Reminder
This is a MUSIC-BASED BOOK and I've tried my best to time the music the best I could. If you want the full experience of "Limelight" then please press the video and enjoy.
August 20th
Do you know what a breaking point is? The moment of greatest strain that just defeats a person.
Delilah knew she had come to that point as she stood on Valentina's fire escape singing Stevie Wonder's Lately.
" Lately, I have had the strangest feeling with no vivid reason here to find." She sang softly under her breath.
Delilah always wondered how it would be if she ever met her real mother. She always wanted to know if she would be mad, happy, or sad.
Strangely, she was all three. Furious because her mother had been there all along, relieved at last to know who she was, sad from the lies.
She was staying at Valentina's. Curtis and Barbra were the only other two who knew where she was. Delilah didn't know if Michael received her messages, she sent him two since she saw him at the dinner three days ago.
She needed to hear his voice telling her that things would be okay like he assured her on the rooftop that day, but he still hadn't called after those emotional messages she left him. Crying about how she needed him.
Delilah never truly knew depression until now. She would lay in Valentina's bed all day, either sleep or in deep thought but today she thought so much she began to suffocate.
The images of Alyssa still plagued her mind — good memories leaving tear stains on her face and nightmares leaving her restless even if she'd been asleep.
Throughout the past year so much had happened... she met the love of her life, branched out of her shell, saw the world ... yet this is what she was left with? Dreadfulness and sorrow.
" Things was supposed to change for us Alyssa... we was supposed to get outta here together." she took a deep breath to hold back more tears.
" And you still can." she heard not even bothering to turn around, she already knew who was sitting on the window ledge, Curtis.
Delilah let out a sigh of disinterest. " Oh yeah? How is that?"
Curtis stepped out and joined her on the fire escape as the sunset shone a golden glow upon him. " I been waiting for the right time, Honey ... Sorry for invading your alone time but it's good to see you finally getting some fresh air." Curtis paused as he pulled the business card he had been saving out of his pocket, Dezzel Crane's. " Have you been ignoring Robert Flack's calls? You know he been tryna get ahold of you."
" Why, so he can just say he sorry like everybody else?"
Curtis shook his head. " You're not the only one hurting Honey, other people are mourning too. I know you got more shit to be hurt about though but don't shut the people out that's just tryna help." he sighed while watching her basically disregard his presence. " Um you know, we been talking a lot about you – me and Robert, about opportunities for you."
" No." Delilah rolled her eyes then glanced at him over her shoulder. " I don't want an opportunity I had plenty of those ... I want something solid, something legit."
" And it will be, trust me. No matter what I'm still your uncle. " he walked next to her and pulled the cigar from behind his ear. " I got you."
...
Day after wretched day Michael spent in the studio whether his home studio or one of the many at Limelight Records. Nothing about this album made sense to him, it would be finished soon and he hated that. It was too rushed too soon – no artist no matter how good could make an album in so little time. At least a good one.
Despite his brothers putting in majority of the hours with him — the task itself was still weighing down on him.
He had no time to think of anything, the rambling in his head was becoming a hindrance to his sleep. Michael had been up since the night before stressed beyond his imagination.
Michael was running on pure adrenaline and his obsession with being the best with everything he touched.
Marlon came thumping down the steps. " Shit Michael come upstairs now Joseph is gonna kill Randy!"
The loud crash prompted them to sprint up the stairs at lightning speed, racing around the corners until they saw Tito and Jackie trying to hold Joseph back from Randy, who was cowering behind the living room's couch.
" You fucking idiot! You fool!" Joseph raged as Michael stood still and in confusion until Marlon gritted lowly through his teeth.
" Remember Randy told us that the baby wasn't his ... well, Keisha sent a DNA test with a letter attached to it ... she's suing."
Keisha left Man Killa's place and found a trick, Sane, to provide for her and her son for the time being until her scorn got the best of her. Randy introduced her to the drugs, he impregnated her, then he left and for that, she was going to make him pay.
Michael's heart dropped as Joseph broke out of their grip suddenly. " She's gonna drain us of everything we got! " he yanked Randy by the collar just as the front door opened and in came Janet and Ms.Katherine.
