Vanessa Pov-
"What do you mean?" I asked, still shocked with what Jay had said. I was his problem?
"If I hadn't have gotten involved with you, I wouldn't feel like this!" He snapped in frustration, sitting himself up. I jumped back against the head board, random images of when Jay hit Nathan flashed into my head and I began to feel scared of him.
"You've ruined everything me!'' He began, his facial expression much too calm and relaxed for the words flowing from his mouth. "You left and I was fine, I built up a stable relationship, I was never fully happy but it was working for me! But then you came back, for Nathan. It breaks me to see you two so happy!" He shook his head slowly. ''I wish I'd never found out, I'd much rather have been with you, been happy even if you were with Nathan behind my back. That would be so much better than this.'' He groaned.
"I don't know where this is coming from!" I snapped, throwing my hands into my hair "What about Harley? And Phoebe? Jay what are you going about?!'' I questioned, dramatically sighing towards the end.
"They are just distractions from you.'' Jay shrugged. "It was always you!" I felt a tear roll down my face as he spoke. "Why are you springing this on me now?" I hissed, but my voice came out in nothing more than a whimper as the tears fell down my cheeks.
"Because, I never stopped loving you and it's breaking me inside to see you happy with someone else! I love Nathan and I know he doesn't mean too, but its like you're purposely rubbing it in my face! I want you Vanessa, I want you so bad, but I can't!" It took me a while to process Jay's words in as he moved forwards and brushed away my tears, his own cheeks damp.
"Jay I can't-"
"I know, you love Nathan more than you'll ever love me.'' He laughed coldly. "But we could try again?" Jay leaned forwards slowly and my body shut down. I felt his breath against my lips and slowly he moved forwards until his lips hit mine, caressing them slowly with his own whilst I stayed still, in shock. Tears streamed down my face when my body came back to life. Grabbing hold of the back of Jay's head I pulled him closer towards me, deepening the kiss. But then Nathan's face flashed in my head. Everything he'd been through for me and I couldn't do this to him. No matter how much I wanted Jay.
"Jay." I whimpered pushing him away. "I understand.'' Jay mumbled his head dropping as he returned to lying down beside me.
"I tried to hate you, but the more I tried to, the more I loved you.'' He whispered into the darkness. "Did you ever love me?" I kept hold of my breath, thinking over the question. I knew I had to find a way to help Jay move on and although the word that left my lips, it was for the best. But it wasn't how I felt at all.
"No." Jay's expression stayed the same as I said it, and he pulled his covers back over his head, signalling that I should leave. Wiping my eyes with the sleeve of my jumper, I headed to the door and turned to face where he was laying.
"You know, you'll find someone who will love you more than I ever could, someone that will respect you and treat you like you're their world and when you do, you'll look back and think how stupid you were wasting your time on me. I'm not worth it and I do love you Jay, just not in the way you want me too." I placed my hand on the door handle and pulled it down slowly. "You've got to move on.'' I pushed the handle down when Jay sat up again.
"Wait!" He called, standing up and he moved over towards me. Letting go of the handle, Jay walked over towards me until he was inches away from where I was stood. ''You do love me?" He whispered, bending down to look into my eyes. I nodded my head sharply, not trusting my voice.
"But you have to move on Jay.'' I reached up confidently and held his face between my hands and he nodded his head slowly. "I mean it, you've got to fight to push these stupid emotions you're feeling aside and find someone who loves you back as much as you love them!" A small smile spread onto Jay's face. Removing my hands from his face, he entwined them into his and put his forehead softly against mine.
"Promise me one thing?" He whispered shyly. I nodded my head, signalling him to continue. "No matter what happens this time, you'll stay. You won't run away and I won't lose you..."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, you'll stay no matter what and won't lose contact with any of us ever again. That way I won't have to go through the pain of losing you, then the months of getting over it just to crash back down the square one when you come back. I don't want to hurt anymore over you, Vanessa." He frowned.
"I promise." I smiled, understanding exactly where he was coming from. "And I want you to promise that you won't forget about me and we'll always be friends." He sniggered, pulling his head away from mine. "How can I forget about someone with curly hair like this?" I laughed running my hand through fluffly curls. "And I'm sure we'll be friends Jay." He smiled and nodded his head, his mouth falling into his normal lopsided smile and I finally felt as though we were both moving on.
"Maybe even best friends, ay?" "Maybe." I laughed wrapping my arms around his neck to give him a hug. "Thank you, thank you so much for making me see sense." He whispered, rubbing the small of my back slowly. "I'm a girl, I'm perfectly intact with my emotions and understand how other people feel." I joked, pushing him away and he laughed, his infectious laugh.
