Well that wasn't how I expected things to go. I figured that I would be the one to storm out in a fit, that he would be the one that needed to apologise. He does, he should have told me, but I'm not completely blameless in this either.
He's totally right; I still think that he will leave me at a moments notice. But it's not anything that he is doing or saying, it's all in my head. I think. I still don't feel like I deserve him, that I deserve this happiness or adventure that he brings into my life, so it would make sense for him to have someone else in his life. Except he doesn't, I believe him when he says it.
But fuck I hate that bitch. Whoever she is, she's a bitch. I imagine her being some leggy blonde who has a long history with Harry, maybe back in the old days when he was less uptight and formal. The vision in my mind of a younger Harry running around New York with his friends makes me ache for all the stories he's never told me, they must be incredible.
He just needs to cool off, I should let him, but I also want to take off my makeup. I venture quietly up the stairs and find the door to his bedroom is still wide open, probably not the one he's stormed into. Nevertheless, I still creep up to the doorway and pop my head in just inside the door frame to check that the coast is clear. When I determine that it is, I quickly unzip my dress, hang it back up in the closet and slip into the Fleetwood Mac shirt that Harry always allows me to use when I'm here. Even though I've worn it on a number of occasions, I can still get a small hint of his cologne on the collar. It was my loyal companion while he was in New York, I'd allow my mind to trick me into thinking he was beside me using this shirt. And now to think he's in god knows what room of this massive apartment, thinking that I think he's a liar.
I shake my head as I head to the bathroom to wash my face, I have to find him and talk to him about this. Once my face is washed and pat dry, I set off to try and find him.
There are quite a few spare rooms in the apartment, ones I've never even bothered to go into before. But all the doors that I pass are open, and none have Harry in them. I round the corridor and find the light in his study is on, and the door is open. If he did slam it shut, maybe he opened it back up again? Maybe he doesn't want to shut me out after all.
Sure enough as I approach the door way, Harry is standing inside hovering over his desk. He's taken off his jacket and tie, leaving him in just his white button up and black trousers. A small lamp on the table lights up a series of papers he appears to be examining. He's working, at nearly midnight. I lean against the open door frame and watch him for a moment. His brows are furrowed as he flips through the papers, they look like they're sketches, probably the new Shanghai hotel. Eventually his gaze hovers over to me, and lands first on my face, then on my T-shirt. Relief floods through me as a soft smile spreads across his face.
"You do love that shirt don't you" his voice is soft, but endearing. I shrug my shoulders and play with the hem of the shirt, that hangs around the middle of my thighs.
"It's comfy" I respond. I'm not going to be a creep and tell him I like that his scent lingers on the collar, that's weird, and we need less weird in this conversation. There's a slight awkwardness that hangs between us after that, it's no longer tense, I think we are done being mad. I know I am.
"I'm sorry" I let out a soft sigh and lean further against the door frame. "It just freaked me out I guess"
"Why?" Harry asks genuinely, sitting himself down on his large leather seat behind the desk. He raises his hand to beckon me into the room, I gladly enter, opting to sit myself on the edge of his desk around his side, my bare leg resting just a few inches away from his knee.
"I don't know. You said when you first got back that you might want to move back to New York one day. Hearing that there is a girl in New York that you met up with while you were there...it just set something off in my head, I don't know" I shrug my shoulders as I try to explain my previous anger. He listens to me and nods his head, letting out a quiet sigh as his head tilts back slightly onto the head rest of the chair.
"I get that. I have more of a past than you do" he replies. He's right, I literally have no romantic past before he entered into my world. Whereas for him, who knows how many notches on his bed post he has?
"So yeah, there is a girl in New York. A very obnoxious and self cantered girl who I have absolutely zero interest in being with. There are girls in other places too, who I also have no interest in being with. But there is only one you, and I'm holding onto you" He leans his forearms on the arm rest of his chair and leans his body slightly forwards as he speaks, resulting in my stomach twisting in tight knots. In a world full of no doubt beautiful women from his past, I'm the only one he sees. Now that's something.
"I should have told you that I saw her. I guess I didn't want you to freak out" he says with a wry smile. I tilt my head to the side, allowing a slight grin to cross my lips.
"And how did that work out for you?" My question drips with sarcasm.
"Not too well" A small sparkle reaches his eyes as he lets out a slight chuckle.
