Here's Astrid's POV I hope you guys like it
Astrid's POV
Another year passed, Berk has been living in a peaceful harmony for five years. No raids, no dragons, no trouble. It's less exciting to be honest but we did not waste our to train. You never know what or who'll attack next.
It has also been a few months after Trader Johan had step foot on Berk to bring us fresh weapons and stuff. Not to mention he brought us news about a man helping sort out dragon raids and Hiccup's whereabouts.
Hiccup.....
It's been five years since he left. I don't know why I should pity him, maybe because he's weak......Or maybe because he does not belong to any of us. I'm not like the others, I don't tease him just ignoring him. Yes I know he had caused a lot of trouble in Berk but why do I have to say bad things about him.
The first time I met Hiccup he was small, shy even. I thought there was something wrong with him because he was different, much different than his father. Somehow when I looked at his eyes he seemed so.....unique.
Back at the forge when we where still twelve, us teens were forced to carry battle axe and swords to get ready for training once we hit the age of fourteen. Hiccup, by the way, was assigned at the forge by his father and Gobber. I feel sorry for him he can't join us but I think it was for the best. One time I needed my axe sharpened before training, I was hoping Gobber could make a little adjustments. It was Hiccup who I saw. I knew I had no other choice but to let him do the work.
"You're axe seems to be loose or something" that was the first time I heard him talk to me.
"Yeah....it's been like that since I used it in training"
"Hmm let's see what I could do"
That time I waited for my axe to be fixed and sharpen. I explored the forge, this was my first time to have a peek without Gobber in it. I noticed a door way covered by a curtain, I open it and there I saw papers.....everywhere! On the desk, on the wall, some scattered on the floor almost everywhere were papers with weird drawings.
"Wow Gobber's been busy all along"
"Woah woah I-I won't go t-there if I were you"
I gave him a curious look. "Why not?"
"Cuz it's messy and I little private-"
"I could see that, it's not like I wanted to linger Gobber's stuff-"
"Mine actually" He cut me off and I was dumbfounded. So I asked "Those drawings were all yours?"
There were silence for a few seconds till he nodded.
As he was done I was a bit surprised myself, he adjusted the blade to make it tight enough so the blade won't fall off the pole. He also made a comfy handle for me to have a good grip. The blade was really sharpened alright till I noticed it was polished too.
"Ok here you go......just made a few twicks on it for good measures"
I smiled as he handed the axe to me "thanks". What lighten me up was that loopsided grin he had on his face as a response . "Y-y-your welcome" he stuttred. I knew he was gonna say something but the gang were out there looking for me, so I left in there air hanging on to what he was suppose to say.
That was the first decent conversation I had with him before he started causing trouble with his inventions. To me it wasn't bad at all, I mean they were good, bad luck never leaves his side though. I wanted to complement but I was afraid people would judge me for siding up to who are wrong, they expected better of me. That's when I started to ignore it already. There were days he wanted to have a conversation with me, I wanted to but my pride just couldn't I wanted to keep my status. Maybe those were the days he grew a crush on me and I hurt his feelings for ignoring him. And I think he did the same for me.
It's not that I like him....it's just I treated him badly. I have no idea what kind of emotion should I have. I feel angry but sad for him, I feel pity him but praise his bravery for trusting a dragon, I feel like I hate him for running away but misses his funny loopsided grin. I'm disappointed at him but I felt guilt to myself.
Oh for the love of Thor why am I even thinking of him. I'm supposed to forget all about him, I should never feel guilt because it's really his fault not trying hard to be a viking. I should be angry at him not angry to at myself. It's not my fault.
Now I wonder, when did I even start thinking of him? Oh yeah I'm holding his dagger that I picked from the arena five years ago. Also today is his feast. I could not believe that jerk of a Snot asked his father Spitelout to make a good-bye-for-good-Hiccup feast. And Stoick had agreed to it absentmindly, now he's gonna remember every scene he has to remember.
It has been like that for five years during the feast, Stoick wouldn't celebrate with the others. Instead he sits at his throne alone at the arena and stares the same spot where Hiccup stood. It hurts me to see him suffer. He is, after all living alone with no other family member to fill his happiness. As if he lost his whole family in a war and he was the only sole survivor of this tragedy. He rarely goes out, leaving Gobber doing the chiefing duty and oftenly asks me to help him out.
