AN: Sorry been a long day... here is the next chapter...
Kevin knows, does Nick and Joe find out about the secret that Alex is hiding from them... and how are they going to react to it all?
~*~*~*~*~
Chapter 4
Joe and his brothers walked into their dressing room as Joe was smiling because it was another great night, surprising Alex on stage, and then his sister getting the biggest gifts ever. Her very first Multi-Platinum World Wide plaque and then Derek’s pops the question. Nothing else could make it better.
Joe then looks at Kevin and Nick, as they were really quiet watching each other while they were cleaning up before they left.
“Okay, did you two get mind reading superpowers or something because I want it too,” Joe said trying to make them smile. “Come on. It’s Alex’s birthday. We gave her the greatest gifts ever. She’s got her very first M.P. plaque; she’s getting married to a really great guy… hopefully the right guy this time. We should be happy.”
“We are happy for her, but we are also disappointed in her,” Kevin said getting mad.
Nick nods, “I just can’t fucking believe it,” he told Kevin as he takes his shirt off, and throws it in a corner so hard that he almost ripped his pump off.
“Neither can I Nick. Neither can I,” Kevin shook his head in disappointment while also changing clothes.
Joe looks at his brothers with a very confused look. “What are you two talking about?” he asked.
“Joe, did you not notice the way she was acting on stage tonight with us?” Nick asked trying not to lose his temper.
“No she seemed normal… a little jumpy, but nothing major,” Joe replied.
“God Joe, are you fucking blind? She was only jumpy when we came close to her wrists…” Kevin yelled losing his temper, “She is cutting again!”
Joe’s eyes widen, “What? She promised us that she wouldn’t cut... ever!”
“She cut both wrists,” Nick said. “There is white underneath the wristbands that she wears.”
Joe plopped down onto the couch in their room too shocked to say anything. “Have you noticed them before? Why hadn’t we seen them before?”
“I don’t recall anything the last few days,” Nick told them. “So I know that it’s not done daily.”
“The tape seemed fresh,” Kevin noted, “So she had to have done it sometime today before the show.”
Nick nodded in agreement. “I don’t know about you Kev. But she knows that I saw them when she and I were singing.”
“I saw them while she was hugging Joe during the ‘birthday video’ we made for her,” Kevin told Nick.
“Then why didn’t I spot them tonight? Because if you two did, why not me?”
“I don’t know. She has worn the wristbands before at each show to wipe the sweat off,” Nick told him. “So I’m more worried of how long has it been going on, and we just noticed them tonight?”
Joe stands up, “Then, let’s go talk to her about it.” He was now ready to snap.
“We’re right there with ya brother,” Kevin told him ready to go.
“Wait. We better finish cleaning up before mom and dad comes and finds us not ready,” Nick says stopping them.
They agree and finish getting ready to leave.
~*~*~*~
After Alex and Dani clean up the dressing room really well, Alex and Dani were just done closing the final case when there was a huge banging on the door to the dressing room that Alex and Dani jump.
“It’s them,” Alex said scared looking at her wrists that were now with different wristbands on that were purple and blue colored.
“Alex open this door NOW!” Joe yelled.
“Just a minute,” she said trying to calm down.
“No not a minute… NOW!” Joe yelled losing his temper that he was so desperately trying to control.
Alex looks at Dani for some help, but Dani shakes her head.
“I told you that this was going to happen,” she told her sadly.
Alex slowly walked over to the door. “I’ll open the door, but you have to calm down before I do.”
“Fine we’re calm,” Nick said straining to keep his voice even.
Alex looks at Dani, “Do you believe them?”
Dani shakes her head no.
“Sorry, Dani and I don’t believe you. Until you three calm your cute ass down, I’m not opening this door.”
“Dani open this door,” Kevin said calmly to his wife through the door.
Alex looks at Dani worried. She didn’t want them to have to replace another door again, that she slowly then turns the lock, walks over toward Dani, and hides behind her trying not to cry.
They barge into the room and look around the room to see Dani with Alex hiding behind her as Nick shuts the door behind them.
“Danielle move,” Kevin told her.
“No, don’t,” Alex told her.
“I’m not moving,” Danielle told her husband.
Joe points at Alex, “You!” Joe yelled, “You promised me Alex. You promised, and then you go and break that promise. How stupid are you!” Joe demands.
Alex starts crying, “I didn’t mean to.” She tells them, “I thought that you all forgot my birthday that I felt like I shouldn’t exist.” She then falls to the floor sitting down and covers her face.
“Joseph, calm down!” Dani yelled at him. “That’s why she asked you to calm down before you came in here.”
“But she promise us Dani!” Nick told her.
“Okay, first off, this isn’t the second time she has done this. This is the third cut, both wrists,” Dani told him.
“Third!” they asked in shock.