"And to think" I laugh slightly. "I thought this night was going to be drama free, that I would be able to redeem myself from the first horrible dinner you took me to"
"Hey hey, you did really good tonight. And we had a good night, literally right until the very end. I'm still calling tonight a win" Harry boasts with a slight sense of pride and a nod of his head. His hair has become a bit of an unruly mess, with the amount of ruffling his hand through it, it's much fluffier than he normally allows it to be.
I nod my head, moving my leg to nudge his knee ever so slightly. "So, we're okay?" I ask with a slight smile and a sense of hope. Harry nods his head, taking my hand in his and gently pulling me towards him. I manage to manoeuvre myself into a comfortable position sitting on his lap, the hem of the shirt lifting up ever so slightly.
"We're good baby" he tells me with a slight grin. I slide my arms around his neck and sit on his lap, looking into the face of the man who has become so important to me in such a short amount of time. In all of my wildest thoughts, I never thought that we would ever get here, to a place where we were both trying so hard to make this thing work between us. Gone are the contracts, rules and regulations; just two people who care about each other trying to make it all work.
"Hey, where's you're mind gone bub?" Harry rubs the side of my thigh, bringing my attention back to him. I shake my head, sputtering out a slight giggle.
"Do you think we're crazy? For trying so hard to make this thing work between us? We've been thrown so many obstacles, it's like the universe might be trying to tell us something" Harry shifts slightly in his chair, keeping his palms resting on both of my outer thighs to hold me steady. He shakes his head with a wide grin.
"Fuck the universe. I know a good deal when I see one" I raise an eyebrow in response, allowing a wide grin to cross my lips as well. Forever a businessman.
"Aren't I a bit of a risky investment?" I ask, sliding my hands around from his neck to rest on his shoulders.
"The bigger the risk, the bigger the reward" He smirks as he answers. He sees me as someone of value, even when I don't see it myself.
"Or the bigger the loss" I point out.
"I don't intend on losing" his response is quick and confident. If I didn't think that he was in it for the long haul before, I certainly think so now. I lean forward and press my lips against mine, pulling my body closer to his. After all of this fighting; I want to be close to him.
The moment his tongue flicks against mine, something ignites itself deep in my belly. My hips roll against his, causing the grip he has on my thighs to tighten ever so slightly, and slide up my body underneath the hem of the T-shirt. His arms travel upwards until I take over, sliding my hands off of his neck and placing them under my shirt, peeling it off and tossing it behind me on the study floor.
His head dips immediately down onto my chest and soon his lips are wrapped around one of my nipples. My hips continue to roll instinctively against his until I'm suddenly thrust up onto the desk, my back making contact with the papers lying scattered across it. I watch breathlessly as Harry quickly slides my panties down my legs before his head dips down to kiss my inner thighs.
As his mouth goes higher, my body begins to squirm in anticipation. My muffled moans fill the room as I try and contain my excitement. I don't do a very good job of it, as I can feel Harry's smirk against my skin the closer he gets to the apex of my thighs.
"So eager for me aren't you baby?" He pures softly, lifting his head up to watch me. I'm about to agree when he slides a finger deep inside of me and curling it. A loud moan escapes my lips and all I can do is nod my head and tip it back, it hangs off the edge of the desk.
"Good girl, you like my tongue too don't you?" He murmurs, sliding in another finger before beginning to pump them quickly inside of me.
"Yes, I do" I manage to puff out my response, holding back a moan. I try in vain to keep my hips still, but my body has a mind of its own when Harry's in control. His tongue flicks against my clit, I lift up my head and see Harry's curls in between my thighs. Just above his head I can see a large bookshelf, with titles that are beginning to blur the more he flicks his tongue. I'm soon seeing stars, aching to feel him more than I already am. I reach my hand down and wrap a fistful of his curls in my hand, tugging at them just as he likes it.
"I want you- please, Harry I want you..." I moan out, desperately trying to get his attention as it seems to be rather invested in his current activities.
"You want my cock baby?" His eyes flicker up to watch me, his lips slipping off my clit as he asks. I nod my head quickly as I make eye contact with him. His movements are swift. Soon he's standing, picking me up from my position on the desk and carrying me down the hall towards the bedroom. I wrap my legs around him, still experiencing quite the high and wanting to stay upright throughout the journey. I trail kisses down his neck and start to quickly undo the buttons on his shirt. He looks so hot in just his white button up, but his tanned tattooed skin underneath is so much better.
