Enna's P.O.V
I gazed at the bruise that glared at me through the mirror. It was the hickey that Joey had given me and still, I hadn't been able to cover it up. A sigh left my lips when I wrapped a scarf around my neck and stepped away from the mirror. My ears listened out for any movements in the house, like I did every morning but there was still silence.
My aunt was still at the hospital and it had gotten harder for me to see her. There was practically no news from her and it hurt me more than ever that my only family member didn't want to see me any more. I tried to understand why, but with the lack of news from my sister, the abandonment of my parents and finally, Joey, I couldn't organize my thoughts well.
It was disrupting my grades to the point where I was thinking of just collecting all my work from school and doing them at home. Of course it was far from possible, but the principal had some sort of love for one of the smartest kids in her school, in her own words. I scoffed as I walked away from my room and started walking down the stairs.
My head was once again filled with the thoughts of what happened with Joey at the mechanics. I couldn't believe that it was me, the good girl, who had let the bad boy play with me how he wished and I hated myself for letting him. Of course I couldn't only blame myself, I didn't have wool covering my eyes, I knew who to blame and when.
A blush rose to my cheeks, heating them instantly when I had realised the true movements of what I had done. I had let him do it because I wanted it to happen, I wanted to let some of his darkness into my life because I was already clouded with it. I could tell that to him, to him I was some sort of saint because I was everything he was not.
It wasn't a secret that I had some problems in my life, but I could manage them. Or so I had thought. Embarrassment flooded through me when I remembered when Joey had unraveled the final secrets that I kept from everyone for a long time. It was the oddest thing in my opinion, because he knew so much of me and I knew so much of him, yet we weren't even friends.
Did I want that though? Did I want someone as broken as Joey to be brought into my life? I couldn't dip my finger into his sins because he couldn't hold them by himself. From what I had seen, he was changing himself thought wasn't he? He was pushing himself to be a better person while I was digging myself a bigger grave.
The only thing that was holding me up was my grades and now that was failing. I tried pushing myself back up by doing what I had always done, closing my eyes and thinking of the happiness I was surrounded by when my sister was here. I had my aunt but now, everything was in shambles and I didn't know how to gain back the control in my life. Everything was a mess.
My feet carried me further towards the school, the place where I was going to be for only a couple more months until we were done. My head ached at the thought of going to university, but it was a good thing. That way I could be away from here, I could concentrate on furthering myself as a person and continuing to find my sister without any distractions.
What was I even saying? I couldn't escape my problems that easily. I knew what was to come the more the days would go by. I would have to maybe say goodbye to my aunt, I might also have to move back to Germany if the case is that I couldn't live here anymore since I wasn't eighteen yet. I shook my head, trying to remove the negative whiny thoughts out of my head.
I had made it to class since I knew my only friend would be with her new boyfriend, but I didn't mind. At least she was happy, right? My heart drummed against my chest when I realised that I had this class with Joey. We hadn't spoken or seen each other since that day at the mechanics, where I had decided to leave, knowing he would lock up the place anyway.
As soon as I had stepped into the classroom, I noticed how his seat was occupied. I was almost too surprised at the sight of him there that I didn't move, until I felt many presences behind me which is where I decided to move. His cross had glinted in the light, just like his eyes had when they had found my own.
I ducked my head and made sure to avoid looking at him as I walked towards my desk. I could feel his eyes burning through me, I guess, it was just that feeling I had. Soon enough though, Joey had been called away to the principal's office and I was left in bliss because I didn't have him staring at me the whole time.
When lesson had finally ended, I found myself walking to my therapist's office, deciding that I really needed to speak to her. However when I had gotten to the door, I saw that there was another doctor's name on the door. Narrowing my eyes at the door, I started walking away, deciding not to be a curious person.
Unfortunately, I also had a meeting at the principal's office so I had to set myself off towards there. It's not that I didn't like our principal, I just thought she may have been a little too...flirtatious, towards some of the boys. Then again, I shouldn't really judge her. I sighed and shook my head, what use was it talking to myself?