“When did she do it the second time?” Joe asked surprised.
“When dad called her worthless that day before the first concert,” Dani told him.
Nick and Kevin look at each other in shock remembering that day two months ago.
“But that was business dad. He always wants the show to be perfect,” Kevin said.
“She could’ve came to us if she needed to talk, we’ve always told her that,” Nick added.
Alex didn’t want to move, but just sat there hearing her family yell at each other about her.
“But, we didn’t forget that today was her birthday,” Joe told Dani.
“Did any one of you tell her happy birthday this morning or today at all?” Dani asked. “Even give her a hug?”
They all shake their head no in response.
“That’s why she did it,” Dani told them, and reaches down to help Alex stand up.
After Alex gets the nerve, she slowly takes the wristbands off to show the bandages around her wrists. The brothers inhale as they stare at the wide bandages and tape around her wrists.
“They are the right size to hide under your wristbands,” Joe told her softly.
“How bad are they?” Kevin asked in shock.
Alex tries to get it together without saying anything, she peels back the tape, and once she got both wrists uncovered, they saw an ‘X’ on both wrists.
“Alex those need to get looked at; they look really bad,” Nick panicked grabbing her hands and pulling them closer to him for a better look.
“I’ve already cleaned them up after I did the cutting,” she told him not being able to look at either one of her brothers’ brown or hazel eyes. “I have the stuff to clean them up.” She stares at her cuts, “I was going to replace the bandages tonight.”
“Where is the scar for the 2nd cut you did?” Kevin asked looking at her wrists over Nick’s shoulders.
“I reopened the first cut that I did,” she said sadly.
“Why four cuts?” Joe asked studying them.
“It was going to be seven, but I couldn’t do it,” she said just letting the tears fall.
All three brothers swore under their breath.
“For each one of us?” Nick asked in a whisper.
Alex nods, “I reopened the first one, and I pictured you three while doing the other three, but I couldn’t get myself to do the other three cuts.”
“So these are meant for us,” Kevin said.
Alex nods sadly.
There was a knock on the door, and they turn to see Denise looking inside with Derek.
“Oh, there you kids are,” she smiled. “Alex, you have company out here, and they would like to go out to party.”
Alex quickly looks at her brothers and Dani.
“Um, we were just so excited about the engagement that we had to look at the ring more,” Dani smiled.
“Oh, is everyone ready then?” she asked.
“Yeah,” Alex said. “Um, I was just going to ask the boys personally about a wedding idea, and if they were going to back out like they did last time.”
“Okay,” Denise said with a smile.
“I’ll see you in a few then,” Derek said looking at Alex with a smile.
She smiles, “Okay.”
The two leave the room and Alex sighs going over to sit down on the couch. “I’m in deep shit.”
“It’s okay,” Nick told her going over and sits down beside. “We’ll help you clean them up, just wear the wristbands again, and we’ll go out.”
Alex finally looks into Nick’s brown eyes, “What if they see the tape?” she asked.
“Then we’ll tell them,” Joe told her going over.
“Alex, you can’t hide this from Derek,” Kevin told her and kneels down on the floor facing her. “Mom and dad are going to find out sooner or later. David and Mitchel you know are going to flip out when they hear about this.”
She nods as Dani went to open up a case, and grabs a small first-aide kit that Alex had in there to clean up her wrists or if anything else happened on tour. Denise suggested it for all of them to have one.
“Just that we don’t tell mom and dad,” Nick told them, “but I agree, Alex you have to tell Derek. David and Mitchel too.”
Alex nods as Dani hands the kit to Nick who opens it up, and hands Kevin the stuff to start cleaning it again.
Alex leans her head back on the couch and flinches when the peroxide hits it.
“Are you sure you cleaned it?” Kevin asked.
Alex nods trying not to cry because of the pain. “Just taking the tape off and then everyone grabbing my wrists, I’m sure they’ve opened up some.”
She feels Kevin taking care of her wrists as she fells Nick brushes her hair back with his fingers with his right hand and his left hand resting on her lower arm to hold it still for Kevin to clean it. She even felt Joe come sit down on the other side of her and does the same thing that Nick was doing.
Alex then said something that they didn’t expect to hear her say. “I’m sorry.”
They look at each other not sure what to say.
“Just promise us that you will not do it again,” Joe told her.
Alex nods and looks over at Joe and stares into his brown eyes, “I promise.”
Joe looks deep into her eyes and felt that she meant it, but deep down inside he didn’t feel like he should believe her. “Okay,” he said.
“Promise me that if you are down or you just need to talk, I don’t care if we are busy or not, or what time it is, and we’re in bed, you come talk to us, please?” Kevin asked her as he looks up at her and deep into their matching hazel eyes.
Alex nods, and squeezes Kevin’s hands that were holding hers, “I promise.”
At least it was a start.
