Welcome to the Epilogue, where Jimin gets undone and things get explained.
Trigger warning: this chapter deals with heavy subjects like loss and death and mourning. Please be cautious while reading it.
. . .
"You kissed me like an alcoholic taking their last drink."
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E P I L O G U E: T H E H E A L I NG
"How long are you going to mop around?" Taehyung seemed tired, his hair unkempt, dark circles under his eyes. A tired sigh escaped his lips.
"I'm...fine, man. What you talking 'bout?" A very drunk Jimin replied, trying to stand up from the seat but failing miserably.
Taehyung closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. I don't know what to do with this guy, he thought. His eyes snapped open upon hearing a light thud and the sound of table hitting the carpeted floor.
"Ow. My back hurts."
Jimin was lying on the floor, a hand on back, the other one covering his eyes.
Taehyung shook his head, muttered a few profanities, close to giving up on his best friend but knowing that he'd never do that. He looped his arms around Jimin and helped him stand up.
"Do you need me to take you to hospital?" Taehyung asked.
As soon as Jimin stood up, he turned to look at Taehyung, placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Thanks, man," he slurred. "But no thanks. You know how much anxious they make me."
Just the word hospital filled his mind with dark thoughts, panic and anxiousness choking his throat, obstructing his airways as flashbacks filled his mind.
You need to pull the plug, Jimin. She isn't coming back.
I don't want to see you ever again.
She's gone, Jimin. You have to move on.
She doesn't want you near her. Can't you understand that?
He removed his hand from Taehyung's shoulder and staggered towards the mini bar at one side of his suite. Taehyung looked at him with a sorrowful expression.
"I need another drink."
Before he could pick up the bottle, a hand wrapped around the bottle, pulling it away from Jimin's reach.
"Hey. Give me my bottle back," Jimin said.
Taehyung gave him a look that read shut up. And said, "If you don't get your sorry ass out of this room right now, I'll smash this bottle on your head."
Jimin was quiet, and then, he burst out laughing, his head leaned back.
"What's so funny?" Taehyung asked.
"Y-You just said you'll... You'll smash that bottle on my head."
Taehyung's patience was running thin. Drunk Jimin was the worst. And Taehyung had no idea how to handle him today.
"Don't tempt me, Jimin. Now stand up."
"No."
Taehyung placed the bottle in the shelf, and then glared at Jimin.
"If you don't stand up, I swear to God, I'll let you die here. You hear me?" He said.
Despite being drunk, Jimin gave him a knowing grin.
"You won't do that."
"Yes. But stand the fuck up, man. Please. Today's the inauguration of my company and I need you there with me. Completely sober, not pissed drunk," Tahyung said.
Jimin sighed, resting his head on his arm which was on the counter. "I'm sad, Taehyung."
Taehyung looked at his friend and thought about how things had changed so much. It'd been years and Jimin still hadn't recovered from pain. It pained Taehyung to watch his best friend in such a bad condition. And that's why Taehyung was so hell bent on taking Jimin to the inauguration with him.
"I know. And that's why we're going to the party to help you feel better. Okay? Now stand up 'cause I am not going alone. Besides, you might find a lady that you might like."
Jimin scowled. "I don't want anyone."
Taehyung raised his hands as if surrendering. "Okay. I'm sorry. Now let's go and get your prepared. You need to be sober. Got it? 'Cause I don't want you to create a scene like last time. You broke the poor guy's nose," Taehyung said and let out a laugh.
Jimin stood up, picked up his coat. "That guy was pissing me off."
"Jimin, he was just asking about your girlfriend."
"Yeah. And that pissed me. Do you want me to break your nose too?"
Both men were walking side by side to the elevator.
"You won't," Taehyung answered, a complacent smile on his face.
Jimin grumbled something about Taehyung being cocky, and Taehyung pretended that he didn't hear his friend.
"There still are a few hours till the party starts. Please don't be shit-faced there. I want this party to be the best one people have ever seen. Got it?" Taehyung said, pressing the button for ground floor. The doors closed and with a ding, the elevator started going down.
"Yeah, yeah."
Getting out of the elevator and walking out of the hotel, Jimin threw his car keys which the driver caught with ease, unlocked the car. Without so much as a word, Jimin sat in the car. Meanwhile Taehyung walked towards his own car and drove out of the parking lot.
. . .
Jimin couldn't believe what he had just heard. His heart seemed to have stopped beating as her words registered in his mind.
"I'm dying, Jimin."
"I don't want to see you before I die. Don't come to see me."
Jimin couldn't move even though he wanted to run after her and reprimand her for making such a sensitive joke. But he was rooted to where he stood, his feet too heavy to move as his heart sunk.
It couldn't be. How's this possible? How can Eun Hee die?
