Please Take Me Home
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Chapter Twenty-Eight
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Here's Your Letter
If felt like the world had toppled over, taking Luke with it.
Luke was tired, his eyes hurt and it felt like he hadn't had a good sleep in ages. He felt more horrible than ever and certainly wasn't afraid to advertise his mood.
Anxiously, Luke kept looking at his phone, knowing that he should probably call Michael or something, because no one deserved any sort of treatment like what Luke had dished out the previous night. He knew how badly words could cut and he hadn't refrained in anyway towards Michael, going to town with telling him exactly how he felt.
Regret, regret, regret. That's what Luke was feeling. What if Michael had taken Luke's angry words to heart and actually listened to him? All night Luke had been worrying over the thought of never seeing Michael ever again. And quite frankly, Luke wouldn't be able to handle that.
As much as Michael infuriated him, Luke loved him double. And that was the infuriating part. Luke cared so much and it scared him because he knew Michael didn't nearly feel the same way.
Lots of scenarios had been running through his head. If Luke were to contact Michael and get an answer from him, Luke would most defiantly apologise and then ask Michael if there was anything that he could do to help him and then maybe, if Michael trusted him enough, he might get the full run down of what has been going on in Michael's life for the last year and a bit.
But the agony of that would be that Luke wants no more than to tell Michael how it is and tell him how much he effects him, the good and the bad. There was just so much to say and Luke was no poet. He couldn't woo Michael with words or paint a picture of how much their differences were tearing him apart.
'We don't work together', often rung in his head like a mantra but Luke always pushed it aside. He knew he could be stubborn, and rude, and awful. He knew he could completely disregard someone's own feelings and he defiantly knew his emotions could turn a full 180 at any given moment. But even with that, he knew that he wouldn't lose Michael this time.
***
On the way home, Michael realised that he was the sort of people to ignore the problems in his life and filter them out with the help of something recreational. But while Michael was walking along the pathway, money heavy in his hoodie's pocket, he realised that there was no way he could blow this off.
He should have just told Luke.
From the start, being honest with Luke would have been the way to go because if there was any lesson that would come out from this, it was that Luke really didn't appreciate not knowing the whole truth.
It's so fucking stupid, he thought. Why did this have to happen to him? What did Michael do to deserve all the pain and angst in his life? He was in trouble, if the twisted feeling on guilt in his stomach had anything to say about it, oh boy how he knew.
But really, how would someone like Luke react to the information that one of his oldest friends was the shittiest drug addict in the world who couldn't even pay for his addiction. He was pathetic with every sense of the word. Michael knew that Luke wouldn't take it well, he just knew. It really wasn't something that most people felt positively about and Michael knew that he would always be apart of the minority who felt that drugs, really, weren't all that bad.
But another thing Michael knew, he knew that no one would care for his opinion. Who would listen to the kid in ratty jeans with a poor, destitute childhood? Oh right, no one.
He was just a reject, an idiot, and a social casualty. The degrading list could go on...
Even though Michael had put his jacket on, he still felt the cold in his bones and that didn't do anything but cause him more pain due to the contrast of his inflamed and bruised forearms and chest.
He hurt, he was hurt and Michael knew that there was going to be more hurting in the near future. Whether that be in his behalf or inflicted on someone else.
***
Liz had heard the whole exchange from where she had sat on the couch. Even with the front door between her and the two, (and even though the other two had been outside), she heard every single word.
It pained her, to hear everything that her son had said to the other boy. She knew how much Luke cared about Michael. She had always known that but it was different now, that they were both grown up.
It was inevitable that they would both go their separate ways. They grew up and change, because that's what people do. Change is just apart of human growth and adapting to the environment, which could be traced back to survival instincts. People change. They change their opinions, how they react, their preferences, and their likes/dislikes... It's normal.
But to see Luke and Michael together, and how they work compared to when they were younger, it really blows her mind.
Michael was the shy boy. The shy little boy who wouldn't say much in case of saying the wrong thing, but when Liz saw Michael that one time in the petrol station, it was a big slap in the face, to how much Michael had changed.
Sure, she didn't expect Michael to be the same unsure, shy kid that had become a second son to her. She had expected some change, like the aftermath puberty and a change of wardrobe, obviously. But she hadn't expected to see Michael more than grown up, with thin shoulders with protruding neck and collarbones. No, it hadn't crossed her mind at all. Michael had lost the entire childlike look to him. His hair was no longer the dirty blonde that it used to be and Liz was sure that she saw a couple of piercings. Michael looked tired to her. He had the dark circles that would take more than a good night sleep to get rid of.
