I walked back into the backyard by myself. Corey had gone a couple of minutes previous, but I needed a minute by myself to just breath.
I started walking towards Ellen, Suzanna, and Kourtney but was intercepted by my brother before I could even get close.
"How did it go? What happened?"
I shook my head, not wanting to tell him that Corey and I still haven't precisely rekindled our relationship just yet. I knew that telling him would damper his spirits, and I didn't want my brother to be upset at his own party.
"It's a lot, and you're party's almost over. I'll tell you tonight."
He nods, "Okay. I'm about to shoot the confetti canon if you want to go grab a front row spot."
"I'll make sure I'm front and center," I say, standing up on my tip-toes and kissing my brother's cheek. I'm so excited for you."
Cody smiles at me before cupping his hands and shouting out that it was time.
The sun was starting to set, leaving the lighting gorgeous for the occasion.
I stood by Mariana and Suzanna while the other girl's wanted to watch with their significant other's.
Like a mirror image, Corey, Kike, and Alex stood opposite the circle from us.
Cody ran into the center of the group, holding an odd almost pipe-looking object.
"Are you guys ready?" He asks, looking around to make sure that everybody was there.
Everyone shouts their yeses, and yeahs, and a few people took out their phones, wanting to capture the moment that was about to unfold.
Keep in mind, Cody is the only one who knows the color of the confetti inside. The element of surprise wasn't necessarily meant for him in this situation; it was intended for everyone else.
He holds his small confetti canon, raising it high in the air before tugging on the string.
It felt like it was in slow motion. A cloud of grey smoke came up first, followed behind with a trail of pink confetti that was floating around everywhere.
The confetti fell, leaving Cody covered.
Shouts and cheers came from everyone, and it was a fun thing to watch all the boys jump on top of my brother, chanting their congratulations. I smiled to myself, knowing that the boys were all going to become a big bunch of softies with Cody bringing his baby girl around all the time.
I knew for sure that that's what's going to happen to my brother.
"Oh my gosh, I'm going to have a niece!" I yelled, running up and hugging my brother who was wearing a ginormous smile on his face.
"I know; I'm going to have a daughter!"
I look at him, taking in how fast life can hit you. It was only eight months ago that Cody moved in with me, meaning it's been seven months since Corey and I started dating.
When my brother first moved in, I could not have guessed that by this time, we'd both have children on the way. That just seemed unreal to me.
I hugged Cody, taking a final look at the party he had worked so hard to throw.
"I'm tired Cods; I think I'm going to call it a night and just chill out inside."
"Okay, the party should be wrapping up soon anyway."
I nod, walking away from him so I could say goodbye to the girls.
I wasn't planning on coming back out so they would all be gone soon.
I hugged them all goodbye, making plans to meet up for coffee tomorrow morning so I could catch them up on Corey and me.
Usually, I would hate for my relationship to be someone else's business, but it's been really nice to be able to have people other than my brother or my dad that I can actually talk to about stuff.
I skipped saying goodbye to the boys since they were all surrounding Corey. I walked inside, pausing before I got inside, turning to take one more glance at the boy who looked more than happy encircled by all of his friends and teammates.
"Hello babies," I squeal, squatting down to meet the pups that greeted me in the living room.
I basked in the excitement they radiated, showing them just as much love as they were showing me.
I plopped myself on the couch, instantly followed by the dogs; Henry took the spot on my lap while Blue sat in the space between my outer thigh.
As comforted as I felt with both the dogs, the only thing I was missing was my boy.
I turned on a movie, though I was hardly paying attention to what was going on. My mind was racing with thoughts of Corey and me.
I'd never imagined that we would ever have to see a couples therapist, but if that's what we needed to help us work things out, I was more than willing to do so.
The one-on-one therapy though was pushing it. I know that Corey thinks it will help, but I'm almost confident that it won't. I've done treatment before; talking about my feelings just makes it worse.
It was odd, thinking about how Corey and I had gotten into this rough past. My words (that I swear to you were not triggered by anything whatsoever) confused Corey and pushed him away. All I want is for things to be normal again.
