Evans lips are soft and the taste of his cherry chewing gum lingers on them. He took me totally by surprise. My lips automatically move along with his. His kiss is soft and tender it feels good.
It takes a few moments until I realize I shouldn't be doing this. Even if it feels good, but it doesn't feel fair or right. Gently I push him away and loosen myself out of his arms.
"I'm sorry Evans, I can't do this right now. I like you a lot and I need to know I am clear at mind and really want this."
He sighs. "No, it's my fault Sam, I tried although I knew you aren't ready. You just told me minutes ago. But I won't deny I liked how it felt to have your lips on mine."
Fuck why does he have to be so sweet and damn sexy at the same time?
I give him a quick peck on the cheek and enter our apartment before I do something stupid. At the moment I simply don't fucking know if I want more or not, it's so confusing.
******
Nightmares kept me up most of the night, I badly need my coffee before I am able to do anything at all. Because I am too tired to even care about my messy curls this morning I simply decide to leave them open.
The damn weather has changed too, it's officially autumn. Which won't stop me from wearing my t-shirts though. I usually pick my shirts according to my mood or whatever I feel like expressing for the day. After those nightmares I decide for: Run if I am not holding a coffee
Matching exactly the mood I'm in today. Even Emily keeps her mouth shut this morning, knowing I am in a mood.
Sitting in class Jake gives me a side glance, while I am stuck to my second coffee to go. My hand in a death grip around my cup.
"You ok?", he whispers softly.
"Do I look like I'm ok?", I growl.
"Oooook. You wanna talk?"
"Fuck no, I just want my fucking coffee."
"Bloody Mary?"
I roll my eyes, he didn't just honestly ask me if I have my period? And to top it off right here in class?
"Shut the fuck up. And no. Just fucking tired because of my nightmares. You leaving me in peace now? Because I really need this coffee badly."
"Nightmares?"
Instead of answering I growl as response hoping he gets the message and he'll finally leave me in peace which he thankfully does. Damn I didn't even want to mention the nightmares to him.
Once classes come to an end and I had plenty of coffee in my breaks I feel a bit better.
"I'll take more attention of what is written on your shirt in future and take the advice. You up for our homework?", Jake asks carefully while following me out of class.
"Yes, I guess I've had enough coffee to cope with it, instead of shredding it to pieces", I chuckle while slipping into my black leather jacket.
"Fuck that looks good on you and your open hair matches that slight wild look very well."
"You know I hate my hair like this, I just couldn't bother this morning."
"Well I like it", he shrugs and my stupid heartbeat speeds up again with his words.
None of us both thought about taking an umbrella along, by the time we reach Jake's apartment both of us are soaked. Jake throws me a towel for my face and hair. Right now, I am happy not to be one of these girls, who's face is absolutely caked with make-up, I am sure it would be all over the place. All I am wearing is a waterproof mascara. Thank fuck! Otherwise I would be sat here the next few hours looking absolute ridiculous.
"You need to get out of those wet clothes, you'll catch a flu otherwise", Jake says while looking at my totally soaked body.
I laugh out loud. "Is this your attempt to see me naked once more? Forget about it."
"Honey you know I wouldn't mind seeing you naked. But I did think I might be so polite to lend you a shirt and sweatpants of mine."
"I can't just wear your clothes", I protest.
"It's up to you, you can freeze and end up with fever or whatever tomorrow. Or you could stop being so fucking stubborn and wear my stuff until yours are dry."
"Fine", I mumble, knowing he is right.
With that he disappears in his bedroom. Shortly later he comes out only wearing sweatpants himself, while handing me some stuff.
Oh my god, seeing him in daylight half naked is like ten levels or more, better than what I saw during the night. His dark brown wet hair is falling slightly into his face and covering a part of his side cuts. This is like Dominic Sherwood's hairstyle only in dark.
But it's not just his hair which is fascinating me right now. When I thought the first time round he looked like he stepped out of a magazine, I only saw him in dim light. Now this is.... wow. Only looking at his perfect shaped muscles gets my mouth watering, to be honest even more than that. The sight has my legs clenching.
He's the exact balance between having too little muscles or having too much. It's not like Dwayne the Rock Johnson, which in my taste is too much. It's more like a tad bit more than Channing Tatum. Fuck how the hell did Jake manage to end up this hot? Seriously I've never seen a hotter guy before. His pants hang really low, showing the perfect V-shape at the bottom of his abs. Gosh I need to stop staring at him, otherwise I might just jump at him. Averting my gaze, I clear my throat.
"Aren't you too cold?"
He chuckles in a dirty way. "What you mind me running around half naked in my apartment?"
"Uhhm no, feel free it's your apartment I just thought you might feel a little cold." Damn him, he is doing this on purpose, but I am not going to jump in on his attempt, getting those words he wants to hear out of me.
"I'll put the fire place on. I'm kind of running out of shirts, you know been a bit lazy with laundry lately. And it was either me to go without or you. I thought I'd act gentleman."
"Right, as if you would ever act like a gentleman." I'm surprised that word even exists in his vocabulary.
"I offered you my clothes, right? To make sure you wouldn't catch a cold. And I'll even make you a coffee", his face gleaming with a slight mischief he is trying to hide so hard.
"Yeah and tonight you are going to jerk off, thinking about me wearing your clothes."
"Jeez Sam, since when has your mind turned so dirty? Keep talking dirty and I'll be jerking off to your dirty thoughts."