He had also looked lost. Like there was no place for Michael Clifford and he had chosen to rebel against society's standards. Liz saw this everyday; with the job she had teaching at a high school. She saw those types of kids and how they thought of themselves as misunderstood and no one could help them. She heard about all the trouble some of them got into and she wasn't sure, when seeing Michael, if he was the same.
Michael was a good kid. Always was quiet and did what he was told, but that was child Michael, Liz wasn't sure about this Michael.
But she saw the way Luke acted when he thought that she didn't notice the change in his mood. Luke had this radiant energy about him, when he was happy, like he wanted everyone else to feel the same. The downside to that was that it worked with every mood. Liz could always tell what sort of mood Luke was in, even if he thought differently.
Liz saw the effect Michael had on Luke. She could tell especially when Luke had come back from he day out that they had spent together. Even from an early age, Luke had learnt to love quickly, so it was no surprise to her that she noticed that maybe Luke and Michael were a little bit more.
She was worried though, because Michael had changed so much and she still loved that like he was her own. And all she wanted is for him to be safe.
***
Waking up, Michael realised that today was the day were he had to somehow deposit the large sum of money that he had gotten to all sorts of trouble trying to get, (and keep).
Now Michael had no idea how he was going to do this. Would they call him? Would they meet up with him or would Michael have to scope them out somehow? Sighing, Michael turned over in his bed and muffled a groan due to his protesting body.
Nope, Michael was defiantly content with staying in bed all day, but its not like things we're ever going to go his way. Screw it all, he thought and Michael flipped his pillow and was ready to waste the day away until his phone started buzzing from his bedside table with was conveniently on the other side of were he was laying.
Michael had finally braced himself and was half balancing his own weight on one hand while reaching for his phone which after a couple times of hitting it, he got ahold of it. Letting out a series of curses, he picked up and was certainly surprised to hear his older cousin Jesse on the other end.
"Is this Michael Clifford?" Jesse, his cousin, said rushed and not like he would normally say.
Confused, Michael let out a puff of air and rolled himself over so he was lying on his back again, muffling a small protest of pain. "Um, yeah?"
"Okay so..." Jesse trailed off and Michael could hear other voices on Jesse's end and he realised that Jesse wasn't alone and most likely; they could hear their conversation. "...I'm going to give you an address, come tonight at eight..." Jesse told Michael the address and Michael was certain that Jesse was going to say more but he hung up and Michael was left with the three dull beeps that signaled the end of the call.
How curious. Michael had been trying to get ahold of Jesse for days and only now, still early in the morning. Also, Michael doesn't remember the last time when Jesse had spoken normally and not exclaimed the obligatory or ironic, (Michael isn't sure anymore), 'bitch' or 'yo'.
Now with knowing what time he had to drop off the money, and where, didn't make Michael feel any better. But truth be told, he did write down the destination in his phone, and then fall back asleep, wishing, praying, that this whole ordeal went to plan.
***
Luke's mood really hadn't improved at all. He was still silently going over the event and analysing it from different angles.
His mum had noticed that talking to Luke about what happened would most likely end badly, so she didn't say anything and went back to preparing their meal.
Luke was sat on the couch, watching television but not really taking anything in. If he was going to brood, he was going to do it properly, dammit. Luke almost didn't hear his mum call him, but the gentle hand on his shoulder brought him back.
While sat at the table, Luke just stared at his dinner. It wasn't much, nothing extremely fancy, just microwavable vegetables, sausages with tomato sauce on the side and a bit of salad. They didn't bother with going to extreme lengths for a meal.
Picking at the vegetables on his plate, Luke ignored his mother's attempts of conversation and kept to himself. Nothing else was said once Liz realised that Luke wasn't going to cooperate.
Once Luke had finished, leaving the salad untouched, Luke dealt with his dishes and went back to his room. After closing the door, Luke chose to put on some music and curl up in bed.
Luke felt his phone buzz from under his pillow, where it laid untouched, still on the changer from last night and it didn't take long before he checked whom it was. Really, Luke was half expecting it to be nothing but Luke couldn't help his heart racing just the bit faster when seeing who it was.
***
When the person on the other end picked up, Michael hung up, turned his phone off and threw it down onto his bed. He wouldn't need it.
Michael made sure he put on his jacket and double-checked that the money was safely secured within the fold because Michael really didn't fancy misplacing it again.
