Eren P.O.V
I woke up in a cold sweat, my breathing ragged and frantic as I took in my surroundings. Schalk bounded from off of my chair and ran to the bed before jumping on the comforter and running towards me.
He jumped on my lap and started licking my face in a protective manner as if trying to give me closure in the action. Surprisingly, I felt more relaxed as he wiped slobber on my face.
Let's add that to the list of; 'Things I Never Thought I Would Say'.
I smiled at my thoughts, and that helped calm my erratic heartbeat and ridiculous breathing patterns. When I finally calmed myself down, I swung my legs around and set them down on the floor. Before I stood, I looked down at my wrist.
Even though it was just a dream, I swear she could've given me a bruise with how hard she clutched my hand.
It was blank.
Just it's normal, tanned colour. I sighed and slowly walked to the bathroom to make myself look presentable.
When I got there, I quickly tamed my hair to make it look somewhat appropriate and straightened out my outfit. It was normal until I noticed the bruise on my neck. I stared at it longer than necessary before shifting my collar to cover it up.
With finger guns and a wink to the reflection, I ran out of the room to get to Levi's study, hoping that I wasn't late.
-+~•~+-
When I arrived at his study, I knocked on the door before hearing him call out, "Come in." I quickly shuffled into the room to see him staring intently at the books in his bookshelf before quickly reaching towards a certain book and grabbing it. Then he flipped to a certain page before walking back towards his desk, not once looking up from the book.
I awkwardly stood there staring at him before he pointed to the chair beside me. I turned my head to look at what he was pointing at and saw a slip of paper. I picked it up and read it.
- Bring meals
- Leave alone until instructed otherwise
He must be busy today. I nodded and bowed before turning around to grab his breakfast. I walked out into the hallway before leaving for the kitchen, my feet clicking and clacking against the hardwood floor.
When I got there, a tray was waiting on the island for me. It was Levi's breakfast so I picked it up, careful not to spill the water in the pitcher, and bowed to the maids inside before making my way back to Levi's study.
When I got there, he was still heavily invested in his book, so I quietly set the tray down and poured the water in his cup. I bowed and was about to turn around to leave when I heard a small, "Wait." I turned around, and he was looking at me. "I have some more tasks I need you to carry out." He said as he pointed to a piece of paper on his desk.
I looked over at where his finger pointed and picked it up.
-Dust shelves
- Wipe windows
- Sweep floor
- Mop floor
- Do laundry
- Replace candles and torches in the room
- Bring in needed supplies
- Organize shelf
I stared at the list for a moment, my mouth slightly agape before I spoke."I'm going to die." I mumbled under my breath, and I heard Levi chuckle. "That would be a shame." He replied, his eyes never leaving the book. "Aw, you care!" I exclaimed, and he chuckled. "But not enough to give me a break." I finished as I looked back at the list, making me pout.
He only shrugged in response."Rude." I muttered as I left to grab the duster.
-+~•~+-
When I came back, he still had his head buried in the book, and I sighed at this before walking to the bookshelf and swiping the duster inside. When I pulled it out after one swipe, it looked like it had been used for ages. Dust covered almost every single feather, dust bunnies were the size of my fist, my fist, and only Maria knows what else covered the poor duster."This is disgusting." I exclaimed, and I heard him sigh. "I don't generally trust people to clean my things, so I never allow them to." He explained, and I slowly nodded, a little in understanding, a little in disgust.
Then that means he trusts me enough to do this...
The thought sent my heart racing and my face flushed red.
Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up SHUT UP!
I kept shouting in my head about how stupid I was as I continued to try and clean his stupid shelves, realizing just how hard this was going to be.
-+~•~+-
When I finally made his shelf look normal, I swiped my forehead in relief before stopping and groaning.
I still have a dozen other chores to do...
I sighed before leaving the study to find a bucket of water and a towel. I found a bucket in a nearby storage closet and a towel in the same place before shuffling towards a laundry room to fill up the bucket. I made my way back to his study and opened the door before walking over to the windows.
By now he had shifted over to writing on a scroll and marking a map. I dipped my towel in the water before sliding the curtain open. I was surprised to see that it was almost spotless.
Why am I cleaning this?!
I decided not to question the guy in charge of my food income and started wiping away at the window as if it hadn't been cleaned in decades. My arms started growing tired from all the scrubbing, and I grit my teeth in frustration.
It looks the exact same!
