Can love ever ruin a relationship ?
When it's the main thing that is needed to build one?
Realizing that it can ruin something important to me , makes it scary.. So dear love, I've always known the sweet and soft side of you , but is there a side were you can be wretched and dark?
Tyler was holding my hand , while leaning in , he was so close that I needed to do something before it was too late .
At this moment the door opened revealing art , he was standing still , his hand didn't leave the door knob.
"Art" I say breathlessly as I stand up , my chest was tightening .
Tyler stands up beside me and holds my hand.
"Get out of my room" he slurs.
"When you let go of her hand " Art says , his eyes never leaving mine.
I let go of Tyler and approach art , but Tyler grabs my arm from moving forward.
"Bella ,he's not good for you and I don't want you to realize after it's too late " he begs .
"Tyler , Why do you keep saying that ? Please just stop" I say and hold my chest with my hand and breath in .
"Okay fine , remember that fight with jake?"
Tyler says letting me go.
"Yes" I say fearful.
"That douche made out with his girlfriend , he walked in , as they were doing it behind the bleachers "Tyler shouts.
"What are you talking about? ..Art? " I say facing him , waiting for him to answer.
"I-I don't remember , yes I fought with him but I can't remember why." he says uneasy.
"But I swear i would never do something like that , bella " Art pleads.
I stood quietly not knowing what to do , I know who art is ,what kind of person he is , but again why would jake lie about something like that ?
he even broke up with his girlfriend after his fight with art, and what's worse Tyler never lies to me , he's always honest even if the truth hurts.
"Bella?" Art says looking for my eyes .
"It's fine art , it's okay " I say troubled.
"What do you mean it's okay ? " Tyler rejects.
" let's go downstairs " Art declares and reaches for me but I back away.
He notices and backs away his hand .
"I just need to think , I'm sorry but you always say that you forget, and ...I-I need to sort things out first with Tyler and with myself.. I'll call you" I say unwillingly .
"Fine " he says after a long stare that was aching my heart .
He goes out of the room and slams the door behind him.
As soon as he left , I fell down to my knees since my legs were already giving away.
"Bella are you okay?" Tyler says worried as he pulls me up.
"I'm sorry but I need to go home " I say with my voice breaking.
"But .." he says and sits on the bed.
"We will continue this tomorrow okay? Just get some rest" I say and head out.
I leave the party ignoring the loud cheers and the people I was passing by. Everything was all distant and like a blur, i drive my car as fast as I could to reach home. I was overwhelmed .. I must admit Tyler and his feelings were a surprise for me , and to be honest I can't figure out how to handle it, it terrified me because my heart fell at my feet, I'm scared to lose him ..I didn't know what to do ,along with what happened today the facts are stating that art is guilty , but my heart says otherwise .
Even if , he did it , it's now in the past. So , what am I doing? Maybe you're scared he'd do the same with you too
My subconscious replied , and I shake it off .
I arrive home and I turn off the engines of the car , I get out and hurried back in the house.
I enter my face flushed , with tear stains as mind was all over the place.
No one was home , as I let all of my sorrows out to the walls that knew about them more than anyone else.
I go upstairs to my room and changed into my pjs and climbed in bed , I open the blue box and read another letter.
Hi,
In life it's easy To live by facts .
Searching for the suitable fact to prove if Something is right or wrong.
Knowing it's validated , authenticated and most of all , people give it credit .
But facts and the truth are two different things .
Facts are what we need to reason what's happening around us , for the sake of logic itself.
When it comes to truth , it's one's perspective and belief , so people will not praise or believe you , if you don't have evidence .
But they both depend on one another even though they're contrastive.
In order to know the truth you need to look for evidence (facts)
And in order to look for evidence you need to know what truth you'll believe in first .
I hope you follow what you believe in first ,even if all the facts are saying otherwise. Look for what proves that your truth is right.
Sincerely , J
I close the letter and sigh. I put the blue box back in its place and got in the covers .
It calmed me down like always, and I decided to look for the truth my heart believes in, but I needed a plan.
Ordinarily it's hard for me to come with a plan when something unexpected happens , and it can make me feel like a mess , so that's why when I feel like that, I organize my room, the whole house and wash everything, to feel at ease , it's like a therapy for me.
I pass out on my bed after cleaning up and drifted off to sleep finally.
The next day barges in uninvited waking me up , I got ready and made my way to the kitchen.
I find mom making breakfast.
"Goodmorning bella , how was Tyler and Lilly's party?" She says while flipping the pancakes .
"It was good .." I say and take a seat.
"So, I was thinking this winter break we should do something like go on a trip ?" Mom says as she puts the plate in front of me .
"Bella?" She says waving her hand in front of my eyes.
"Hmm? Yes ?" I say focusing back to reality.
"I was thinking that we should go on a trip on winter break how about that?"
"That'd be nice mom!" I say happily .
Mom never took a vacation since dad's funeral , she always worked and I never went anywhere during the holidays , so it's delightful to hear her say that .
Mom smiles back and sits next to me , to finish her breakfast , which was odd since she takes her breakfast with her to the hospital .
"Who are you? Since when do you eat breakfast with me?" I mumble while eating the pancake.
She laughs and shakes her head.
"You Don't like it? I can leave then" mom teases .
"No I love it mom" I say in comfort as I lay my head down on her shoulder and sigh heavily.
"I noticed the house was clean , aren't you going to tell me What's wrong ?" She says hugging me with her free arm.
"Nothing big i promise .. it's just that I found out that Tyler likes me"
"What tyler? Since when?" Mom exclaims.
