I always wonder about the existence of god. As a doctor, I would like to believe in a all powerful body in the cosmos looking over at the puny humans protectively. As a hindu, I have been raised to dump all my heavy burden on god and hope for the best.
Well, it's easy for parents to teach, but it's hard to follow— especially when you have gained weight.
I wake up in a hospital bed, Alisha looking over me as I try to sit up. She pushes me down by the shoulders, making a hushing sound to make me calm.
I'm calm. Very relaxed indeed.
Where the hell is Aniket and Aruvi? Did they just abandon me here to attend the interview for Aruvi's school admission?
"My back hurts." I groan, covering my eyes with the crook of my arm. I block the sunlight peeking through the creaks of my misshaped arm (the one that got stuck in the wheelchair), closing my eyes in frustration.
I want to go to sleep.
"Of course, nimrod. You are carrying two babies."
I sit up like it's Halloween and it's the last chance to get out of my grave. "What?!" I shriek, astounded by the news.
I can barely handle Aruvi— who can't even accept me as her mother. How am I supposed to raise two more children when I can't even be a proper mother for the one I already have?
"You're having twins, Krithi! Isn't that exciting?" She asks, a hopeful glint in her eyes.
Easy for her to say.
"Yeah. Very exciting." I sneer, sarcasm dripping from my tone. "Look, I appreciate you caring for me and all, but where is Aniket? I need to talk to him about this. I'm not ready to do this pregnancy thing, and it's driving me crazy to think about the fact that Aruvi—
She doesn't know about Aruvi.
I smile sheepishly at my glaring best friend. "Um, did you, perchance, know that I have a five year old daughter?"
She laughs. Wait a minute! Why is she laughing? Maybe she's gone crazy. Or she has switched bodies with that weird nurse who laughs at everything. I'm pretty sure it's not the latter.
"Yes, your husband told me about Aruvi." She says, putting a gentle hand on my shoulder as if she was delivering bad news. In her perspective, being in the same room with Aniket is probably appalling after that awkward moment they shared in college. "She's very cute. I met her a few hours ago."
A few hours..? That means the interview either got cancelled or they attended it without me.
"Where are they?" I ask her again, trying not to sound creepy or desperate but failing on a landslide.
"Aniket has gone with Aruvi to get your parents and in-laws to visit you." She pause, biting her lips nervously. "Also, I was the one to advice him to let you visit your family. Please don't kill me." She speaks quickly, compressing all the words together.
I chuckle, raising an eyebrow at her antics. "I'm not mad. I was meaning to tell Aniket that he should work things out with his uncle slash adoptive father." I reason, shrugging my shoulders.
"Wait, I'm confused. Adoptive parents?"
"I'll explain." I tell her, edging onto the cliff of the bed and narrating the whole story.
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Half an hour later, the man of my dreams becomes the man I hate the most— after a specific best friend twirling her hijab in the corner of the room,
pretending to converse with Aruvi.
My mother has a absolutely wonderful idea on reunions. Correction, a parallel to hell itself.
"Ma...!" I whine. "I'm sorry I didn't inform you about the past week and a half, alright? I was too busy trying to be alive." I argue, countering her point.
She starts bawling, shedding tears for no apparent reason. Geez, I'm the pregnant one here.
How is she my mother? She's dramatic, loud, too pessimistic, and way too obsessive about perfecting her every action.
Okay, never mind. We are carbon copies of one another.
"Still, you didn't even call. We went through mortuaries, for heaven sake! Do you know how hard it is to look at a faceless dead woman in the eyes, and be sure that it isn't your daughter?" she cries, wiping her tears primly with the handkerchief Aniket lends promptly.
Suck up.
"Not my fault. I left my phone before leaving for the gala. When you couldn't contact me, you should have called Alisha." I accuse, pointing a shaky finger at my mother.
"How long does it take to borrow a phone?" She says, while my father moves closer to her to comfort her. This is the first time I've seen the Iron Lady— my nickname for the woman— cry.
My in-laws stand in the back of the room, facing Aruvi and Alisha in the other end, awkwardly witnessing our conversation.
"Geez, let me think. When do you think I should have called you and told you that I got shot? When I was dying?" I sneer at her, folding my arms with sass.
I am not letting her win this argument. I may be hungry, sexually frustrated and deeply disturbed and mentally arguing and retaliating about my qualifications for my role as a mother, but I will not let my ma win this debate.
My mother rolls her eyes, which is also a first. My pristine, perfectionist mother never shows her irritation so outwardly. Heck, on some days, I had wondered if her facial muscles even functioned.
Her expressiveness is creeping me out. Did I die, and wake up in an alternate universe instead of heaven (or hell for that matter)?
My father sighs, glaring at the both of us. "It doesn't matter who is at fault here. All that matters is that you're safe now." He concludes, ending the argument outright.
"Fine." My mother and I yell together, turning our backs.
***************************************
The car ride back to my parent's house is the most awkward ride I've ever shared in my whole life. One, because I am currently sitting on Aniket's lap; and two, because my family is staring so blatantly.
Geez, do they have no shame?
Oh right. I'm the one showcasing my affection, not them. In this case, they're not creepy at all.
Aniket shifts uncomfortably as my mother in law sits beside him, smiling sweetly at the two of us. My mother sits beside her, Aruvi comfortably sitting on her lap and dangling her legs.
I face my family, instead of the window and I regret my poor decisions. I should have married a richer guy. Say, a corporate monster.
"Why the hell did you buy a car with five seats?" I whisper into Aniket's ear, awkwardly smiling at Mayma once I finish biting Aniket's ear punishingly.
He smiles politely, choosing to be silent. He is not being convicted— he has no right to remain silent, especially when I present him a compelling question regarding the poor life decisions he made on buying a automobile.
I huff, trying to position myself comfortably. Why couldn't we just go to the house separately?
Thanks mom, you put a great deal of trust into me.
My father starts the engine, while Prakash sets the music. He ironically chooses a jovial song in the currently, somber situation.
Aniket, one the other hand, has a grin expression on his face. His eyebrows are tightly scrunched in frustration as our mothers try to talk to Aruvi, who, being the angel we had trained her to be, responds to their questions politely.
I smile at their exchange, thankful that they had accepted Aruvi as their granddaughter.
"Mama tells me lots of stories, yes." Aruvi says, making my heart clench. When will she forget her terrible past and learn to accept me as her mother? How long will I have to wait to gain her stamp of approval?
"She told me a story about a jerk priest, a lion and the forest animals— oh, and the stone one was my favorite." She rants on about the stories I told her recently, and my eyes widen in realization.
She had been addressing me as her mother. As her mama.
Happy tears brim my eyes, but I push them down as I notice Aniket's frustration.
"What happened?" I ask him, concerned about his mental state. He did just meet the man who almost beat him to death for a few signatures.
"You." He replies, shutting his eyes again as he whispers into my ear.
Oh. Oh.
I smile sheepishly, stiffening when his hands travel up the small of my back. I grin at my family, trying to keep my composure.
My mind falls into the gutter once again, and I am unable to get out of the damn hole for the rest of the car ride.
"Stop the car." Aniket yells, and my father steps on the brakes, halting the car immediately. Aniket climbs out in the middle of an intersection. He leans into me, and smiles briefly. "I have this, um, thing, to um, attend to. I'll see you later." He kisses me on the temple, running to the other side of the road and waving to my father to move along without him.
My father sighs, shaking his head. "Workaholics, am I right?" He jokes, winking at me. I nod absentmindedly, upset that I couldn't tell Aniket about our babies.
What am I going to do?!
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