Well once we found a gas station for the bike we started our long ride home. We haven't said a single word to each other since this morning though.
Talk about awkward but honestly he just pisses me off and im not going to put up with it.
He wants to talk then he will.
Yes i want to talk to him, i want to say something but i will not give in.
Nope.
Once he pulled into his driveway i got off and handed him his helmet.
I look up to his face for the first time in a while and i notice the worry in his eyes.
As soon as he notices me looking it disappears and his face is a blank mask of no emotion.
"Why do you do that?" I ask a bit frustrated.
"Do what?"
"Be all fun then shut down and show no emotion!?" I say while crossing my arms.
"Why do you-
"JACE STRIPE BURtAMOUs!?! Where were you i had to make my own supper last night you inconsiderate waste of space!" A man yells from the door.
He looks like a older version of jace but much dirtier and scarier.
It must be his dad. I now realise why he was so worried... His dad is probably like mine or at least how my dad was.
"GET OVER HERE NOW!" He yells.
Gosh i dont wanna let Jace go into that.
"Jace why not just stay with me or-
"No. I have to go." He says before looking me in the eyes for a minute "dont tell anyone."
Then he walks away being pushed into the house as he walks by his dad.
My eyes start to water as i turn to go to my house. I wanna laugh at his last name but i also want to cry for not being able to help.
Im not sure what hes going through but i know its serious and i know why he was so worried.
I can barely hear the shouts from in his house as i enter mine.
Once i close the door behind me my mom bombards me with questions.
"Who was that? Why did you skip school? In what world would that be okay? Why did you do that? It was irresponsible and stupid! And another thing-
"MOM stop. Look im sorry ok? I didnt know their was going to be a storm. I didnt know i would be stuck out their for the night."
"Go to your room, we will talk later." She says before going back to the kitchen.
Ughh its not my fault all this happened! Its jace and Darren's fault. It was Darren that told me to meet them for lunch but then no he had to ditch and leave me with Jace.
I had fun but then now my mom is freaking out and Jace probably isnt haven't a good time either.
Maybe his dad was just in a bad mood... He had a beer in his hand and he looked drunk so maybe thats it. Although jace looked really worried so maybe not.
Ughh life sucks sometimes.
"Beatrice?" I hear a small cute voice say.
I look up to my door to find my little sister standing there.
"Hey sweetie." I say holding out my arms. "Shouldn't you be at day care?"
"Mommy said i couldnt go."
"What? Why not?" I ask as i lift her onto my lap.
"She was thinking of daddy." She mumbles quietly.
I freeze. She may be 4 years old but she knows that he isnt coming back, she knows hes in heaven or as i sometimes think, he could be in Hell.
"Oh so she needed you to comfort her?" I ask.
I start to braid her hair.
"Yeah. I miss daddy.... I know hes not ganna visit us again but i want him to." She says as she starts to tear up.
She only knew him for 2 years. She probably doesn't remember him but he was her dad so i can imagine why shes sad.
Every little girl deserves a dad.
But not the one we had. He loved her yes, but he hated me. Therefore he wasn't the true kind hearted dad that she deserves.
2 years since he died and yet im still worried he will just enter the house again and-
Breath, breath.
Their was a time when he was nice. A time when he loved me but i hardly remember that. All the bad he caused me over comes the good.
My mom never did anything about it. I know she knew. She never saw but she knew.
She loved him too much to make a move, too scared he would leave. They were high school sweet hearts after all.
Eventually me and Libby fell asleep in my bed.
------
"Suppers ready." I hear my mom say.
"Jefkfjdj whaaa?" I mumble as i try to open my eyes.
I feel something poking my cheek.
I giggle before grabbing libby and tickling her sides.
"Really you wanna poke me?" I say with a big smile.
"Hehee no! I wont do it again! Promise!" She squeals.
"Hmmm did you hear something?" I joke? "Maybe it was a mouse?"
"Haha no!! It was meee!" She laughs.
I lift her up and hold her on my hip exaggerating my grunting.
"You are getting so heavy!" I breath in deeply.
"Hehe!!" She giggles knowing im joking.
She is getting a bit heavy but not crazily. I can handle it.
"Mmmm chicken wings!?" Wooott!!
I love chicken wings! Literally the best food in the world!
