How could I have been this stupid? I didn't even care to check the others who had been standing around us, not caring if man or woman... I must have been too trained on the man with the scar that I did not take notice. I shivered, she will be dead by now. The wolves stood there too comfortably to have let anyone live. A whimper came through me. I felt the pain, even though we did not share a bond yet, I could feel such intense pain. I knew my mate was dead, I just knew.
Tears were flowing over as I heard whimpers that caught my attention "no, no" a tiny whisper reached my ears. "no, please, come on" I moved closer, looking through a gap between two wolves. Tae was sitting on the ground, she was cradling someone in her lap, a blanket hat been placed around him. Dark blond hair and fair skin... Tamail. "Baby" she whispered, her eyes overflowing with tears as she rocked back and forth.
It felt wrong to see her like this and an immense sting of jealousy made me unable to breathe for a while. "No, no, you're stronger than this" she whispered, lowering her head and kissed his temple through her fabric. Tears fell onto his skin, her body shaking with violent sobs. I didn't know why I was feeling like this, but a small part of my brain knew I should be searching for my mates' body. I couldn't move though, my eyes stayed on Tae as she kept whispering to the young man. She was stroking through his hair as she suddenly whipped her head up and stared at the black wolf in front of her. "WHAT?" she screeched, the hair on her head rising again like they had been before the fight. "Take him back safely" she ordered and lifted the body off of herself. A man shifted, not caring about his nakedness and crouched down to hold Tamail instead.
Taes' expression had totally changed, the tears were still running, but she was fuming. Her eyes swirled red and honey, she darted away in the direction of the pack. The wolves started howling and all but two followed her. Something told me to do so as well, so I did. I pushed myself to run as fast as I could, catching up to the other wolves, but Tae had darted through the trees too fast for anyone to follow. Before losing sight of her I had seen a metallic something flash in one of her hands.
We shot out of the forest just as the screaming started. People had scurried away, exposing Tae standing in front of Thomas. She had taken on a fighting stance, her back hunched and facing our way. Thomas had lifted his hand, a slightly mocking mimic on his face. "I don't see why you are blaming me... those pups decided to take on someone stronger than them, where is that my fault?" he said, his voice surprisingly calm for facing a fuming Tae.
"Traitor" she hissed, taking a step. Knives were swirling around both of her hands absently. Something seemed to change when Thomas' eyes widened, he started at Tae "you" he breathed "you're the..." his voice broke off "damn right" she said, her voice changed. The venom was back, hatred lacing every word. "And you took him from me" she added, the heartbreak making my own heart scatter all over again. My father suddenly stood next to me, shoving a pair of shorts into my chest "shift" he commanded and I did without thinking twice. The urgency in his voice made me listen carefully as I jumped into the shorts "you need to calm her, son" he said "quick". "What? ME? Why me? How?" I asked, confused. Dad didn't answer me, he had already turned around and was mind-linking the pack to evacuate immediately, lock all doors and stay inside.
People started moving away, glancing back at the scene, wondering what will happen. Dad stayed and tried to approach Tae "Taemilia" he whispered, his hands outstretched before him. Her head whipped around and I now understood why Thomas had changed his expression. Her eyes were blood red, glowing with a deep source of hatred. "Ruby" my dad said, "please let me..." "don't pull that shit again old man" Tae said, her voice the one of a different person. "you know better than anyone that I hate nothing more than TRAITORS" she screamed the last word and threw a knife which got stuck in Thomas' leg. He screamed and she laughed "that's right, scream in pain, I like it" she said, a crazy version of her coming to the surface. I felt fear creep up in me and I ordered those of my team who had stayed to leave now. My hoped fell as I saw the squat retreat as well. What could be happening that even those who had been training with her for three years were scared of?
Don't let her shift! You can do it dad yelled at me through mind-link. We're all dead if you don't he added. He was scared, I could feel as much and I started running "leave dad, the pack needs you alive" I called. He nodded at me and left to my utter surprise. I was about twenty meters away from her when she leaped at Thomas. He was screaming when she began digging her fingernails into the skin on his face "he's dead" she screamed, beginning to tear of pieces of his face. His screams of agony and pain filled the villages and overpowered my screams. Tae didn't notice me and even though I was scared, dad trusted in me and I couldn't let him down. I continued approaching, watching in horror as she tortured him. I was two metres away when she snapped his neck like a rotten stick. His body fell to the ground with a thud. I felt sick seeing him, nausea was building up, but I tried my best to supress it. I inhaled sharply when she whirled around to me, her crazy red eyes staring at me.
She was right in front of me in no time. I hadn't blinked, but she had still moved too fast for me to see. "Now look at you" she whispered, raising a bloody finger to my throat. I felt her sharp fingernail slightly slice open my skin as she moved just below my jaw "all brave wanna calm down the beast" she giggled, but it sounded like drowning. "So brave" she continued. I was frozen to my spot. I couldn't believe I thought I would die about half an hour ago just to be saved by her to now be killed by her. There was some irony to that.
