KNOCK KNOCK!!
"Hey there, Kinksters! It's me, the lovable, huggable Deadpool!"
"Now, since all of you fucksprinkles seemed to ignore the teaser in the last chapter, I'm here to drop a bomb—"
"NOPE!!"
"This is MY book, you unicorn fucker!! I'M doing the announcement!"
Deadpool said something from under the mallet. You removed the mallet from his face.
"They ignored you last time, Weedboy."
"Well I'll make sure they pay attention this time."
"And if they don't?"
"I'll fuck their dad and become their stepmom."
"... aren't you 16?"
"Age of consent in Japan is 13 so SUCK MY DICK!"
Deadpool hopped out of the hole you put him in and wrapped and arm around your shoulder.
"Hey, all you fuckknuckles! Do my little Kinkster a favor and go check out this link!"
"It's not porn, I promise," he whispered into the camera.
"GODDAMMIT WADE THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY JOB!!" You yelled, bringing out a giant pair of scissors.
"WOAH HOLD ON, THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE DOING!"
"YOU'LL BE FINE!! THEY'RE SAFETY SCISSORS AFTER ALL."
You cut him in half.
"Don't worry Reader, he'll grow back."
"𝐹𝓊𝒸𝓀 𝓎𝑜𝓊!" He yelled from the back.
"OH SHUT UP WADE!!" You took the mallet and smashed him into the ground multiple times. Once you were done, you wiped your brow.
"Whew! That was a lot of work." You faced the screen that the Reader is looking at right now. "But besides that cancer cell."
"𝒻𝓊𝒸𝓀 𝓎𝑜𝓊!"
"Either copy paste the link OR go to Ruby's Wattpad page and check go tap it on her Conversations board!"
"'𝔚𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔦𝔰 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔰 𝔩𝔦𝔫𝔨?' I hear you ask?" You pulled out a black board.
"BEHOLD, YOU DUMB FUCKS!"
"IT'S CLOTHES!!"
You slammed your hands on the desk that suddenly appeared.
"GO LOOK AT THAT SHIT!!"
Ja ne!
{Ruby Red}