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Ethan's POV
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i looked at the t.v watching Rick and Morty, the front door opened up. I turned my head towards the door, Grayson walked in
"whats up" i said walking over to him. He ignored me as he walked up stairs, i heard the front door open up again. Olivia stood at the door, she looked sad as she walked in.
"Whats wrong with Grayson?" i watched her sad eyes scanned my face. "actually, whats wrong with y-"
Before i could finish my sentence she cupped my face, her beautiful pink lips were so close to my lips. Her eyes fluttered as her breath hitched "Ethan" she whispered, her beautiful face was centimeters away from mine. I scanned every detail about her, i'll never forget her.
her eyes met my lips, she just stared at my lips. Dammit, i need her. I gripped the back of her neck as i hovered over her lips, waiting for her to say something
"Olivia" Grayson shouted from up top the stairs, i removed my hands from her as i looked up the stairs. Grayson looked more pissed as he folded his arms, staring down Olivia. "We need to talk" he said sternly
Olivia moved away from me, as she looked up at Grayson. She gave no fight, she just went upstairs. I watched her as he feet dragged up the stairs, i could tell she didn't want to talk to Grayson.
She got up the stairs as Grayson grabbed her arm, they walked into Grayson's room. Grayson's door slammed as i heard Grayson yelling.
i sat back down at the couch, trying to figure why they're mad.
Graysons POV
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i don't know what to do. i fuccing like her, but i can't.
I can't like her back though. What if she does the same thing Katrena did to me? I-i don't want that happening again. The last time a girl did that to me, i became...who i am now
FUC.
but Olivia won't hurt me. I thought the same thing about Katrena, but she cheated on me with my best friend. Olivia would never cheat on me
Olivia likes me too, she wants us to date. But i can't, i don't want to date her. She'll just hurt me like Katrena.
I'm not even suppose to like Olivia, we were only suppose to have sex.
But i fuccing like her.
I need to apologize to Olivia for earlier. After she said that we went on a date, i was a complete as$hole to her. i wanted her to not like me anymore.
i walked out of my room, to the stairs. As i walked down the stairs i saw Olivia about to kiss Ethan.
so i don't want to date her, so, she automatically kisses my brother? what kind of B.S is that!
her hands cupped Ethan's face, as Ethan held onto her neck. "Olivia" i shouted from the stairs, stopping them from kissing. I can't believe she would just try to kiss my brother after i don't want her. Thats some low sht
"we need to talk" i said as i stared her down, she nodded her head as she walked up the stairs. She walked to me as i grabbed her arm. I pulled her into my room, i slammed the door behind us.
I'm so damn pissed. Now i know she would cheat on me like Katrena.
"WHAT THE FUC OLIVIA, WHY DID YOU KISS ETHAN!" i yelled throwing my hands up as she sat on my bed
"Because the last time i checked, I'M NOT DATING YOU" she yelled at the last part
"Still Olivia, HE'S MY BROTHER" i gritted my teeth, my chest puffed in and out
"I didn't even kiss him you as$hat" she rolled her eyes, walking towards the door
"but you were going to" i put my hand on the door so she couldn't leave
"maybe i was, maybe i wasn't. Why do you care, yeah he's your brother. But i'm not dating you and it shouldn't matter to you who i kiss. I watch you all the time when you flirt with girls, i never say anything. Because your right, what we have" she moved her hands back and forth between us "is just a deal, it'll always be a deal. So ether get your sht together and allow me to do whatever i want and let me out of this damn room, or fuccing kiss me right now and tell me you want me" her eyes sparkled as she pressed her lips together, waiting for me to react
i want her.
but she's already proven to me that she'll cheat on me, with possibly my own brother.
i removed my hands from the door, allowing her to open up the door. Her face dropped as she looked back at the door. I could tell she was disappointed, she opened up the door as she walked out slamming the door behind her
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i sat on my bed, trying to figure if i messed up or if i made the right choice
Olivia's POV
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no.
we're not doing this sht. I'm going to fuccing kiss him even if he doesn't fuccing want me.