I chuckle. "You have no idea about my dirty thoughts Jake and how dirty they can get. You'd be jerking off right now, if you knew." I leave with his clothes to the direction he showed me for his bathroom, leaving him behind with his jaw dropped.
Ha, serves you right Mister, running around half naked. I'm sure he's dealing a boner right now after my words. Just the thought me backfiring at him like that makes me laugh. Then again it wasn't a lie, after all his body was causing dirty thoughts in my mind. Damn.
A look at his washing basket tells me he has been totally lying about not doing the laundry. There's only one t-shirt left in that basket, the one he was wearing yesterday.
You wait, I'm going to serve you right for this little game. You want to play? I can do that just the same.
With a little excitement I leave the bathroom in his t-shirt and sweatpants. Game on! I'm unable to hold back a smirk while calling out.
"Jake, can I hang my clothes near the fireplace?"
"Sure, just pull a chair near it and hang it up", he answers while walking over to me with two coffees in the hand. "Fuck, you aren't wearing a bra under my t-shirt?"
"Yep, sorry I was drenched to the bone." I grab the chair and concentrate so damn hard on keeping my face straight while placing my black lace panties on the chair. His eyes widen and look like they are going to bulge out the sockets any moment, while I try to keep back a chuckle. He sprays the coffee across the room that had just been in his mouth.
"Holy fuck, Sam you serious? You aren't wearing any underwear under my clothes?"
"Like I said, drenched to the bone. But thanks for lending me your stuff", I shrug and play it off cool.
"You are killing me right now, you know that? I am even fucking harder than when you bent over in those hotpants last week."
"Yeah, well I thought your game wasn't quite fair. I saw your washing basket. Let me guess, your wardrobe is well filled with enough shirts", I say with a wink.
He laughs and has a dead dirty look on his face. "Shit forgot how clever you are, well played. You have become a dirty little badass Skater girl."
"I know and I like myself this way", I reply with a cocky grin.
"Well even if my game backfired, can't say I mind it. Fucking worth it. But what do I do with my fucking hard dick now?"
I shrug and laugh. "No idea, you might get some blue balls. So worth it!", I give him a wink while taking my coffee off of him. Leaving a speechless Jake behind me. "We better start our homework anyway or we'll never get done."
"You don't think I'll even get one fucking word in my head knowing you are sat here without any underwear."
"Well you better had, because we only have a couple of days left to work this out. I can stay longer today anyway. I only work every second night this week, giving me time to learn here with you."
"I can't believe you are doing this", he laughs while his hands run through his hair. "So hot, fuck."
Well Jake you better learn not to mess with me.
On the other hand, I can't believe we are acting so normal with each other. Perhaps that talk yesterday did do some good.
We sit down on his couch near the fireplace and start working through our topics for today. It's damn hard for me too, to concentrate on my work with Jake sitting there half naked. The biggest issue right now is, that I know how his body feels and how his muscles move. It keeps on slipping into my thoughts.
Girl stop thinking about it. I feel like slamming my head to get those thoughts out of it.
His eyes also constantly start lingering on me.
"Focus Jake."
"I am, just not on my homework."
After a whole while we do manage to work through our topics of the day. Jake scoots closer to me, so we can figure the differences out again.
His naked torso so close to me is tensing me up. Fuck what the hell am I doing here? Maybe playing that stupid game wasn't a good idea after all. I should have just told him to wear a fucking shirt.
At some point I reach over to underline a point on Jake's list, leaning myself slightly against him. Heat waves hit me as soon as our bodies make contact. Jake's skin reacts immediately with a slight shiver.
I want to pull back straight away, but Jake holds on tight. His hand pushes under my chin making me look up at him. His amazing green eyes set on mine. I bite my lip, while Jake cups my face with both hands. My skin burns under his touch while his left hand starts caressing my cheek, his eyes are still locked with mine.
My body feels like melting away right now. Fuck no, I can't let this happen, so I clear my throat and draw back. Jake sighs and I hear his breath is coming heavy just as mine.
"I've always missed you Sam. Always. And last week, the both of us. It was the fucking best night of my life. I know I fucked up really bad, but you can't deny you feel this between both of us."
"Jake what you are feeling right now is my lack of underwear", I try to put it off.
"That's not true and you know it. Does it fucking turn me on? Hell yes. But this is far more than that. Anytime you are close I feel like the air around us is electrified. One look at you and my mind goes all other the place, I can't fucking think straight. I've never felt any of this other than with you. And at least your body is telling me it needs me too."
"Jake, I need to go." The sudden urge to run becomes overwhelming.
"What? Wait, no please don't go Sam. You know I'd never force you to anything, I'd never do anything you wouldn't want. Just please don't go."
"Jake I'm in a right mess. So much has happened within the last one and a half weeks. I have no idea what to feel or think. And I don't fucking trust myself at the moment."
"What do mean you don't trust yourself?", he questions with irritation.
"I am losing my god damn senses when I am around you Jake. Nothing makes sense anymore. The last five years have been hell and I can't just wipe them away."
"Fuck I know Sam. Look I'll hold back, if you'll just stay now. Please just don't go. We can do our homework, as we still have plenty to work out. I can order us some food we'll just hang around. Please!", he pleads and his eyes are full of worry.
God these eyes are killing me again. Why can't I just resist and be angry with him again?
A/N: There sure is some tension in the air. Could you feel this tension around Evans? Or is it just with Jake? What do you think, should Sam stay? And what do you think about Jake now?
Hope you enjoy reading. Stay tuned in, I think we are heading for some more tension soon.
Please remember to comment and vote :)