And then, his mind went blank as only one thought floated in his mind. Not her too. She can't leave me too. Everything that had happened in past to make Jimin the way he was came rushing back to his mind like an unexpected storm. His hands shook as his eyes blurred with tears, panic spreading through his body like wildfire.
Jimin regretted every single thing he did wrong. He regretted not letting his wounds heal that bled on Eun Hee. He regretted not letting go of the pains of past which caused him to treat Eun Hee poorly so many times. He regretted entering her life and making it hell. He regretted being alive.
Before Jimin knew, he was running out of the hospital. His mind had shut down and he knew that if he stood even a single second more inside the hospital, his heart would fail him.
Shivers ran down his spine as he rushed out. He wasn't looking where he was going as he collided with someone and fell back on his back. Despite the fact that his back hurt, he didn't feel it, for the pain in his heart was millions of times greater than that.
"Jimin?" Taehyung's voice wasn't any help as Jimin's eyes stayed unfocused.
Fear prickled at Taehyung's chest as he once again saw his best friend in such dissociated state. He had seen Jimin once before like this and he never wanted Jimin to ever go through that again, because for Jimin, it had been hell on earth. Everyday had been hard to live.
So, Taehyung did what he had to do. He helped Jimin into the car and took him to his father, just like last time.
. . .
Jimin was as sober as he could be and it was an extremely stupid decision, he thought. The noises were too loud around him. Every single person noise seemed to make his head throb with pain. He had long ago realised that these business parties were such a waste of time and unnecessary. They were nothing but a mere disturbance to him now.
And he wanted to get out of this place so bad. But it was his best friend's party and he just couldn't abandon him, not when he promised to stay there.
"Taehyung?" Jimin turned to look at Taehyung who was laughing lightly at something his friend said.
Upon hearing Jimin's voice, Taehyung turned to look at him. "Yeah?"
"I'll be back in a minute." Saying this, Jimin stood up from the bar stool.
"Where are you going? Don't leave this early, man. The party just started," Taehyung said, looking at him with narrow eyes.
"I won't leave. I promise. I just need a breather."
Hesitantly, Taehyung nodded and turned back to talk to his friend.
Jimin made his way out of the hall and into the silent corridor. He decided to go out for a while and smoke a bit. Smoking always calmed down his racing thoughts. Even though he knew how bad it was for his health, he couldn't help but still crave it for the sake of peace of mind.
Climbing up the stairs, he walked out at the balcony. The place was too dark, the moon hidden by the dark cloud. It seemed like it was going to rain. Were the skies going to cry tonight for Jimin's loss too?
As he walked towards the railing, his eyes adjusted to the darkness and he noticed a figure leaning against the balcony, her arms resting on the railing.
Jimin felt a weird sort of pain in his chest. It wasn't a physical pain. And it couldn't be described into words either. It was something nostalgic. It felt like how longing felt. A dull but prominent ache in the chest. That was what Jimin felt; longing.
His feet took him to the railing, his mind hazy and confused. Was he hallucinating due to his headache?
She was there. Or maybe it was just an illusion that Jimin's mind seemed to be playing in him quite a lot. Like the time he thought he saw her sitting in the office in his building but she wasn't there. Jimin was addicted to the memory of her. He was addicted to the way he felt whenever he thought about her or saw her pictures or envisioned her in his mind.
After she was gone, he came to the realisation that she was his addiction, his nepenthe that made him forget all the sadness and pain in the world.
And right now, Jimin didn't know if he was hallucinating or not. He couldn't speak. He couldn't move. His heart seemed heavy and his eyes burning.
Am I still drunk? This can't be...
But his illusions were shattered as soon as he heard her voice, the same voice he was dying to hear since years, the same voice that calmed the demons in his mind, the same voice that he loved so so so much.
"It's rude to stare, you know."
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NOTE: Hope this chapter helped you guys understand Jimin's behaviour. I haven't specified much but those who have read CCB will know what I'm talking about. But also without that, you can still get why he behaved the way he did.
Thank you so much for staying with Jimin and Eun Hee till the end. For reading their story. For reading my work and for your immense support. Thank you so so so much. (There'll be a bigger thank you note soon so I'll keep this one short.)
I'm pretty satisfied with the ending. Maybe it's rushed. Maybe it's not. Maybe they get together. Maybe they don't. It's all up to you. From this point on, it is up to you to decide what happens with them. Do they stay as friend or strangers? Or do they get together and marry and have ten babies? It's all up to you.
There are no plans for a sequel right now. But let's see.
Once again, thank you so much. I love you all so so so so much. You guys mean the world to me. And I genuinely wish for your happiness and success.
Stay golden, my precious BlackRoses.
Yours truly, Rose A.