As i sit down i look out my dining room window to notice Jace laying on his front lawn while smoking.
"Ughh disgusting. Smoking is going to kill that boy." My mom says as she shakes her head.
"Yeah..." I think i should invite him in.. Who knows if he will eat if i dont.
I think even if he rejects the idea it will be worth it to ask.
Who am i kidding? im not excepting no for an answer.
"Ill be right back." I say as i grab a chicken wing and head out the front door.
I needed something to bribe him with so i thought the wing was a good idea although now i kinda just want to eat it.
Common Beatie. Self control is key.
I walk right up to jace then lay on my back right beside him.
I look up at the darkening sky with awe.
Its beautiful. Its not completely dark but its getting their.
Its around 7:30 right now which is late for supper but i guess my mom didn't care with everything that happened.
I sigh loudly letting him know im here.
"I saw you coming Beatie." He chuckles.
"Oh." I blush before continuing. "So my mom made supper."
"Really? Cool." He says with a smirk.
I roll my eyes. "Its chicken wings and homemade fries.." I say with a knowing smile.
Who can turn that down?!
"Okay, your point?"
"Umm come eat with us? I know you want to!" I quickly shove the chicken wing right in front of his face.
It brushes his lips so it looks like hes kissing it.
"Hahha looks like your makin out with chicken!" I laugh.
He pushes my hand away before putting his cigarette out.
"That does taste pretty good." He sits up and looks over at me.
"Oh yeah?" I say sitting up as well.
"Yeah." He smiles.
"Okay... so!?"
"Okay." He agrees.
"Lets go stuff our faces in deliciousness then!" I hop up and grab his hand before dragging him to my house.
"Look about my dad-
He starts but i cut him off.
"Its ok." I smile.
He smiles back and follows behind me into my kitchen.
"Mother dearest this is the ever so annoying Jace. Jace the magnificent This is my mumma and my little sister Libby. Shes the big O 4!" I say in an announcer voice.
He rolls his eyes at me while my mom just shakes her head.
"And you wonder why you have no friends..." She mumbles.
She probably didn't expect me to hear. I know she was kidding but it still hurt.
I lose my smile and clear my throat.
See my mom can be in the best mood ever and the nicest person ever but once she thinks about my dad she just kinda loses that for a bit.
I can deal with that because i love her and i know she loves me.
"Libby all of a sudden jumps out of her chair and picks up Jaces hand before licking it.
My eyes widen.
"LIBBY! No, you cant lick him!?" I say while laughing.
Jace at first looked scared but then started to smile.
"Well hello there! May i see your hand?" He says in a formal voice.
What is he doing? I swear if he licks her hand too im going to spazz.
All i want to do is eat so why cant these people be normal. Oh wait im not normal either so guess i just attract those people? Libby has it in her genes so thats understandable.
She smiles at Jace and hands him her small hand.
He grabs it before laying a gentle kiss on it. Like they did back in the day or in the movies.
"Im a princess! Im a princess!" She shouts happily.
Then proceeds to curtsy with an imaginary dress.
I whisper a thank you to Jace since hes sitting beside me.
He looks at me before digging into the fries. How prince charming of him.
Note the sarcasm. Literally he is digging in like he hasn't eaten in ages.
"Gosh ya a bit hungry there?" I ask with a smirk.
"Im a guy!" Is all he says through a mouth full of food.
Yeah as if that explains everything.
I barge into my food too and devour every bone there is from the wings. No piece of meat shall survive my rath!!
"Beatrice! You are a young lady! Pace yourself." My mom scolds.
"Mom." I say with a mouth full.
She glares at me so i swallow before answering her.
I gulp and continue "chicken wings aren't very lady like mom. I dont think i can eat them politely."
"Use a fork like Libby and me!" She says seriously.
Man it must of been a horrible day for her today. Remembering dad is hard on her but she doesn't usually take it out on me this much.
"Mom." I say questionably.
She looks at me before pushing her chair back and walking away.
"Clean up after Libbys done." I hear her shout on her way up the stairs.
"What?! But-
"Do it!" She yells.
I could hear her voice crack at the last word which means shes most likely about to cry.
I want to help her get through this but we were never that close.
Libby looks at me before getting up and hugging me then saying good night.
"Night sweetie, sleep tight." I say softly.
