*The next day*
I jumped out of my sleep, shaking and sweating. I looked to my right and Mekhi was looking at me like I was stupid while my alarm rang.
I silenced my alarm and took a deep breathe.
"You good fih?" He asked me
"Yeah. Bad dream" I said getting out of bed.
I walked to the bathroom and splashed some water on my face before looking at myself in the mirror before brushing my teeth and washing my face. I went back in my room and started getting dressed.
I threw on a white FILA shirt, some grey jeans, and my all white FILA's. After that I walked to the kitchen and grabbed a honey bun and a Gatorade from the pantry.
"Where you finna go?" Ma asked me
"Me and Mekhi finna go meet up with big homie real quick to meet his daughter or some shit" i shrugged
She nodded and then looked at me.
"You ight?" She asked me
"Yeah, why?" I responded quickly
"Nothing you seem, fidgety" she told me
I was about to say something but mekhi walked in the kitchen and asked me was I ready to go. We left to pick up the gang and then he drove the short distance to get to the park. By the time we pulled up I was done with my honey bun so I grabbed my Gatorade and got out.
Gangster stood in the parking lot by himself leaning on his car.
"Wasspoppin" I said piecing him up as we stood in the heat
"Wassgood young blood" he said
"So where she at?" I asked him and he sighed running his hands down his face
He walked to the passenger side of his car and opened the door. But when I saw who the fuck got out the car I Damn near shitted on myself.
"Oh shit" Mekhi said taking the words right out my mouth.
"Y'all this is my daughter Niya. Niya this is demon, menace, threat, Brazy, and Loso" gangster introduced us
I didn't even know what to say. We all stood there kind of shocked. She's my big homies daughter. And whole time she ain't even say shit. As many times as I done bring up my big homie or even his name around her she still ain't say shit.
"Hi. I'm Niya" she reached her hand out to me acting like she ain't know me
I snapped back into reality and just went with it.
"Demon" I said avoiding eye contact with her and shaking her hand
Everybody else did the same.
"I know this shit might be akward or whatever but she's around y'all age and she just started living with me this summer. Show her round the hood for the day and ima come pick her up before it her dark" gangster said handing me a little roll of money
I nodded my head and he dapped me up before walking over to Niya. He said something to her and she nodded before they hugged and he got in his car and swerved. Niya walked back over to us and before she could even say anything I spoke.
"You knew the whole time didn't you?" I asked her
"And that picture on yo dresser, that's you and him?" I asked her not even giving her time to explain
"I-i tried to tell you" she said looking down
"When? Last night? I've known you for almost three months Niya" I said looking at her and she wouldn't even look at me
"That shit Brazy" I chuckled shaking my head before walking away
I ain't mad. I just feel some type of she ain't tell me that the nigga im outchea risking my life for every second of every hour is her damn daddy. If she didn't know it would've been different but she ain't even look surprised when she got out the car.
"Devonte wait!" She yelled too fucking loud
"Aye lower yo fucking voice" I said
She out here yelling my government and shit.
"I-" she started to say
"Not right now Niya" I continued walking as a play approached me
"But-" she said only for me to cut her off again
"Not right now! Just go chill wit da gang and let me make my money real quick" I dismissed her turning my back towards her
I heard her small slow footsteps as she walked away and I made my play. For a whole hour I was walking around solo making plays or just thinking while Niya and them sat at a bench talking about who knows what. I looked over at her and she was already looking at. She shot me a small smile.
But I was knocked out of my trans when some nigga walking past bumped into me and stepped on my shoe.
"Bruh What the fuck" I said pushing him so his foot would move from off top of mine
I smacked my lips and bent down wiping off my shoe.
"Problem" he asked turning around
"Yes bitch you almost creased my fucking shoe" I said pulling my pants up
Out the corner of my eye I could see Mekhi and them walking over to where I was.
"Do something about it then pussy" he said stepping in my face
"Boy I'll clap yo goofy ass out here fuck you talm bout" I said reaching for my waist line
Mekhi stood in between us and grabbed my arm i was reaching with pulling me back a little bit.