I swung the door back open, seeing him look back up to me as he sat on his bed
"fuc gray, i don't need you. But i want you" i said walking up to him, he had a confused look on his face as i walked closer to him. I cupped his face as i smashed my lips back onto his
"You're an as$hole" i mumbled between our kiss. He grabbed my butt, picking me up. I wrapped my legs around his body as i kissed him harder, my tongue entered his mouth as i kissed with with every drop of passion i have in me.
He held tighter onto me as i ran my hands through his hair, he slammed my back into the wall behind us. He pulled from my lips as his lips hovered over mine. He bit my bottom lip, pulling it away from my top lip. He grinned as he growled, letting go of my lip, letting it snap back into place. He left a little space between us as he looked into my eyes
Grayson's POV
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she's my fuccing weakness.
i don't want her. but i need her.
I whispered between the little space between us "you fuccing need me" as i smashed my lips back onto hers. i brought her to my bed as i let her fall onto it. I crawled onto her as i kissed up her arms, all the way to her lips. I pecked her lips as i hovered over her
"i hate being affectionate, but with you" i whispered as i cupped her face, rubbing my thumb pads on her cheeks "but with you, i like being affectionate. Your my weakness, and i fuccing hate it" I pressed my lips lightly on hers as her eyes widened
"i'm your weakness?" her voice started shaking. i nodded my head as i laid besides her, kissing her cheek as she stared up at the ceiling
"since when, you just-" i shushed her as i grabbed her body, making her lay on top of me.
"how are you so damn beautiful?" i questioned as i held onto her hands, interlocking our fingers. Her eyes widened more as she licked her lips
Every feeling i've been trying to drown about her came up. I don't care if she ruins me or burns my heart. As long as i have her now, i don't care about what'll happen to me
i ran my hands up her arms, making her arms go over her head on the bed. I kissed up from her lips down to her chest as i hummed her favorite song onto her skin. She giggled lightly as i got on top of her
"i love your laugh" i said looking up to her as i went lower onto her chest, down to her breasts
"I love your lips" she threw her head back as i sucked on her breasts, making her feel good
"i love everything about you, and i hate it. I fuccing hate it" i whispered as i moved down to her stomach.
"why do you hate it?" she whispered
"because i'm not suppose to like you, or anyone. I'm breaking my own rules" i said as i laid soft kisses up and down her stomach
"fuc rules, Gray" she whispered as she bit onto her lips
I hate being called 'gray' because of Katrena, but with Olivia. I don't care if she says it anymore.
"you can call me Gray, with you. Everything you do and say sounds like music to my ears" i stopped kissing her stomach as i looked into her eyes. Her eyes looked brighter as her lips trembled
"Why are you saying this now?" she whispered
"because i never knew what it meant when someone actually cared about me and liked me. And i just realized, you care about me, and you won't hurt me. And it all just hit me, and- and- and i need you" her eyes met mine, we didn't say anything. It's like we talked through our eyes, it's like we told each other everything we've been thinking
i don't know if this is weird, but i don't want to have sex with her every second now. I just want to lay next to her and listen to her breathing and to her heart beat faster as i talk to her. I just want to run my hands through her hair. Is that normal?
dammit. she changed me.
"Olivia" i whispered to her as i still hovered over her
but everything doesn't change the fact that she tried to kiss my brother. i can't trust her anymore.
"and everything i just said is nothing, because. This is a sex deal, okay?" i need to protect myself against people who will break me. Ethan is my brother and will always be my brother, he's the closets person in my life to me. And she tried to kiss him. I can't forgive her for that, i may seem petty, but what if she gets between Ethan and i. I can't lose my brother too.
And i hate the fact like I like Olivia, because that'll make things harder. But i can still touch her, i can still be with her..if we still have the sex deal and nothing else.
"but everything you just sai-"
"i know what i said. But our deal is a deal. Remember the rules" i got off of her as i ran my hands through my hair
She shook her head as she sat up on the bed "i really thought you changed for a second, i guess i was wrong" she stood up and walked out of the room
i wanted to grab her and tell her no. but whats the point? i can't have her, she'll just ruin everything. i sat on my bed, thinking how i could make sht better between us.
Olivia's POV
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he likes me? or he doesn't?
he just wants the sex deal, even though he said he wanted me. Was everything he was saying were lies?
i closed my eyes trying to relive what just happened.
should i be mad?