" Oh my-" " Joseph! " they exclaimed throwing their purses down before darting their way.
Michael's eyes bulged as he found himself unable to react, watching Joseph choking Randy to the extent where Randy's eyes rolled white. It sent old memories in Michael's mind.
" You ruined every fucking thing! "
" Joseph stop — you stop this right now! " Katherine's voice screamed to a crack and almost immediately Joseph swung towards her, his fist connecting to her jaw causing everyone to shout.
" Ma! " Michael hollered rushing over to her once her head hit the carpet.
" Have you fucking went mad man? " Jackie raged as Tito restrained him against the wall.
Joseph stared down at her with wide eyes as she sobbed. " You promised never again... you promised never to hit me again."
" What?" Michael mumbled as his eyes snapped to Joseph.
" I told you, you promised." she sobbed as everyone watched her twist her ring off before throwing it near Joseph's feet.
" Kattie," Joseph called after her as she stepped back towards the door.
" Ma please don't leave," Michael begged but she was already heading out the door.
" Mother! " he followed her, racing into the golden sunset trying to prevent her from leaving. He never saw her move so fast, her childhood illness no longer impacting her legs as she rushed into one of their cars.
" Ma! " he wailed one last time, however, he was only left with the screeching of the car tires and the smoke fogging his view.
...
August 29th
Michael
I waited for her arrival on the first day, along with the second and third, then by the fourth day I heard Joseph crying alone in their master bedroom. Now today was the ninth day and I came to the conclusion that I wouldn't see her for a while.
I couldn't let her words go. He promised her to never do it again, yet we were never aware that he had ever put his hands on her. My body's heat increased just thinking about it, just imagining him hitting her the way he hit me, my brothers.
Mama always told me to be a gentleman, to never hurt a woman, never treat her like the scum of the earth. She told me most of the time in tears at a young age, and it scared me. I thought it was because of the women he brought into the house, hotel rooms, and tour buses... now I see it wasn't just that.
She always told me I was different, special even, and I could sense that it made her feel guilty for holding me on a higher pedestal than the rest of my brothers. Everything was becoming clear to me now, I remember when Janet and I just reached sixteen years old and mama confessed late that night while waiting up for Joseph that she was proud of me for I was nothing like him.
I turned over on my right as my thoughts were interrupted by the phone ringing for the third time today, once in the morning, another in the afternoon, and now that the clock struck eight at night.
Sluggishly I made my way over, answering it on the third ring. It didn't take me long to recognize Delilah's delicate voice. " Hey, Michael."
For some reason, my heart spiked a bit. I sat down in my rolling chair and pinched the bridge of my nose. " Hey." my voice came out more hoarse than I imagined, lately, the only time I used my voice was when singing.
" I um, look I know you don't really celebrate your birthday but you're twenty now and ... I think we should at least do somethin' tonight. Dinner, a movie, we can even just talk somewhere - looking at the stars in the sky... I remember you said you always wanted to do that." she was rambling and she knew that. I did miss her but I still need space — at least right now.
" I'm busy, you know the album." I lied, sighing at the silence on the other end. " I'm sorry I wish I could."
"Nah, I understand you got a lot going on."
" I truly am sorry Spar-" the sound of the call ending caused my jaw to clench while my eyes closed until suddenly my door opened - revealing Janet's frowning face.
She closed the door and folded her arms across her chest. " If my calculations are correct I could've sworn the album was done about three days ago."
" Don't even start, and what I tell you about eavesdropping?" I glared as she checked her nails with pursed lips.
" Actually I wasn't I was just about to make a call - I'm twenty today too so I decided to go out, which is exactly what you should be doing."
Not wanting to hear her I spun around in the chair as if that would stop her from speaking to me.
" Look, Michael... I know this shit with the family and the music business is really getting to you. But that don't mean you need to make yourself suffer on top of that. I can't keep watching you in this robotic state –staying up all night, barely eating, and in the studio for hours unbelievable. Randy, I love him but he did this shit to himself and Mama she's smart as hell okay she got away from Joseph ... she's taking a step towards happiness and you need to do the same, and I ain't neva seen you so happy like you are with Delilah... Michael look at me."