"The fuck wrong witchu bruh?!" He asked me
But I ain't tryna hear none of that I'm tryna see what that fuck nigga talking bout.
"Bout to up it in broad fucking daylight nigga it's kids out here" he said pushing my chest
I just smacked my lips and moved his hands. I looked at him and everybody around me as they all stared at me. I ain't even say nothin I just turned around and started to walk away.
"Bitch ass nigga" I heard from behind me
I turned around and pulled my gun off my waist. Niya gasped but I handed it to mekhi with all my bread and dope all in one hand motion before walking up on ole dude and punching him dead in his shit.
He stumbled but didn't fall and swung back. I don't give a fucks who you are you gone fucking respect me. And ain't no nigga finna call me out my name like shit sweet. I said it once and I'll say it again, ima forever fight for my respect.
We was going blow for blow and I was letting all my built up anger out on this random ass nigga. His guard is sloppy and every time he swings it's with his right leaving the whole side of his face exposed. What the fuck is he even doing in the hood.
I got tired of playing with him so this time when he swung I side stepped it and hit him with the meanest two piece.
"Stop!" I heard Niya voice y'all as he folded up and hit the ground.
"Who a bitch?" I asked walking away as he laid there slumped
"Devonte!" Niya called after me making me even more mad
"Stop fucking saying my name so loud" I said from between my teeth
"What is wrong with you?" She asked standing in front of me looking at me crazy
"What the fuck you mean?" I asked
Ain't nobody finna disrespect me and think that shit okay.
"All that over some SHOES! That boy can barely even get up" she fussed
"Well he shouldn't have been talking that tough shit" I shrugged not giving a fuck
"I don't like you like this" she said backing away a little bit
"like what Niya" I asked stepping closer and closer to her
"So.......angry" she said lowly still backing up
"Well this is me. I'm mad and I been mad for a long ass time. Love it or leave it" i said loudly stepping in her face
She looked at me with a hurt expression. I chuckled and walked away from her. That's that Soft ass east coast shit. I walked away from her and the hood. I didn't even know where I was going I just walking with my head down.
I didn't even notice I was in the cemetery until I stopped in front of her grave. I sat down in front of her tombstone and just stared at it, just like I did her body 10 years ago.
My eyes watered and my vision got blurry but still, to this day the tears refused to fall. I sucked it up and sat there staring at her grave for what seemed like forever. I didn't have my phone, my keys, my money, my drugs, or my gun. It's just me and her.
Eventually it got dark and all you heard was the sound of crickets and and shit in the distance. I heard a twig snap and footsteps approaching me. I turned around and Niya walked up to me with some stuff in her hands.
"Hi" she said taking a seat beside me
"Hi" I said plainly still looking at my mother's grave
Well my real mother.
"I brought you some hood pizza" she said making me look at her
She smiled and handed me the box.
"Thank you" I said not knowing what else to say
"No problem. You kind of disappeared" she said looking away
"Yeah. I'm sorry about what I said Niya for real. I just had a lot on my mind so i took my anger out on everybody around me" I told her honestly
"It's okay. I'm not mad at you" she smiled at me
For a while we sat in silence while I ate my pizza. Shit a nigga hungry all I had today was a honey bun.
"Why?" I asked looking over at her
I had to know
"Why what?" She asked looking at me
"This. You being here and bringing me food after all that bullshit I kicked earlier?" I asked her
"Because. I know my bullshit and not telling you played a part in your bullshit and you wiggin out even if it was a small part. Plus when you were yelling I saw a lot more in your eyes than just anger" she told me laying my shoulder
"What else did you see?" I asked her
"Pain, it looked like you were about to cry, but refused to" she simply said
I ain't know what the say after that. Everybody goes through shit. Different strokes for different folks, you live and you learn.
"How'd you know where to find me?" I asked her
"I didn't. I just went to the few places I know around here" she shrugged making me chuckle
"You never told me who grave this was" she said and I sighed
I knew I was gone have to have this conversation with her eventually. I just didn't want it to be this soon. Opening up to people's makes me feel weak. Like I'm just giving somebody more and more information to use against me one day.