I barely even notice that we are in the bedroom until Harry throws me backwards onto the bed and begins to hastily take off his belt. I lie back on the bed, watching him with a grin and biting my lip. He smirks widely as he slides his pants and boxers down his legs.
"You've become quite the dirty girl haven't you baby" His voice is low and husky, it only adds to my excitement. I nod my head in agreement as he slowly climbs onto the bed and makes his way up to me.
"My dirty girl" Harry confirms as he reaches me, placing his hands on my hips and sweeping me up, placing me on-top of his hips as he lies his back on the bed. He seems to like me on top, and though it's still relatively new to me I think I like it too.
"Yours" I nod my head and bite my lip, he lifts up my hips and helps me slide myself down onto him. I slowly slide myself all the way down, my head tilting backwards at the immensely full feeling. Then I begin to move, slow at first, building up a rhythm. I place my hands on Harry's stomach, just above his butterfly tattoo and balance myself on him, beginning to grind my hips faster against him. The resounding groan that falls from Harry's lips eggs me on, I go faster, loving the view of him groaning in pleasure beneath me. I feel invigorated, powerful, in control.
"Such a good girl, you ride my cock so good baby" he groans, one his hands sliding up my body to paw at my breast. My body flutters under his praise, my aching lips curling up into a wide smile as my head rips upwards towards the ceiling.
"Feels so good. Oh fuck!" I exclaim as Harry's thumb begins to roughly rub against my sensitive clit. My head tips forwards again, tossing my hair over my shoulders as I continue to rock my body against his. A wide smirk crossed his lips as he hears my profanity followed by a series of moans.
It doesn't take long for that familiar tightening to begin to build. I squeeze my eyes shut and release a loud moan as I explode around him, leaning my body forward and gripping his shoulders. The movement of my hips begin to slow as I ride out my high, but Harry's not done yet. My body is flipped over once more as Harry begins to pound roughly and quickly into me, pushing for my high to last me longer. It's never been this good, it's complete euphoria.
"Oh fuck that's good" I let out a moan, opening my eyes to watch as Harry slides in and out of me at a merciless pace. I wrap my legs around him and place my heels against his back, drawing his body even closer to mine. My hands slide upwards into his hair to tug at the damp curls near the bottom of his neck.
"Only I can make you feel like this. Just me, no one else can have you this way. Only I can make you feel this good" His voice sounds like a prayer in my current state, his words washing over me. I believe them, whole heartedly I do. I would never want anyone else on top of me; this sometimes frustrating, often beguiling, forever charming man has complete ownership over my body and I don't intend on wanting it back.
"Only you" I moan out in agreement, my nails clawing up his back as the tightening sensation returns. I can feel Harry's pace quicken slightly, I know he must be close too. He lifts his head up to place a sloppy kiss against my lips before trailing them down my neck, softly biting as he goes. The feeling of his teeth grazing my skin pushes me over the edge once more as I explode to pieces around him, a loud moan and a few slow thrusts later Harry follows. His hot, sweaty body somewhat collapses ontop of me as we both try and catch our breath, still wrapped around one another.
We lay still for a minute or two, our breathing synching up, my hands absentmindedly curling through his hair. "I left my shirt in the study" I pout as I whisper into his ear. His breathy laugh shakes my shoulder before he places a kiss to it.
"Will one of my other ones do for the night?" He asks with a cheeky grin, lifting his head slightly to peer down at me.
"I suppose" I give him a faux pout before kissing him gently. He smiles and slides his body off the bed, strolling into his closet to pick out a new shirt for me. God knows why I'm still somewhat uncomfortable being naked around him, it's not just him really it's myself as well. I crawl up the bed and slide my naked body under the covers before he returns with a grey T-shirt in his hand, having slid on a pair of boxers himself. He tosses the T-shirt to me before he climbs onto the bed, and I'm pleased that this one smells like him too, and it fits me like a glove.
"How did that feel baby?" He asks, a cheeky grin plastered on his face as he lies back on the pillows to watch me. I turn my body slightly, leaving my back to the view and pull my hair out of the collar of the shirt.
"It was pretty amazing" I grin shyly as he sits up, kissing my cheek and trailing his lips down my neck and back up again until they reach my ear.
"Nice pre-birthday present for you" he hotly whispers into my ear. I gasp as he lies back down, a wicked grin once again taking up a large majority of his face.
"How did you know it was my birthday!?" I demand to know, I definitely didn't tell him that it was my birthday tomorrow. I was intending on letting it slip by without any notice, I never do anything for my birthday anyway.