Should i be sad?
i'm not feeling anything, my stomach feels weird just thinking about everything.
i walked down stairs, i saw Ethan sitting on the couch
"hey, are you okay?" he said to me, with the sweetest smile
"yeah, i'm fine. I'm just going to go for a while"
"do you want to talk about what just happened?" he asked me
i shook my head no as i walked out of the house.
i didn't have my car here. So now i need to walk home. Fuc.
i don't need Grayson, i don't need anyone. Grayson just wants sex from me. Then fine, he can have sex with me, i still like our deal. But dammit, i like him
i can stop liking him.
i can move onto someone else, i can distract myself, i'll be okay.
but why did he tell me he liked me, then change his mind?
did i do something wrong?
dammit.
i need to stop thinking, i just need to move on from Grayson. I was being dumb thinking he would ever actually like me, he only wants my body.
And i'm fine with that....
right...
i need to have better choice in men, first Fuccing Justin and now Grayson, who doesn't even like me. Why do i go after the guys that are bad for me?
i wish i could find the perfect guy for me, and he would always be there for me. i can only dream
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It's Saturday, and today we're having dinner with the Dolans. I've been avoiding Grayson and Ethan all week, but now i have to have dinner with their family.
My family haven't had Saturday dinners with the Dolans in a long time, i'm not sure why, but i'm glad.
i still don't understand how i feel about Grayson. My feelings are all over the place. and i also don't want to talk to Ethan, because i almost kissed him because i felt lonely, now everything will be awkward between us.
My brother stood behind me as i waited for my mom to get out of the car. I stood next to the Dolan's door, waiting for my mom to knock on it so we can come in.
"I saw your grades Olivia" Darrick smirked, i turned around to him, glaring at him
"how did you even see my grades?"
"mom was talking about them to dad, and i can't believe your failing with a 45 in 2 of your classes"
"Oh my lord, shut up. At least i don't have a stupid chipped tooth" i was referring to his chipped front tooth. He chipped it when he went dirt biking with his friends
"at least when i'm older i'll have money to pay for my chipped tooth when i have a job. You won't be going anywhere with those failing grades" he snickered
no one could get me more irritated faster than my brother
"oh yeah Einstein, who couldn't figure out if a door was push or pull and started yelling at the door?" i smirked putting my hand on my chin "oh yeah, you"
he rolled his eyes as he started talking "Since your barely ever home, i think i should be the one to tell you since you've probably haven't noticed. I broke your vanity and your computer" he giggled
"WHAT THE HELL, THATS EXPENSIVE" before i knew it i grabbed Darrick's head, putting him into a head lock
"MOM" Darrick yelled as i squeezed his head more with my arm, the front door to the house in front of us opened up. i turned my head to the door, Grayson stood there with his eye widened at me. I looked down, realizing i still had Darrick in a head lock. I quickly let go of him, Darrick fixed his hair as he glared at me.
It was complete silence between Grayson and I. my brother being the idiot decided to open his mouth.
"whats up with the awkwardness between you two" he said looking back and forth at Grayson and i.
"Whats up little man" Grayson said fist bumping Darrick, i stayed behind Darrick watching them
"Is your mom cooking Lasagna tonight?" Darrick said sniffing the air from inside the house. Grayson lightly giggled as he nodded his head
Grayson went into a sexy hot intimidating guy into a cute, cuddly cute guy in a few seconds.
"come in" Grayson opened the door to Darrick as he stepped in. i stayed outside on the porch not making eye contact
"come in Olivia" he gave a warm smile to me. i nodded my head, still looking down at the ground
as i walked in, Grayson grabbed my arm and whispered into my ear "we need to talk later" as he said it, it sent chills down my back. he let go of my arm as i walked into the kitchen
"Hey Olivia" Cameron said sitting on the counter
"hey" i smiled back. Cameron is usually away at college, but whenever she can she comes back home on the weekends. So whenever i come to the dinners, i see her often. She's like an older sister to me, i usually hang out with her when i'm at the dinners.
"where is your mom at?" she said taking a bite of celery
"in the car, she's coming now. How has college been?" i leaned on the kitchen counter
"Pretty good, i like all my classes. How has school been going?"
