Octavia's guide to the hell that is the English language
OXYCONTIN
/ˌäksēˈkän(t)in/
(n.) A synthetic analgesic drug that is similar to morphine in its effects
⤷alternative definition- Octavia's go to drug...apparently
"did you really think that talking to him about his fingers was the best way to start a conversation? Or even better, introduce yourself?" Amelia laughed, still stuck on the contents of Octavia's first conversation with Joe, as he liked to be called.
"Hey, I panicked. I didn't know what else to do!" Octavia retaliated, pretending to be hurt.
"Sweetie, we really need to get you a conversation coach." Amelia said sympathetically.
"Yeah, sweetie." Joe said mocking Amelia, "And, lucky for you, I am great at conversations." He joked as he tried to catch up to them.
"That's adorable and all but you literally shouted the word "figured" in my face, that typically scares people." Octavia scrunched her nose as she patted his back.
"Hey, you started it!" Joe shot back.
"Good comeback, sweetie." Octavia mocked Joe, "Also, where are you taking us?"
"Good question, I don't know." Joe shrugged.
"You don't know?" Octavia wore a stunned look.
"Oooo, "Celebrity gets us lost *not clickbait* would make a great video." Amelia chimed in, staring down at her phone.
"What is she talking about?" Joe asked Octavia quietly.
"She runs a blogging YouTube channel, pretty popular actually, almost to one million subscribers." Octavia bragged.
"Huh, I should create a YouTube channel." Joe mentioned.
"Oh I'd love to see all the dumb things you would post." Octavia rolled her eyes.
"It's not *dumb* it's *art*" Joe fought back, "Also we're here."
"I thought you said you didn't know-"
"I am the wise and all knowing Joe Mazzello, just wanted to see your reaction"
"More like Mozzarella."
"At least my name doesn't sound like Octopus." Joe said with a shrug as they walk up towards the others, leaving Octavia stunned with his comeback.
Joe had actually walked them back to the costume trailer, where Roger and Brian were, watching as a blond man stood, his face obscured by Rogers back. She could hear them arguing about costuming.
"Why did they put them in costume again? We aren't even filming for a couple of weeks, I just don't understand." Roger argued.
"You don't understand anything, it's to make sure there aren't any problems. See, if Ben's shirt was wrong, we would have time to fix it." Brian explained.
"Ben looks fine no matter what, now gwil he could use some-"
"Ah Joe there you are, it's time for your perm!" Brian announced, cutting Roger off.
"My... what?" Joe asked, clearly confused.
"they're gonna make your hair curly." Octavia helped, patting him on the back.
Joe ran his hands through his ginger hair, "Are you sure?"
"Yup, they've already got the supplies." Brian pointed in the direction that Joe followed, reluctantly of course.
This meant the end of Octavia's and Joe's conversation, which she was actually quite sad about. She's never met anyone she could totally be herself around besides Amelia, and that scared her; she tried to tell herself to just stop getting too close, stop the daring and rebellious side of her, but she couldn't, and that scared her even more. She didn't want to let herself fall down that dark path again.
"Now while we're all here, Octavia, Amelia, I'd like you to meet the rest of the cast. Ben, Rami, Allen, this is Octavia and Amelia."
"You must be the cool younger sister." Ben smirked at Gwil as he shook Octavia's hand.
"Oh, totally" Octavia laughed. Ben reached out to shake Amelia's hand, apparently it was Amelia's turn to freak out, and why wouldn't she? It was Ben Hardy, the closest person to appear as Roger.
"It's a true pleasure to meet you, darling." Rami reached in to shake their hands too. He looked and acted so much like Freddie, it was almost like meeting him himself. She couldn't believe how great the casting was for this movie.
"It's nice to meet you Octavia, I can't wait for you to teach Joe bass so he'll stop sounding like an out of tune earthquake." Allen said, shaking her hand. Octavia only just managed to place his character though he wasn't in costume.
"Oh my god..." Octavia said in disbelief, "they're making you play Prenter? But you're such a nice person and way too attractive..."
"She's not wrong." Roger said under his breath as he let out a laugh.
"Uh sorry I didn't mean that in a bad way... Anyway, it's very nice to meet all of you, really." Octavia said, trying to relieve the awkwardness.
"The pleasure is all ours." Rami stated.
"It is still way too early for this, Rog did you know your hair is outrageously scratchy?" Ben said to Roger, trying not to touch his wig.
"Thank god for coffee, mate." Allen said, taking a slip out of his travel mug.
"How rude of us, Octavia, Amelia, would you like some coffee?" Rami asked, standing up to grab some cups.
"I'd rather do copious amounts of OxyContin before I consume that growth stunting sludge." Octavia stated casually before she noticed everyone staring at her. Her eyes widened to giant saucers as Allen, Rami, Ben, Gwil, Roger and Amelia burst into teary-eyed laughter.
"Wow Gwil, she IS way cooler than you." Ben spat out between laughter.
"I-I-I didn't mean it like that I swear I-" Octavia was becoming flustered again.