I then noticed that I wouldn't be able to reach the top right corner, so I stepped onto the tile windowsill. As I was wiping the window down, I failed to realize the water dripping onto the windowsill, and I also failed to remember how slippery tile can get when wet.
I then realized that I was too far away from the left side of the window, so I sidestepped to the left. I touched the windowsill with my toes, my heel hanging off the edge before my toes just had to slip off.
With a yelp, I was careening backwards. I braced myself for impact, my eyes squeezed tightly for when I would hit the ground.
But I never felt the horrible sensation of all the air leaving my lungs or the harsh bump of my body hitting the floor. Instead, I felt a soft yet firm grip catch me instead.
I opened my eyes and was met with icy blue ones. Levi had caught me like I was a bride, and I blushed at how he held my body close to him in a protective manner.
After a moment, his face flushed a light pink, and we both just stared at each other for a moment.T hen he abruptly set me down on my feet and coughed. "If I had known you were this clumsy I wouldn't have asked you to be my friend."
"Please, you adore me," I said as I was trying to sound casual, but really, my heart was beating so hard that I could practically hear it, and I was afraid he could too. "I'm sorry if it seemed that way, but that is most certainly not the case." He replied, and I scoffed."Whatever." I muttered, and he chuckled before walking back towards his desk.
I sighed and continued scrubbing, my arms going numb from the effort.
-+~•~+-
When I finished, my fingers felt like sponges and my arms were hanging limply at my sides. Nevertheless, I had an obligation to carry out the rest of my chores, so I left the study to grab the broom and the mop. I found them leaning against a wall in an abandoned hallway, so I just grabbed them before walking back to the study.
When I returned, I was surprised to see that Levi wasn't there. His chair and his papers were deserted, and the study was devoid of anyone except for me.
I shrugged it off before setting the mop down so I could sweep first. I swiped once, and nothing came up. Then I remembered that I had swept this floor like yesterday, and it already looked spotless, even without the mop.
I grit my teeth and set the cleaning supplies down before stomping over to the window.
Why am I cleaning things that are already clean?! Like, c'mon! That's just ridiculous!
I think he has a screw loose-
I stopped thinking as I saw Levi standing in the garden down below. I tilted my head in confusion as to why he was out there by himself, and I looked behind me."The floor already looks clean so..." I trailed off as I watched his figure, never moving in the slightest.
Then I shrugged and walked out and down the hallway to reach the back door. After a few flights of stairs and some long hallways, I was standing in front of the back door.
I was having second thoughts, but my curiosity won before I grabbed the door handle and opened the small oak door to find Levi.
As soon as I shut the door, I noticed how cold it was as a blast of icy air hit my body and I remembered that it was late into winter.
I shivered and wrapped my arms around my body to conserve heat before continuing to look for Levi. He was in the same spot as before, and he was just standing there looking a flower bed with a blank expression."Your highness?" I called out, but he didn't respond. He seemed to be in a daze.
Physically, he was here, but mentally he was somewhere else."My prince?" I tried again as I walked towards him, but he still didn't respond. I sighed in exasperation and raised my hand before tapping his shoulder. "L-" I didn't get to finish my sentence because he whipped around and grabbed my wrist in an iron grip before yanking me down as he unsheathed his sword at lightning speed.
He aimed to slice my neck, but as he brought his sword down, I raised my free hand and using my thumb and first two fingers, I placed them on the dull part of his blade and pinched down on his blade with the pads of my fingers.
As I was pushing back against his momentum, he suddenly processed what was going on and quickly took his sword away."If you didn't like me, you could've just said something." I said and he chuckled before loosening his grip on my wrist.
He held it up so he could see it better and examined the red spot on it."I'm sorry." He muttered, and I chuckled. "Don't worry about, just give it a kiss and-" I was cut off from my sarcastic comment as he leaned down and lowered himself and pressed his lips against my wrist.
Before I could process properly what was going on. He removed his lips and stood back up. My face was as red as the roses blooming on the other side of the garden, and I had to fan myself to calm down the vibrant colour."Is that what you wanted?" He asked, and I was still struggling to breathe."I-I was kidding!" I gasped out as I struggled to calm my heart.
Then I noticed his face grow a slight red before he turned away."Why are you here?" He asked, and I awkwardly shrugged, my face still flustered from the recent action. "I finished sweeping and saw you moping so I decided to find you."