While Gobber was far too busy, I was in charge for training the gang and the others. It was tough to be honest so I asked for Fishlegs's help. I'd rather take Fishlegs as an assistant than Snotlout.
Everyone honored me as a shield maiden because of the Monstrous Nightmare I defeated three years ago. It ranked me as a full fledged viking warrior of Berk, a chance to be the next heir to the throne. But to me it was nothing to be proud of. I didn't know the dragon I just beat up died a few days later. The village celebrated but I was not happy with it.
They didn't even noticed that my left arm was badly burnt until someone hold a grip on it and I screamed with pain. Gothi and the rest of the healers treated my arm, the healers say I was lucky for it was only a second degree burn. To me it would only remind me of a dragon I killed. That night I was crying as if I killed someone. As if I killed Hiccup too. That mark, that burnt mark would only tell that I'm the real monster. That I'm a killer.
Yes I have dreamt that someday I could get to kill a dragon, but after what happened with Hiccup, everything dawned to me. It wasn't right.
The conversation we had, he said he stayed with that night fury for weeks and nothing happened. I've thought that maybe everything would work out if we gave it a shot. That day, that day when we had our last conversation. He left me hanging when he said he loves me. LOVED he said, so maybe he hates me right now.
What if I didn't told Stoick, what if I stayed, what if I listened. Would he show me how it feels to ride a dragon? What if he stayed, what if dragons were kept as pets, what would happen to both of us?y
What ifs......what would
I sat kneeled as I faced the setting sun holding his dagger and vest. I dunno what went to me but I just wanted to hold on to what's left of him. Every time his feast turns up I come to this cliff where I last saw him flew away. I was thankful to the gods that he was still alive for three years and hoping he stays safe. Johan's news was a good start, at least from that point I knew he's still alive.
I still have the chance to apologize.
I regret everything I've done. His life is ruined thanks to me. Even though I knew it was everyone's fault too but I played the critical one. I told everyone and it's entirely my fault. But why do I even had the right to be mad at him? Why?..why?...why?
A tear slipped through my eye, every single tear in every single moment that I stay on this cliff. I looked down at his dagger, he has such good hands. He crafted the handle by himself but the blade remains as a hand me down from Haddock the First. I hugged his vest so tight, inhaling his only scent I could remember. I almost sold it to Johan and I would bang myself if I ever trade it by mistake, as if he told me to keep it for good measures.
It was getting dark and cold, I could feel the night creeping by the second. I stood up from my spot and took one last look at the setting sun. Just like the day he left, I remained on this cliff and watched him disappear before I knelt on my knees silently begging him to come back.
Someday I'll stare at this same sun set, forgiven
I stopped by at the arena's gates, I could see Stoick sitting on his throne with Gobber. Their heads bowed down and sobs can be heard from the chief, Gobber on the other hand comforted him celebrating his feast sadly.
I walked through the plaza slowly. It was empty and from the distance the music and laughter can be heard from the Great Hall. There was no day on Hiccup's feast that I celebrated with them. They invited me numerous times but I declined, ending Snotlout's arm twisted the last time he forced me.
For me the feast was a total insult, not to Hiccup, but to me and very much to Stoick. Once the gang realized I wanted to be alone on this day, they let me be or they might end up like Snotlout. Fishlegs did consider it as insult too but his parents forces him to, anyways he knew he couldn't resist so he had to obey. Sometimes Ruff would consider my feelings, but the fact she's a trouble-maker and loves to eat out she wouldn't miss a single feast.
My feet led me to a hill, I was deep in thought till I realized I was climbing the steps to a certain house. I looked up and it was the chief and Hiccup's house. Their house used to be bright and warm, I could even see Hiccup's room from my home. Sometimes I wonder what's he up to during the late hours of the night, probably drawing something. And to my surprise he was.
~~<>~~<>~~<>~~<>
About a few months after Hiccup left, I had his furry vest and dagger with me. My instincts wanted me to return Hiccup's things to his father, but my heart screams to keep it with me till he comes back, if ever he comes back. The house seems empty when I came, the door was left ajar. I tried to knocked but the wind pushed the door to give me full access.
"Hello?" I waited for a minute till no one answered my call, Stoick must have been out for the day. It's my second time around inside. The first was when I chased him around.
