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NATASHA WAS GIVEN TWO RULES when she offered to babysit Elenora.
1. Do not refer to it as babysitting, or Elenora will throw a fit like a baby.
2. No Peter in the house. Unless for summer homework. Then he must leave by 6:30 PM.
Steve and Bucky had written out them down for her, convinced that she would forget, go against them, or claim they had said different rules.
These rules, they told her, were very important to Elenora's well being.
But neither of them, Natasha realized after 72 hours of them being gone, had anything to say about Elenora glowing blue.
Given, the girl wasn't only glowing blue - no, that'd be too easy - she was shaking, and things around her were shaking as well.
She was a mess - a full mess. Standing in the middle of the hallway, arms clung to each other and hair as wild and as messy as it could get. Not to mention the terrified expression on her face -Elenora looked like she was going to barf. Or cry. Or scream.
And then there was the shaking - like she was cold or something, but not like that at all because everything around her was being moved and shoved and pushed and there was zero stability whatsoever.
Not to mention, again, she was glowing blue.
After this, Natasha decided, she would retire from babysitting forever.
"Have you tried a shower?" Natasha suggested, her tone louder than regular in an effort to be heard over the noise of mail tumbling off the table. "Hot water might help you...relax."
"I can't go into the bathroom," Elenora paused to draw a sharp breath, "without everything moving ten feet away from me."
Natasha furrowed her eyebrows. "Do you think you could do that to water?"
Elenora ran her fingers through her knotty, bed-recked hair. "Do we want to find out?"
Letting out a sigh, Natasha's eyes glossed over the written rules.
So much for an easy weekend.
"Uh, Aunt Tasha?" Elenora broke her out of her thoughts. it was really not the time for one of the earth's mightesty Avengers to be thinking about vacation. "What are we going to do?"
"Stark?" she offered.
"No way."
"Banner could help - loss of control and all."
"Aren't you the one who sings him back to human form?"
"Do you want me to sing to you?"
A wild mess of brown hair shook. "Absolutely not."
Running out of ideas, Natasha pulled out another name: "Peter."
Shaking her head furiously. Elenora declined with a harsh "No, no way."
Natasha cocked her head. "Why not?"
"Because he made me promise-" Elenora cut herself off because she was not about to self-incriminate. Sure, she made some kind of deal with Peter about telling if it got worse - and it had before it got to this point - but she was never going to admit it.
Elenora could handle herself. She had for a long time.
She said, "Not Peter."
With an exhale and a roll of her eyes, Natasha grabbed her keys off the kitchen counter. "Charles it is then."
"Charles?" Elenora choked out. She didn't think she could ever show her face at that school again after the whole dead mom's birthday ordeal. Truly, it was horrifying to even imagine the school in her head - how was she going to go in there, a real mess and a half, and be calm about it.
"It's Charles or Peter."
Elenora didn't want a lecture from her boyfriend. She didn't want eggshell walking.
She just wanted some help.
"Uncle Charles it is, then."
***
Charles has heard voices since he was a kid, and for the most part, they didn't affect him. Sometimes they were good, but mostly, the strongest voices were bad. He heard a lot of snide comments, mostly, but there was the occasional mental screaming. He heard about deep regrets and missed opportunities and dark, dark secrets.
But nothing Charles had ever heard in his mind scared him as much as the voice of his niece on a Tuesday afternoon.
"Uncle Charles, I-I think I need your help."
Charles didn't know how Elenora got to his school. He didn't know how she got in, or who showed her to his office.
All he knew was that she was practically glowing blue and there was a faint buzzing sound from her direction.
"Elenora," was all he could manage as his brain raced for any clue as to what was going on.
Elenora could tell he didn't know what to do. She could tell that he was just as clueless as she was, but Elenora didn't mind. She was just very, very glad she didn't have this meltdown near her fathers or any other Avengers.
The drive here with Natasha was quite enough for her.