"It's my moms" I said lowly and she looked at me mad confused
"My real mom. When I was in second grade my dad had came home from work one day drunk off his ass and beat the shit outta my momma, like she was a nigga of the streets or something. He would always come home drunk and put his hands on her. But since I was so young it won't shit I could really do. But this time he took it too far. He got mad because I guess that night my mom was planning on taking me and leaving, but he came home to early. She tried to tell me to go back to bed but I ain't listen. I tried to fight back but he hit me too. So my momma ran up on him. While they was fighting I ran for the phone. I couldn't remember Mekhi's number so I called 911. After that he shot her in the head read in front of me. I was soaked in her blood. Then the police kicked the door down, took my daddy to jail and my mom to the morgue" I said reliving the events in my head
Even thought it was so long ago, no matter how hard I try to just accept it and move on it still haunts me everyday. Continually playing over and over again in my head in a loop.
"I am soo sorry to hear that" she said
I looked over at her and she was crying. I smiled a little bit and pulled her into me.
"It's cool" I said and she looked up at me
Once again my vision got blurry and and i fought the tears that threatened to fall. Niya put her hand on the side of my face again I thought about the day my mom died. How she touched my face.
"You are so strong. But it's okay to cry. There's nothing wrong with being hurt" she told me
And even though it sounded good. I refuse to cry. I didn't cry then, there's no point in crying now. I didn't say anything else I just smiled and kissed her. Not just no lil peck like usual but like a real kiss. She kissed me back.
After a minute or so I started to feel water. We pulled away and saw that it was raining. I laughed before standing to my feet with the rest of my food in my hand. I held my hand out and Niya took it standing to her feet. I pulled her closer to me and hugged her tightly.
"Thank you so much Niya" I said still holding her
"For what?" She asked me
"Being there. And not giving up on a nigga" I said honestly
She pulled back from the hug and looked at me.
"You don't got to thank me. I told you all you need is a friend" she smiled
The rain had her her wet so her once puffy Afro clung to her face. I moved her hair from out her face and held her face in both of my hands.
This girl makes me feel so warm and safe on the inside. My whole life I been fighting my demons on my own and she just makes it so much easier. I feel like I can open and up and tell her everything, and she not even my bitch.
I kissed her slowly and softly. And for the first time ever I felt something. Something different. It was like the whole world was spinning around me. This kiss gave a nigga butterflies.
I pulled away and we heard thunder making Niya Jump into my arms.
"Come on ma" I said and grabbed her hand
We ran through the cemetery and back onto the Main Street. It started raining harder and a nigga could barely see. I took Niya hand and led her inbetween the houses.
"Where are we going?" She yelled as we continued to run
"It's a shortcut" I said
I led her through the back way to the hood. We ran all the way to her house and she used the key to open the door. It felt different in here knowing this where my big homie lay his head. I think I was better off not knowing. I stood by the door because I'm soaking wet and that's disrespectful.
"You coming?" Niya asked me walking to her room
"I'm wet" I said making her laugh
"I know, don't you wanna change?" She asked me
I followed her to her room. I stood by the door as she went threw her dresser.
"Ion got no boxers but here" she said throwing me a black T-shirt
After that she walked in her closet and came back out in a different set of clothes with some grey sweatpants in her hands.
"Here you go" She handed me the pants
I held them up and they were men's Nike sweatpants.
"Who pants are these?" I asked scrunching my face up
She got me fucked up if she think I'm finna wear another nigga shit.
"Mine. I wear em to bed" She simply said
I nodded and took my wet shirt off and I could feel her staring at me. I smirked and unbuttoned my jeans dropping em to the floor. She gasped and turned around making me laugh. I pulled the sweatpants on first before pulling the T-shirt over my head.
"I'm done" I said and she slowly turned around
She walked to her bed and sat down turning the tv on. I walked over and sat beside her.
"Can I use your phone to call my brudda to come pick me up?" I asked her
She looked over at me and pouted.
