"Hey Denki!!" You called.
"What?!" He turned to look at you.
"Check this out!" You put your hands together. "KAREN NO JUTSU!"
POOF
"I WOULD LIKE TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER!"
"AH HA!" Denki laughed, spinning around and giving you finger guns. "YOU'VE ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD! YOU FOOL! I AM THE MANAGER!" The Karen screamed before folding like a tortilla to the floor, dozens of out-of-date coupons flying from her pockets.
"KAREN NO!!!" You screeched while Denki laughed maniacally. The others watched on in pure confusion.
"What are they..." Yaoyorozu trailed off.
"Don't ask," Sero said, shrugging. "They're both crazy."
"TAKE THIS, YOU FOUL BEETLE-HEADED FLAX WRENCH!" You took your mallet and smashed him into a pillar.
"YOOOOOOOOOOOO THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!" He yelled through his concussion.
"SHOCK ME DENKI!!!!"
"YOU MEAN 'DADDY'?!?!"
"I'M DADDY."
"NO I'M DADDY."
"I'M SORRY, WHO'S EATEN WHOSE ASS BEFORE?!?!?!"
Denki blinked before.
"SMASH ME DADDY!"
"DAMN FUCKIN RIGHT!!"
You ultra-turbo-super sonic-whack-a-moled Denki multiple meters into the ground.
"I'm rather concerned at this point," Jirou commented, watching you two.
"It's like a match made in heaven," Kirishima added. You then noticed both Midoriya and Aoyama further away from the others.
"YO! I'LL BE BACK! SAVE THAT PHAT, DELECTABLE, JUICY, THROBBING, ABSOLUTELY SCRUMPTIOUS BUSSY FOR ME."
"YOU GOT IT DADDY!" Denki sparkled. You silently appeared behind Midoriya, hanging upside down in the air.
"... watcha talkin about?"
"AAAAAAGHGHGHGHAAAAGHGA!!!!!" He yelled, "Y/N! Y-you're floating!!" You smiled widely.
"HELL YEAH I AM BBY! If I imagine myself floating or flying, I actually will!!" You exclaimed.
"Amazing!!"
"HELL YEAH I AM--I mean...--IT IS!!"
~
"Due to personal reasons, I will be passing away."
"EH??!?! WHY?!?!"
"... do you want me to be honest or lie."
"... honest?" Momo replied carefully.
"I don't wanna help with the School Festival."
"What? Why not?" Sato asked. Your mood, compared to a little while ago, was desolate.
"Realiti disappeared amongst the chaos, so I don't have to intern anymore. Besides, big celebrations like this without drugs or orgies, I'm out."
"You can be the bouncer and throw people out," Denki said with a smirk. You shined brighter than a diamond (luv u RiRi).
"PERFECT!!" You clapped your hands loudly. "TIME TO THROW OUT SOME GROPERS WOO!!" You grabbed Mineta and yote him through the window.
"... uh, Y/n?" Sero said nervously, "We meant at the festival."
"Oh..."
"..."
"..."
"Well, it's good to start early."
~
The next few days passed rather uneventful for you. Everyone was figuring out their roles in the festival--specifically, the rave. It was the weekend. While everyone was practicing you were in your room getting high. You know, the normal.
"уоц'vё CёятДїиlу CнДиGёd."
You waved the weed-induced voice inside your head away.
"Well, when you get arrested dozens of times, charged with multiple felonies, kill a couple people, and join an evil organization, it does something to you."
"уоц ₴ёём Glоомїёя тнДи ц₴цДl. ї₴ ₴омётнїиG ои уоця мїиd?"
"Nothing's on my mind usually. Besides like... illegal shit."
"окДу щёll тнДт'₴ тяцё."
You hummed, waving away the smoke.
"уоця fяїёиd₴ ₴ёём lїкё тнёу'яё нДvїиG fци."
"Perhaps," you replied, "It's easy to excite them with things like this."
"Диd? уоц'яё иот ёжCїтёd?"
You violently blew the water out of the bong.
"I never saw the point of things like these," you replied, eyes burning from not blinking for ten minutes. You were beginning to lose your vision. "Sure, they're fun, but if you want me to be honest, stabbing inmates with a spoon is more fun."
