Connor
Every second since Y/N rushed over to me at the airport, it felt like the world just got a tiny bit brighter despite how dark it got during the night.
I started paying attention to the little things again and appreciating them more and more. Like they never left no matter how much she changed.
Also, I didn't think anyone would run that much for me. I guess that's what you get from someone who also stated they'd walk across legos for me.
She's intense.
That's why I was so surprised that my girlfriend stood outside of the concession building with a darkening expression.
Raising an eyebrow as I walked out of the restroom, I went over to where Y/N stood, seemingly frozen. "Y/N..?" I slowly asked. I didn't place my hand on her shoulder as to not scare her and make her drop the popcorn.
"Oh my-" Y/N jumped, tightening her grasp on her items. I took the popcorn out of her shaking hands. Why were they shaking?
"You-you're here," Her fingers pointed from the bathroom to where I stood, yet her eyes traveled from here to where my car was parked.
"Were you hurt? What the hell happened?" My free hand gripped her shoulder. A regular instinct, but I tried not to be harsh. Y/N looked like she was about to collapse, though. "Here, come on."
Concerned with possible reasons filling my mind, I took her hand and led us back to our trunk. We passed by another couple in the car parked right next to us who were having a little too much fun during their makeout.
I sat my girlfriend down. Goddammit, now I was starting to shake.
"You just went to the restroom?" She asked me, stumbling over a few words out of shock.
"Yea, drank too much Cherry Coke and shit," I nervously laughed through my reply. If her glistening eyes started to fill with tears I'd fall apart.
A nervous chuckle escaped her, but the strain and anxiousness in her tone were more audible. I inched my hand closer to the side of her face, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as if that would help in any way.
"What the hell happened?" I asked again.
Another nervous laugh, followed by a sigh. "I- After I walked out of the building, I didn't realize you went to the restroom, so I guess I saw the people in the car next to us-" Y/N lowered her voice a little towards the end, "thinking it was you and someone else."
Huh, that guy did have a similar haircut and jacket as mine...
"It sounds so dumb when I say it out loud," She shook her head. "I'm sorry, I really should've thought more."
"You think I'd actually do that to you?" I didn't mean for my voice to sound so accusing.
"No, Connor, I would never think so! That's why I froze up when I saw them right next to your car!"
Huffing, I plopped down next to her. "They just had to fucking park right there, didn't they?"
"Connor-"
"You're not doubtful of us, are you?"
Again, she froze at my sudden angry tone. I didn't feel angry, though, and I wouldn't be surprised if she thought that I was. "Why would I be?" Her defensive tone mellowed and became soft. "It's no one's fault, alright? I'm still recovering from the flight back here, so my mind's not in the right place."
Just like that, Y/N was herself again. Easily able to switch such a fucked up situation so sweetly and reassuring.
I would've blown out a puff of smoke if I had access to a cigarette. I had misplaced them earlier.
"Shit, I'm sorry," I apologized, guilt piercing through me.
"Why- why are you apologizing..?"
"Because I snapped at you for like, no fucking reason. None of it was your fault."
It wasn't just her. Every time I did that to anyone I would hate myself for it. Sometimes I didn't feel bad enough to apologize for it.
The streetlights along the park began to dim, signalizing the start of the few commercials before the actual movie. Y/N inched herself closer to me.
"I think we both had rights to be a little frustrated," she explained. "I don't blame you that much. I am sorry for assuming it was you though."
The screen turned black right before shifting into the beginning of the movie. My hand rested on hers reassuringly.
"It's okay, Y/N."
•••
Hours passed by while the two of us hung out in my trunk after the movie. I sat criss-crossed across from her while her knees were up to her chest.
The door was closed, and only the car light and moonbeams illuminated the interior.
"Hold on, I got something for you,"
Y/N said with a smirk. She held up one finger as she reached into the paper bag from the concession stand.
"Catch!"
A red velvet cookie covered in familiar plastic wrap landed in my fumbling hands.
I glanced back at her, a smile resting on my face. "You didn't."
"Oh, but I did." She chuckled. It was the little things again. That laugh. The way she secured her knees close to her with her hand gripping her wrist. An effortless grin that would light up someone's day if anyone caught a glimpse.
But there were other things that were noticeable. During our conversation about uni, her eyes shifted to the side.
Worry, guilt, something was written on her face. Her fingers itched at the hem of her shirt.
"Y/N,"
Eyebrows raised, she replied with a simple "Hm?"