~*~*~*~
After Kevin got Alex’s wrists cleaned up, and they all hugged her one last time, they headed out the door and saw everyone was there waiting.
“Hey,” Mitchel said smiling. “You were great out there on stage birthday girl,” he said going over and hugs her.
“Thanks,” she said hugging back.
“You and Nick were really into that song,” David said going over to hug her too.
“Thanks,” she smiled hugging him too.
“So, where too. Birthday girl’s choice,” Derek said going over to hug her and kiss her.
She hugs and kisses back, and then looks at him. “Denny’s.”
Every laughs, “Why there?” he asked.
“Well, it is late, and it’s open 24/7.”
“Okay then, Denny’s it is,” Derek said with a smile.
“Well, dad and I are going back to the hotel and taking Frankie with us,” Denise told the kids.
“Aw,” Frankie said. “I want to go too.”
Alex goes over to hug her little brother, “Tell you what. We’ll spend tomorrow together okay?”
“Okay,” he smiled.
“Alex…” Paul said concerned.
“It’ll be games and stuff, nothing else dad,” she told him.
“We’re riding the plane in the morning, and get to the venue, so they can play there. Nothing is going on,” Kevin told his dad.
“Okay, just making sure,” Paul told them. “Okay, not out late too long please.”
“Yes sir,” they said together.
After everyone said goodnight, Paul, Denise, and Frankie left.
“So, who’s going with who?” David asked.
“Why don’t Alex, Dani, and I go with Derek, while Joe and Nick go with you two,” Kevin told them.
“Okay,” David smiled.
“We’ll see you there,” Mitchel smiled as the boys walk off.
“Nick, your satchel,” Alex reminded him.
“Oh, right,” he said and went back into the boys’ dressing room to get it and left.
Alex and Derek take hands as Kevin and Dani follow behind.
“So what have you been up to?” Alex asked Derek.
“Just dancing,” he smiled.
“How is the family?”
“Doing great,” he smiled. “Oh, everyone from the show called me to tell you happy birthday, and congratulations if we did get engaged.”
She laughs, “They knew about the proposal before you even did it?”
“They knew that that I was going to ask you.”
“Makes sense.”
They soon got outside and the other four were already gone.
Kevin smiled, “We’ll leave you two alone for a bit.”
Alex knew why he was doing this. She had to tell Derek, and now.
“Here, go ahead and get in the car,” Derek said handing him the keys.
Kevin and Dani smile as Kevin took the keys and walks toward his car that wasn’t very far.
“Does Kevin know something that I don’t?” Derek asked.
Alex sighs, “Um, ya.” She looks up at Derek. “We need to talk.”
“Is it the ring? Is it to small… to big?”
“No,” she said quickly and smiles, “It’s perfect. Just that…” she sighs, and removes her wristbands to show the white bandages. “Back in January, I cut myself when Kevin turned down my offer of being my manager.”
“Oh Alex,” Derek sighed studying the bandages.
“I promised my brothers that I wouldn’t cut again, but I did. Back when it was before our first concert in March. Dad called me names that I just cut open my original cut. No one knew about it.” She looks at her wrists, “But then again, this morning after breakfast, no one told me happy birthday, so I decided to cut, this time it wasn’t just one cut. It was four. I was going to cut one for each family member, but I just got to do three more, one for Joe, Kevin, and Nick.” She doesn’t dare look at Derek. “I didn’t think they would see them after I covered them up. But sadly, tonight on stage, Kevin and Nick spotted them, and Danielle was in my dressing room telling me that she did backstage before I went on, and saw Kevin and Nick’s reaction onstage too from the screen, and when Joe grabbed my wrist, that I reacted by nursing my hand when he let go. I didn’t know that it was on the screen, until Dani told me.” She sighs, “Sadly Joe was the first one that saw me do it the first time, and then finds out from Kevin and Nick after the show.”
“Why are you doing this to yourself Alex?” Derek asked.
“It just hurt me when Kevin didn’t want to be my manager. I wanted him to. I trusted him. I knew that he would be great at it. But when I saw his face, I knew his answer would be no, and it ripped my heart out. I thought that he would love to be a part of it, but after seeing his point of view and that he would be too busy to do the job, I just felt like that if I cut my wrist, the pain would go away.”
“We’ll get through this together. I’m here for you.” He touches her check and makes her look up at him, “Just promise that you won’t do it again, even if you feel that no one loves you, because I love you. You’re family loves you. We all do.” Derek hugs her tight, but still concerned.
“I promise...” Alex says hugging him back feeling better that her fiancé now knew the truth. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Derek says kissing Alex.
They then decide to head to the car and get to Denny’s.
~*~*~*~*~
AN: So, now poor Derek, David, and Mitchel don't know about Alex... how are they going to react when they find out next??? Even someone ELSE finds out about it too...
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