Despite having known them longer, Elenora didn't think they'd be quite as understanding. And the last thing she wanted was to be shoved in a secluded cell until they could figure out why she couldn't stop shaking.
It took him a few moments, but Charles was finally coming out of shock and to his senses, his hands finding the wheels of his chair and pushing himself away from his desk and towards Elenora.
All she could think of was how he was going to get hurt, and before she realized it, Elenora was instinctively shouting, "Don't!" and taking a step back, pushing out her hands.
Waves of energy thrust out of her hands, knocking everything off of Charles' desk and sending papers all over the place.
Charles could feel a pure power hit his face. It was harsh and strong and full, and something told Charles that this wasn't spontaneous. This force had been piling up for some time now.
Elenora expected him to be scared. She excepted him to yell or gulp or widen his eyes or anything that proved she was truly losing it.
But he did none of that.
For some reason, he did none of that and it scared Elenora even more.
The trinkets on the bookshelves began to fall, and despite it being her own doing, Elenora jumped away from the cases, fisting her hands to keep from doing it again.
"Elenora," Charles called, this time a lot calmer. Elenora didn't realize before, but she liked his voice. It was soothing, really. It reminded her a lot of the breeze and trees and lemon drops and oh, no, please not another one-
For the past twelve hours, Elenora had been having these weird flashbacks. She knew it was from when she was a baby - before she was given up - but she didn't know how she remembered them. or why now. Or why it gave her so much of these energetic particles.
Charles' desk started moving.
"I don't mean to be doing this," Elenora promised, her voice desperate and genuine.
Charles knew this. He nodded, and just as he opened his mouth to speak, Logan barged in the room, likely alerted by the thuds and crashes.
"Charles," he said, in a warning voice, his eyes trying not to maintain a stare at Elenora - he knew to stare only made these types of things worse. But he was worried, and that was evident in his tone.
"I'm so sorry!" Elenora cried out, and Logan turned to look at her. She got worried he was going to take a step towards her, and instinctively went to throw her arms out, but thought better of it, forcing them behind her back.
The bookshelves behind her got another jolt.
"No worries, Kid," Logan promised, trying not to seem very concerned with the situation at hand. "Not my first go at these meltdowns."
"Logan," Charles warned, trying to keep a calm face. His expression reminded Logan that he was not to in any way distress the student at hand, and his comment about "meltdowns" was not proving to abide by that rule.
"I thought she flickered?" Logan questioned as he grabbed the backing of the chairs set in front of Charles' desk, and dragged them against the walls.
He was preparing, Elenora realized. He had been through this before and he knew it was going to get messy.
How messy was it going to get? That question worried Elenora even more, and now more bookshelves were moving.
"They're anchored to the wall," Charles told her as he struggled to keep his voice steady.
To Elenora, her uncle's voice was calm and predictable. She couldn't tell he was thinking about the first time Beatrice had one of these.
"That's good," she said, the words forced from the back of her throat as pressure built in her whole body. Charles and Logan exchanging a look before the professor continued to move the furniture around. Away, really.
Away from Elenora to be more specific.
She tried to shake the thought out of her mind physically, and then mentioned Logan's previous comment. "About the flickering," Elenora said, her voice shakey like the physical shape of the room at the moment. "Why isn't it happening?"
the fact that she wasn't invisible made Elenora even more nervous. Now the small table in the middle of the room was trembling just like Elenora.
It fell off of its legs, and Elenora tried not to listen to the thud as it hit the ground.
"I would suggest we go somewhere else," Charles tested, watching the way Elenora's blue eyes widened at the idea. As Elenora swallowed hard, Charles squinted in thought and added, "but I assume that's not plausible."
Elenora sheepishly shrugged, then said, "It was very hard to get here without pushing cars off the road. I don't want to know what I could do to the seventh graders."
"So considerate," Logan said as he fought for control of the coffee table.
Elenora rolled her eyes - at least he was treating her somewhat normal.