The address that he was instructed to go to wasn't that hard to find and Michael made sure he was there ahead of time. To pass the time Michael picked at the sleeve of his hoodie and pulled on any loose ends. Eventually, after nearly picking a hole in his clothing, Michael heard various voices coming towards him.
Michael tried not to be tense as the group of what he presumed was the 'distributors' that Jesse had stolen from. Speaking of, Michael could see no sign of his older cousin.
"Is this the boy?" One voice asked. Michael didn't get a good look at their faces but he could tell that they were a deal bit older than him.
"Certainly looks the part." One sniggered and the rest of the group laughed.
Feeling intimidated, Michael shrunk into himself and insecurely hugged his sore rips, feeling each rise and dip from where the skin wasn't inflamed. The other men laughed at the sight of Michael cowering.
"Hey!" The first man asked, gesturing to someone behind the group, "Is this the one?"
Michael didn't hear an answer but there was a pause and then the sound of someone getting hit and a muttering of, "Use your fucking words." Whoever was hit whimpered and stayed silent even after the exclamation.
The group then turned back to Michael and he decided that getting the money out and paying would probably be a good idea. But what stopped him from handing the money over straight away was the whereabouts of his cousin.
Feeling brave, Michael willed for his heart to stop beating so fast and he stood up straight and handed the money over only to pull it back towards himself quickly. "Where's Jesse?"
Again, the group of them laughed like Michael had said the funniest joke in the world. "He's braver than he looks."
He didn't answer to that but Michael's wonderings were put to rest when they threw someone towards him, the person falling down into a messy heap. Michael averted his eyes as the person in front of him struggled to get up. From the glimpse Michael had gotten he saw that the person looked worse for wear. Their clothing looked like it hadn't been washed in forever and they looked underfed and sick under the array of bruises that littered their skin. Once the person gained their composure, Michael realised that that had been Jesse all along.
What had these people done to him?
He looked nothing like the Jesse he remembered. His head was shaven and his previously joking and sarcastic eyes now looked sad and empty. Michael held out a hand to bring Jesse closer to him and passed the money one of the older guys.
"Come on Jesse, let's go." Michael put an arm under Jesse's shoulders to support most of his weight and went to start walking away; only he was stopped, again, by the laughter of the older group.
"You really think that we we're going to let you leave?" Said the closest man, whom Michael presumed was the leader.
Fear dripped down Michael like cold water. Michael was too naïve for his own good. He really shouldn't have expected to get out of this without pulling a few strings.
"Why not? We've given you your money." Michael said and he used all his willpower to speak calmly and not show how afraid he actually was.
The leader looked at Michael curiously. "You think you're smart." The older man started walking towards him and his lip curled in disgust when he looked down at Jesse who was hanging against Michael's body. "You're not going to be smart for much longer."
***
The boy was sat alone in his room.
The door had been closed ever since he came home on Friday night with split knuckles and a busted lip. It almost seemed like an award. All week he had been recovered from the brutal fight be had been apart of and it was only when the next fight came up, was he all healed and ready to go at it again.
It was hard trying to come up with excuses to him mum, dad and sister. All of them had been more than worried when he had come home bruised more often than not. But they bought every fabricated lie he told them and he was left in peace.
But the most recent Friday night, on the other hand, had been a treat. Just the split-second hesitation and he had his opponent down. He knew he should have stopped when Michael tapped out but it felt too good to stop there.
It was like a dream, really. It was everything he could have asked for.
Calum sat alone in his room... Marveling over how powerful he felt and how Michael didn't even know that it was him who pushed him into the ground.
* I was tagged in that 25 facts thing by @AwkwardnessIsKey but I'll give you a few facts, only because there's not a lot about me c:
1. My name is Emily.
2. I'm the middle child.
3. My birthday is one day after Dan Howell's.
4. I'm muke af (obviously).
5. I become way too obsessed with TV shows...
6. I have a very ironic and sarcastic sense of humor.
7. I'm sort of a private person (sorry!)
Okay there. I tag: @jazzdouglasx because she's the one who convinced me to buy the SLSP EP when I was meant to pay for my lunch. Thus, being the person to get me fully into 5sos.
Thank you so much for reading, like it really, really means a lot to me <3
Please comment and stuff, I read every single one and love them all.
(One day I will fix typos, but today isn't one of them.)
School starts back soon so there might be a delay in updates...
Thank you! *
- asphyxiationxo