Flashback
Changsub POV
I know I shouldn't do this, but I'm letting go of my pride, I don't want to see my brother looking miserable. It goes beyond my belief, I value my pride so much, but here I am in front of Seoyeon, begging her not to go, begging her not to leave Hyunsik.
"Oppa, I'm really sorry, I have to go, Hyunsik and I....we're not working anymore, and this is my dream." she cried as she said this to me. I was glad we are on the secluded part of the cafe, I don't want people to see her like this, for her sake at least.
"You were together for years Seoyeon, how can you leave him like this." I couldn't help but emphasized.
"Oppa, believe me, I don't want him to be like this. I love him so much it hurts me, but I have to love myself too. I need to do this for me."
I run my hand through my hair and grabbed it in frustration. I understand her, but I don't want Hyunsik to be like this, like he doesn't want to live anymore. Music has been his life, both of us actually, but he love it more than I do. Now he barely even touch any of his instruments, he drinks from the time he wakes up until he fall asleep. He doesn't talk, he barley eats, our Mom is worried that he hasn't been home to Ilsan. I haven't told them about his situation with Seoyeon, they would be devastated if they would see him now.
"Seoyeon-ah, can you at least talk to him?"
She shakes her head, "Oppa, I wanted to stay for him, for us, but I know in my heart, I am no longer what he needs. He was my fairy tale that came true, I wanted us to last forever, I was blinded by that thought, we both are. But fairy tales are different than reality, we have our own priorities, we grew apart. I thought I was his princess and he was my knight in shinning armor, but we became the worst enemy of each other. I love him so much it pains me to know he's like this."
I put my hands on her and slightly squeezed it, I know I am asking too much from her, it was selfish of me to ask this of her. I only think of my brother, I only see Hyunsik's pain, I didn't thought she might be hurting too.
"Maybe one day, when we both found ourselves again, maybe then we can go back to how we were before."
*******
I went to Hyunsik's house after my conversation with Seoyeon. I can't do anything about the two of them, I just need Hyunsik to be strong and face his own demons.
I was at the door when my phone rings, I cursed when I realized who's calling.
"Chorongie.. please don't be mad." I pleaded as soon as I answer my phone. We were supposed to meet up today, she has her day off and we can finally watch the movie she likes. I want to punch Hyunsik's face right now, I might have to lose my own girlfriend if I don't see her soon.
"Yah! Lee Changsub!! I waited for you, I am all dressed up, and you didn't even call me." she screamed at me on the other line.
"I'm sorry Chorongie, I'm at Hyunsik's" she knows about what's going on with my brother and she's worried too.
I heard her sigh on the other line. "How is he?" I sighed because I was reminded of how miserable he is. "Still the same. I'm really worried for him Chorongie." If there is one person who could understand how worried I am, it would be Chorong, she was my bestfriend before we became a couple, well she still is, since I always confide in her about everything.
"Stay with him, don't worry about me. I'll just sleep then, drop by at the dorm if you can, I am just staying home."
I thank her and tell her how lucky I am to have her. Im Hyunsik!!! You brat, if Chorong breaks up with me I'm gonna kill you.
*******
Days passed, there were no changes in Hyunsik, the rest of the members took time to drop by and check on him, at first I told them not to, but Eunkwang hyung told me, "We may not be blood related but to us, Hyunsik is our brother too." I just smiled and thank them for loving him like their own.
He drinks day and night, he goes clubbing and even been to casino, he's a total wreck. He hasn't been to his studio ever since Seoyeon left. Sometimes I would go and pick him up, I would have to piggyback him as most of the time he would already passed out from drunkeness.
Until one day, I received a call, not from bar owners or bartenders, it was someone from the hospital. He drive despite having been drunk, luckily he didn't hit anyone, he only hit his car on a wall. I rush to the hospital as soon as I can, Eunkwang hyung came with me as he wouldn't let me drive in my state. I was so worried.
We found him with a bandage in his head, sitting quietly in his hospital bed. I was about to pound him for making me worry whe he spoke.
"Hyung, I thought when I hit the wall it will all end, the pain, the regret, the longing I have for her. I wronged her, I was the worst to her, but she still stayed. She stayed with me for a long time, even though I was never there for her." he sobbed.
Eunkwang hyung and I sit beside him, as he continue to pour his heart out.
"I stopped doing music because it what drives her crazy mad at me, I hated my music because I thought it took me from her. Then I realize, music has nothing to do with what broke us apart. It was me."
"I told my self, maybe you didn't love her, you just didn't want to be alone, or maybe she was just good for your ego, or maybe she made you feel better, but you didn't lover her. Because you don't destroy people you love."
He look up to us, we just hold his hand as he cried.
"I love her hyung, but I know, I am not what she needs right now, I don't even know myself right now. Maybe one day, when I find myself, I could be a better person, for her or maybe someone else."
He changed that day, he started to pick himself up, bring back his passion for music. Despite him coming back to us, he never came back to his old self, he has never been the same.
Until she came.
Present
I look at the two of them, I am happy for Hyunsik, I can see from the way they look at each other, what they have is real. I wanted to support them, because I love that the old Hyunsik is coming back. I have nothing against Amy, but she will leave soon, like Seoyeon, she would have to go and live her life. I am not sure if Hyunsik is strong enough for that.
I can see from the way they cling to each other, they don't want to let go of each other. I know my brother, even though they haven't known each other that long, I can tell how much he lover her. He never look at Seoyeon like that, like she's her world. I know that look, because that's how I look at Chorongie.
It's that thought that makes me wary, Hyunsik loves her more than he did love Seoyeon, what would be the effect of her leaving him, back then when Seoyeon left him, he almost killed himself.
*******
Author's Note
Another Changsub POV for those asking ☺️ this is to explain why he doesnt look that happy and accepting, believe me guys, he's happy he's just worried.
Shoutout to ChangRong Prayer Squad, here's a chapter making our ChangRong heart happy. Hello to Ellen, Jona, Lyn and Trish 😍
By the way, hyunsik's emotional speech is from Grey's Anatomy.