"Come on, your flat mates are worried about you." I smiled pulling open the door. "And if you don't eat soon you'll be a stick!" The light from the hallway filled Jay's room and he laughed, jumping over his bed, he moved something underneath it and pulled out a box full of crips and crappy food.
"I was prepared." He winked, pushing it back under.
Max was pacing back and forth in the living room, when he caught my eye, I smiled broadly and his lips curved up into a grin. Jogging down the corridor towards me as Jay moved back around his bed, dodging the crap on his floor. Seeing Jay moving Max ran into his room and pulled him into a hug.
"Don't fucking scare us like that again Bird!" Max snapped as he pulled away.
"Thank you." Jay smiled over Max's head.
I nodded my head, feeling happy that everything was working out. Max spun around and gave me a weak smile, miming thank you with his lips before turning back to talk to Jay. I felt as if it was my queue to leave and left the room and went straight down the corridor towards the living room to where Emma was still sitting.
"I'm sorry Nessa." She whispered standing up immediately. "It's fine Em!" I grinned and she ran over, pulling me into a huge hug. "Do you want to do something tomorrow?" Emma pulled away and looked at me in shock.
"Tomorrow's your last day here Nessa, you're not going to see Nathan for ages after!"
"I'll see him tonight and tomorrow night and then we go Friday morning." I shrugged. "He'll understand!"
"Are you sure?" Emma smiled warily. I nodded my head and she wrapped her arms back around my neck. "I'll come for you in the morning." She grinned pulling away. "You're not coming back tonight?" I asked, confused. "Urm, Max has made plans..." She cooed and I grinned widely.
"Not too much drink alright?" She nodded her head and returned to sitting down, calling goodbye to Jay and Max, I left the flat and snook across the hallway back to Nathan's.
Pushing the door open, feeling extremely happy, I came into the living room to see Nathan sprawled out across the sofa, his eyes closed and his breathing shallow as he slept. Smiling to myself, I grabbed a blanket off the back of the chair and placed it on him carefully. But something grabbed me by my waist. And before I could react I felt myself being pulled towards Nathan and soon I was lying with him on the sofa beneath the blanket.
"Everything alright?" He mumbled, still not opening his eyes.
"Everything's perfect." I smiled.
*
"Jesus Emma, you can shop!" I laughed as we collapsed into Nathan's flat. "Next time can we just go for a movie and something to eat please?!" I begged, throwing down my shopping bags onto the chair.
We'd spent the whole day around London shopping, Emma had made me go in almost every shop. And although I loved spending time with her, I was absolutely knackered whilst Emma could have gone another three or so hours in town.
"Where's the bathroom? Where is the bathroom?!" Emma called frantically, pushing past me. "Next to our room!" I called after her, she kicked the door open and slammed it shut behind her as Nathan emerged from his bedroom.
"What's up with her?" He asked, confused and gesturing towards the bathroom door.
"Probably ate something." I shrugged as he moved into the living room, raising his eyebrows up at the bags that covered the chairs. "They are not mine!" I laughed. "Well, I hope you got yourself something!" Nathan frowned, winding his arms around my waist. I leant up and kissed his lips quickly and then moved out of his grip towards the bags. Grabbing the one out off all ten that was mine, I handed it over to Nathan.
He digged through it, pulling out certain items of clothing and smiling.
"You should wear this tonight!" He grinned holding up a little sparkly black dress I'd brought. "Tonight?" I asked as he pulled it up against my body so he could see what it looked like. "You look great! Wear it for me, please?" He grinned, taking it back and putting it into the bag. "And the boys want us all to go out together, cause it's your last night here!" I smiled towards Nathan and Emma came stumbling out of the bathroom.
"I need to lie down." She groaned, stumbling into our bedroom. "I think all these hangovers have caught up on her." I laughed, grabbing the bags from the sofa "Help us with these, Nath?" I grinned and he took the ones from my hand, trailing them into mine and Emma's shared room.
"You not coming tonight then Emma?" Nathan asked, dumping the bags onto my bed. "Course I'm coming!" She laughed into her pillow. "I just need to lie down for a bit." She added.
"Well, you two need to get ready then!" Nathan laughed. "We've got to be going at half seven and seeing as you spent the day shopping, it's now..." He pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the time. "Quarter too, so I'll leave you two be!"