"I'm not moping." He said as he started walking, and I followed him. "Don't try to cover this up, you're hardcore moping right now." I pushed, and he sighed."Why are you still here?" He asked, and I pouted. "When people are moping and have a rain cloud over their head, someone needs to be there to be their umbrella." I replied, and he scoffed."One, that was ridiculously cheesy, and two, I'm not moping." He said, and I narrowed my eyes. "Sure." I said, and he growled."I'm not moping. I'm thinking." He explained, and I nodded. "Okay. About what?" I asked, and he turned to look at me."Last time I checked you didn't have free access to my thoughts." He replied as he stuck his hands in the pockets of his pants.
I placed a hand on my chest in an offended manner and scoffed. "You know it almost seems like you don't want me here!" I said, and he sighed, knowing that he wouldn't get me to leave."I'm thinking about Zane."(he's an OC Levi's and Mikasa's younger brother I would have used Isabelle or Furlan but I already have)He said, and I turned to look at him. "When we were kids, he and I would always play together. Mom called us her little tykes. When it snowed, we'd make the best snowmen ever, and compete against each other to see who could make the better one. Then sometimes we would team up against Mikasa in snowball fights because she'd keep throwing snowballs at me, and only me. Then afterwards, uncle Kenny would complement our snowmen, and mom would take us all inside so we could bundle up by the fire and watch the snow from inside." He stared straight ahead as I listened to his story, my gaze never once leaving his face. "And then one day, we couldn't find him. He was just... gone. Not even the kingdoms most powerful hunters, most intelligent guards, or the strongest knights could find him. No matter how hard we looked, he was nowhere to be found. Mikasa locked herself away in her room, my mom and uncle would cry themselves to sleep at night, and I was left alone to grieve. We were so close, even though I acted as if I didn't care, he was actually my best friend, not to mention my brother, and I just couldn't recover. My Uncle eventually decided that the best way to cope was to take the pain out on the village. He raised taxes, enforced the laws with the military and made the village feel like a kingdom of slaves. He shut us all out of his life, and mom was left to grieve alone, just like me. Of course, she would check on me from time to time, but I always lied and told her I was fine, but really I was in worse shape than her." He looked at me, and I just stared back with sadness in my orbs.
"Eventually, Mikasa finally came back out of her room and opened up to us again, but she had a whole new aura surrounding her. She was more mature and stronger than before. She even swore to protect the family no matter what so we wouldn't have to go through the pain of losing someone ever again. My mother eventually recovered, in the sense that she could go a whole day without crying, and we all just accepted the fact that we would never be the same again. But everyone seemed to forget about the first Ackerman child. I just shut myself in my room and did the same thing every day. I just slept, ate, read, wrote, drew, or cried. Mostly the latter. No matter what the servants and my family tried to do, I just couldn't recover. It was almost like I lost a part of myself when we lost Zane." He paused and looked at the ground, and I looked ahead as he continued to speak. "Then one day, my uncle came into my room and talked to me. He told me that if I didn't start acting better soon, then he'd send me away to another village in Stohess to be an Shiganshina diplomat. It seems stupid, but at the time, I was horrified. He practically blackmailed me into feeling better sooner, and pretty soon I came back out of my room, but I guess not in the best way. I never learned how to feel better about Zane, so I became... different, I guess. I decided to put my time into paper, politics, war, planning, fighting, and what not so that I didn't have to think of Zane or who the happy, go-lucky Ackerman family used to be. I guess you can say that wasn't the best way to live my childhood, but it was all I had so..." he trailed off, probably in thought.
Then I guess it was my turn."Um... I-I never had a family." I started, and that made his back straighten. "My earliest memories were on the streets, and I remember having this little wooden box in an alley that I called home. I was the neighbourhood runt, so sometimes the adults would take pity on me and give me food or let me take a bath in their home. Well, the kids weren't so nice. In their defence, I did steal a lot. I didn't hold someone at knifepoint or break into homes, I just pickpocketed and stole pies off of windowsills, stealing a kid's toy right in front of them at most. Eventually, the children of the neighbourhood had enough and started to gang up on me. I generally tried to ignore it, but that's a little hard to do that when you get hit in the side of the face with a rock." I nervously laughed and scratched the back of my neck.
