Hey guys! So I'm sorry this is a late update but it really wasn't my fault. I was going to update on Sunday but my stupid internet wouldn't work so I wrote it in my notepad on my laptop and then transferred it and I didn't realize how long it was until I pasted it so yeah, really long chapter! 1637 words to be exact and that's not including this authors note so enjoy and please vote/comment or whatever. It really means a lot so thank you :) x *omg the way Liam looks at Niall in the gif and so fetus omg this is what's killing me agggh*
Liam's P.O.V
I can't believe Zayn is gay. I never would've imagined that in a million years. I thought he was the biggest homophobe there ever was. And Harry...In a way, I pity him even though I know deep down he doesn't deserve my pity. I should be angry, I should shout and hate him but what would be the point in that? Hating him wouldn't change anything. It would be a waste of emotion, time and space. I've never been one to hate though. Do I even hate anyone? I listen to my head as it screams at me.
"Your dad".
He is a person who deserves all the hate in the world but I just can't give him any. He's still my blood as much as it disturbs me to think of all he did to me. My head might hate him but I know deep down, my heart still cares. And it always will. There is someone though I do hate, he deserves it. He is so useless, worthless. Not even his own family loves him. He's a disgrace. He's me. I hate myself and I know deep down I always will. No matter how many " I love you's" or "you're beautiful" 's I hear from Niall, they will never change how I feel for myself.
This feeling of hatred, it stays. And all I can do is try my best to ignore the voices in my head who beg for me to punish myself or kill myself. I know I'll never do that. The thought of hurting the one boy I could never hurt is too much. I might not love myself but I know Niall does. It's crazy that he does and I don't know why he chose me to love, there are many beautiful people out there but he picked me. I shake my head from my thoughts as I feel a arm wrap around my shoulder. I jump a bit, not used to people making physical contact with me. Well, the only physical contact I used to be used to was the abusing from Zayn and his gang but all that's changed. Hopefully.
"Sorry to scare you Li, you coming class? I bet Mr Horan's waiting for you" Zayn says, winking at me. I look down and shake my head when I feel heat rise to my cheeks. I really need to control that. "Uhm yeah sure, wait a minute" I say, turning back to my locker and grabbing my books, locking my locker after. Zayn smiles at me and I return it. He isn't going to hurt you Liam, don't be scared of him. When we get to the classroom, Niall looks up and smiles. He looks behind me to see if anyone is coming and when he sees it's only Zayn, he comes over and quickly hugs me and pecks my lips. Again, heat rises to my cheeks. God dammit.
He sadly moves from my desk when he sees other students coming in. I can still smell the mint of him however on my shirt which makes me smile. I love the smell of Niall, it's so comforting in a weird way. It makes me feel like...home. And not the abusive, un loved house I used to live in, no. Niall is my home now and that makes me so happy. I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket so I look around before taking it out and hiding it under the table. I know Niall wouldn't take it off me really but I just have to act as if im afraid he would.
From : Nialler Babe <3
"Your blush is adorable babe :* x"
I look up at him but he is busy typing on his computer. I smirk as I hit the reply button.
From : Li Li baby <3
"Ssh your distracting me in class! Wouldn't want to get the teacher mad, would we? ;) x"
I look up and smirk when I see him look at his phone and laugh. I'm so happy I can make such a beautiful person laugh. He looks over at me quickly before looking around the whole class. Smooth Niall.
From : Nialler Babe <3
" I think you do want to get the teacher mad, still texting me? tut tut ;) focus love! x"
I shake my head at the text, a smile on my face. He's such a idiot, he's the one who texted me first. I stare at the last word before replying quickly.
From: Li Li baby <3
"Excuse me mister but it was you who texted me first ;) hard to focus when my teacher is such a sex bomb ;) x"
I hit reply, putting my phone back and looking up. I watch Niall's reaction as he reads my text and see his cheeks go a light pink before he looks away quickly, putting his phone away and standing up. I smirk to myself, mentally high fiving myself. Yes I'm weird, who cares. He looks over at me for a spilt second before coughing to get our attention. He fails however as everyone keeps talking and I laugh quietly. His lips go into a straight line and I know he's trying hard not to laugh with me.
"Class, that's enough. Please listen, I won't be talking for long, just need to give you the work and then you can talk all you's want, okay? Only if you listen now for 5 minutes." Niall says, getting everyone's attention. I sit up straighter and stare at Niall. He waits a few minutes, waiting until the room is dead silent before speaking again. "Thank you. Now as you may know, before the incident in school we talked about doing a project, yeah?" Niall asks but many people shake their heads. I remember though, I sort of remember everything that Niall says, important or not.
"Okay well the project is going to be about what we have been doing in class which is this book." Niall says, holding up "The Fault In Our Stars". The class mumbles "yeah's" and some even groans. I roll my eyes at some of the people in here and I notice Niall does the same straight after me, making me laugh quietly. He looks over at me, smiling. "So we need to get into groups, I'm not picking you can pick whoever you want but if I see no progress in your project, I will have to pair you with someone else. You can go and sit beside them now to discuss your projects as I'm giving you this class to organize the project. That's all, you's can start now" Niall says, sitting back down at his computer.
I see him get his phone out so I know I will be receiving a message anytime soon from him. "Hey, want to be partners?" Zayn asks, standing beside my desk, scaring the life out of me. I didn't know he was even there. "Yeah sure Zayn, sit down" I say, smiling. Just as Zayn sits, I feel my phone vibrate so I take it out and hide it under my desk. I see Zayn look from me to Niall and he laughs quietly. I shake my head at him before opening the text from Niall.
From : Nialler Babe <3
"That had to be the most awkward few mins of my life! You idiot laughing, making me laugh too! Sex bomb, eh? ;) Don't think he'd like hearing that haha ;) x"
I look over at him before shaking my head, disappointingly. He gives me a confused look before looking back at his computer. He called me an idiot! How dare he, I'm only allowed to call him that! "Shit sorry Zayn for completely ignoring you" I say as I see Zayn look at me weirdly. "No it's cool, I'll just write ideas and we'll look through them after yeah?" Zayn says, smiling. I nod at him before replying to Niall.
From : Li Li baby <3
"Hey! Only I'm allowed to call you an idiot! :( Forget it, you're not a sex bomb, your a very mean person :( x"
I hit reply and put my phone back and look up at Niall. His reaction is priceless, it goes from happy to shocked and then..sadness? Why is he sad? Does he think I'm serious? Shit. I feel my phone vibrate before I even have a chance to text him sorry.
From Nialler Babe <3
"I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean it that way, I was only messing. Please don't hate me :'( x"
My face drops when I see the crying face and I look up to see Niall, staring out the window biting his lip. Oh Liam, what have you done to the poor boy now? I look away from him and quickly reply to him.
From : Li Li baby <3
"No babe, I wasn't giving out to you! I know you were only messing, so was I ! I could never hate you and you know that :)
I love you Niall <3 x"
I hit reply and watch Niall turn away from the window and back to his phone. He litterally smiles from ear to ear at the text which gives me strange butterflies and makes my heart sped up a million times faster. I feel my phone vibrate so I open it quickly and read his message.
From Nialler Babe <3
"Oh...I feel dumb and I'm supposed to be a teacher? haha okay baby, I'm happy your okay and I love you too baby, forever <3 x"
I feel the heat rise to my cheeks when I read the last word. "Forever". I hope he means it because I sure know I'll love him forever.