Being in the head of Enna one day wasn't going to be an easy thing. The one thing that I couldn't think any more about was Joey and yet, the one person that I could talk to about it was not even here. I started making my way towards the principal's office, hearing someone speaking inside but I couldn't exactly here what was being said.
So I decided to wait outside, like the good girl I was. Only the Lord knows what this meeting could be about but I had a feeling it may be about my grades. I fixed the glasses on my nose, pushing it up and squinting at the door, noticing that the writing on the door (which said Principal) was starting to look blurry.
And then I sneezed, like really loud. Somehow, between that time, the door had opened and I was left dazed when I saw the bad boy himself standing in front of me with a red face. It was more of a flustered look more than anything else, until I saw the same expression on the principal's face.
I gulped down the lump that had lodged itself in my throat before brushing past Joey and making my way to her office. The burst of heartache hurt me immensely, because I may have been shy but I wasn't stupid, I knew what must have happened in this office. The most hurtful thing was that I was pushed into this atmosphere again.
Third Person Point of View from Enna
She didn't know how to think. She knew what she felt but even with the knowledge of words in her brain, she couldn't put it together. She couldn't understand why this new feeling was developing inside her, why she was letting herself to allow that feeling to enter her mind after she fell into that trap last time.
Enna knew the bad boy was bad for her, but she wanted him. She felt that pull inside her when he was around her because he was the demon that enticed her because she was good. No, no she couldn't put the words together like that because she knew that Joey was trying to find his good self again, which is why he looks towards her.
But why? She questioned herself every time after he or she would leave each other. She questioned why Joey couldn't throw his teasing tantrums towards his friend, Ava who clearly didn't like Enna. Enna still feared what Ava would do if Joey hasn't already found out about Ava's jealousy, the strong hatred that was fueled by the act of love.
Enna knew that she had gotten in between a love between best friends that could have happened, but something alerted her that Joey didn't want his best friend. He may not have wanted anything other than a bit of a nerd in his life. He struggled with a lot of things, more than a lot of things, but she couldn't understand how he could go through life with that kind of weight.
At night, Enna would lie awake in her bed thinking of how things have changed so quickly, with such ease that there was no thinking of what it was like at the beginning. Joey had changed her life little by little, made it clear how much she loved having the love of kids around her, how happy it seemed to be, how much she loved helping out.
What she didn't expect was to have her aunt taken away from her because of consequences. It sometimes rang out in her mind that maybe God was punishing her because she was doing sinful things with the bad boy, or maybe it was because she was focusing on a boy rather than keeping up her own grades.
At this point, she didn't know how to balance things any more. She had lost control of how to grasp onto things tightly in order to keep a balance. She wanted her sister back, she wanted to change her name back, she wanted the happiness to be resolved into her life so it just fit. There was a way to be happy with what she had, but everyone wanted more.
It was like she was being given a choice, your intelligence or your family and happiness. So as she lay there that night, thinking about the boy who had the numerous tattoos scattered beautifully around his body, the piercings he wore and the tongue he spoke bad words with, she wondered how far he could go in his life, the way he could turn his life around.
She moved a lot in the bed and thought about the boy she used to like, the one who still torments her when he felt like it. Oliver was bad for her, way worse than Joey because Oliver would hit her. He would make her his own, his property, his to hurt. He scarred her and profusely apologized, but it was too much damage caused to someone.
The tears would fall from her eyes and she would question why God gave her the intelligence, but why she couldn't use the intelligence to figure out a way to get over the pain her ex boyfriend left on her, why her parents had to abandon her and whether or not she would be able to see her sister again.
She would question endlessly why she couldn't at least have her sister back, why she had to be stupid enough to let her go missing. It wasn't fair that all this was being put onto Enna because at one point, there was going to be a time where Enna was lose it. Enna was on the verge of breaking down further, the more she was being pulled down into the darkness of depression.
She may have been the light to Joey's, but Joey was bad for her. Wasn't he?