"How long has this been happening?" Charles questioned, pulling Elenora's attention away from Logan's task of clearing the room.
Furrowing her eyebrows, Elenora tried to grasp for a reasonable answer - she wasn't sure what would make her seem like she was crazy for not getting help sooner or what would make her even crazier if this sprouted from nothing.
"This morning," she decided, but her hesitation was enough to tip off Charles' instinct. His expression was enough to prompt Elenora to keep speaking. "This morning was when I stopped being able to control it."
"You've experienced these surges before?" Charles asked, and Elenora bit her lip and nodded. She couldn't deny it, and it wasn't even like she could really get in trouble. "Since when?"
"Uh," Elenora said like she was really in thought. Logan, who knew this move very well, let out a matter of a few choice insults. Charles just watched her warily. "Last Tuesday," she recalled, her eyes falling to Charles as she nodded. "Definitely last Tuesday."
"And anything that prompts them?" Charles asked, his left hand wandering to his desk, fiddling with something. Elenora didn't notice - her eyes were tied to the ceiling as she searched for the common denominator.
"Oh!" she exclaimed, another burst of force, this time nearly hitting Logan straight on.
He sent her a very pointed look.
"Sorry," she apologized defensively, then turned to her uncle. "People are keeping secrets, and I don't like it."
"Lovely," Charles said at the same time Logan said, "Teenage angst."
Squeezing her eyes shut, Elenora frustratedly requested, "Real supportive, thanks."
"Well, it's not anger that drives you," Charles began, and Elenora had to resist rolling her eyes - the last thing she needed in the middle of this was a therapy session. "We decided the flickering was caused by fear."
"Well, there's no flickering!" Elenora reminded him, her voice growing less and less patient with every moment. And it wasn't all her fault - it was like dateline was racing through her, but unlike dateline, this wasn't going away.
Not to mention it was ten times stronger.
"Elenora this is caused by fear," Charles said, his own tone surer now. Elenora's eyes met her uncle's, and she nodded slowly, letting herself believe that maybe he was right. "Whatever secrets are being kept, Elenora, are they scaring you?"
She had to think about it, and it wasn't because she was trying to convince herself that Charles was wrong or trying to think about a way to lie.
Elenora was thinking about it, and it didn't take her long to realize Charles was right: she was terrified.
All her life, it felt like Elenora had more questions than answers. It was life even though the sun came out every morning, Elenora was always in the dark. Steve changed that. Bucky changed that.
And now, with everything going on, it threatened to come back.
It felt like everything she didn't know posed a brand new threat.
Like Devon had.
Instead of confirming or agreeing or just giving nod, Elenora demanded, "who told you to give me up?"
The room started shaking again, but Elenora's voice was no longer shaking with it. She was stern now. Assertive. Aggressive. Her tone told Charles that she knew exactly what she was doing - even if she didn't - and that she wasn't going to back down.
Logan stopped his motions instantly, his eyes darting from the chair to Elenora to Charles.
Though Charles couldn't quite explain it, Elenoras state was growing worse by the second. It was like the blue glow around her was getting strong and lighter. Like the feeling in the air was being altered by her.
"Why do you ask that?" Charles questioned, his eyebrows furrowing. Trying not to fuel her aggression anymore, he didn't dare to look towards Logan, trying to keep full attention on him.
because the second Elenora would steal a glance at Logan, she'd know just who told Charles.
"You promised me answers," she told him, her teeth gritting as she attempted to hold back more power than was being her released. "And I - I think I need them, now."
Charles needed more time. He knew that it would always feel like he needed more time but right then, with Elenora losing control and the person she'd surely take it out on in one room, Charles needed more time.
And so he talked. "I assure you, Elenora, that I would never simply give you up-"
As much as she would do for her uncle, Elenora didn't have any time to give him. She couldn't wait. She needed answers then, not in two weeks. Not in three months. Right then and there.