I gulped and heard myself whisper "this is not you". Her eyes twinkled with amusement "and you know that because..." she said, enjoying the conversation.
I followed and impulse and wrapped my arms around her "because I know you" I whispered into her ear. "sure?" she asked and I felt her fingernails dig into my bare chest, blood began running down my skin. "I know you're not a monster, you're just sad" I continued, ignoring the pain as best as I could. "You've lost someone you've... loved" I choked out, my mouth wanting me to stop those words. "And that is hard, that hurts, but nothing can decrease that pain. No revenge, no working-out, no killing or beating people up. Not important how many people you hurt, your hurting will not stop" I told her, remembering losing my mum. "I get it, it's hard" "unbearable" she suddenly sobbed and her nails retrieved from within my skin. Her hands pulled back to be held in between us as I pulled her closer to me. She started sobbing, I felt her hot tears run down my chest and it felt like my heart started beating again. I lowered my chin onto her head and began slowly rocking her side to side "I'm here" I told her over and over again while she cried.
Every sob made my own heart bleed, but it was most likely only my own pain from losing my mate. I wrapped my arms tighter around her, trying to encircle her with my heat and comfort as she cried. My chin was resting on her hair and the smell of salt was filling my nose. Maybe Mark had been right and she was washing her hair with it... But I couldn't really care about that now as I continued to rock her slightly and whisper soothing words. My body acted on its own accord and I closed my eyes.
Her sobbing turned into tiny whimpers until she fell quiet and her stiff body stopped shaking. I felt her relax against me and was quick to catch her as her legs gave way. I scooped her up carefully, holding her in my arms. She moved closer to my chest and replaced her hand which had fallen down when relaxing. I wasn't sure if she was asleep or had fainted. Her face was wet from crying and tears were stuck on her eyelashes, but she looked peaceful otherwise.
Her breathing had calmed down and a soft warm breeze brushed past my skin where her mouth was. Dad came rushing to me I'm glad, you've done a brilliant job, now let's get her inside he said, scared to speak out loud. I nodded and began to carefully walk towards the entrance. Tae didn't stir when I started moving, her hand still on my chest. My skin was burning with hot electricity where she touched me and I was hoping it wouldn't wake her. Men started to exit the pack house as we approached, all part of one of the two squats. They sank to own knee, bowing as I walked past them. Their faces showed grief when they rose, but their sorrow increased when looking at Tae. They seemed to know who Tamail had been to her.
I concentrated on quiet and smooth steps, repressing the jealousy rising again. Get her into a bed, she needs to rest my dad sounded worried, his voice soft in my mind. His eyes looked at her and I could now see his fatherly love. Despite having a reason to, I was not jealous. He was her godfather and I began to understand what he saw in her. You can stay with her if you wish he added and ended the mind-link immediately afterwards. I climbed the stairs and stopped in the hallway, which room?
Would she prefer to sleep in her bed even though I had never really seen her rest in there? Would she prefer my room since it was comfy and warm? Would my scent freak her out when she woke? Should I just set her down in her own bed? Would it be awkward if I stayed?
I decided to lay her down in her own room, she would most likely not want me near her anyway. I opened the door with my general key, balancing her weight carefully and stepped in. To enter a room without a proper scent was weird to me.
I walked over to her bed and bend forward to set her down, but her hand suddenly twitched and pressed against my chest harder. I looked at her, worried I had woken her up. Her face was scrunched up a little as she moved. She seemed to... move closer to me. I watched in awe as she pulled herself up against the gravity that was pulling her to her bed. She was mumbling and seemed uncomfortable. I straightened to rethink what to do and she relaxed against my chest once more.
I didn't want to stay in her room with her, it felt weird to be here, so I decided to leave and enter my room with her in my arms. I watched her carefully and we entered, my scent hitting the both of us. Most werewolves did not particularly enjoy being wrapped in the scent of someone else who was not their mate. Tae on the other hand seemed to farther relax when I entered and closed the door behind us. Her hand and her breath were still burning my skin with their touch as I wanted to put her down. She struggled again, but gave in after a few seconds. Her face wasn't as relaxed as before and she seemed somehow lost on my bed. My head was spinning with all the thoughts of what I could do and what that would look like in the morning and...
I stopped my brain from overthinking and walked around the bed, laying down myself. My arms snaked around her rolled up body and I moved closer. It fit perfectly as her head rested underneath my chin and against my collarbone. Her clothes ruffled and I realized just now that I had put her down with all her gear on. I moved away and started undoing her weird pockets from her trousers. I opened her heavy boots, sliding them off her feet and prayed I wouldn't wake her with it. She seemed calm enough and I continued placing weapons onto the nightstand. The large belt looked uncomfortable and I didn't want her to lay on it all night if it came to that. I continued to ignore uprising thoughts and opened her belt to retrieve it. But the loops from her trousers were way too tight to just pull the belt out of them. I unbuttoned them and slid them off her legs, repeating her words in my head "What, you think I have never seen naked men?". I just hoped it went both ways for her to be so relaxed with that.