A warm tear trickled down my face and I immediately wiped it before doing as told. " I love you and I want you to be happy - I wanna see that smile." she poked my cheek and I couldn't help but crack a weak smile.
" Love you too."
...
The sounds of slow music-filled Aura as Delilah sat at the table for the past five minutes after Michael called with a changed mind.
It wasn't long before Michael came through the door, wearing a black short sleeve and black slacks to match. The night was fairly cool for it to be summer. The massive heatwave the month before made him appreciate weather like this.
The young waitress smiled then she approached him with the clipboard. " Reservation for Delilah Smith?" when Michael nodded she led him past the many tables, eyeing him a few times in thought of how familiar he looked.
Delilah immediately flashed him a grateful smile as she stood to embrace him but instead Michael gave her a sly kiss on the cheek, just like he did the last time they saw each other.
Her smile faltered merely until his eyes connected to her — causing a forged smile to appear on her face as they took their seats.
After the waitress took their drinks down Delilah watched Michael's eyes stare at the menu although he wasn't reading it.
" So how's the album going?" she asked only to receive Michael's silence as if he didn't hear her, the last thing he wanted to talk about was the album ' Goin' Places'.
His eyes snapped towards her from the menu for a moment, seeing how her eyebrows furrowed. He sighed. " I'd rather not talk about it."
Delilah shifted in her seat. " Okay, let's talk about somethin' else then-"
" Can we please just order our food? Please it's been long restless days for me and I haven't had a real meal since your mother proclaimed her hatred towards me."
It was now Delilah's turn to have a moment of silence - staring at him like she couldn't recognize him. Before she could muster the words to say the waitress came with their drinks and offered to take their orders.
This dinner was spent in silence to Delilah's dismay. For more than a week she tried to get in contact with him, especially the day she and Curtis had a talk on Valentina's fire escape. Later that night they met Robert at Magic Studios discussing her future, her future that would depend on her leaving off to California.
She wanted to tell Michael right after the meeting for her mind was made up, she would be leaving before Dezzel Crane's offer expired. She couldn't stay in the Bronx any longer and she hoped that he would come with her.
" Michael I have something to tell you ... something I've been tryna tell you for over a week now. We've been going through a lot and it's been taking a toll on us. Yo, but I'm tired of living like this, this black and white world. "
Michael's stern expression softened as he began to fear her words. " What are you talking about?"
" My uncle came to me about this opportunity ."
Michael gave a soft smile as his posture straightened. " Well, that's good news girl why you sound like its the end of the world?"
" Because there's more to it." she shook her head, not wanting to continue this conversation suddenly as she riddled with nerves. " In order for me to be a part of this, I gotta move to California," she confessed yet Michael didn't get it.
He sighed and shook his head, swelling with remorse for her... he assumed that she'd miss yet another opportunity.
" My plane leaves tomorrow morning, and I - I wanted to ask if you'd come with me. You know so we can finally live out our promises to each other."
Michael's face scrunched in confusion as he now shook his head in complete disbelief. " Wait ... You mean to tell me that you actually going through with this? You're leaving?"
" Yes and that's exactly why I want you to come with me ... There's nothing left here for me anymore."
" Nothing left? How can you say that and I'm sitting right here in front of you? You're trying to force me to leave everything behind to go all the way across the country. My family, the Jacksons?"
Delilah's mouth fell slightly agape as she prepared to speak the words on the tip of her tongue.
" Don't you try to act like we didn't make a promise to each other Michael. I know damn well you remember what we said to each other the night after Soul Train, the night we first kissed. I promised to break free from my daddy if only you did the same with yours and the Jacksons, and honestly, I came through with my part of the promise but what about you? You're stressin' and driving yourself crazy over an album you don't like for a fucking group you don't wanna fucking be in."
Michael picked at his food. " So you are forcing me."
" Forcing? All I'm doing is asking you."
" Well I'm not ready for that shit, and I don't think I'll ever be... I can't leave my family Delilah, and I can't fucking live without you either. Are you really leaving me? What if I didn't come tonight? You would've just ended the call and left?"
