Since we've come back a week ago, I spent most of my time at Jake's place. I love Emi and honestly, she's my bestie and that's one of the reasons I also decided to spend more time at Jake's place. Ian is around a lot at the moment and she's so happy with him, I feel like disturbing them. And seeing as my moods have been up and down, I thought it would be best to give her some happy time.
Besides Jake keeps pestering me during school, to stay the night at his place anyway. The great side effect, Jake keeps me distracted well during the night. Evans is a little pissed, when we don't walk back together after work but I guess he understands why I need this right now. Once he had heard from Emi what had happened he even thought about skipping classes too and coming down to help Jake and me prepare the funeral.
Even in this hard time, Evans never fails to put a smile on my face at work. He's simply Evans, the thing I love most about him at the moment, he's the only one not to treat me like I am going to break apart any second.
Another reason why I am staying away from my apartment at the moment. Emi gives me the wary look every time she sees me, as if I was a fucking volcano ready to burst any second and simply crumble down into pieces right after it. Yeah, a fucking comet has hit my own planet and at the moment everything is off axis again, but I can't deal with everyone waiting for my planet to implode through the impact. I had my fucking breakdown and I'd be a liar to say it doesn't hurt. Yes, I lost the last part of my family and a part of me will never be whole again. The dinosaurs on my planet no longer exist, therefore I know there are other wonderful beings trying to gain life on my fucking planet.
I am Samantha Jones and if life has taught me something, then it's not to give in. Life fucking hates me, great. I'll show this fucking life I am ready to kick it's balls. Evans sees this girl in me and I know Jake does too. The difference between the two of them I guess is, Jake saw the state I was in last week and he knows I might fall again.
Jake has given me a key to his apartment so I can come and go as I want, even if he's at the gym or something. Last night I spent the night with Emi, we binge watched Shadowhunters for the millionth time. We can literally speak most of the parts along off by heart. And it reminded me of Jake's and my outfit for Halloween. Apparently, we were the most interesting couple of the night. Guess it had to do with Jake really dating a girl for the first time and making it so obvious.
Tonight I am spending the night at Jake's place again. As it's freaking pouring down with freezing rain, I decide to take my car I have inherited. Thank god I find a free parking lot in front of the house, which is very seldom the case in this town.
Half way up the stairway, I can hear loud yelling coming from Jake's apartment. For a moment I think about coming back later, but I'd rather not go out in the rain. I'll simply wait in the hallway of the apartment until things are settled a little.
Damn I know those voices. I push my key in the keyhole and try to stay as quiet as possible. If Jake needs me, I am ready to jump in and stand at his side.
"Since when are the two of you back together anyway?"
"Fuck you, it's none of your fucking business."
"Oh but it is. What the hell did you think of even going back there in the first place?"
"Her Grams died she needed me. I love Sam. Something you dad, have never even heard of."
Damn I really should have waited outside, this is none of my business. On the other hand it is, for some reason his dad obviously fucking hates me. If I leave now it's too late anyway, they'd hear me.
"You say you love her? You didn't just risk us all, you risked her just as much."
"What? You think they are going to claim the money back for the house from Sam? The money they paid her Grams for her shutting down the files about the rape?" Jake spits with disgust lacing his tone.
My hand clasps in front of my mouth to keep my mouth shut. I feel like screaming but I know I can't, whatever it is about that night, the answers are all right here in front of me. What the hell did he just say about Grams? It doesn't make any sense. I need to keep calm and quiet if I want to perhaps find out the full story.
"You ungrateful bastard, we did everything for you. Watch out how you are talking?" I can't believe he just called his own son that.
"Or what? You going to make my life a hell? You did that to me, mum, Sam and even Emi already. You did nothing for me, only for yourself."
Emi? What the fuck is going on?
"Mum you say something too, he ruined your life just as much as ours. I am done with both of you. Pay me out my share of the company in our name, I am done. All I need in my life is the thing you took away from me, but luckily, she found her way back to me. All that matters to me now is Sam, you can go and fuck yourselves. I am fed up of all your lies."
"Jake, please don't", his mum pleads.
"No mum, I am so sick of all of you. You are a bunch of pathetic liars, who have destroyed so many lives. It's your mistakes and not mine. I've paid enough for them and so have Sam and Emi. Honestly, I don't even get how Sam's Grams could do that to her. You pushed me to lie. But why should her Grams accept the money from Michael's parents after her own granddaughter was raped? I really don't get it. Did they have something in their hand against her too?"
Jake's angry voice is booming through the whole apartment.
"She could see what you aren't able to see. She had a kid she had to take care of but had no money to do so, she needed that money to take care of Sam after her mum died."
"Oh so it's your fault too that even her fucking Grams betrayed her? How many other lives have you two wrecked?"
"Jake please calm down. You know your dad would have gone to prison, if anything had slipped. Michael's parents made sure he wouldn't. I can't live with your dad going to prison because of one mistake."
"Oh but you can live with destroying all our other lives? You can live with a girl being raped, without any justice? Dad deserves to go to prison for what he did. If he hadn't stuck his fucking dick down Emi's mum's mouth while driving, he wouldn't have fucking killed Sam's mother, and none of this would have ever happened." Jake screams from the top of his lungs.
OH MY GOD!!! Everything I had in my arms drops to the ground. The noise lets the three of them turn in my direction. All colour drains from Jake's face and he turns totally pale and looks horrified.
Right now I feel like puking. I don't even know how to breathe anymore.
"Oh my god Sam", he calls out while coming my direction.
"Don't Jake, don't.", my voice comes out calm but determined from shock. I grab my bag and run as fast as I can to my car while tears are now streaming down my face.
Jake comes running after me, but I lock the door before he can reach me.