He only seemed disturbed by how calm I was about this. "When the kids realized that throwing things at me wasn't effective, they decided that beating me up was better. So they started getting together and beating me senseless for stealing things of theirs. I was a jerk back then, so I don't blame them. Then one day, a woman who we all didn't know showed up. She watched them beat me like they always did, and right before a kid was able to bash my head with a rock, she grabbed his arm and hit his pressure point. He was crying and screaming, and eventually, all the other kids were too. Then they ran away to their mothers, and you can imagine my surprise when she offered to take me home with her." I smiled when I remembered her blinding smile and rippling kindness.
"She had long black hair that went to her waist, and pale skin that looked like snow. Her eyes were a crazy bright green and she had all the right curves in all the right places if you know what I mean." I said with a laugh, and I heard him chuckle. "She had the looks of a queen, and she was as kind as she was pretty. She fed me and let me bathe in her house. Then, next thing I know, I'm practically her son." I paused and remembered the day for a moment.
"Hey kiddo," the lady started, and I looked up from the bowl of soup to look at her, a piece of chicken dangling from my lips. "what happened to you? Why do you steal?" She asked with pity, and I growled before shooting up out of my seat."You don't know anything about me, old lady! Leave me alone!" I shouted, hoping that she would end it at that. Truth is, I'm just scared that she'll judge me."But do you think it's okay?" She asked as she tilted her head. "Shut up! You don't know me! I do what I do for myself, and no one else-" she cut me off."You only do it because you have nothing left. Am I right?" She asked, and I clenched my fists."Shut up..." I growled, but she continued. "You are so jealous of the other kids and their families that you take what they have so you can feel better."
"Shut up..!" I said, getting louder this time. "Truth is, you just want to be accepted, but because the other people won't accept you, you resorted to making their lives worse." She concluded, and I blew up."Shut up! That's not true at all! You have no idea-" she cut me off again. "What if I gave you a home right now. Would you stop stealing?" She asked, and I froze.'Yes.' "No," I stated, and she gave me a soft smile. "Don't lie. I can tell when people are lying, and you're lying." She said in response, and I grit my teeth."I'm not lying!" I exclaimed, and she sighed. "Yes. Yes, you are." She pushed, and I growled."You're just an old lady! So shut up and leave me alone-" I stopped talking as she got up and started walking towards me.
I scrambled backwards but she only got closer. I hit the wall and raised my hands above my head so my hands would get the worst of the beating. But instead of her punching me, she knelt down to my height and wrapped her arms around my skinny body, then held me close. With her hand on the back of my head and the other around my waist, she spoke, "You don't have to be jealous anymore. You don't have to steal or starve any longer. I can see it in your eyes. You just want a home."Her whisper made me start to tremble, and my eyes tickled with tears."I'll be your home. I can be the family you wish you had, and I promise you I won't leave you behind. You just have to trust me, okay?" She tested, and tears fell from my eyes.
Like the naive child I was, I wrapped my arms around her too. My skinny, boney arms wrapped themselves around her neck and held her close to me as I cried tears of joy and relief.
'I finally have a home...'
"She taught me how to read, write, cook, and she even taught me a few fighting techniques. She was amazing." As I said the sentence, my smile fell, knowing what happened next in my story. But I continued, knowing that I had to say it.
"But one night, I woke to hear her coughing like crazy. When I came downstairs, she had rashes all over her body, and blood flew out of her mouth when she coughed. When I tried to get closer, she just screamed and yelled at me to get away and to get the doctor. Because I was just a kid, I thought she had grown to hate me and wanted to get rid of me. But I still listened and ran to grab the doctor. When he came back out of the house after checking on my mom, he informed me that she had the plague. She had for a while then but never told me so I wouldn't worry. She died a week later. I still remember crying as the knights burned down the house, and a few village moms had to hold me back from running inside. Then came her burial. Well, at least I thought it was a burial. No one would even touch her body, and I just watched as they wrapped her in disgusting rags and threw her in a rotting casket before throwing it in a hole and setting it on fire. Such a kind woman, practically an angel, didn't even get a proper burial or respect. To this day, it breaks my heart." I paused as I sniffed a bit to hold my tears.
I refused to seem weak in front of Levi, so I continued."Then came the part of my life when Mr Smith took me in. A few days after he did, he was hosting a dinner party, and I overheard him talking about me. 'I swear, street rats look better than him!'. Yeah, that's not the most encouraging thing to hear as a kid, but I used it as motivation to prove him wrong. So I tried my best to excel in maid training. I learned how to do all that fancy stuff that you've seen me do, and I also learned how to mark maps, read compasses, and I also learned about different villages and countries that the other servants didn't care about. But in the end, she never seemed satisfied, so I gave up trying to impress him, and just stopped talking to him. Eventually, he decided to give me a job in the palace" I paused and smiled again. "Then, I met you!" I exclaimed, and he looked at me as I closed my eyes and smiled even brighter.