"You do realise that before I met you I was literally given a complete file full of all of your information right? Your birthday was in there, I noted it down" His smirk grows wider. "Why didn't you tell me?" His hand is placed on my knee, drawing delicate circles into the skin.
"I don't like my birthday, I never really celebrated it when I was younger so why celebrate it now?" I shrug my shoulders. He tilts his head to the side and keeps tracing the circles into my skin.
"Because people love you and care about you that's why, I was surprised that you and heather haven't made plans" he states matter of factly.
"How do you know I haven't made plans with heather?" I ask him, narrowing my eyes. His lips turn up, smirk city.
"Because I talked to her" My eyes widen in response to that.
"You talked to Heather? When? How long have you two been talking?" I quickly sputter, urgent for answers. Heather is a major blabbermouth, how could she not have mentioned that she and Harry have been in contact. Harry laughs at my panic, little bastard.
"A couple of weeks. I asked her if she had plans with you, because I didn't want to interfere if she did, but she said that you guys hadn't made plans. We talk all the time now, we are basically best friends" He's very happy with himself, obviously that last part is a joke. I can imagine him trying to just get her to answer one simple question and Heather becoming very excited and wanting to talk to him about me for hours. Oh god.
"What else did she say? Oh god what has she told you about me?" I shake his arm, my demands being met with laughter.
"Relax missy, she didn't divulge any little secrets about you. Though she did give me advice" he pushes some of his hair back, his eyes sparkling with joy. I'm still anxious about him making a big deal about my birthday, but I can see it's something that he wants to do, so I can't be a bad sport about it.
"What kind of advice?" I ask curiously. I know I go to Heather with all sorts of problems and she always has some awesome advice for me. Harry sighs happily and sits up slightly in the bed.
"She said that you are one of the best people she has ever known, and that I am damn lucky to have you. And if I ever hurt you, I can consider myself a dead man" I feel the heat rise in my cheeks as he reiterates her advice. Of course Heather makes me out to be better than I am, she's all about that girl power confidence stuff that I've never been able to pull out of myself.
"She's right, which is why I got the whole day off of work tomorrow. Literally, if anybody tries to contact me tomorrow they will be fired, and they know it. You're going to have a fucking special day, that's an order" He jokingly demands, causing me to let out a small giggle in response. Harry's hand slides onto my hip to pull me closer towards him.
"I swear to god if you've arranged some fucking surprise party with a bunch of random people-"
"Nope, I know you waaayyy better than to do that. You know how selfish I am, I'm keeping you all to myself tomorrow" he grins up at me before he corrects himself.
"Actually that's not entirely true; we are having lunch with my mum, Gemma and Charlie. I told them it was your birthday and they insisted on seeing us, I couldn't figure out an excuse to get out of it I'm sorry" he explains, but I shake my head with a wide grin.
"No don't apologise, I love that, that will be really nice" Even though I've only hung out with them for a very short amount of time, I really care about Harry's family. His mum is an incredibly sweet woman and his sister is so freaking nice, plus Charlie is just too dang cute for words.
"And that's all I want. Just lunch with them. No gifts, no surprises" I warn him with a wide smile.
"Yeah that ain't happening. I have a lot of things planned" he's so cheeky, and so proud of himself.
"Harry!" I whine. "You know I don't do well with all the gifts and attention"
"It's your birthday, you are getting spoiled and treated like a queen, suck it up and deal with it" He says, sitting upright completely to kiss me on the cheek before pulling me down into the pile of pillows. I smile against his chest as I rest my face on it.
"Harry..." I protest again, somewhat quieter as he reaches his arm over, shutting off the small lamp illuminating the room and wrapping his arms around me.
"Night Baby" he presses several kisses into my hair before whispering "See you on your birthday" I shove his chest slightly and pout as he chuckles softly.
"You suck" I say quietly, resting my head on his shoulder and letting out a sigh of defeat.
"Sweet dreams bub" he mumbles into my forehead as I close my eyes, suddenly feeling exhausted. God knows what Harry has planned for tomorrow, I'm frightened just thinking about it. I don't want him to get me expensive things are take me to fancy places and do fancy people stuff. Some people like that but I don't, I just want to hang out with him, and his family now that they know it's my birthday. Damn the Angel Club and their thorough record policy. I drift off to sleep eventually, being lulled by the soft rise and fall of Harry's chest, my stomach in knots in preparation for tomorrow.