"I don't know .. but he told me yesterday but then Art came in and.." I pause remembering what happened, remembering art's stare that made my heart throb so I tell her everything .
"Oh dear" she whispers.
And I stay quite for awhile.
"You like art right bella ?" Mom asks.
"Yes I do.. a lot " I say wiping a tear that fell.
"he didn't do you wrong bella so don't let any rumors or past mistakes scare you away" mom says .
"You have him now , and the person he is now is what matters , not whom he was in the past and not whom he will be in the future , what matters is now and what you decide to do" she continues while stroking my hair.
"And Tyler?"
"You should know the answer to that, you know him better than anyone else "
I hug mom and let out a breath that I needed to let out since yesterday.
"What would I do without you doctor " I murmur.
Mom laughs as she gives a kiss to my forehead and gets ready to leave .
"Leaving already?" I say .
"Yes dear and you should go now to school" mom says taking her bag.
"I knew it it's too good to be true , my heart oh the pain , the agony!" I say dramatically while closing my eyes.
"I can't believe after all this time that you've been in the hospital, you still don't know where your heart is" mom chuckles.
I open my eyes and I realized my hand was not on the left side.
"Damn you Jeremy " I mutter.
I arrive to school , And I take a breath out.
I look out of the window and removed the seatbelt to get out.
I walked through the hallways but I didn't see art anywhere, but I found Tyler and Lilly waiting for me by my locker.
As I approach them carefully.
Ok ok he's Tyler , he's ty bella same person nothing changed
"BELLA! Where have you been! you left without telling me yesterday! " Lilly shouts.
"I'm sorry , I wasn't feeling well " I say and look at Tyler discreetly.
"Fine , but you'll make it up for me" lilly says with a Frown.
"Bella , can we talk? " Tyler says scratching his head.
The bell rang and I took this as an opportunity.
"Later ty I have history now , but I'll call you ! Bye lil " I ramble while walking away.
I get in class and went to take a seat next to Lucas who was waving at me .
"Bella! How have you been ?" Lucas says cheerily.
"I've been good and you?"
"it's been a mess for me , yesterday I had to pick up art around 3 AM from a bar because he was so drunk , I guess something bad happened he doesn't get drunk easily " lucas says worried.
I blame myself and it made me feel awful.
"Uhm what about lee? , he can't stay home alone " I say anxiously.
"Oh no don't worry he was staying at his aunt "
I sigh and decided to ask Lucas about Jake and art's incident if he knew something about it.
"Uhm lucas do you remember Jake and art's fight?"
"Yeah what about it ?"
"Do you know why did they fight ?"
"Jake's girlfriend Lauren , liked art , so she confessed to him ,but he told her that he doesn't share the same feeling and they should stay friends, so she made a move on him and that's when Jake came in" he sighs.
"Oh my god " I gasp.
"Yeah and what's really nasty that she lied to Jake making him believe that art was the one who lured her " Lucas says angered.
"But why does everyone believe Jake not art? " I ask.
"You know Art , he doesn't care about what others think of him and besides Lauren asked him not to, I guess he respected their past friendship and agreed. " Lucas sighs.
"I think I made a huge mistake Lucas " I sigh heavily.
"Why what happened? "
"Goodmorning class please open your books on page 70 , today's topic is about the Cold War and its aftermath " the teacher declares as he walks in.
"I'll tell you later " I whisper to Lucas.
"Hey bella wait up" Lucas exclaims , but I leave before he reaches me.
As soon as the bell rang , I ran outside the class and ran through the hallway , but then suddenly I found myself on the ground.
"Ow " I say and look at the back of my hand , it was beat red.
"Oops sorry my bad " Bailey says and laughs with her friends.
"Ugh I don't have time for this " I mutter and get on my feet again.
I reach my car and drove off to art's place.
I knew I should have trusted him , and I feel so bad that I let him down.
I arrive to his place, and as predicted there were bodyguards and the gates were closed.
I get out of the car and approach the gate.
"can you please tell Arthur that I'm waiting here for him ?" I ask one of the guards as he turns around and press the intercom.
"Yes?" Art answers.
"There's a girl here saying that she wants to see you"
"Who?"
"Art please , can you open the gates so we can talk" I shout.
There was silence after what I said.
"Please leave miss " the guard says guiding me away from the gates.
I sigh and respected that he wanted some time away as I was leaving the sky started to rain.
I panicked and put my hands on top of my head , I breathe in and I breathe out.
But then the rain was no longer bothering me , I look up and there was an umbrella.
He was standing beside me, he was wearing his glasses and His hair was placed on his forehead , moreover he was wearing a black hoodie with black sweatpants.
"Are you okay?" He asks concerned.
He was waiting for me to speak.
I didn't know what to say first , or how should I explain that I was wrong.
"How are you?" I ask and bit my lip , damn it.
"Bella you came all the way here to ask me how I'm doing ?" he questions.
"No I mean I finally came up with a joke , so I wanted to tell you "
"remember.. I owe you one ? " I say desperately.
He half smiles and then notices my hand.
"What the hell happened to your hand?" He asks as he takes my hand.
"It's nothing , really I'm okay" I say.
He stares at my hand for awhile and then says
"Let's hear what happened first and then listen to your joke okay?" He insists as he guides me in.
Just as I was getting in , I wasn't worried about what will I say or what should I do to make it up for him , because somehow I knew what to do now just by seeing his smile even if it's half of it .
But what worried me was ..
how can I come up with a damn joke now ?