"You know you don't have to blame yourself for things you can't control, right?"
Please, please tell me that you know,
Y/N.
Y/N gave me a sad look before letting out a scoff. "You got me." Her hands went up, surrendering, before pinching the bridge of her nose. She shut her eyes before saying softly, "Can I tell you something?"
I scooter closer until I was next to her. "Anything," I replied.
Y/N adjusted her legs until she sat like me. "When I was thirteen or fourteen-ish," she began, "I was at home waiting for my dad to come back from work. When he did, he came home with Pirate. Luckily, I was upstairs in my room so didn't actually see what was going on but I heard."
A hurting pause. My blood started to boil at the mention of that bitch's name.
"And after that front door slammed shut, it was quiet. My dad went upstairs to his own room, probably thinking I was already asleep and he didn't need to check on me.
"But I wasn't asleep. I fucking screamed, dude. Maybe I threw something, I don't-" She caught her breath before getting too riled up. "I don't know."
"You? Screaming?" I asked aloud. I knew she had the capability, but it hits you hard.
"I heard my dad crying in the other room." Her voice faltered at the end. "That's when I stopped."
Slowly, I took her hand before her nails dug farther into her palm. Y/N's head turned to me. "And I don't know about you, but it's not the best thing in the world to hear your parent cry."
I sighed. "Well, you got that right."
"Yea," Y/N continued. "I was pretty fucked up when I heard him. Not only that, I was probably one of the reasons why that happened. If not, the only reason. Mom was something else, but he had to actually take care of me. That shit hurts. I didn't do that to my dad again. I could never. That's why I feel guilty all the fucking time."
I knew the feeling too damn well. You being at least part of the reason for someone's else's pain or stress. Y/N's right. It hurt like shit.
There was another pause before I looked at her again. "Thanks for telling me," She doesn't need to feel so guilty. No one deserves that.
Y/N gave me a smile as I softly kissed her forehead. "Thank you for listening. It means the world, Connor," she said quietly. "You mean the world."
That story she told me... how long as she kept that to herself?
The little moments like these were my favorite. Y/N stared at me lovingly before wrapping her arms around my shoulders. I returned the gesture with no hesitation.
My eyes widened as I remembered something that I've been meaning to tell her about. "Hey, I actually have something for you too." I whispered to her before pulling away.
With a tilted head, Y/N sat propped up on my lap. "You are the king of surprises right now, you know that?" She raised an eyebrow.
It was impossible to hide a grin from her. It didn't matter though, I was genuinely excited about this. "Alright, so you know how I told you I ended up getting a job like a year ago?"
Y/N eagerly nodded as I continued. "So, I got a raise and it was pretty good timing because I ended up finding this one place. It's a little bit far from here, but it's really good. The apartment's on a nice floor and pretty sizable."
"That's awesome! Did you already move out?" She asked. "I can always help if you need to pack up more."
"Yea, I just need to get a few more things back from the house. I don't have that much," I shrugged. "Anyway, the thing is it's kinda lonely. Not that I mind- er well, I do like being alone sometimes and the neighbors are okay but like... I was thinking..."
"Wait, what are you saying?" Y/N leaned forward slightly, more and more intrigued. She probably already had a clue judging by her expression.
With a small chuckle, I reached into my pocket and pulled out an extra apartment key attached to a small chain. "I was thinking maybe you could move in with me." Holding it between the two of us, Y/N stared at both me and the key in shock.
"Hold up, really?!" She almost shrieked.
I laughed as I held the key closer to her. "I'm not really joking."
"You-you're serious about this?"
"Only if you want to though-"
And suddenly my lips were caught by hers. The world stopped spinning again as I cupped her face gently, dropping my other hand with the key next to me. I didn't realize how much I missed everything about this.
Y/N pulled back with a wide smile and gleaming eyes. "I'd love to, Connor."
I managed to contain my happiness as I took the key and placed it in her hand. So many things ran through me when she said those four words. It was another little thing that made me so fucking happy, in addition to the brightness in her eyes.
"Thank you." Y/N said softly, holding the key closer to her. We shared another soft kiss again before checking the time.
"Damn, it's late," I commented. "I'll show you the place tomorrow. I think you'll like it."
"Okay. I know I will," There was no way that look on her face was gonna be wiped off.
A silence filled the atmosphere, but it we didn't care. We were just there with each other, so that was more than enough.
I let out an airy sigh, content. "C'mon let's go home."