"good. How have you been?" i smiled
"pretty good, the twins tell me you hang out with them more. and for that, I'm sorry for you" she giggled. I giggled with her
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"being with them is actually pretty fun, although most of the time they get on my nerves" i pretended like nothing was wrong with them and me.
"they're upstairs if you want to hang out with them, i have to get the table ready" she got off the counter and started grabbing forks
"i'll see you later" i said walking out of the kitchen, upstairs. Grayson said he needed to talk, and i wanted to listen to what he was going to say.
i got to Grayson's door. I knocked on it, like i was some stranger. The door opened up, Grayson smiled to me, he gestured for me to come in. I walked into his room, i sat on his bed, waiting for some big apology speech. I was hoping for him to tell me he liked me
"what did you want to talk about?" i sighed, playing with my fingers
"i still want our deal Olivia, even though i have no feelings for you" is all he said.
"so everything you told me, about how you loved my lips and how you loved my laugh. was that all lies?"
He shook his head and nodded his head at the same time. "i just want our deal, just no more feelings"
i nodded my head. i knew this would happen, why am i surprised?
"fine, we'll still have our deal then "
but it hurts me
"Great" he said as he grabbed my hands, he pulled me up from the bed so i stood next to him. He grabbed my hips and pulled me into him, he smashed his lips onto mine as i kissed back, he moved his hands around my body. Like he was hugging me
i felt so warm and safe, as i cupped his face, kissing him more passionately. Without breaking the kiss he brought me to his bed, he sat down on it resting his back on the wall. I got on top of him, kissing him still, cradling him.
i looked at him as i cupped his cheeks, how is he so cute and hot at the same time?
he put his hands around my torso as i moved my hands down to his jawline. As we kissed i ran my finger along it, feeling how sharp it was. It got sharper every time our tongues twisted together
i'm only going to get hurt. But it's worth it
he moved his hands up and down my back, i giggled between our kiss. He giggled back as he moved his lips onto my neck, i threw my head back as he kissed my neck, leaving little love bites. Each one more darker than the last. He knew everything i liked, he knew every part of my body, he knew my body like the back of his hand.
He kept kissing until he found my sweet spot, i let out soft moans as he kept sucking on it. He pushed me off of him roughly, i fell besides him as he took off his pants quickly. He took off his belt with one hand, as he kept eye contact with me. He looked down at his member in his underwear as he licked his lips. He stood up from the bed, and watched me as i walked over to him. I got on the ground as my face was right next to his member.
He growled as i kept rubbing it through his underwear, i rubbed back and forth. Causing him to get harder by the second, i pulled off his underwear, leaving his member sticking out. i put my hand on it, jacking back and forth. He threw his head back as i went faster, i kept doing it until my arm got tired. I then put my lips on the tip, without warning he grabbed my hair, pushing my my mouth onto his member. It went all the way down my throat, i kept going back and forth with my mouth on his member.
My eyes started watering as i felt his member twitch, meaning he was ready. He made a messy ponytail with my hair as he kept pushing his member harder down my throat. A warm substance filled my mouth, he pulled his member out of me. "how do you like the taste babygirl" he whispered as he put on his underwear
it tasted fuccing nasty. "tastes like you" is all i said as i wiped off the sides of my mouth. I fixed my hair, as it was all messed up because Grayson kept running his hands through it.
"now, i would get a taste of you. But we have dinner downstairs" he said as he put on his pants and belt. I rolled my eyes as i ran my hands through my hair, i walked out of the room but before i could Grayson grabbed my arm again.
"you're all mine, just so you know" he whispered in a low raspy voice
i turned around to him "but we're not dating" i pulled my arm away from him as i walked out of the room. as i walked out I saw Ethan walk out of his room. His eyes met mine as i looked down at the ground.
fuc it.
"Ethan we need to talk" i looked back to him, he nodded his head as he walked into his room. I followed him as we walked in
He sat down on his bed, he ran his hands through his thick brown hair. i took a deep breath of air as i sighed, sitting besides him
"I'm sorry that i tried to kiss you. I was feeling lonely and sht" he faced forward, not looking at me as he started talking. he whispered something to himself, i couldn't understand what he said
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"what" i leaned into him, trying to hear what he said
he stood up from the bed "are you dating Grayson now? Do you still like him?"