"No, no, it's fine dear, or should I say, Oxy Octavia?" Ben said, sending them into more laughter.
"Joe was right, you are out of hand." Octavia shot back, stifling a laugh.
"Joe said what? about ME?" Ben was becoming jealous.
"Oh. shit." Allen muttered.
"Oh yeah he said that you were getting ' 'too out of hand.'" Octavia strung out Joe's words, watching Ben grow more jealous.
"Well old gingy's gonna get a piece of my mind." He said walking away, trying not to laugh as well.
"They should just call you homewrecker Octavia honestly." Rami laughed.
"I'm not sure what's worse, Oxy or homewrecker."
"Homewrecker!!" Ben shouted, still trying to find the trailer that Joe was in.
liked by benhardy1, brianmayforreal and 7.5k others
Joe_mazzello: #gorgeous
lucyboynton1- Loooool
⤷username- ok i love you
username- #grandpastyle
username- Joe?? How could they do this to you??
benhardy1- I see i've been replaced by @via_leea, care to explain??
(arrow) via_leea- @benhardy1 please leave me out of this🤦🏻♀️
(arrow) joe_mazzello- @benhardy1 @via_leea Benny, sweetie!! I promise Octavia is just a phase, don't leave me!!!!
⤷username- Oooooo tea
INSTAGRAM DIRECT
via_leea
Just a PHASE??? JUST A PHASE MAZZELLO?? I thought I was more to you!!
joe_mazzello
I had to, for Ben's sake!! They're just cover words I swear!!
via_leea
no it's fine, you were just a side hoe anyway🤷🏻♀️
joe_mazzello
That's cruel, I thought I meant more to YOU
via_leea
Don't make me come slap you, I will slap the curls right out of your hair
joe_mazzello
So you noticed my hair? 😏
This was all new for Octavia. For once she felt bold and unjudged. She didn't have to create a coverup for people to like her. These people have watched her be a total fool and they still laughed with her instead of at her.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Joe heard an abrupt knock on his trailer and then soon the door slamming, only to see Octavia standing there with her arms crossed.
"So you've found me." Joe said condescendingly. Octavia returned his comment with an eye roll. "Have you met the other losers yet?"
"What do you mean? You are by far the biggest loser of the bunch." Octavia shot back, giggling slightly.
"I don't know how i'll ever learn from such a rude teacher." Joe put his hand to his chest and pretending to be hurt.
"Cute."
"Yeah that one always gets the ladies, good job Joe" A blonde woman said from the corner of the trailer. She was swiping on her phone as one of the hairdressers was cutting her hair.
"Lucy, how ever so kind of you to chime into MY conversations." Joe returned, looking at her reflection in the mirror.
"Oh, I'm Lucy by the way, you must be Joe's girlfriend." She said, reaching her hand out for Octavia to shake.
"That's hilarious, I'm Octavia, Gwils sister. They called me here because apparently he can't play bass and I get to teach him." Octavia said, shaking Lucy's hand. "I've just met him today."
"Oh, well you two fight like an old married couple." Lucy said laughing.
"An old married couple with two dogs, shi tzus, Buddy and Baxter. And then one kid, a boy named William. A cute little suburban house with a backyard big enough for Buddy and Baxter." Joe said rambling as the hairdresser took out his hair curlers.
"As long as you take my last name." Octavia added.
"And be a Lee like Gwil? No thank you, you're a Mazzello and that's final."
"I want a divorce."
"But what about William? Buddy and Baxter? Apologize to them now." Joe was acting fake hurt again.
"Ugh fine. I'm sorry William, Buddy, Baxter, Mother still loves you." Octavia said in the most annoyed way possible.
"They appreciate that." Joe said as the hair dresser swiveled his chair around to face Octavia.
"Also, why do we sound like the petty rich suburban couple; 'Mr. and Mrs. Joseph and Octavia Mazzello and their son, William'?"
"I don't know, why did your mom give you such a petty rich suburban name?" Joe shot back.
"Okay, Mr. Mazzello, all finished." The hairdresser said.
"Now, this will wash out in about 7 to 10 days right?" He said running his hands through his freshly curled hair. Everyone dead panned to face him, all wearing the same grim expression.
"Joe, do you know what 'perm' stands for?" Octavia asked in disbelief.
"Joe... sweetie..." Lucy trailed off, holding her hand over her mouth.
"What? 7 to 10 days, isn't that what the box says?" Now Joe was starting to get panicked. He frantically reached for the perm solution box, looking for directions or anything to calm his nerves. He pivoted towards Octavia and Lucy, suddenly very pale, all the color had drained from his face.
"Perm stands for permanent doesn't it?" And just as the words left his mouth, he fainted.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Ahhh it's honestly really fun writing in Joe as a character. I'm excited to continue Joe's Octavia's and Christian's plot, do you think that Joe and Octavia will get together? I can't for you guys to find out!! I'll see y'all Joe Hoes in the next Chap-TER
-xo Tavi