We were quiet for a moment before I looked around.
What the-
We both looked around together to see the falling snow and piles of it in the garden. The tiny dots slowly fell from the sky and floated to the ground before piling together and adorning bushes, flowers, trees, and the castle. I smiled at the scene and chuckled."Guess we didn't notice, huh?" I said, and he nodded.
One landed on his robe and melted almost immediately. I smiled at it and turned around. There was a small pile a few feet away from us, and I walked up to it before crouching down. I dug my hands inside, wincing at the piercing cold feeling, but still, I wrapped my hand around certain parts of it and moulded shapes with my fingers."What are you doing?" Levi asked from behind me.
I held up a hand as if signalling him to wait and continued my mini-project. When I finally finished, I turned around to show him.
It was a tiny snowman.
He only stared at it, I'm guessing in thought, as I held my arms out, as if beckoning him to take it. He eventually did, and I saw something I never could've imagined. A small tear, the size of a snowflake, fell from his eye and disappeared as it trickled down his face. Then he quickly wiped it away, and sniffed up the rest of the tears before gently setting the snow sculpture on the ground."Thank you. For listening." He said, and I smiled. "Anytime," I replied, and he nodded.
Then I shivered from the cold and wrapped my arms around my body as the water on my hands made them increasingly colder."We should get back-" I cut myself off as I felt something drape over my shoulders.
Levi had given me his robe."No! I couldn't possibly-" he cut me off with the wave of his hand. "I don't want you getting sick again, it's inconvenient." He quickly said.
I flushed red, from the cold or shock, I don't know."But you might get sick." I said, and he let out a ghost smile. "I'll be fine." He reassured me.
Okay, the red colour was definitely from shock and embarrassment.
"If you say so," I muttered as I grabbed the inside flaps and drew it around my body. While doing the action, I got a whiff of the robe.
It smells like him...
I rapidly shook my head in embarrassment.
Stop being so darn creepy!
My face was a bright red as he turned around to give me a sceptical look, and I nervously scratched the back of my head as I chuckled. As we walked in silence, he finally spoke up. "I guess we both have rough pasts, huh?" He asked, and I looked down."I guess so." I replied, and he nodded. "I'm not going to say sorry for your mother, because I'm guessing that's not what you want to hear. But I guess I can say that I can relate with you, and I hope that's enough." He said, and I smiled.
He's right. It is pretty dumb of people to apologize for other people's losses when it's not even their fault. Sometimes, we just want to relate to someone. And now...
I looked up at the back of his head as I trailed behind him, and smiled.
I have someone to relate to.
-+~•~+-
When we arrived at the back door, he opened it for me and I walked inside before hearing him shut it behind us. I took off the robe and handed it to him. "Here," I said, and he shook his head.
I suddenly thought that he was giving it to me, and then he spoke. "You still have to do the laundry, remember?" He said with a smirk.
I literally felt my thoughts shatter as I froze for a second. I then snapped back into reality. "Right," I said with a chuckle. I draped it over my forearm and bowed."I had a wonderful time, your majesty." I said with a smile, and he nodded. "As did I." He replied, and I just kind of looked at him for a moment."So, am I still pestering you?" I asked as I placed a hand on my hip.
He chuckled and said, "Of course. That's all you ever do."I scoffed and placed a hand on my chest. "And here I thought we were just becoming BFFs." I exclaimed in fake shock."We already are." I heard him mutter under his breath, probably hoping that I couldn't hear.
Yet I did, and my face once again went aflame. Then I thought about the scene in the garden, and the sadness in Levi's eyes when he opened up to me.
I had just seen a side of him that I had never seen before, and I'm still a little bewildered. But in the end, I can only relate to him. His grey-blue eyes bore into mine, and we stood there in serene silence, and I couldn't help but feel giddy inside.
Then we both snapped out of it as we heard people coming down the hallway. I sighed and looked back up at him before waving and turning around. "Have a goodnight your highness." I said, and he waved back."And to you as well." He muttered, and I smiled.
Villains are just people whose stories haven't been told.
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