Just a heads up to you all. I'm Sick so there will be shower updates. Good thing i stocked up on chapters a couple days ago :p
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**48h later **
-Ariana's POV-
I stand in my home recording studio and press the start button. Knowing myself I need to just sing it all out. When it seems like there is nothing I can do music always helps me pull trough. And this song I've been working on for the last 48h tells everything I feel. It touches every nerve
(A/N in this story I'm going to pretend its Ariana's song and she wrote it)
"Closed off from love, I didn't need the pain Once or twice was enough and it was all in vain Time starts to pass, before you know it you're frozen
But something happened for the very first time with you My heart melted to the ground, found something true And everyone's looking 'round, thinking I'm going crazy
But I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you They try to pull me away but they don't know the truth My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing
You cut me open and I, Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open
Trying hard not to hear but they talk so loud Their piercing sounds fill my ears, try to fill me with doubt Yet I know that the goal is to keep me from falling
But nothing's greater than the rush that comes with your embrace And in this world of loneliness I see your face Yet everyone around me thinks that I'm going crazy Maybe, maybe
But I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you They try to pull me away, but they don't know the truth My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing
You cut me open and I Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open
And it's draining all of me Oh; they find it hard to believe I'll be wearing these scars for everyone to see
I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you They try to pull me away but they don't know the truth My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing
You cut me open and I Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open and I Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open and I Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love"
As the song fades out and I press the stop record button tears streamed down my face. Everything hits me. Its like everything gets smacked right in your face.
I've been hiding from everyone for two days. I littarly looked myself in the studio. Good thing its both food and something to drink in here. It's also a bathroom so it isn't much else I need.
People have probably caught on that I'm hiding in her by now. And if I unlock the door it's for sure going to come people rushing in.
But I'm not going to open the door. Cause I don't want to face anyone.
I know I will haft to come out tomorrow cause its 48hours until the VMA's. i have all day tomorrow to rehearse
No commitments to be anywhere until tomorrow, I've already recorded my album secret listening concert earlier this week. All I want to do is be in here alone.
Taking a couple deep breaths I belt out into the mic some new lyrics that I've been thinking about
"Just when I felt like giving up on us You turned around and gave me one last touch That made everything feel better And even then my eyes got wetter So confused when I asked ask you if you love me But I don't wanna seem so weak Maybe I've been California dreaming" I belt out, in pure soprano notes, clear as the wind.
Tears where still flowing down my face from earlier, and now more where joining them. Its like to much all is hitting me and to let it all out I just scream...
Over and over again I just scream out in pain and anger and every emotion there is. Letting it all out.
People where knocking fanatic on the door "ARIANA. ARIANA. ARIANA ARE YOU OKAY?" "DID SOMETHING HAPPEN?" "ARIANA CAN YOU HEAR ME?" I
I couldn't make out who it was all I heard is that it is multiple people. I'm sure they have tried everything to open the door, but it can only be unlocked from the inside.
My little body collapse together on the floor, to tired to stand up anymore. It continues to cry, scream and sob all together. And the banging and almost screaming coming from outside the door continue as well.
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Omg I was almost sobbing myself writing this.
But what is wrong with Ariana? She for sure wouldn't be like that over nothing.
Is there something deeper going on?
Twitter: Christinaasland
Instagram: thetvdgirl
-Xoxo Christina