"Your leaving me already?" She asked all sad and shit
"Fix your face ma. I gotta get ready for school and help get the girls ready. Knowing them Mira having an anxiety attack because she scared she not gone make no friends and Mina having a temper tantrum because she can't find the perfect first day fit. They probably tearing Mekhi ass apart" I chuckled a little bit thinking about them
They might not be my blood but for a long time they've been the only family I've ever known. Shit I was there when the twins was born. Blood or not my loyalty forever falls with them. She handed me her phone and I dialed Mekhi number to see she had his contact saved as menace⛽️❤️
"Yoooo you found him?" He asked answering on the third ring
"Wassgoodie bitch" I said smiling into The phone
"NIGGA WHERE THE FUCK YOU AT? NIGGAS BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU ALL DAY! YOU GOTTA HELP ME WITH THE GIRLS" he screamed Into the phone
"Come get me I'm at Niya brib" I told him laughing
"Gangster gone kill yo ass" he said and I hung up
I gave Niya back her phone as she laid in the bed watching love and basketball. I laid on top of her with my head on her chest and she played in my hair. I felt....at peace. Like I could finally let my guard down.
I looked around till my eyes landed on the picture on her dresser.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. It's just...once you started working it was like a little weight was lifted off your shoulders. It's like you always carry the weight of the world on yo shoulders. You were starting to smile more and I didn't want to take that away from you" she said making me look up at her
I pressed my lips against hers then pulled away.
"It's okay" I said laying back down
A couple minutes later we heard Mekhi beeping the horn. I got up and put my shoes on while Niya walked me to the door.
"I'll see you tomorrow morning babygirl" I said and kissed her forehead before leaving
When I got in the car I looked in the backseat to see the girls already looking at me.
"Y'all ready for school tomorrow?" I asked
They spoke at the same time but Mira said no while mina said yes. I laughed a little bit as Mekhi drove to the house. When we got there the first thing we had to do is help the girls pick at their outfits.
Mira was easy. She picked out a white long sleeve shirt with some overalls and her aqua 11's. Mina on the other hand had to try on every article of clothing in her closet before settling on the exact same thing as Mira just with the snake skin 11s.
After that ma told us it was time to come eat. Me and Mekhi stepped outside on the porch to smoke before we ate.
"Where you disappear to earlier?" He asked me as he sparked the wood
"The cemetery" I told him
"Damn. One of those days huh?" He asked me
"I keep dreaming bout that day. Like lately that shit just been replaying in my head over and over" I sighed running my hands down my face
I ain't no bitch but I just want the pain to go away. I'm tired of feeling like this on this inside.
"Damn" he said passing me the blunt
"I know man and Niya reminds me of her so fucking much bro. The hair, her eyes, her heart, everything about her reminds me of my momma" I confessed
"Maybe that's why you like her so much" he shrugged
"What you mean?" I asked looking at him and hitting the blunt
"I mean, you've never even looked at the girl the way you look at Niya. Maybe you feel the way you do about her because she remind you of ya moms" he said
That shit sound weird to me. But at the same time it makes sense. My mother was a kind soul and spreader nothing but positivity in this world for the brief time she was in it. She always said behind every bad action there's a good intention.
After we finished the wood we sat at the table and ate for the girls then momma told them to go take their baths for school. After me and menace ate I washed the dishes while he went on bout his business.
After doing the dishes I went to me and menace room and got some boxers and some shorts so I could take a shower. After washing for like a hour I set my alarm on my phone and laid down preparing to go to sleep.
"Back in this hell hole tomorrow" I whispered to myself before falling asleep
The next morning
I woke up to my phone vibrating under my pillow. I thought it was my alarms but nope....just my annoying ass bestfriend.
"Hello?" Answered her FaceTime
"BESTFRIEND I AM FREAKING OUT! I LITERALLY HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR, MY HAIR IS A MESS AND MY DADDY ISNT EVEN HERE YET!" She yelled into the phone
I looked to check the time and that shit deadass said 4:45am.
