Being back in Fritz Mansion was like reliving my nightmare but after losing my father on the same night, I had wondered what worse could happen now.
Noberto had broken my heart and soul. And then God had snatched away my life from me. The very reason for my existence. My father was everything I had. I no longer had the knowledge of the day or time. I lost track of time and all other elements of life. Losing my father had been the last straw in my utter and complete downfall.
It was dark. And I welcomed it. I thought I was done with life and nothing would affect me anymore. But I was wrong.
That night when Noberto came to my bed, I didn't feel anything at first. I had lost my power to feel, including fear. I wasn't afraid when his hands moved under my clothes to reach out to my nakedness.
He slipped off my shirt and skirt. I let him.
He was breathing heavily when his mouth came on my breasts. He plundered my body with his mouth while his hands pulled off my undergarments. I lay still, holding my lifeless body while trying to keep my brain my blank. But if I had thought I would survive the torture without giving him satisfaction of my reaction I was wrong again.
Before long, the bubble built up in my heart and as his hands reached my core, a painful whisper escaped my lips. "No."
He heard me for his head came up. I couldn't look at his eyes in the darkness but I knew he was looking at my face. I could hear his heavy breathing and feel his manhood pressing against my thighs. I didn't know what he was waiting for. A small hope came alive. May be he would not violate me again. May be he would let me grieve my pain. May be he would let me weep for my father.
But his next words shattered any such hope.
"Let it go," he said before he plunged inside me.
He raped me all night all over again.
He had raped me as my father was dying at my home. He raped me as I wept for my dead father. And he raped all the coming nights.
It became a routine. He fucked me every night. And during the day. He fucked me in the dark and in the light. He fucked me in the studio, in his bedroom, in the kitchen and everywhere else he wanted. Life was one big-never-fucking.
One day he started painting again and asked me to pose for him. Then he fucked me. This became the pattern. All he would do was paint and fuck, starting with either. Sometimes, he would throw his brush and even fuck me in between the painting. His hands would still be covered in paint while he would run them wild all over my body, painting both our bodies into messy colours.
It was as if he was insatiable. It was as if he wanted me every second of every minute of every day and was all set to have it.
One night after the hateful session, when I thought he was done and asleep I went to the shower and stood under. I wanted to rub off his dirty touch off me. But it was useless, nothing would make me forget every detail of the way he fucked me. I wanted to make myself go numb when suddenly the door flew open and he walked in naked.
He had fucked me just ten minutes back and yet he was here. I crowed back into the corner, afraid that he was upset because I left the bed. He came to stand under the shower. Without saying another word he pulled my resisting body into his arms. With water dripping down both our bodies, he had fucked me under the shower.
It was like all other times but something was different. I don't know what but something changed. Water made our bodies slippery and his manhood slip inside me even as I clumsily stood under the shower. He held one of my leg behind the knee and lifted it high enough to make me go on my toes on the other leg. Once I was raised at the height he wanted, he slipped himself inside me. Even though I barely was hanging there, somehow, the penetration wasn't forceful or painful any more.
On the contrary, it felt velvety. His shaft moved inside me in slow teasing motions, causing a new sensation within me. This was something I had never experienced under him and even as I wanted nothing but to be free of his hold, I trembled involuntarily.
A moan escaped my mouth as his shaft rubbed against my sensitive spot. My head fell backwards and I squeezed my eyes tightly shut. I could not see him but there was a micro mini pause in his movement. This was the first time I had moaned under him and I knew he had heard me.
His hands almost lost the control of my thigh and I was about to stagger off, breaking our contact. My hands flew off of their own accord and I held him by his shoulders to prevent me from falling completely. The moment I felt his skin against my hands, my eyes flew open and I saw him looking intently in my eyes.
Time stopped for me in that moment.
I couldn't turn my eyes away. I couldn't close my eyes. I couldn't shut him away. He moved slowly inside me again while staring right in my eyes.
Another sigh escaped my mouth and this time I sucked in deep. I removed my hands from his shoulders and tried to move away. But his hand moved across my thighs and pulled my buttocks onto him. I bit my lower lip, trying to stop the ripple his thrust created inside me. The action had an immediate impact on him and I heard him groan, "Fucking Christ, Mela!"