" Michael you know what this means to me ... I'm constantly sacrificing shit for this and the time when I actually get something legit you wanna make me feel guilty and ashamed for pursuing it?" her jaw clenched as she closed her tear-filled eyes. Her voice becoming soft again. " Michael, I really don't wanna do this, just please kiss me like you used to, hug me one last time."
He remained silent, his eyes glaring somewhere over her shoulder instead of her.
"Michael ... oh so it's like that?" Delilah eyed him for just a little longer then to his surprise threw her money down on the table for the bill.
" Happy birthday." She mumbled, releasing a silent scoff, then throwing her jacket over her shoulders, turning to leave him in the dimness of Aura.
Delilah
I watched the lighter spark the joint as I inhaled and leaned back.
I've spent the past couple of minutes in Robert's car outside of Valentina's apartment — crying about Michael.
I felt Robert's eyes on me while I exhaled, my attention converting to him.
" Love hurts Delilah trust me I know."
" He's mad at me and what am I gonna do? I leave tomorrow what if I never see him again? What if he never wants to see me again?" I questioned seeing Robert shake his head in the blur of my tears.
" You know I ran across a quote a while ago when I was in a situation like yours, being a producer takes sacrifice as well. The first girl I ever loved I had to leave her behind."
" What did the quote say?"
" In true love, the smallest distance is too great and the greatest distance can be bridged. Unfortunately, I forgot the source." he chuckled, however, as the tears fell from my eyes his demeanor became serious again.
" Look ... Last time we talked it was about business so I didn't get a chance to really talk to you about how you've been." Robert peered at me. " Tomorrow you're taking a major step but I honestly wanna know how you're holding up. All this change can be overwhelming and I don't want that for you. Believe it or not, I see you as a little sister now."
I felt a small smile appear on my face. " I never had a big brother."
" Well now you do." he sighed. " I know you probably tired of hearing this but I am – sorry about Alyssa."
I knew the topic would come up. I took a deep drag, twitching a bit as I felt tingles throughout my entire body. It was satisfying to feel the herb lessen my nerves as I exhaled.
" Yeah I hear it way too often, its like a reminder that this shit is real... not just some long-lasting nightmare."
Robert nodded solemnly seeming as if something was on his mind." If you've ever wondered ... my feelings were really there for her — I just wish things changed for her... no woman deserves to be in an abusive relationship."
" What?" my eyes snapped towards him before I put the joint in the ashtray – no longer in the mood. " What are you talking about abused? ... Alyssa would neva stand for that emotionally or physically." I claimed with a raised tone feeling my heart drop at how he peered at me knowingly.
I could tell he knew something I didn't.
I watched him rub his beard in an uneasy manner. " You didn't know did you?"
" No." I spat. " And if this was true she would've told me or at least Valentina. She never let anyone disrespect her and she damn sure wouldn't let no one put their hands on her."
" It's true Delilah, I'm sorry but it is. The man she was with was very dangerous and into all sorts of things. You're becoming a woman so you should know ... he killed her then killed himself, the story been in the newspaper since his body was discovered and a ripped suicide letter."
I was so tired of crying, so tired of everything. My breath hitched as I shook my head in thought of her suffering in silence. " I was supposed to protect her you know – we were supposed to protect each otha."
" But how could you have known if she didn't tell you?"
" I was too busy focusin' on myself, I could've paid more attention to her. Something told me something was wrong but it was like I didn't care ... I was focused on my future instead."
" Stop being so hard on yourself okay... you're human not some superhero with mind-reading abilities. You didn't know Delilah and the reason behind it is that she didn't want you to — she couldn't have wanted you to. Sometimes the strongest people will rather suffer in silence than reveal their vulnerability. " he said as I turned away from him to look out the window, my tears were like a running faucet. I couldn't stop and I didn't want him to see me like this.
I felt his hand rub my shoulder. " Delilah to me you are one of the strongest young women I've ever met okay and you're brave too. At your age, I didn't have the guts to leave my home and follow my dreams."
