Beginnings were always awkward for me. Whenever I started something new, my stomach would tie itself into a nervous knot.
I had gotten up early, been for a run, showered, and eaten breakfast. Some tunes played from the laptop that sat on my bed as I peered into my wardrobe, wondering what to wear. I wanted to make a good impression on my first day. This is because most of my past 'first days' hadn't worked out so well... Those memories weren't something I wanted to dwell on, so I swallowed them down.
My eyes skimmed over a cute light blue dress that fell below the knee. I thought about it for a second... Would this be too much?
Oh well. Let's just do it, zero regrets, right?
I grabbed it and slipped it on. After taking a glance in the mirror, I felt confident about pairing it with a long thin embroidered blue and white cardigan and some cute, thin bracelets.
Okay, Jia. You've got this, let's go!
I closed my laptop, cleaned up the few loose lyric sheets laying on my bed and then grabbed my bag. Some low wedges were by the front door, so I slipped them on. Making sure I have everything I need, I leave the apartment. The door clicks shut behind me.
The walk down the hall was a few strides away from the elevator, and the wait time wasn't long. As I stepped out of the apartment block, I felt the warm rays of the sun. A light breeze ruffled the bottom of my dress. It was so refreshing that I couldn't help but smile. Luckily, the campus wasn't far. After about five minutes of walking down the somewhat busy city street, a more open area came into view;
A large pond connected two of the buildings, giving it a modern, yet peaceful, traditional feel. The campus was so huge that even from this view, I couldn't see all of it. But from what I could see, it was aesthetically pleasing. I grabbed my phone out of my bag and checked my timetable. The building I needed wasn't far, so I made my way there. I got to the classroom I was looking for easily.
As I walked in, I saw that there weren't as many people as I'd expected. Perhaps everyone came at the last minute or this topic wasn't very popular.
As I looked up the aisles, I noticed a set of free seats. It was close enough to a small group of girls that I might talk with and make friends. I walked up the small steps of the aisle. As I shuffled into the row and sat down, a few of the girls looked my way, so I smiled and gave a brief wave. But they turned their backs and started whispering...
Had I done something wrong?
I decided not to worry about it. I'm sure there would be more opportunities to make friends. With that in mind, I started thinking about the class subject which was the Korean Language. This subject was an important one for my major, so I should probably just focus on that.
I took out my things and set them up to take notes. Suddenly, I saw the chair beside me being pulled back as if someone was about to sit right next to me. I turned my head slightly to see a blonde guy. He looked back at me plainly before breaking out into an endearing smile.
"Hey there, sorry didn't mean to startle you" He rubbed the back of his head.
"Is it okay if I sit here?" He questioned. Pausing for a moment for my response, still smiling lightly.
"Oh! Of course, it's okay! Go ahead," I quickly reply, returning his smile. The way he sat down and set his bag on the ground was mesmerising. Even the way he extended his hand out to shake mine.
"Thanks, I'm Jimin" his eyes connect with my own. I had to force myself not to get lost in them.
"Jia," I say, taking his hand in mine and giving it a brief shake before going to take out his notepad from his bag. Jimin has a cheeky air about him. It surprised me he'd so willingly sat next to me. Suddenly, someone else takes the seat beside Jimin. His vibes are stronger, not in the light way that Jimin came across, more of a cool customer.
"Tae?! What? Why are you here? Are you stalking me, Hm?" Jimin lightly laughed. They already knew each other. Tae gives him a mischievous look.
"Nooo. I wanted to surprise you so I didn't tell you we were in the same class" His expression smugly changed. I had to admit, his features were... really something else. He was slightly larger in frame than Jimin but, they both had good muscle definition. Wait, why the hell am I thinking about this?
"Ahh, you should have just told me! I was worried this class was going to be boring," Jimin laughed, hitting his shoulder playfully.
Tae's gaze fell to me, lingering for a moment. I did not know what emotion was behind them, but it was strong and it caused my chest to tighten. He'd perhaps noticed I was looking their way. But Jimin caught on, glancing back at me.
"Oh yeah. This is Jia" He added casually, as to introduce us.
Tae's flashed a faint smile, reaching over Jimin to shake my hand. The warmth of his palm lingered despite being brief. What started as one brand-new face had quickly turned into two. I didn't want to make it obvious. But I was feeling a bit self-conscious.
"I'm Tae-Hyung. Just call me Tae though, it's easier," he said, plopping back into his seat lazily.
"Sure. So, are you both friends from High School or?" I asked. Jimin tilted his head in my direction, running his hand through his hair.
"Was it Middle School? I can't remember," he feigned momentarily.
"We are both trainees at the same entertainment company. We also take the major in K-Culture together," he glanced back at Tae, who nodded in agreement. He is now taking things out of his bag as well.
"That's cool. Must be why you guys seem so close." I smile, moving on to tell them more about myself. "I'm a Communication Major. I was thinking of doing K-Culture, but I decided on Communications instead."
Tae looked up from his bag. They focused on me, perhaps wanting to know more. But there was something else that nagged at me.
