"There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it." - George Bernard Shaw
20.
Vivian
Lost.
I was mentally and physically lost.
Mentally, I felt lost in their lies. Running alone in search of my location might have allowed me to think for a while, but even after that, there was only one constant thought in my mind - betrayal. It slowly dawned on me how much of a fool I had been, a fool who was happily living in her own reality - a reality which was a dream, a mere fantasy.
Physically, I was also unable to guide myself towards the human territory. I had no idea as to which direction to go, there were no familiar sights to guide me out. Not knowing the way out from another pack's territory was one of the drawbacks of staying in your own pack and not venturing to other places for your entire life.
For the first time in my life, I found myself completely and utterly, alone.
The East territory was somewhere I've never been to. My father always went to pack meetings held at the other three packs with Zack since he was to become the Alpha of our pack after him. Father never asked me to join and I was equally uninterested to visit other packs. But to think of it now, I can understand why father never invited me to tag along - he did not want me to meet Ethan and recognise our mate bond. However, Zack, since he was oblivious to everything that was happening around him, did stress upon the importance of knowing the way in and out of each territory. But being the headstrong woman I am, I always disregarded his opinion.
"You are a stubborn woman, Viv. One day this will cost you and you'll think about the day when your wonderful brother told you to listen to him, but as always Her Highness thought she was way above her brother's opinion." My brother was right. And his words came back to bite me in the ass because right now, Her Highness was utterly and undeinably lost.
I always focused on staying home in order to put maximum efforts for the security and strengthening of our own pack. It did not matter to me what other packs did, as long as they abided by the peace treaty. However, standing at at the edge of nowhere, completely lost, made me realise that Zack was right after all.
Knowledge is power.
The silence was echoing in my ears. The only source of sound was the constant thumping of my heart. It was racing at a tremendous speed, threatening to escape at any given second. I was also extremely tired of running, even attempting to keep my eyes open was a struggle. My brain wanted to give in but I knew I couldn't rest when I was being chased.
The silver moon was high in the sky, the only source of light in the darkness. The moonlight shone down, a diffuse glow, illuminating the never-ending river that I was following since I left Josh's house. The serene, deep blue river flowed with perfect consistency, carrying all the debris that fell in from above slowly downstream. My intital plan was to keep following the river, in hopes of finding the territory inhabited by the humans. Every wolf knew that humans were the closest to the East pack, but I had been racing alongside the river for more than an hour and it seems to keep stretching on.
Goddess, how big is the East territory?
I raised my snout in the air, trying my best to sniff out the stench of humans. They had a distinct, overpowering smell which is why we wolves always kept our distance from them.
However, it was difficult to concentrate when thousands of thoughts flooded my mind. There were so many unanswered questions, answers which only he could give me. Not only that, it was also getting tiring to keep the wall up to block the constant mind-links trying to penetrate my mind. It was always the same, a crushing pain just on one side of his head that came and went in a pattern. It felt as if every person of my pack was trying to contact me. Blocking them wasn't difficult, however, it was taking all my power to block out of my father, who was also my Alpha. Blocking an Alpha took extreme effort, and was impossible for almost everyone living in the pack. The pain felt like someone was trying to stab my skull with a knife. I leant my head against a nearby tree and squeezed my eyes tightly shut, willing the pain to go away.
During childhood, I used to run away whenever someone lied to me. The first time was when my mother told me my pet rabbit ran away. But in reality, Zack, who had recently shifted, ate him. I was eight years old then. I returned home after a few hours when Zack found me and apologised by giving me another rabbit.
The next time was when I was sixteen years old and father refused to let me tag along with Zack by saying he was 'sick' and needed someone to manage the pack while Zack was away. This time I didn't retun home for the entire day. Upon locating me, they found another thing with me. My power of resistance. Throughout the day, I was able to block my father, a.k.a the Alpha, from my mind. This came as a shock to my parent, as not even the Luna can block the Alpha. When they asked how I did it, I gave them a simple answer - I disconnected from the world.
Using what I practiced throughout the years of running away, I tried to resist my father and ignore the exruciating pain rooted deep inside of head until the rest of the world became detached.
Was it right of me to leave admist such confusion? Should I give them time to explain? Would it be worth it?
No, Vivian. You cannot be marked. Concentrate.
That's when I felt it. A sudden change in the environment. The leaves rustled on the trees behind me. It couldn't be Ethan, could it? My senses focused on the crunching of the leaves that followed soon after. A dark silhouette walked out of the shadows. Brown eyes.
It was Tyler, dressed in plain, black shorts which means he just shifted.
He crossed his arms, tilted his head and gave me a smile.
"Hiya, Bluff. Fancy meeting you here."
Amongst all the pain, a smile broke upon my face and before I knew it, my legs were heading towards him.