"Niya...sweetie...school doesn't start until SEVEN TWENTY FIVE why are you even up?" I said still half sleep
"Because I'm nervous" she whined and laid back in her bed
"So whatchu want me to do Niya?" I asked her
"NOTHING DAMN NEVERMIND!" She said and hung up in my face
I just chuckled and rolled over going back to sleep.
This time when I woke up it still wasn't my alarm but mina and Mira repeatedly hitting me with MY fucking pillows.
"Man gone head" I said snatching one of the pillows
"Get up" they said at the same time
I smacked my lips and looked at my phone to see I slept right through my alarm. Only by ten minutes thou I got up and looked through my closet trying to decide wtf ima wear.
I decided on simply a black and red polo wit some dark jeans and my bread 4s. After I was dressed I still had time to kill so I called Niya.
"Hello?" She answered with an attitude
"What you doing?" I asked with a chuckle
"Trying to find something to wear" she said plainly
"Stop acting like that ma. I was serious when I asked whatchu want me to do" I told her
"I want you to come help me pick out an outfit and do my hair" she said sarcastically
"Alright I'm on my way" I told her and hung up before she could respond.
I grabbed my phone,keys, headphones and my bookbag. Mekhi walked in the room with a towel around his waist like he just got out the shower.
"Nigga where the fuck you going?" He asked me walking to his dresser on his side of the room
"Niya house, you want me to wait for you?" I asked him
"Nah me and the gang gone walk down there when it's time to leave" he told me
I said okay and walked to my little sisters room. Mina was sitting on the bed fully dressed and ready while ma did Mira hair.
"Aye I'm finna go to Niya house real quick before school y'all good?" I asked them
"No, I don't wanna go" Mira whines as ma put the last bow in her hair
"Talk to ya sister before I whoop her" mama said making Mira groan
"You got one more time lil girl" ma said before she walked out the room
"Wassup Mira?" I asked her sitting on the bed beside mina
"I don't wanna go to school" she pouted
"Why not" I asked her
"Because the first day always sucks" she pouted and crossed her arm
"How bout this. Just go okay? And if you don't like it call me and I'll come pick you up" I told her making her smile
"You promise?" She asked holding out her pinky
"I promise" I said licking pinky's with me
"Now I love y'all and have a good day" I said giving them a hug and handing them both $5 for lunch
After that I walked out the house and drove to Niya house. I knocked on the door and as soon as She opened it she grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me inside. I was confused until I saw that she was only in a sports bra and some lil ass shorts. I licked my lips looking her up and down. So small yet so fine at the same damn time.
"DEVONTE" she snapped in my face knocking me out of my trans
"Huh?" I chuckled a little bit
"I said can you pick me out an outfit while I do my hair" she whined and pouted
"Yeah I gotchu" I said and walked to her room
I went in her closet and literally picked out the exact same thing I had on. Might as well twin wit my baby on the first day. I sat on her bed waiting for her and twenty minutes later she came out with her hair in its naturally curly state.
"You literally did nothing" I said touching her hair as she came and got the clothes from beside me
"I did a lot and yo goofy ass would want me to match with you" she rolled her eyes
I just shrugged as she walked into her closet. She came out fully dressed and as soon as she did there was a knock on her door.
"That's the gang. We gotta go ma" I told her standing up from the bed
"Do we have to? I mean I can just start tomorrow it's no big deal" she said sitting on the bed
"You're starting today and it is a big deal because gangster told me personally to make sure yo black ass was in school so leggo" I said grabbed her arm and pulling her up from the bed and dragging her out the door
Me and Niya got in the front while the gang piled up in the back. The whole way to school threat and Loso slept while Mekhi and Brazy rapped along to that new Stunna 4 Vegas-sticks.
When we pulled up everybody got out the car while Niya just sat there staring at the school.
"Ma you ight?" I asked her
She looked at me and shook her head no.
"I'm nervous" she said looking over at me with a worried expression on her face
"Don't be. I'll be with you every step of the way" I told her with a small smile
She returned the smile and we got out the car. As we were walking to the building she started to see mkre and more people so she wrapped my arm around her shoulder.
