Being the sister of an F1 driver isn't always easy. Especially not when your ex-boyfriend, Charles Leclerc, is a driver too. It wasn't that things ended badly between the two of you, you just couldn't be around him anymore because loving him hurt so much. When you were around him, you wouldn't breathe, but when he was gone, you also couldn't breathe. You lived with the constant fear that something would happen to him, that he would leave you for someone else. You had all these thoughts and scenarios that were going through your head, and you just couldn't take it anymore, so you decided to break up with him. You stopped coming to races for two months. You stopped posting on social media. For many people, it was like you completely disappeared.
Even though you and your ex broke up, he still cared about you. He still got questions about what happened between the two of you, but he had no answer. He had no idea what happened. To him, you just shut him out. You were so happy in the beginning, and then things started to change, and you got distant. You began to push him away. To him, you were heartless. You broke up with him through a text, and he just didn't understand why. He wanted to talk to you, but you didn't answer his calls. Nobody could reach you.
Even your brother, Daniel Ricciardo, hadn't spoken to you in two months. All he knew that you were save and needed some time alone. Usually, you would've told him. There was a big age gap between the two of you, but that's what made you closer. You told your big brother everything, and he was always there for you, but then you disappeared without saying anything. He didn't even know why you broke up with Charles.
Two months ago you were last seen on the track. Today you decided to surprise your brother at the race. You headed to the Renault garage with a big smile on your face. Daniel had no idea that you were coming and you couldn't wait to see the look on his face.
You walked into the garage and saw Daniel talking to his engineer.
'Long time no see, Dan,' you said.
His head shot up. He felt mixed emotions. He didn't know if he wanted to be mad at you for leaving, or happy that you were back. He decided to go with happy. He could be angry later. A smile grew on his face, and we walked towards you, taking you in his arms.
'Please don't ever do that again,' he whispered.
'Not planning on doing that. I just needed some time for myself. I'm sorry for not talking to you,' you apologized.
'I'm glad you're back. You're not going to tell me why you left, are you?'
You shook your head. 'Maybe when we're back at the hotel. But not now,' you said as you noticed that people were looking at you. Of course, they were. You disappeared for two months, and suddenly your back like nothing happened.
Daniel looked at the time. He had to get in the car soon. 'I have to get going, but we'll talk after today, okay? You can hang out here or in my room, whatever you want,' Daniel said.
'Thanks.' You hugged him again. You were glad you were back.
You left the Renault garage with a smile on your face. You were greeted by some people as you made your way over to the Renault facility. You stopped when you saw Charles walking out of the Ferrari facility. His eyes met yours, and you could see that he was in shock. He started to walk towards you, but before he could reach you, you sprinted into the Renault facility. You knew that you were going to run into him and you thought you would be ready, but when you just saw him, all the feelings and happy memories came back.
Tears stung in your eyes as you thought back on those moments. You were so happy, while at the same time hurting so much. He made you a better person, he made you wake up with a smile, the colours in life for brighter. But at the same time, it was the worst part of your life. Loving him hurt so much. You didn't know if he would come back after a race. You didn't know if he was seeing other girls when you weren't around, you loved him so much that it hurt. You got away, and it took you time to rebuild yourself and to get over the break-up. You thought you were over him, but as soon as his eyes met yours, all the feelings came back, all the happy memories, the sad ones and the pain came along with it, and you didn't know what to do. You wanted to disappear, to never come back, but you didn't want to run again. You wanted to be around your brother, have fun and enjoy the races like you used to do. But it would never be the same again.
You made your way over to Daniel his room and sat there for a moment. You then packed your stuff and headed out. You just needed to get out of here.
'Y/N, can we talk?'
You turned around as soon as you heard his voice. He stood up from the chair he was sitting on, right in front of the Renault facility. He had been waiting for you? Why would he do that?
'I can't,' you said and tried to sound as distant as you could.
Charles studied your face, and then he saw the bag on your shoulder. 'You're leaving again?'
You bit the inside of your cheek, not knowing what to say. Yes, you were leaving again, but not completely. You would just never come to the track again. Not as long Charles was a Formula One driver. 'I really have to go,' you mumbled and walked away from him.
'Why do you have to be so heartless?' Charles yelled at you. 'Why won't you just let me in?'
You turned around. 'When I'm going to let you in, it's going to hurt like hell, and I can't take that. I can't handle that. It was tearing me apart, Charles. Loving you was tearing me apart. It hurts to be around you, and it hurts when I'm not around you! I was over you, and I made the mistake of coming back here!' you yelled back at him.
Charles looked at you in shock. He wanted to kiss you so bad. He wanted to wrap his arms around you and take you home. He never loved anyone in his life so much. He had no idea that you felt that way. 'Then why push me away? Why not talk to me?'
'Because I don't want to! I don't want to talk about it, because there is nothing we can fix. I'm scared that every time you're not responding to my texts or not answering the phone, that you're hurt or that something worse has happened to you. You can't fix that.'
'We can! We can talk to someone who can help us.'
You shook your head. 'I tried, Charles. I really did. Because I love you so much. And even though it hurts so much, I tried to hold on, because I didn't want to leave you. But what would you do when you love someone so much that it just hurts? Everything hurts, Charles, and I don't know what to do.' The first tear streamed down your face and soon more followed.
'But you're not the only one who feels that way.'
What...? You look at Charles, confused, not knowing what to do. 'What do you mean?'
'Don't you think that loving you doesn't hurt? Every time we say goodbye, it feels like I leave a part of me behind. Every time I see you cry, my hearts breaks, and I want to do everything I can to fix it, but most of the time, you're crying about me, because I'm leaving again or I got into a crash. Love is never easy. Nobody has said love is easy and not painful. If love is not painful, you're not with the right person. But you are the right person for me, Y/N. From the moment I first saw you at the paddock, till now. You're still the woman I love and want to be with for the rest of my life. I don't care that it hurts, because I want to be with you. Just... let me in. Please... I'm begging you.' Charles slowly walked over to you.
You wanted to take a step back. You wanted to turn around and not come back. But you also wanted to jump in his arms, kiss him until you couldn't breathe anymore, you wanted to be with him again. He felt the same way. Didn't that mean something? Or where you just bad for each other and you both needed to move on. You dropped your bag on the floor.
Charles his face was lighting up a little.
'I...' What were you going to say? You closed your mouth, walked over to Charles and pressed your lips against his. Fireworks got send off through your body, and it felt like it was your first kiss all over again.
'Never leave me again,' Charles said when he pulled back from the kiss.
'I promise,' you mumbled and kissed him again.