From the corner of my eye, I noticed the girls from earlier. They were giving me side stares and gossiping about something out of earshot. Despite not being able to make out what was being said, experience had taught me a lot. It most likely wasn't anything pleasant, either.
I remember when I was in High School; in the beginning, many people didn't talk to me, gossiped or just blatantly made assumptions about me because of my looks. My features aren't completely Korean, my hair is blonde and my eyes are blue. You'd think that standing out would be a nice thing. But, it led to some horrible things happening...
I accidentally sigh. Turning back to the boys. Their gaze averts curiously towards the girls behind me.
"Huh? What happened? Do you know them?" Tae questioned. I shook my head. Jimin, on the other hand, had picked up on what was going on. He was sharper than he'd initially let on.
"Don't worry about it. Jealousy is ugly, isn't it?" he muses. My face flushes at the suggestion. Did I have anything to be that jealous of? "Jealous? Wait, what?" I laughed. Awkwardly. Trying to play it off, his comment has disarmed me.
"Ohhh," Tae mouthed in realisation.
"Hm. You're really pretty. It's obvious they're just eyeing you off to compensate for their own low self-esteem." Jimin contemplates as he examines my features. Tae also steals a glance.
"Don't take that the wrong way, though! I'm not trying to hit on you" He waves his hands and laughs innocently. This was doing nothing to settle the heat in my cheeks. I just laughed along too.
"I'll take it as a compliment. Don't worry." Luckily, my attempt to brush over the topic casually seemed to have worked. Before any of us could say anything else, the teacher walks in and addresses the class. He captures the class easily with his voice that echoes throughout the room.
"Good Morning class, welcome to the Korean Language. My name is Professor Kwon. I'm going to start by giving you this term assessment information." I followed along as he read through the units and assessments. My eyes dropped onto the next line: group report.
"Now, before we go any further, I want to assign groups for the report. Don't waste any time getting them done" He picked up a folder, pulled out a list, and began reading out the groups by calling students' names.
Finally, I heard my name being called, so I raised my hand. The teacher's eyes spotted me.
"Park Jia, you'll be with Park Jimin and Kim Tae-hyung" his eyes scanned the class to find the people he'd called out. Jimin shot up quickly with impeccable reflexes. After confirming his name, he sat back down and flashed me a subtle yet confident look. His personality is so eye-catching. To show he was with the rest of his group, Tae raised his hand.
The professor continued to go over the outline of the upcoming units for the semester until, eventually; the class had ended. I started packing up my things. As I did, I thought about the group task again and an idea came to me instantly.
"So... Should we have a group chat or something, maybe?" I asked the boys beside me. It was a fair reason for me to message them, but I felt myself shrink a bit when they both looked over at me. Asking for boys' numbers wasn't something I usually did.
"You're smart, that's probably a good idea," Tae contemplated before pulling out his phone. They both added me to Kakao. No one uses numbers these days, anyway. "Let's figure out a time to meet later," Tae's deep voice hummed smoothly.
"Sounds good," I nod before grabbing my bag and standing up. Jimin follows, pushing in his chair before turning to face me.
"So, where are you heading now?"
"I have nothing until the end of the day so," I took a second to think it over, "I might grab some coffee and start researching for this assignment."
The three of us slowly started walking down the aisle towards the door. "Wow, Jia, you're such a reliable team member," Tae sighs in content, giving a playful pat on my back. When he was in such proximity and touched me, it was enough to make me feel shy. I just laughed, rambling to cover it up.
"Not a big deal, really! I'll just do a bit of it to make it easier for us later!"
Jimin playfully slapped Tae's hand away from me. The taller one mumbled a cute ouch in response before Jimin went on.
"Really? Isn't it too soon? Don't do too much of it until we meet, okay?" Jimin appears a bit worried, but it was only momentary.
"Okay. I'll only do a little, I promise."
Reassured, he let it slide. As we reached the hallway, we said our goodbyes. I head off campus and across the road to Starbucks. After grabbing an Iced Americano, I made my way to the library. I walked up the few steps and through the oversized double doors. It was grand, but in a modern way. I found myself a seat at an empty table in a quiet side section and read over assignment details. Only noticing an hour had passed when my phone buzzed from my pocket. On my front screen, I see the time and a newly received message.
It was a date request from the dating agency I signed with. It helped pay for university. I opened up the message, which had details of the guy who requested to hire me. Oh, it's for tonight!
I didn't have any prior plans for tonight. So, I replied saying I'd take the request. About five seconds later, I got another message with details of the meeting place. With a quick sigh, I leaned back in my chair and looked up at the high ceiling for a moment.
The same nervousness from this morning tangles in my stomach. This would be another first for me in one day. I knew there were services where you could hire girlfriends and such, although I never thought it would be something that I'd do. But desperate times call for desperate measures.
I needed to pay for university and this job paid fairly well. Much better than any other part-time job I could get at this point. My dad paid for my apartment for the first month. But, that time will pass quickly. The sad truth was that my parents couldn't afford it. Being an adult, having to worry about supporting yourself whilst also trying to figure out which direction to go in life... It was a struggle. I have to keep moving forward, though.
I let those thoughts disappear, only to be replaced with another.
What will tonight be like?