On our way to the office to get our schedules I swear it was like we was the center of attention. I even heard some people whispering about is.
"Who is that with demon?"
"Is that his girl friend?"
"She's cute"
"Girl fuck her look at demon. He glew up over the summer"
"Hell Yeah baby boy fine now" I heard making me shake my head
I walked in the office with Niya and surprisingly it won't that busy. We walked up to the desk and Ms.Mildred old ass was sitting back there as always.
"What Devonte?" She asked making me laugh
"Stop playing like Yeen miss me" I joked and she rolled her eyes at me making me laugh
"Nah but we need our schedules, she's new and for some reason mine never came in the mail" I said because it was true
Mekhi and them been got they schedule but every time I checked the mailbox mine won't in there.
"One second sweetie" she smiled at Niya
I swear Ms.Mildred be fronting like she don't love a nigga. Shit if she won't so damn old she could even get this dick. Her old thick wobbly booty was probably stupid fat back in the day. She printed off our schedules and told me to take my bad ass to class.
"Lemme see" I said taking her schedule as we walked out the office
We had damn near every class together except for 2nd period on B days. Other than that our schedules were exactly the same.
"See I told you yeen have shit to worry about. We got almost all our classes together besides one" I told her handing her back her schedule
"Really?" She asked relieved and I nodded
She let out a deep breathe and I laughed at her. I didn't know pretty girls get nervous. All the girls at this school that are even close to cute all act stuck up.
We met up with the gang in the cafeteria sitting at our usual table by the back window. We sit in this same table for lunch and shit every year. Muhfuckas know this our table.
We all traded schedules seeing what classes we had together. I got most of my classes with all them. They done fucked up, last year we barely had classes together and this year I got all my classes wit at least one of the homies. On gang we finna act a donkey.
After a while the first bell rang telling us we had ten minutes to get to class. My first period on A days in math and I got it with Niya, brazy, and Loso. Threat and menace both got Microsoft word & PowerPoint. I took that shit last year and that class was so fucking boring.
We went our separate ways to class. When we got to math we immediately took the seats in the back. Niya sat in the corner and I sat beside her while Brazy and Loso sat in front of us. The late bell rang and our teacher Mr.Gibbs got straight to it. Like no review or nothing he jumped straight into it.
After math it was time for principals of business and finance. I got this class with just Niya and menace. We got there before Mekhi's and again we sat in the back. This dumbass nigga walked in like two minutes late and did not give a single fuck. This class went by even slower than the first one. I'm glad niggas got first lunch.
For lunch me Niya, menace and threat walked off campus. Brazy and Loso got second lunch on A days some then niggas still in class right now.
"So hows your first day so far?" I asked Niya
"Good, been around y'all all day as always" she shrugged
"Eh. You love us tho" I said and she laughed
After getting or food and walking back on campus we sat at our usual table and just talked.
"Man hell nah, chassidy ass waaaay fatter than Gina's" menace argued
"Okay but Gina's jiggle more" threat argued back
"Because the bitch don't wear drawls!" Mekhi said and me and Niya lost it
Like niggas was dying laughing. But my laughter was cut short at the sound of a voice from behind me.
"Hey demon" I heard from behind me making me turn around
I looked and it was nae nae and her friend standing there. Shawty must not have noticed her money was missing when I left. I looked her up and down and she had on some leggings that and had her ass looking right and a tight ass red shirt.
"Wassupp ma" I licked my lips
"Nothing. Youn hit me up nomore or nothing like damn" she said making me laugh
"I been busy" I simply replied
"Well I missed you. You should hit me up sometime" she winked and walked away
"Bruh you hit allat ass?" Threat asked still watching nae nae as she walked away
"Mhm" i simply nodded
It was just a fuck nothing more nothing less. I couldn't care less about shawty I just wanted a nut.
I looked at Niya as she laughed and joked with menace and threat.
See from nae nae all I wanted was a nut but Niya ? I want this girl in my life foreva Eva