I could see the stairs that led up to his room, as if by force, my feet and was curious to have a good look at his room. The house was dusty and untidy as I went up the stairs. Pieces of paper were laying on everystep, Stocik must be really depressed to tidy up his house. I finally reached the last stair, slowly I opened the door. The first thing I've imagine of his room was nothing but his inventions and lots and lots and lots of paper hanging around.
Then again I was wrong. He kept his room tidy, his trash bin was over flowing though. Some of his clothes were scattered on the floor. He was packing that day, he might not have gotten enough clothes to fill him in. His blanket, neatly fold on top of his bed. He made sure the four corners of his wall was clean, only his desk were full of papers and the wall against it were drawings of.........me?
My eyes widen, I couldn't believe what I'm looking at exactly. There were two...wait three...no several...hold on, a BUNCH of drawings of ME! And they were all beautiful, beautiful because they were made by his artistic hands. My hand covered my mouth as I looked at every drawing he made. There was a drawing he drew when I was starring out of my window. Then another one of me leaning all my weight to my axe. Then another when I had two braids way back when we were little.
The last drawing I saw was me putting on the brightest smile I had, probably this might be the day when I first smiled at him when he fixed my axe.
I could feel tears forming, I couldn't hold on to it so I let my dam flow.
He cares, he actually cares about me. After all this time
"Hiccup! Hiccup I'm so sorry!!"
My cries were getting desperate and loud.
It's my fault, it's my fault
I fell to my knees, I hold on to his vest so tight. My eyes hurt as they become red and puffy. The brave Astrid Hofferson has finally shed tears to someone's life she ruined.
"Hello? Is somebody up there ?"
I heard Stoick's voice booming around the house. "Hault! Who goes there? Show yoursel!!" Stoick was now climbing up the stairs.
I quickly stood up and ran fast to the window, I gave out a relieved sigh as Hiccup's escape route was still hanging. I quickly climbed down and ran as fast as I could away from Stoick's sight.
~~<>~~<>~~<>~~
Here I am now at his room again, I made sure this part of the house would stay clean and neat. All those dust bunnies and cob webs are now gone, his papers were neatly piled and there were no paper on his wall. I filed every drawing he had with me on it in a scrapbook that I found under his bed.
The cover page was Berk's symbol and a letter H signature at the bottom.
Stoick agreed to let me enter his room. He said that he trusts me with Hiccup's things, and I did my part. I made sure no one would ever touch his stuff nor trade them to Johan. I'll personally cut there head off.
Yearly, at his feast, I'd go to his room right after coming from the cliff. To me it feels like he's just around here, his presence can be felt in his sanctuary. Sometimes I imagine he is physically present showing me that goofy smile plastered on his face.
It was getting pretty late, Stoick hasn't come back yet. I couldn't just leave the house. Maybe if I waited a little.
So I walked towards Hiccup's bed. It was definitely comfy for a viking. I tried to lie down and starred up. I opened the scrap book, to be honest I didn't just put all of my face in it, but I put some of his too. I wished there was a drawing of him where I could look at his emerald eyes. Too bad there wasn't.
It's like I'm a thief stealing his drawing. I never grew tired looking at it, it feels so amazing for him to do such thing. Then again, would he ever forgive me once we crossed paths?
By this time I was really afraid of rejection, his rejection to be exact. And maybe if ever we're all right we might start over again. As friends, not in a relationship
Oh Freyja no, don't do this to me. He deserves someone else other than me. If ever he's alive though.
My mind's getting tired, but I need to stay awake until Stoick comes home. But Hiccup's bed is too comfy for me to rest in. Minutes later after my mind debates whether to wake or sleep, my eyes finally shut me down to dreamland.
Dreaming of Hiccup in a drawing with me
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Zem feels, zem feeeeeeeeeeeeeels
I cant believe I just made threee chapters in two days. Now that's a record for me....lols 😆
Dah! I cant feel mi fingers( i'm going crazy here)
How...was..it...people?
To be honest, its like i'm confused whether Astrid does have feelings for Hiccup in my story. Sorry if I confuse you guys, crazy writer here I'm on hyper mode. ✌️
As promised thank you very very much to
@Wolfygrace
@Secretlynerd
@HICCSTRIDLOVER19
and
@MajaPejovska
for voting, adding and most of all reading my story. You guys are le awesome people :3
I'll update the next sonn, and its gonna be a good one