" I can't help but think I'm making a mistake. Robert what if things don't work out again? "
" Do you trust me?"
I peered at him with a nodding head, feeling his secure hold on my hand. " Of course."
" Then hear my words ... I will go to hell and back to make sure the world sees you as I do. I knew you were a star since I saw you at the Talent Search... There are stars in space larger than the sun, they're just too far for people to notice. Prove to the world your stardom like you did to me Delilah, its your time."
...
Curtis, Valentina, and Robert were all in the car to accompany Delilah. Once the car stopped at their destination Valentina tapped Delilah's shoulder from the back seat.
" Yo you sure you don't want none of us to go with you?" she asked, sitting back with a sigh when Delilah shook her head.
" No I can go in by myself, I'm good," Delilah stated as she opened the passengers' door.
She stepped out into the night's breeze taking a deep breath as she peered up to her home of about three years. She could remember the feeling she had when she first stood there back in 1974.
The feeling was drastically different now.
" Aye Honey." Curtis snapped his fingers as he rolled the passengers' window down, leaning over from the driver's seat. " Remember you only got two suitcases to put all your stuff in — make sure you pick between the things you can live without and what you can't. And please talk to her — she's been asking about you every day."
Her jaw clenched at the reminder. She felt wrong but she was hoping that her mother would have a late shift that night so she wouldn't have to see her. She wasn't ready to talk – all she wanted to do was leave it behind.
Delilah knew she couldn't run from the discussion forever but right now she'd temporarily forget for her sanity's sake.
She expected it to be dark but not this dark. Pitch black. Her hands felt around until she turned on the lamp on the small table.
The mess of the living room greeted her along with her mother sound asleep on the couch.
A door closed faintly and soon she saw Junior sluggishly appear from the hall. " Delilah? Oh my God." he rushed to hug her. " I told her you'd come back."
His words creating a knot in her throat, especially once he rushed over to their mother to awake her.
" Junior don't–" she began but once her mother's eyes fluttered open Delilah's mouth shut.
" Look who's home." Junior smiled causing Delilah's eyes to glance up to the ceiling to prevent unwanted tears. They escaped her eyes anyway, this was going to be harder than she expected.
" Honey, you came back?" Ms. Lovett sat up.
Delilah's head shook, playing with her fingers in attempts to calm her nerves. " I'm leaving mama." she blurted to get it over with yet the sight of her mother's face softening made her speak with more hesitance. " Uncle Curtis wanted me to tell you myself. My plane for California is taking off tomorrow."
" Ca– California?" Ms. Lovett's voice cracked as she stood. Delilah glanced off to the side once she noticed the tears in her mother's eyes. Soon turning towards the hallway to do what she came there for.
Delilah kept her eyes focused on packing the entire time. She didn't want to look at her room or face the memories that came with it.
The process was quick and now all she had to do was walk out the door.
When she came from the hallway Ms. Lovett was now sitting at the dining room table. " Honey baby please, please don't go."
Delilah's eyes rolled. " Don't make this harder than it already is."
Ms. Lovett's hands slapped the table. " Please I can't lose you too, you're the only daughter I have left—"
" Stop! " Delilah snapped. " Just stop okay." she stepped back towards the door as Ms. Lovett continued to beg, but Delilah didn't listen. " Junior take care of her for me. I'm gotta go, I gotta." she wiped the tears from her eyes, peering at them one last time before she rushed out the door.
Michael
I stayed up all night after the dinner with Delilah – not wanting to sleep and allow time to move faster, only for me to wake up to her being gone.
She was speaking the truth and I knew that but I couldn't help but cower at the thought. It all came too fast and so unexpected, however, now I was left with regrets.
It was approaching the afternoon and I knew that her plane left in the morning ... it was too late.
I let her slip away from me.
There was a knock on my door but I didn't bother to see who it was.
" What?"
" Don't what me boy." I heard Joseph's voice say causing my eyes to snap towards him. " Come to the living room with your brothers and look at the news ... we're having a family business meeting."
As much as I didn't want to move I did anyway.