There was no stopping then. He increased thumping me at an incredible speed, banging me hard into the shower walls but I welcomed every push and moaned loudly. No matter how much I tried to switch myself off, he had triggered something deep within me and I couldn't help but respond to the frantic urgency he generated in my body.
The more I tried to detach myself from what was happening to my body, the more I was sucked into the whirlpool of the physical exchange between our bodies. He overpowered my senses to such an extent, that I didn't know any longer what was happening to me, didn't have any control nor could stop myself from experiencing the ecstasy of an orgasm for the first time in my life.
The biggest irony was while I wasn't sure of what was happening to me, Noberto knew it exactly. He could pick up the signs my reluctant body was giving him and also knew what to do next to ensure I would never escape his trap.
As our bodies connected from inch to inch and thrust to thrust, he groaned loudly ducking his head into my neck. "Sweet fucking Mela, yes! Give yourself to me."
I didn't want to. But my body was moving rhythmically with his to find its crescendo.
"You are so fucking hot! Come for me Mela, come for me now!" His words were fucking my brains all over again but there was not a bone in my body that wanted to stop.
Even as I moved my hands away from our bodies, desperately trying to find some support, he wrapped his left hand around my waist and held me firmly. At the same time, he pushed his right hand between our slippery bodies and found my tight sensitive bud. As his shaft kept banging me back and forth, his fingers rubbed against my clit, pushing me into an unimaginable frenzy.
Finally when my release came, I burst out into a million pieces of raw, hot nebulas of nothingness. I collapsed against the shower set even as he continued with his thrusting, finally joining my limped body several seconds later. His hands slid off my buttocks, releasing me from his hold and both our exhausted bodies buckled against the shower wall.
I had just been fucked to have my first orgasm.
Could it still be called a rape?
I didn't know the answer. I didn't know anything any longer.
When his breathing returned to normal, he moved away from me. Standing slightly away, he kept staring at me. I knew he was surprised too, after all my still laboured breathing was an evidence of how excited he had got me. But I didn't have it in me to look up to his face. I feared seeing the reflections of all those thoughts in his eyes.
I somehow felt betrayed. Betrayed by my own treacherous filthy body.
He went on staring at me silently for some more time. Then finally, picking up a towel from the rack, he wrapped it around his body and stepped out of the shower. As he stepped out, my legs finally gave in and I slid down the shower wall on the floor.
I still hated him. But I hated myself more.
I had lost my self-respect when I had walked into his house again and let him fuck me all over again and again. He didn't even have to force himself on me, because I had long given up on life and myself.
But l was not supposed to make it so gratifying for him! I was not supposed to enjoy along with him! How could I enjoy him fucking me without my consent, without my choice, without any emotion between us? How deep had I fallen in the web of this deceitful life? When did I turn into this putty of flesh and lust?
How could I?
I didn't sleep a wink that night. Noberto never came back that night. In fact he wasn't even around the next day. But no matter how much I cursed myself I couldn't erase what was done. I had responded to the touch of my rapist. I had let him guide me on this lustful ride and I had followed him recklessly to his desires. I had done just exactly what he wanted and in doing so made my rape so much more pleasurable for him.
I had truly turn into his fuck toy. Because hate it as much as I want, that is exactly what I was. I was his fuck toy.
And he knew it. He knew he had been able to push my buttons in the shower. He knew he had made me experience the unspeakable. He knew he had made me come against my wishes.
There was no going back. He would not forget and he would not let me forget it either.
But the question was, did I want to forget it?
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Dear Lovely Readers,
First update of year 2019 is here!
Things are getting steamier and steamier.. I am just loving how the situation is getting more and more complicated.. Where do you think Noberto & Melanie are headed? Will Melanie be able to handle this? Do you think it was terribly wrong of her to give into Noberto? Did she have a choice?
And what is Noberto upto? Did anyone think he would turn into a forever starving sex maniac?
While these questions wander through your mind and you answer them above, I hope you enjoy reading the chapter. Be ready to expect many more twists and unexpected turns ahead.
Lots of love and action in 2019,
Anna