Right, where she was certain he had the conversation that forced him to give up.
(She wasn't sure how she knew this, but Elenora was about 97% sure that it was in his office, and she was there in a playpen with a stuffed elephant.)
Not that she knew, but Elenora was right. She was there the day Charles made the decision. She was there, in his office, while Charles listened very closely to his friend break the news to him.
All Elenora was missing was the memory of Logan being there.
He wasn't the calmest person, and he wasn't always rational. Logan didn't have a good track record with students' feelings or thinking plans through, but he must have known exactly what he was doing when he leaned over to Charles, whispering, "Call Peter" before stepping in front of the man and announcing to his friend's child, "It was me."
Her shoulders fell. Her face relaxed before a confused look set on it. The power that was coming from her hands slowed down, and the shaking and glowing did as well.
"You?"
Charles had heard a lot of voices in his head, and out loud, too.
And none of them sounded as absolutely heartbroken as his niece's as she discovered that the reason she'd been unhappy for years was because of her favorite professor.
Logan didn't say anything. he didn't have to. Elenora knew it was him - he could tell by her expression that she believed it.
For a moment, Logan and Charles thought that Elenora had calmed down. That the surges were over and done with and that everything would go back to Regular Elenora - sweet, happy, shy -but just as Logan and Charles' eyes adjusted to the new lighting, Elenora's glow got lighter, brighter, and stronger, and they were forced to squint in her direction.
"How dare you?" Elenora screamed, her voice high, pitchy, and strained. All at once, she could remember everything that ever happened in her foster homes - every bad thing - and all she could think was: this is his fault.
Objects were now clearly aimed at Logan.
Her voice was loud and forceful enough that it, along with the clashes and bangs, altered passing students in the hallways, who paused and watched each other with careful stares. Almost simultaneously, all students began moving away from the headmaster's office and to their dorms.
All students except for two.
Logan wasn't scared. He'd witnessed a lot of angry, powerful mutants in his day and a sixteen-year-old wasn't exactly the most concerning. Some flying furniture seemed to be the least of his problems lately.
Elenora didn't like his calm demeanor. She didn't like how his flinches were minimal - he didn't even think she was a threat.
Her hand rose - she would make sure he knew she was strong.
Elenora yelled, feeling the rush of energy and the force in her veins, in her voice, but just before it hit anyone, Elenora couldn't breathe.
Everything was blurry.
And soaking.
***
Elenora was cold and wet.
She was also very sad.
Three minutes after Peter M tackled her into the lake - which released all of her energy in one massive splash - he brought her out a towel as per Charles' request.
Sometime in the mess of getting Elenora out of the lake, Logan had slipped away. Elenora couldn't blame him. She wouldn't have stayed around long if a student tried to attack her over something that happened fourteen years prior.
In his niece's best interest, Charles had turned away Bridgit and Connor, both of who rushed into Charles' office the second they spotted Natasha frigging Romanoff sitting on a bench in the hallway.
Elenora had never felt such a loss of control in her life - it was like she was possessed or something. Like it wasn't her.
It was really like a switch.
But it was her. it had to be, and she reminded herself of that. it was her fault. She had lost all control and no one was to blame but her.
Charles didn't need to read her mind to know his niece was wallowing in self-hatred.
"I thought you'd be glad to know the table has been repaired," Charles' voice broke the silence.
Not having expected it, her uncle's voice made Elenora nearly jump out of her skin. She was always really jumpy, lately, but more so around Charles since the night she visited.
Elenora didn't look back. She didn't think she could stomach it.
"I'm sorry," she said not breaking her eyes away from the lake ahead of her. It was serene and stable. Everything she wasn't. Even when she thought things were calm, they just got bad again. it would always happen to her.
Charles assumed she wouldn't look at him because of the tears welling in her blue eyes.
"I didn't mean to cause such a mess."
"It's hardly a mess, Elenora."
She said nothing in reply.