Nathan left the room and Emma rolled over. "What's wrong?" I asked confused, sitting down onto my bed. "I reckon it was that bacon sandwich I had in that small cafe!" She groaned sitting up. "But, I feel fine now!" "You sure?" I smiled, getting my dress out of the bag. "Positive." She smiled, moving over towards her bags.
*
"Aw, look at you two." Nathan cooed as both me and Emma stepped into the living room. "You both look nice for once!" He joked. "Cheeky git!" I gasped, stepping forwards with my hand raised, but he caught my wrist and pulled me against his body, lowering his head down to mine to kiss my lips passionately. "I was joking." He winked. "You look beautiful." Winding his arm around my back, he turned to face Emma and smiled "You too Em!"
"Cheers fringe." She grinned heading towards the door. "You two coming or?" We both nodded our heads and followed her.
"About time, the taxi's been outside for nearly half an hour!" Max laughed as Nathan locked the flat door. "Where's Siva and Tom?" I questioned, looking around for them. "Tom has gone to see Kelsey and Seev and Nareesha are meeting us there!" Max smiled. "He spent the night at hers last night Nessa." Nathan chuckled, taking his hand in mine. "I never even noticed!" I laughed, feeling quite bad. "Well, you did get back from sorting Emma out and then fell asleep on me..." Nathan chuckled deeply.
"Sorting me out?" Emma asked, confused. I gave her a look as if to say shut up and she widened her eyes. "Oh yeah, urm thanks for that!" Jay let out a chuckled from behind her, I didn't even notice he was leaning casually against the wall.
"Look, are we going or not?" I ask, breaking the awkwardness. "Come on then." Max smiled, he put his arm around Emma's waist and started walking outside with her, Jay followed them and we followed him.
Clambering into the taxi that was outside, the journey there was quiet. Max and Emma were mumbling to each other, her practically on his lap. Whilst Jay had somehow ended up in the seat between me and Nathan.
"Eyar! There's Seev!" Max suddenly smiled as we pulled up outside a club. "Cheers mate." He smiled, throwing a few ten pound notes over the front seat. The driver grumbled as we stepped out and pulled away.
"Heya!" Siva smiled, pulling us all into a hug one by one. "We going inside?" Everyone nodded and walked inside, Nathan keeping hold of my hand securely as we walked into the room.
The night when by quickly and I was soon tipsy, Nathan stayed beside me at all times, every time some random bloke came near me, he'd grab hold of me and pull me against his body. In a way, I thought it was extremely cute. At some point Jay had left with a short blonde, a smile plastered all over his face, Siva had left with Nareesha, the club being to manic for them both to handle. And Emma and Max had been all over each other all night on the sofa's in the corner.
"I'm going to miss you!" Nathan shouted over the music as we headed over to the bar. "I'll text you everyday!" I slurred, pulling his lips to mine. "Steady on." Nathan laugh, lifting me up onto a bar stool.
"I don't want to leave you!" I pouted and Nathan placed his hands onto my hips. "We have all night yet!" He grinned, signalling over my head for the bartender.
*
"My head hurts." I frowned, leaning against the car door. "You can sleep on the way back." Nathan smiled, rubbing his thumb across my cheek. I turned around to see Emma and Max standing in almost the same way me and Nathan were.
"They've really hit it off, eh?" Nathan chuckled, reading my mind. "I'll get all the deets on the way back." I winked. "You better text me them!" He laughed, placing his finger underneath my chin, bringing it up towards his face. I saw Jay leaning against the wall so I put my finger over Nathan's lips to stop him.
"One minute." I whispered, brushing past him to go and see Jay. Making my way over towards him, he noticed and stood up straight. I instantly wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug, taking him by surprise as his body tensed before he relaxed. "Thank you." He whispered in my ear. "Anytime." I smiled, kissing his cheek as I pulled away. "Keep an eye on him for me?" I asked, meaning Nathan and Jay nodded his head, his curls flopping around frantically. "See you soon Bird!" I smiled walking back towards Nathan.
"What was that about?" Nathan frowned as I approached him. "Just saying bye!" I laughed. "Well, you interrupted me!" He pouted. I let out a low breathy laugh and leant up onto my tiptoes, crashing his lips against mine he kissed me with more passion than he ever had before. Backing me against the car door, his hands found home on my hips and he pulled them closer towards his body.
"Ahem!" Emma coughed from behind us. Sighing, Nathan pulled away and pecked my lips softly.
"Text me when you're home." He whispered stepping away. "Miss you already." I winked, climbing into the car as Emma did the same.
And I did.
*So yeah, here is part 15!:)
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