Dear Diary,
I miss him.. I have tried dating apps and I have tried letting myself go... But I don't want anything.to do with anyone so long as out isn't him.
I try to get everything we said and did out of my head... I can't... I miss him every single day.. Why did I let him wake away... Why didn't I fight harder... I should have done better to keep him...
Everyone is telling me there is someone better out there for me... But how could that ever possibly be...? He is everything I wanted and needed in a guy... He was smart and funny and thoughtful... He helped keep me in line when I dreamt too big... Bit encouraged my crazy side a little... He was cuddly and comforting and he didn't scare me... And even though its been so long... I still love him...
I took him for granted... I wish that I could have another chance to prove myself.. To fall in love all over again...
I hope he isn't reading this though... Because I know he'll reject me once more...
But I do want to have the chance to do the one thing we never got to do together... Something he wanted more than anything... To sit together and just watch the stars...
I'm trying but I can't help it... I promise I'm trying... I promise I'm not crying...