Instead, she pulled her legs closer to her chest, blades of grass brushing against her as she shifted. Elenora wondered if her mom would be disappointed in her. She wasn't sure.
After a minute, Elenora told Charles, "I could remember things. things I never have before."
"Hm?"
"I could remember my mom and you and Devon."
Charles turned to Elenora, and she finally met his eyes. "It happened the first day you came," Charles reminded her. "Aggressive memory. A mutant thing."
Elenora shook her head because this was different. "It's not like that."
"No?"
"No," Elenora said. "It was stronger. Harsher. Like I needed to remember so I could create more energy or something."
'Why didn't you tell me when this began?" Charles demanded, his voice stern but warm. he could have helped her - she had t have known that. There were an abundance of students who had experienced things just like this, and if he had let her, she could have been in a better state. For the first time in her grown life, Charles could have been there for her.
But she didn't reach out.
She shrugged. "I thought I could handle it myself."
"You don't need to handle it yourself, Elenora."
"Yes, I do," she stressed, wiping away a few tears with her towel. Even the stupid fabric of the towel reminded her of something. "After the night- her birthday-"
"That wasn't your fault."
"I should have known."
"No one ever told you, Elenora."
She wanted to believe him. She really did but something couldn't click with her.
With wide eyes, Elenora looked up to Charles, begging him to forgive her.
But there was nothing to forgive. And even if there was, Charles would have forgiven her a million times over if he never had to see that look on her again.
He told her and brushed her hair from her eyes.
"I wish you never gave me up," Elenora admitted suddenly, surprising herself. "You should have kept me."
"You would have died, Elenora."
"You could have protected me," Elenora argued, her eyes nearly piercing Charles. "You could have gotten Steve to take me-"
"It doesn't work that way-"
"Who says?" she demanded, anger seeping back into her tone. "Who says it wouldn't work? Logan? So what - he goes back in time once and suddenly he knows every possible outcome-"
"I'm not saying that-" Charles disagreed, but Elenora didn't stop.
"It'd be better to have stayed with my family and in danger than to be abandoned."
"You were never abandoned," Charles insisted, his voice firm. Reassuring. "I may not have been there in sight, but I was there. Steve was, too."
"You should have just taken me home."
"You needed to stay far from us."
"I wanted a family. That's all I wanted."
Elenora's voice didn't crack. it didn't break.
It completely shattered.
And possibly the only thing in the whole world that could put her back together again was Charles saying, "I wanted you with me more than anything."
Elenora had never cried on someone's shoulder as fiercely or emotionally as she did to Charles - she was half on the ground and half slung across Charles' lap.
***
After she had cried all the tears she could manage, Elenora and Charles walked back into the school, where Elenora was immediately encased in hugs by both Bridgit and Connor.
Both of who had been waiting by the door with Natasha since Elenora had gotten dunked in the lake.
"Woah? Hugs in public? Is this really my Connor?"
"S-shut up, El."
As for her soaking state, Bridgit found a pair of sweatpants in her room, and Charles gave her an old sweater of his. Both items were big and baggy but were nice and warm for a cold school and a drenched girl.
When she was all changed, her, Connor and Bridgit all gathered into the kitchens, where Natasha was with Charles who had decided to break out his super-secret stash of ice cream he only used for "emergencies". He split it amongst the five of them.
Elenora took a bite and immediately asked, "Is this raspberry?"
Charles nodded, his own mind drifting back to summer days with his sister and her child and ice cream by the lake. Elenora couldn't remember that, of course, but the fact that she could name the flavor was enough to give him a little hope.
Bridgit and Elenora met stares. "That makes so much sense!" they announced in unison, both remembering every single time Steve or Bucky brought Elenora a raspberry cream soda and Bridgit an Orange slushie whenever they hung out.
Connor, Charles, and Natasha all shared a look of their own.
"Guess we know where that obsession started," Natasha remarked, taking a spoonful of ice cream to hide the growing smile on her face.