Bobby Coleman's face was plastered across the TV along with the words ' broke ', ' debt ', and
' bankrupt ' as the newswoman spoke. " Bobby Coleman has reportedly lost everything he's owned once shady acts from him were brought to the light.
Multiple artists on his label, including his ex the great Donna Summer, are suing and due to no payments his club located in the Bronx ' Limelight' is closing down. What does this mean for his label and the superstars on it? The world would just have to wait and see if LLR will remain a label without the now infamous Bobby Coleman."
" See, I knew it." Tito shook his head. " That's exactly why Swiss is the next move for us."
My eyes squinted. " Swiss? As in Swiss Records?"
Jackie nodded with folded arms. " We been working things out with them for a while, yesterday we finally signed the contract — the only people left to sign is you and Randy's missing ass."
I scoffed folding my arms as well. " I'm sorry but I could've sworn I was apart of this group too... I'm the lead actually. Don't you think I should've known about all these moves?"
Jackie rolled his eyes. " Yeah, whatever man are you gonna sign or what?"
" No ... hell no."
" Excuse me boy?" Joseph gritted causing my eyes to snap towards him.
" I'm not doing it."
" I don't believe you got a choice... your name is already on there." he threw the stack my way and there it was my signature in bold black ink.
I felt my temper rising as a smirk crept on his face, I was unaware that my anger came over me. Before I knew it I tackled Joseph into the glass wine shelf.
Every sound around me was white noise but I knew my brothers were screaming and I knew that Janet had come rushing down the stairs.
I could only punch him a few times before he pushed me back only to punch me the hardest he had ever in my life.
I could hear the crack and I could see my blood squirt on his white button-up all while my body flew to the floor.
The pain was felt throughout my entire face, I knew something was terribly wrong.
Janet screamed for me to run as my brothers successfully pinned him down. The whole room was spinning as I stood to run yet that didn't even stop me.
I could feel my nose as it leaked, leaving a trail behind me.
I nearly stumbled onto the floor as I burst through my room door, rushing towards my closet.
My body was moving so fast I couldn't feel my feet nor my hands throwing clothes in my bags, my blood dripping on them in the process. I couldn't take this anymore, I was done and I had to leave. I had to get out of here.
Delilah
Five hours I've spent at the airport due to delays. Navigation problems Robert claimed.
I fell asleep at least three times, trying not to worry too much about this issue. I tried not to think about a lot until Uncle Curtis announced that our private jet was here.
He made it a surprise for I didn't expect us to be traveling like this.
Several feelings took over me, it just felt so unreal as I grabbed both of my suitcases and walked out into the outdoors.
I couldn't help but reflect on everything leading up to this point whether good or bad.
Those morning walks to school.
The night we snuck off to the Limelight.
Seeing Michael perform for the first time
and the feelings that came along with.
My friendship with Raheem,
the night it ended.
I could never forget my first breakthrough
or being kicked out of my home that same night.
The fun moments at Barbra's,
the day of Alyssa's murder,
my experience on Soul Train,
my first tour,
my official first kiss,
and my last conversation with Michael.
I stopped in my tracks at the sight of the jet. I was really doing it, really leaving it all behind.
" You okay?" Valentina turned to me, holding her suitcases just like I did. I forced her a small smile and nodded.
My feet were much heavier now that I placed my foot on the jet's first step.
" Sparkle! " the scream was so loud that my heart dropped at the volume and the familiarity of the voice.
My head snapped around and my hands dropped my suitcases seeing Michael running in my direction with his own set of suitcases. I couldn't believe it.
My heart raced at full speed seeing the dry blood on the bottom half of his face and covering his shirt. I ran towards him with stinging tears, running into his arms no matter if my clothes would be stained too.
" Michael, what happened to you? What happened—"
" It doesn't matter baby." he cried into my shoulder. " I thought you were gone I ran the whole way here once I heard about the delays... I couldn't let you get away. I'm free, we're free."
Tears fell from my eyes as I placed both of my hands on his face, peering at his broken nose.
" It's okay, let's go... let's just get outta here." he nodded, grabbing my hips to pull me into a much needed passionate kiss.
We were doing this, we were headed on our final voyage to Hollywood.