"pяётту ₴цяё тнДт'₴ уоця номїCїdДl тёиdёиCїё₴ ₴pёДкїиG."
"Maybe."
~
"Hey, Y/n?" Denki asked you once you actually re-emerged from your cave. "Can you sing?"
"Sing?" You repeated, "Anyone can sing. It's a matter of if they sound good."
"I've heard you sing Deepthroat by the Cupcakke in the shower before," Mineta pointed.
"D-deep--?! What a vulgar title," Yaoyorozu said. You laughed.
"Not my fault it's catchy! Also..." Your gaze suddenly darkened. "Why are you listening to me shower?"
"GOTTA GO--"
"NO WAY!!!" You took your mallet and smashed him into the ground. Sero, Denki, and Ashido held up 10 signs while Kirishima clapped and whistled from the back.
"I thought Jirou was going to sing?" You said, wiping away the invisible sweat on your forehead.
"Well yeah, but you've been the least active in all of this," Kirishima said, "We were wondering if you felt left out." You blinked at him.
"Is this... is this a joke, or?"
"Joke?" Denki repeated, seemingly offended. "We would never joke about something like that."
"That's it, we're fucking right now." You grabbed Denki and hauled his ass to your room.
"..."
"... ?"
"KYAAAAAA~! HARDER DADDY!!!"
"YEAH, YOU LIKE THAT, DON'T YOU, YOU ELECTRIC SLUT?!?!"
"SO MUCH DADDY~!"
"TAKE IT YOU CORD MASOCHIST!"
"YES ZADDY~!"
~
The night before the festival, some of you were staying awake well into the night. Y'all were already yote from the gym by Hound(or whatever his name was).
"Hey, Y/n, aren't you excited?" Denki asked, flopping himself over the back of the couch to look at you. You shrugged.
"I've never been to an outing like that, so I wouldn't know."
"Eh? Really?" Mineta asked, "What outing have you been to?"
"Depends. Do you count bingo night at prison an outing?"
"Heh heh..." The (r̶a̶p̶e̶)grape chuckled nervously. You stood up from the couch and walked over to where Aoyama and Midoriya were. On the table in front of them were ropes, harnesses, and gloves.
"Daaaaamn bro," you said, leaning over Midoriya's shoulder. "Y'all are into some kinky shit, aren't ya?" Midoriya turned fifty shades of red.
"Y-Y/N-CHAN!" He cried indignantly.
"What?" You inquired, "Ya girl gets around. HEY DENKI!"
"YES DADDY?!"
"WANNA BONE NEXT FEMBOY FRIDAY?!"
"TAKE ME DOWN TO THE FEMBOY HOOTERS WHERE THE MEN ARE PRETTY AND THE BOYS HAVE COOTERS~"
"All rise for our national anthem."
You and Denki rose while placing your hands on your hearts. You took a deep breath in.
"... OPEN UP THE SAFE BITCHES GOT A LOT TO SAY."
"ER~!🤪"
"PUSSY IN YOUR FACE THAT'LL PUTCHA IN YOUR PLACE."
"BOOM~!😙"
"SEVEN LETTERS ON THE PLATE, FUCK YOU WHEN I BREAK."
"BITCH~!😎"
The others looked on in complete and utter confusion and your antics.
"... anyone feel left out?" Kirishima asked. Everyone nodded in agreement.
"Hey, Y/n?" Midoriya called, "Wanna come with me to the store tomorrow morning?"
"Of course, my lil' baby kinkster."
"D-DON'T CALL ME THAT!!"
"Says the dude who plays with rope, harnesses, and gloves."
"T-THAT'S DIFFERENT!!! /////0///0/////"
"No it aint. You a bby and I'll teach you... the ropes... wink wonk."
"Did she just say wink wonk out loud?" Mineta whispered to Kirishima who nodded.
"She did."
"Alright." You stretched out your back, cracking it in half. Midoriya screeched. "I'm going to turn in. I'll meet you at the store, Midoriya." You waved before beginning to walk back to your room.
Ja ne!
{Ruby Red}