We both met midway in the form of a hug. His hands rubbed against my back, providing comfort I desperately needed.
"I am so tired, Tyler. I can't find my way out of this stupid forest and I cannot rest since I am being chased," I muttered against his chest.
"I got you, don't worry." He grabbed me by the arms and pulled me away so he could look me in the eyes. "I have covered your tracks which would buy us some time, a trick a specific Alpha-blooded female taught me."
I smiled, "She must be smart."
"I don't know. But she surely thinks she is."
I punched his shoulder and he let out a laugh.
"But you still need to leave. He is an Alpha, the wolf is in control. It is merely a matter of time he finds what is happening."
I moved a few steps back when another chain of intense pain began to hammer against my brain. I let out an anguished scream, and clawed at my hair to ease it.
"What's wrong?"
"Alpha...," another tiny scream, "trying to mind-link." It was difficult to speak a proper sentence since I had my entire focus on putting a strong wall between my Alpha and I.
When the pain subsided, I stood up straight again.
"Sorry Vivian, I can't help you with the mind-link. But here, I brought you some clothes."
He picked up a bag from the side. I never noticed he had brought one with him.
"Wear them and it will mask your scent. The humans live just by the end of the river. If you want to go for a shortcut, you can choose to swim but that just defeats the purpose of these clothes so I advise you to take the long way. This way you won't get wet either." He took out the clothes and handed them to me.
A white tank top, black leather jacket and black jeans.
"Change, I'll cover for you."
Not wasting any more time, I ran behind a tree, took my own bag off my shoulders and quickly shifted into the new ones. Once done, I rewore the bag on my shoulders and headed back to Tyler.
"I wish I could take you to the human territory myself but they'll soon notice that I am missing," Tyler started once he saw me approaching. "We have also already wasted a lot of time. You need to leave, now Vivian," Tyler continued, worry laced in his voice.
"Thank you for everything. You and Josh both helped me more than you know. One day, I'll do my best to repay you both." I leaned forward and gave him a farewell hug.
"Take your time, you need to process everything that has happened, Vivian. When things calm down a bit, everyone will understand. Maybe even being away from you would knock some sense in that jerk's mind. But you need to promise me that you wont stay away for long. This can't go for long. Zack knows everything, and he was absolutely livid. It is a surprise that the academy is still standing, he managed to destroy almost everything."
I winced. We both had our flaws. One could never control his anger and one always ran away whenever someone lied to her.
Tyler continued, "I talked to him after he almost beat the shit out Ethan."
I moved back, it was safe to say I was surprised. "He attacked Ethan?"
Tyler acknowledged my question by simply nodding once, "I told him you needed space, I didn't mention your plan since you asked us not too but I told him to let you go and give you space. At first he couldnt understand why you had to leave - he has quite the sense of humor; said he will lock you inside and guard your door and if Ethan ever tried to show up 'I would rip him apart'. I don't doubt that. I think he'd do that even with you not being there. Your going away has affected him a lot which is why... promise me you'll come back soon. This could be your repayment to us. Promise me."
Even though a thousand thoughts flooded my mind at that moment, I didn't hesitate to give my answer, "I promise."
He strerched his arm and brought our heads together, "Until next time, Bluff." With a final kiss to my forehead, he was on his way back to where he came from.
-----
It took me some time to reach the end of the river in my human form. Previously, I shifted in and out of my wolf and human form. But now, since my choices were limited, the journey got distinctively tougher. The river seemed to stretch on and on but then the overcoming smell of humans wafted from the other side of the river. I spotted an old wooden bridge nearby, the structure which grants entry to the lands of human.
The sight of the bridge and every step that I took towards it gave me a new sense of motivation.
"We're here." I said out loud to no one in particular when I finally reached the corner of the bridge.
As I took my first steps to climb the bridge, a dusty, wooden board captured my attention. Using my hands, I wiped the dirt which had held the sign behind it captive.
A wolf. It was a picture of a plain black wolf. His muzzle curled back to expose pearl-white fangs. Ears pointing forward. The bottom of the board was engraved, the writing had faded in some places but I knew exactly what it said.
"RECEPTUM"
It was Latin for 'retreat'. A warning. A warning for us wolves to go back where we came from. We were not allowed to venture in the territory of humans. It was not only the law but also extremely dangerous. The only way to go to the human side was through seeking permission from the Lycans which was rarely ever granted. And breaking this law was punishable by death or exile.
Should I do it?
I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and...
...crossed the bridge.
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A/N: Death sentence? Exile? Puhh-leasse. Vivian doesn't give a damn. ;)
Sorry for the late update - writer's block is a b i t c h. I wrote this chapter three times, everytime it did not seem up to the mark for me. I'm not impressed with even this version but it is better than the previous ones. Promise you next update would be better and quicker.
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