door." He demands.
Frowning, I close my window and quickly brush my hair first before going downstairs. I open the door just slightly, peeking down at his shoes.
"I'm coming in." He says, pushing the door wider and walking in, even slipping his shoes off.
"Y-You don't have to c-come in." I say quietly, but close the door. "What did you say you came here for today?"
"The work you missed. Our teacher asked me to bring it to you." He sighs, and I put some distance between us.
Yesterday, I stayed after school to finish the work for the next couple of days. Sensei knows this, so there's no way she sent him. Or maybe she forgot about that? No...I don't think so.
"Your face looks pretty bad." He comments, and I turn away from him, not saying anything.
Maybe I shouldn't turn away from him. Maybe that's what he's waiting for, and then he'll hit me over the head with a bat or something. I quickly turn around, but it's too late. Tsukishima is right in front of me now. He raises a hand and I quickly grab his wrists, closing my eyes.
"Please don't hit me! Don't kill me." I say and he's quiet for a moment.
"You know, you're really starting to get on my nerves. You're so annoying. Don't hit you? Don't kill you? Why the hell would I waste that much energy on you? Let go of me." He demands.
"No! You're going to hit me, I'm sure of it." I peek one eye open and look up at him. His expression makes my eyes widen, and my grip on his wrist to loosen.
It's not disgust in his eyes. Not at all actually. It's...nothing? His face is blank. He stares at me for a second as well, before he pulls his hand away.
He extends it once again and brushes a finger over one of my cuts, making me wince.
"Did that hurt?" He asks, his face unchanging as I nod.
"A little bit." I admit and retracts his hand.
"Then I won't do it again. Have you been icing your eye? It doesn't look that good either."
"No..." I feel like an elementary school girl getting scolded.
"That's why you're an idiot." He mumbles. "Come on. Let's ice it." He says, walking to my kitchen.
I stare at his back once again, wondering why the hell he's here. Why is he checking on me? Why aren't we friends, nor will we ever be?
I follow him into my kitchen, and I see him going through multiple drawers.
"Do you have little baggies- oh I found them. Sit down right there." He points to the island and I take a seat on the stool.
I watch as he fills the bag with ice, and wraps it in paper towels before making his way over to me.
"It's not good to put ice directly on to your skin, here. Do you have aloe?" He asks and I shake my head, taking the ice and gently pressing it to my eye.
"You looked at me twice today." He notes, making me glue my eyes to his shoes.
"Cool." I say quietly, and he sighs.
"Debu, look at me right now." He says and I shake my head. "Fucking pathetic." He mutters, but I can hear him.
Why does he come here? Why does he try to help, but be mean the entire time? There's some reason why he keeps coming, but I have no idea what it is. He hates me. It must be something bad.
"Maybe you should go home now." I say quietly, and I see him take a few more steps closer to me.
"Don't want me here?" He questions, and I gulp. Is he angry? Maybe I should have just been quiet.
"W-Whatever you keep coming over here to do, just do it. P-Please just get it over with. I can't stand just sitting here, waiting for it to happen. I won't tell anyone, I promise." I set the ice down on the counter and look down.
"You sure?" He asks, and that confirms my suspicions. He is here for something, and I know it's not good.
"Y-Yes, just hit me already." I say, feeling tears start to burn my eyes already.
"Look at me. I won't ask you again." His voice is cold, and when I follow his orders, his face is hard. I can feel my chest tightening, and I try to take a deep breath. "When this is over, remember that you're the one who begged for it."
I just nod my head, keeping eye contact with him as he stands just mere inches from me. I don't want to look at him, I don't want to know the moment he'll hit me. So I close my eyes.
A second passes, then 10, then 20... it's already past a minute. What is he waiting for?
I flinch, feeling his hand on my face. But he didn't hit me, he's cupping my cheek? A second later I feel something on my lips. His other fingers? What is he-
Oh. 'Remember that you're the one who begged for it' runs through my head. I didn't beg for this! I thought he was going to hit me and I just wanted to get it over with.
But he's kissing me? Tsukishima Kei... he's kissing me. He really isn't disgusted by me?
"You're a terrible kisser." He says, pulling away.
Oops, I was too busy panicking that I didn't kiss him back.
"Since... since your eyes are still closed, I'll do it again." He says quietly, and then his lips are on mine for a second time.
I reach shaky hands up and place them on his shoulders, kissing him back this time.
He doesn't hate me, he's not disgusted by me. I'm so happy! Why do I feel this way? He's still mean. But at least he doesn't hit me. Do I like him? Have I liked him this whole time? I'm so busy mulling over this question that I didn't even notice he had pulled away.
"Debu, hello?" He calls my name and my eyes shoot open. I cover my mouth with my hands and stare at him in shock, my face burning red.
"Y-Y-You!" I can't get the words out.
"Don't act like that, you told me to!" He says, suddenly defensive. His cheeks turn a red color like mine and he looks away from me.
"I-I said to do what you've been coming here to do! You've been coming here to kiss me?!" I exclaim, and his cheeks turn even more red.
"No! I've just come to check on you! W-When you said that... it was the first thing that came into mind s-so I just did it! Stop making it awkward." He looks back towards me and I take a deep breath.
"But then you did it again!" I blink and he sighs.
"Debu, was this your first kiss?" He asks wearily and I nod.
"Of course it was! And you stole it from me! My second one too." I cross my arms, and at that he looks at me in amusement.
"You didn't oppose to the second one though, so that must mean you liked it." He says and I scoff.
"What about you?! You initiated the second one, so you must have liked it." I look away from him.
I feel...comfortable. Like I can do or say whatever I want to him. Maybe it's not such a bad idea to have him come over.
"Negative. I kissed you a second time because you sat there like a dead fish the first time." He crosses his arms, and I let mine fall to my sides. "Look, Debu. Don't get the wrong idea, this doesn't mean I like you or anything. I don't know why I did it, or even why I keep coming here. But I don't like you, I just simply don't hate you." His tone is serious, but I'm still feeling that happy feeling from earlier.
"Then, I'd like you to simply not hate me some more." I say without thinking, and then I facepalm myself when I realize my words. "Wait, I didn't-"
But he cuts me off with a soft, tender laugh. A sound so beautiful it makes me feel warm. I don't think anybody besides my parents have laughed like that around me before. Usually, people are laughing at me and it carries a heavy, mocking tone.
"You're funny." He says, giving the tiniest of smiles. "Alright then, if that's what you want." He says and reaches out again, running his fingers along my jaw.
If only I had known what would come out of this, I would have sent him home immediately. I would have cut all contact with him, perhaps even switched schools.
But I had no idea what was to come, so I didn't do any of that.