"Sam don't go. I need you, I love you", he screams while my trembling hands try to get the car started.
He starts pulling at the door without having any luck. Finally I get the car started and escape as fast as I can. Jake is trying to run after me and screaming something I can't even take in any more.
Six weeks ago, my life finally was supposed to take the right turn. I came to Oxford, my dream college. I'd spend time with my bestie. All I wanted was boys, booze party a simple college life for a change. Yeah life sucks and it sucks even more if you have made plans. Making plans obviously is something for idiots. Well for sure it doesn't work for me anyway.
Let's put all the facts together, I ended up here falling in love again. No scratch that, I found the love of my life again, lived together with my bestie. My Grams died, I find out the house I lived in the past five years has been paid with money my Grams received to shut up about my rape and have the files closed. While my boyfriend couldn't tell me the truth about why he lied about my rape, because he was risking his own dad to go to prison as his dad killed my mum while getting a blowjob from Emi's mum.
Every single person I have loved and trusted in my life has left me and lied to me. My whole fucking life has just crumbled to my feet, not one single thing is in its place anymore.
Seriously someone hates me out there, right? This life is so fucked up it must be some fucking joke to someone. It's probably like in one of these movies, I'm not really living my own life it's a reality show. Some sadistic bastard out there is watching me on a TV screen right now and voting what's to happen next.
I can't even go back to my apartment after what I just found out and hey the other best friend I might have is the best mate from my boyfriend and lives above mine and Emi's apartment. With shock I start laughing hysterically, tell me who on earth besides me, gets themselves into such a fucking mess. This isn't a life it's a freak show. Oh and not to forget, I own a house now I can't go, as my rapist is very willing to repeat what he did.
My phone keeps on ringing like the last fifteen minutes or so. His name constantly pops up on the screen, while tears are streaming down my face and I clutch the steering wheel harder. This time it's Emi, I answer.
"Tell me you didn't know." She stays silent. "Emi fucking tell me you didn't know", I yell down the line.
"I'm so sorry Sam, I never stuck to the rules I loved you too much, to turn my back on you completely. But I couldn't let my mum go to prison either."
I hang up. The phone rings a couple of times again. Tears are still streaming down my face, I am now sobbing loud and have no idea where the hell to go. I decide to call the only person I can think of right now.
"Hey Sam", Evans voice answers happily. Obviously, he has no clue my life has just been shredded to bits, but hearing a happy voice right now just seems so surreal to me in this moment. While the world seems normal to others, nothing is normal for me anymore.
"I need your help, I have nowhere to go", I sob loudly.
"Hey, hey, calm down what's happened? What do you mean you have nowhere to go?" Confusion and worry are evident in his voice.
"I have no one left Evans, they all betrayed me, every single one of them. They fucking killed my mum", I cry out loud.
"What the hell are you talking about Sam? Are you driving right now?"
"Yeah I need to get away as far and as fast as I can", the tears are blinding me.
"Pull over Sam, it's damn dangerous out there and you don't sound like you should be driving right now."
"I can't stop, they killed her, they killed my mum."
"Sam tell me where you are right now and stop the freaking car, I'm on my way", he yells through the phone.
"I don't know I just drove off to get away fast, I can see the Themse. I think I am heading direction A34."
"I'll find you, now stop that freaking car."
"I....."
Fuck the road is iced up, I am losing control over my car. In horror and fear I start screaming as I hit something and my car starts tossing and turning upside down. I hear Evans yelling from the loud speaker until my phone gets tossed out of a broken window. After what seems like ages of tossing the car comes to stop on the roof at some tree on a field. I try to free myself from my seatbelt, but it's stuck. I feel all dizzy, I try to look at my injuries but I can't see much, my sight is starting to get all blurry. My hand reaches for my head where I feel a sharp pain, there is definitely a lot of blood on my hands, I must be bleeding quite strong. Slowly but surely, I am starting to feel pain in other body parts too. It's hard to breathe and I think I might have broken quite a few bones. They don't feel right anyway. I'm losing the strength to try and free myself. It's useless.
Darkness is starting to cloud over me while I hear footsteps running towards me.
"Sam, no", I hear Jake cry out devastated.
He crawls into the car through the broken window. I smell something funny, something that shouldn't smell this way, but my mind is too far away already to make out what it is.
"Sam can you hear me?", I don't answer, I can't. "I'm getting you out of here Baby, you hear me. I am not leaving you in here. I am not leaving you anyway, so don't you leave me now, don't you dare give up on us now." His voice breaks.
It feels awfully warm, shouldn't it be feeling cold? My mind is probably playing me tricks already. I feel that I am falling and then Jake's arms pulling at me.
I hear a second voice. "Jake get the hell out of the car, it's going to kill both of you."
"I'm not leaving her, I just cut her seat belt, now I need to pull her out. I can't open the door and the window is so freaking tight. Pull my legs, while I hold on to her."
"Jake this thing is ready to blow up any second. Get the hell out of there."
"Just fucking do it", Jake yells.
I feel a strong pull, torturing every bone in my body right now, but I am not even able to scream anymore.
As cold air wipes around me, I know we made it out, he made it out.
"Hold on Sam, don't leave me you hear me? The ambulance is here any second. I love you Sam, I love you so much, please stay", his voice breaks and I hear him cry.
"They are here Sam, they'll take care of you now. They will make sure you come back to me."
Too late Jake, the darkness is clouding over me completely. Guess mum and Grams are waiting for me.
A/N: Well what shall I say? Is this chapter freaking you out as much as it did me? My heart is breaking 💔
Please don't hate me! Next chapter will have to be Jake's POV
Even if you do hate me right now, please don't forget to comment and vote.