"no, i've explained this many times. We're not dating, and now i don't like him"
"thats some b.s i see how you look at him" he kept not making eye contact
"i'll be honest, i used to like him. But both Grayson and i decided that i shouldn't and now i don't." i looked down to my shoes
"So you're over him?"
"yes, but we still have our deal. Again, no more feelings, i'm done with that. He's done feeling anything about me"
even after i said that, i still couldn't convince myself i didn't like him. i still like him, he's an as$hole, but i can't stop thinking about him.
"why do you care so much" i said standing up from the bed, he grabbed my wrists and held them next to my face. His grip hurt me a little
"Because i care about you" he took a long pause as his eyes got darker "because we're friends" he let his grip get loose as he looked down to his shoes.
he cleared his throat as he let go of me, he turned around not facing me. "because we're friends" he mumbled to himself
"are you okay?" i softly said placing my hands on his back, rubbing it in circles
"No, i'm not Olivia" he said still not facing me
"why aren't you okay?" i turned his body around to me
"we've been through this so many times before you've just never noticed. every time i break a little, and you never notice because your so concerned about who's going to be your next boyfriend"
"what do you mean?" he looked down to his shoes, i saw tears fall onto his shoes
"You never understand. I don't think you ever will, and now you can never know because you're with Grayson now. And if you break up with Grayson you'll just move onto the next guy"
"E-"
"No. Let me talk. You're always talking" he yelled, looking back to me with his tearful eyes. His mouth opened as he took a deep breath, his chest puffed as if he were about to tell me a speech or something. "i-" he broke down in more tears, i pulled him into a tight hug, feeling his arms wrap around me. he sniffled, he whispered something as he kissed my forehead.
"do you want to talk about it, i hate seeing you cry. Especially if i make you cry" I whispered into his chest
"not now" he pulled from our hug, his tears disappeared as he ran his hands through his hair. "we're having dinner with our families" he gave me a sad smile as he walked out of the room. I watched him walk out. What did i do to hurt him this bad?
Ethan's POV
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i walked downstairs into the kitchen, Cameron saw me. Her face tilted as she walked up to me
"are you okay bup?" she looked into my eyes
"remember how i told you about Olivia" i told Cameron about everything, i always tell her everything. she nodded her head with sadness in her eyes, i think she knows where i'm going with this "i almost told her how i felt, but i couldn't. Something in me won't allow me to" i gritted my teeth
"Is that why you were crying?" she poured water into multiple cups
"yeah, Olivia...She just..she just takes my breath away. She does something to me, before i met her. Cameron, i thought that everything around me was useless. Life had no color, no taste. But when i'm with Olivia, everything has vibrant colors, everything taste better, dammit the air smells better. And when i try to tell her that, the words won't come out. Only tears and anger"
"How do you feel when she touches you?" Cameron said turning her head to me
"like my world lit up, i always get butterflys in my stomach and i always just want to be around her"
Cameron held in her breath as she said the words i never thought i would hear.
"because you Love her. You love her Ethan. I've never seen you act this way, and i think it's because you Love her"
I love Olivia
I love her.
I LOVE OLIVIA, I LOVE HER, I LOVE HER, I LOVE HER
"thats what Love is?" my face rose. She nodded her head as she smiled widely
"my little brother is in Love" she hugged me
But she doesn't love me
Olivia doesn't love me.
I pulled from the hug as i realized why i could never tell Olivia why i liked her. It's because i never wanted to hear Olivia tell me 'i don't love you'
i never want to hear those words. And if i tell her that i love her, and she doesn't love me, i'll shatter into a million pieces, i don't know what i'll do. i can never accept those words
"but it's useless, she doesn't love me" i said quietly
"You never know Ethan. And if she doesn't love you back, it's her loss" her smile disappeared
"Dinner is ready" my mom yelled to everybody, Cameron grabbed the cups of water and walked to the table, i followed behind her
i sat down at the table, Grayson and Olivia sat next to each other across the table from me. I watched them as the played footsie underneath the table.
she saw me watching, she gave me a sad look at she stopped.
what do i do now? I love her.