There she was, laying in my bed in a black slip and her shirt which looked comfortable enough to leave on. I wanted to lie down when the smell of blood hit my nose. The metallic scent made me look around and find splashes of blood all over her clothes, the dark colour had concealed them. I was leaning over her when I saw her whole shirt being covered in blood. It disgusted me a little so I started unbuttoning her shirt as well.
She stirred and moved onto her back, giving me better access though when I looked up from her unbuttoned shirt I saw her look at me. Her eyes didn't give away what she was feeling. I froze dead in my place, feeling a massive blush creep into my face "You were... your clothes... they were...blood" I said, my mind spinning at the loss of oxygen. Her shirt was undone all the way and had fallen to each side, showing me a tight singlet. It hugged her body closely and showed me all that lean perfection of her figure. When looking up again and seeing her catch me stare I blushed even more. What do I do? Shit, how do I get out of this?
My mind couldn't come up with anything as she kept looking at me. "It smells like you" she suddenly whispered, her voice hoarse. "My room" I mumbled, not able to form a whole sentence. She nodded slowly, looking at my bare chest. She frowned and lifted her hand. I looked at her hand at my chest, she was circling around the wounds. They had started healing, but were easy to spot with the traces of blood they left. She looked at her own hand then, which was full of blood, shock in her eyes.
"Let's wash that off" I said, finally getting back to my senses. I stood up and walked into the bathroom, she didn't move. I turned to see her staring at her hands.
"Did I...?" her voice trailed off, pure horror entered her eyes "oh god" she exclaimed, beginning to tremble. "It's alright" I rushed over, "it's alright" I told her and helped her stand. She was shaking badly now in a state of shock, horror and disgust. She looked incredibly vulnerable and I had begun to doubt she could be. I held both her upper arms and made her carefully walk into the bathroom. Her backwards steps were small and she didn't seem to notice she was moving at all. "Everything is going to be fine" I told her and reached behind her to start the water, hoping it would be warm right away since we were already kind of in the shower. "What did I do?!" she whispered, not noticing the water splash onto her back.
It wasn't a real question, it was more of a blame. "What was necessary" I told her and began peeling her now soaked shirt away from her skin. She let me do it, staring at my chest instead. "That will heal" I told her and held her hands in mine "I am alright" I whispered and began washing her hands while pushing her fully under the water. She didn't even flinch when standing under running water, her trembling continued and I thought it was too cold, but felt warm water run over my hands while I rubbed hers. "Shall I turn the water temperature up?" I asked her, wondering why she was shaking so badly, her movement increasing by the second "I did..." she kept whispering, her eyes wide. She didn't even seem to notice the water running over her face, she didn't blink.
The state of total shock lasted and I didn't know what to do, unsure of how to calm her, so I stepped forward and hugged her, pulling her flush into me. The warm water felt ice cold in comparison to the sizzling heat I felt when her skin touched mine. I felt brave all of a sudden, moving one hand into her neck I was surprised to find a small line of press-on buttons holding her fabric together. I carefully undid them, letting the fabric slide in between our chests. One arm had wrapped around her lower back, holding onto her hip on the other side while my other was pressed onto her back with my hand rubbing small circles at the base of her neck. Her hair was pressed down by the water and the both of us were soaking wet.
I was surprised to not see mist form, the burning of my skin did not stop, it increased and so did the need to be even closer to her, to feel her, touch her. She had stopped trembling and as she moved the fabric hit the floor with a splash. Her hands brushed my skin as she started to wrap her arms around my torso too like she had done before. But standing in the hallway that day was nothing compared to her bare skin on mine. I shivered with ecstatic pleasure.
I already thought my heart was going to fail, unable to take my emotions, but my lunges also stopped working for a second when I felt her face touch my chest. Her nose was brushing my skin and seemed to be inhaling, no idea how she not got water in her nose. She moved the tip of her nose along my collarbone, making me freeze in place. I didn't mean to just turn into a statue, but my brain had been washed down the drain it seemed and I knew that if I moved only an inch I would turn into jelly and follow.
A surprised moan left my lips when hers touched my skin, kissing me ever so softly. Rumulus body-checked me out of the way in the control centre of my mind and I was doomed to watch through my own eyes what happened next. The hand in her neck had grabbed a handful of her hair, violently pulling her head back and away from my skin. Her surprised eyes met mine just before I couldn't see anymore.
Darkness was surrounding me, the sound of the water still in my ears. I couldn't control my own body, Rumulus had taken over and I was too stunned to do anything but feel what I felt and listen to the water and my own racing heart. I was not breathing, not for a long time.