Elenora sent her a playful glare but said nothing as she continued eating her favorite flavor ice cream.
At some point after two bowls of ice cream, Natasha and Charles excused themselves - probably to find Logan, Connor assumed - and they instructed the teen' to wash the dishes before they left the kitchens.
As they walked out, Bridgit was grumbling about how unfair it was that she had to wash the dishes when they contributed to the mess, but the second the door closed behind the two adults, she whipped out the hidden phone, sending Connor into a panic.
"Ah!" he strained, throwing out his hands. "C-can you try to be discreet?"
Bridgit rolled her eyes and popped her spoon out of her mouth. "Relax. I just want to show El here everything she's been missing out on."
"Missing out on?" El repeated, suppressing a yawn as she leaned forward in her chair at the prep counter of the kitchen. It was clear to the adults and the teens that Elenora was close to falling asleep. She yawned a lot and her eyes were drooping - it was clear that having a mental breakdown had its effects on a mutant.
Despite the state of her friend, Bridgit plowed through, taking another spoonful of ice cream as she handed the phone to Elenora.
"With Cooper?" she guessed, her eyes falling on the abundance of text message bubbles that seemed to be blurry without her glasses.
Connor and Bridgit waited patiently as Elenora scrolled through, each sending each other dirty looks and then shoving each other.
"A winky face? Dang Connor."
"Shut up, El, or I swear-"
With a roll of her eyes, Bridgit busted in. "Do you see how he avoids every question about the news?" she pointed out, and Elenora nodded silently. "It was totally him."
"I agree," she said, breaking out into another yawn before she placed her hands on the surface of the metal table, propping herself to a stand. "I'm tired."
Connor was the first to rush to his feet, but Bridgit followed shortly after him.
"Do you think you can spend the night?" Bridgit asked, trying to mask the excitement in her voice. She needed to get better at that - she didn't want to seem clingy to El. Especially not in front of the Avengers.
Elenora thought for a moment, then shook her head. "My dads will be back home tomorrow," she said. "They'd probably freak if they saw me missing.' Bridgit and Connor nodded. "But," she continued you, Bridgit's head snapping up. "If I fall asleep here, I doubt they'll wake me up when I have to get to the car."
"Smart thinking," Bridgit praised, a grin breaking out as she followed Connor out into the hallway and into Bridgit and Elenora's old room.
"I'm going to head to bed tp," Connor said when they stopped at the dorm room. Bridgit nodded and ducked into her own room, leaving Connor and Elenora alone.
"I hope you feel better," Connor said suddenly, and Elenora looked up to him with a cocked head. "I know what it's like to lose control. Empty feelings afterward. The dull, aching stuff. I-I'm always here if you need me. Just a call away. Seriously."
He didn't need to add that last part. Elenora knew he was serious. His entire body showed it - the way he stood, the way his shoulder bent slightly, and the way his eyes followed Elenora not with caution, but with concern.
"Thank you, Little Brother," Elenora teased.
Connor scoffed, then laughed. "You need to stop that."
"I don't think I will."
"And if I said it's embarrassing?"
"You'd be lying. me being your older sister is like thousands of coolness points."
Elenora was right that no one would wake her up. When Charles, Natasha and hesitant Logan came to get her, they didn't wake her up.
Natasha carried her.
They walked the two all the way to the car, and Elenora, who was slightly stirring in her sleep, decided not to question it. She was growing up - she only had so many more times she could fake sleep and get away with it.
Elenora was at a school for mutants, and she learned things.
She learned that those closest to you could hurt you the most.
She learned that sometimes it's better not to remember good moments; they only make you want more.
And somewhere in New York City, someone else was learning, too.
But their lessons were less moral. Less good.
Because on the same night that Elenora learned what really happened, someone else was learning how to control mutants.
How to make them lose control.
As important as Elenora's lessons were, that was much, much more revolutionary.