Me and libby on the other hand are as close as sisters can get with the age difference that we have.
Shes my everything.
"Ill help." I hear Jace say snapping me out of my thoughts.
I smirk and wipe my finger into the ketchup on my plate.
"Oh how nice of you!" I say then all of a sudden my hand whips out and taps his nose with the bright red think liquid.
"Oh how mature of you!" He glares.
"Since when is being mature fun?" I ask.
"True. But if you want my reputation at school then be mature and bad ass."
"News flash but i dont want your rep. Everyones scared of you." I say honestly.
"Yes. But they also wont mess with me. And i know who my real friends are." He answers me while collecting all the plates.
"WOW look at the bad boy getting deep. You know i dont think ive actually seen you be...well 'bad ass'"
"You will." He says mysteriously.
"Oh really?" I make sure to use a posh british accent.
He all of a sudden squirts me in the face with ketchup.
"Ohmigosh." I breath.
"Oh no you didnt!!" I sassily say.
"Oh yes i did!" He does the whole head swirl too.
I burst out laughing and then Jump closer to him smashing my head into his chest. Making sure to get ketchup all over his shirt.
He pushes me gently away before saying "what is with us and getting in food fights?"
"It just comes naturally." I say with a wink.
"Really? You know what else comes naturally?" He asks.
"Hmmm?"
"This." Before i know it he straddling me on the ground tickling me.
Ughh he is so dead!!
"JACe!! hahahaha st-stop!" I yell.
"Nope." He pops the 'P'
"Dont be a rude duuuuudee! Dont you know im human toooooouuuu!!" I sing.
"Are you trying to quote that song?" He asks.
He stops tickling me for a second so i take this opportunity to jump up and run.
I start laughing again before running out the front door, finding that its the only place to go.
"You aren't fast enough! Im a comin!" He says.
"Sure sure.." I mumble as i get onto my front lawn and right as i go to look behind me im being tackled yet again.
"OK Jace what is with you and straddling me?" I laugh.
"Just so addicting." He says before licking his lips.
I stop laughing because im surprised at what he says.
Did he just say its addicting to straddle me?
Ohmigosh. I start to blush as i notice him stiffen.
He suddenly gets up and says a quick bye before fast walking back to his house.
"What!? Jace! Wait!" I yell after him.
I decide to jog up to him then before i even realize what I'm doing i jump into his arms and into a hug.
And i break down.
Unexpected and i just cant control myself.
I saw his dad, i know what he's going through but im trying to deny it.
He needs a friend and somehow i know darren and finnick or whatever dont know.
I feel like im losing my mind.
A week ago i thought he could kill me and now im hugging him while crying.
Am i just waiting to die or something?
He all of a sudden wraps his arms around me and hugs me back.
It took him a few minutes but when he did i just... I expected him to push me away.
I wipe my tears away and pull back a bit.
"Sorry." I sniffle.
"What was that about?" He asks gently.
"I know what your going through." Is all i say.
His eyes harden before he says "no i don't think you do. You have a mom and sister that love you. I don't know where your dad is but im sure hes just as loving as your mom. You have a good life Beatrice. Dont take that for granted." He states.
This angers me because hes so wrong.
"Excuse me?" I say while crossing my arms. "You dont even know me!"
"You are a happy person, a happy innocent person and if you get close to me you will only get hurt. I dont want that. So please for your own good, leave me alone." He coldly says.
Is he serious right now? Im not sure what to say but i know hes wrong and i dont care if i get hurt being his friend. This is the happiest ive been in a long time.
Its worth it.
"Thats not your decision. Besides, im not happy. I have walls. I have fake smiles. But when im with you there real. I hate my life. Ive tried to commit suicide. There my secret is out. But you know what? If you know me so well then i guess you already knew that right?" Then i walk away with out another word.
Last thing i saw was his hurt and confused face.
I dont care, he can make conclusions about me all he wants but saying i have it easy. No. Saying i will get hurt knowing him? No.
When i made that decision to kill myself, it was selfish, Libby needs me and i know that now. I have a life worth living and so does Jace.
He makes my life better. Even when we fight.
He is worth the fight.
It hurts now but you have to fall before you fly.
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Thanks for reading! This was kinda a serious chapter but i felt like it was necessary for the plot.
I love you all!
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