haaaaaaaaaappy birthday binnieeeeee 😘
play the song on top: Scared to be Lonely by Dua Lipa and Martin Garrix 💕
third person
genre: angst, a bit of fluff
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The relationship between (Y/N) and Changbin was one of those to not be considered 'normal'. They were friends, but they prefer not to label themselves because they were...a little bit more than that.
They were in the kind of relationship where there is no romantic relation or affection, yet hand holding is performed and dates are planned, cuddling was a usual occurrence and everyone around them got so used to it.
Some people would call it as 'friends with benefits', but they never really liked the term, so they just left it blank, saying that they were special friends to those who ask about their status.
But, as the years went on, their minds started to mature, and things started to take a darker turn. Their friendship continued nonetheless, the only thing that changed was that their innocence had been tainted. They soon started to have indecent thoughts about each other, which resulted into hand holding turning to touching and cuddling turning to tangled up bed sheets, their naked bodies underneath.
At first, it was good for the both of them. When one of them feels down or just seeks excitement, the other is willing to give it to him or her. But as time passes by like how with every wish comes a curse, every moan of pleasure brings forth a cry of pain in the long run.
But then, as time gradually drops by (Y/N) felt the effects, the consequences of her own actions starting to take place. She started to feel emotions she didn't know she was capable of feeling. She also started to take notice of Changbin's little antics that, surprisingly, she hasn't noticed before. Even more, with just simple clothes on she couldn't help but feel attracted to him.
Is she in love with Changbin?
Of course not, how could she when they're technically friends? She just loves him as a brother, not as a lover.
Or so she thought.
Bullshit! (Y/N) is either too blind to see her own emotions, or she just doesn't want to admit her feelings.
She then remembered her best friend's advice, "You should really tell him how you feel, (Y/N). You can't keep going like this." Jisung once said, but it wasn't something strange to the girl herself.
She had learnt to hold it all in, suppressing her feelings hoping that it'll somehow go away, but after hearing all the stories of the regret of girls who did the same thing she did she started to feel a little bit uneasy about the situation she had gotten herself in.
And that was, until Changbin had spoken up, tipping her over the edge.
At first it was just him saying that he met someone else along the way, with a small, almost innocent snide remark but it turned into a full-on yelling contest, a bomb of arguments thrown here and there.
"I told you we can't do this...whatever we are having! What is it to you who I like? Huh, (Y/N)? We're not even a thing!" yelled Changbin, the veins slowly popping around his neck out of anger.
"Yes, we aren't a thing, Changbin but we're still something!" the girl roared back.
"Then what do you call us, huh? Fuckers who use each other to get away from problems?!"
"We both didn't want to be labeled under anything!" her anger started to melt and turn into sorrow, a sad feeling enveloping her heart as if she didn't want to be in this situation in the first place. But she didn't have a choice. At first she was given the chance to run away but she stayed, wanting to know the result of her actions.
"FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS ISN'T ANYTHING!"
"Seo Changbin!"
"What are you trying to say?! That you're in love with me or something?! Huh?! Is that it?!"
"YES!"
That had shut him up. In a millisecond everything fell silent, so quiet you could hear a pin dropping. Changbin had a look, an unreadable expression plastered on his usually joyful face.
(Y/N) felt embarrassed that she had let her secret slip, but somehow a weight had been lifted off her shoulders, a burden she had been carrying ever since she found about herself taking a liking to her own best friend.
Everything had stopped. The world around them refused to revolve, yet the clock never ceased to proceed with its movement, the sounds of ticking ringing all around the room as the seconds inched away, one by one. They stared into each other, not breaking gazes, but the mutual feelings of resentment they felt for each other turned into a pit of awkwardness, as if the tension could be cut with a knife.
Her heart started to beat faster, hammering inside her chest as if it would burst out an minute now. But it was not out of nervousness, it was because of the pain she was feeling, knowing that he would never reciprocate her feelings having known that he's fallen in love with somebody else.
Perhaps the lucky girl is one of the trainees in JYP, or one of the members of TWICE. Or a member of a girl group from another company, or an actress, a model, or a solo artist. Maybe even a rapper, who has the same taste and music style as him.
Changbin was the first to break the silence, as his voice started murmuring out a string of broken apologies, although never formed, it was there.
"You...I...didn't..."
"I love you so damn much, Changbin. But I guess it doesn't matter now," (Y/N) turned away. "I'm sure you feel exactly the same way for Lu-an anyway."
As she started to walk away, she felt a set of fingers wrap around her wrist, gently pulling her back. The girl was abruptly turned around, and her sad face collided with a hard chest. She recognized it as Changbin's.
"Let me go," she says shakily, her voice muffled by the shirt.
"No, wait. (Y/N), you don't understand." Changbin stated hastily, "I...love you too."
(Y/N) turned around to face him and scoffed, "You can't take that back now."
"I'm not backtracking, believe me. Look, I was just seeing Lu-an lately because I've been trying to get you out of my mind. I've tried to get rid of my feelings for you because I know we're friends and I don't want us to get awkward or anything but I couldn't. They're getting stronger everytime I see you, or everytime we share those nights of us...together. The reason why I never said anything is because I don't want to continue on with this...whatever we have right now. I want us to be in a relationship where there is love, trust and hope. I want that kind of relationship, one that'll work in the long run."
(Y/N) felt tears spring to her eyes when she heard his soliloquy. Instead of pushing him away, she wrapped her arms around his torso and buried her face deeper into his chest. Changbin stifled a laugh, his own eyes getting watery as he engulfed her in his arms, his head dipping down to kiss the top of her head.
"Can we start over?" he asks softly.
"Yes, yes we can."
"I love you so much, (Y/N). Don't forget that." he kissed her head once more and hugged her tighter.
"I love you too, Changbin."
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- pealix_lee 💖