Even though I just recently moved in, I was always with Corey. The only time we were apart was during road trips, and those only lasted for a few days, a week at the most.
I've gotten so used to sleeping next to him that it's near impossible for me to rest without the warmth of his body pressed against mine. What makes it worse is knowing that the one who keeps me warm is right down the hallway, yet I can't go to him.
He needs his space, and I respect that, but I miss him.
Talking to him today felt like a weight was lifted off of my chest, but it also had me confused. I felt like we talked things out, so why can't things just go back to normal?
My phone screen lit up, and I averted my attention away from the TV so I could reply to the text from Corey.
I'm going to go out with the guys, get some rest, Cloe. I love you.
I smile at my phone, rereading the words a thousand times over because I had missed his I love you texts.
I type it back, feeling relief that the rough patch we're in is slowly closing itself out.
"You look happy," Cody walks through the doorway holding two giant trash bags in his hands.
He grins when he sees me smiling, setting the trash bags down in the kitchen before seating himself on the ground in front of my spot on the couch.
"You didn't want to go out with the boys?" I ask, sitting up and turning more towards Cody; my brother loves going out and getting wasted; I'm surprised he's not living out the days he has until he becomes a father.
Cody shakes his head and takes his phone out of his pocket, setting it on the coffee table next to him. "I wanted to hear what happened with you and Corey."
I squint one eye, my cheek going up with it. The story is kind of hard to explain, and I have no idea on where to even start at.
"I think we're going to be okay," I say with a small smile, feeling confident saying the words, praying that if Corey would too.
"So you guys made up?"
I shake my head, "No, not exactly. We're going to couples therapy on Tuesday. I think that Corey's confused on a lot of things." I say the words, even though I didn't want them to be true. I don't want my boyfriend (I can still use that word, right?) to be confused about our relationship; I don't want him to be confused about me.
Cody nods, taking my words in while meticulously thinking of his own. "He is unclear, he's told me. He doesn't know what the line is now, and he doesn't want to cross it."
I look down, immediately feeling guilty. "Corey and I will fix this," I say, toying with the end of my curls so I wouldn't be forced to meet Cody's eyes.
"I know you guys will; you and I both know that Corey would never let you two fall apart over something like this."
I look at my brother, my lips curling slightly at the end. I love how highly Corey and Cody speak of each other. The bond they have is one of my favorites.
"I know that he won't. Corey's a great person, and I really don't deserve him, especially after all of this." I carefully move past the dogs, climbing off the couch and taking a seat on the floor next to my brother.
Cody took my and lightly squeezed it, staring me straight in the eye, "Cloe, I don't want to hear you say that anymore, ever. You deserve the world and more, and we both know that Corey will do that for you. Let him in, Clo. Let him take care of you and keep track of you, even if it makes you feel suffocated at first. It would be the best for both of you if you just let him in further than you already have."
I sigh, putting my hair up because if it's in my face, I find it hard to think. I blow away a few pieces of my baby hair, "I've let him in as far as I can," I say, knowing that it's true.
Corey and Cody know the most about me, my dad coming in second. There's nothing Corey doesn't know about, so I have no idea how to let him in further than I have. I mean sure, at times I do feel suffocated, but not by Corey alone. Cody, my dad, and even the guys and the girls can overwhelm me from time to time.
"That's where you're wrong, Cloe, and I think that this couples therapy will help you really help you."
I was sick of talking about this, so I thought of more things to talk about that could change the subject.
"Corey felt the baby pump today," I say, smiling as I do. That moment Corey and I shared in the hallway, was more intimate and romantic than anything the two of us have ever partaken in.
Cody's mood instantly changed, "How ecstatic was he?"
I chuckled, my mind racing with images of the smirk Corey had been wearing before felt the baby bump.
"He was head over heels. I can't wait until he actually gets to meet him or her."
It was Cody's turn to chuckle.
"You guys will be great parents. All you need to do is help him with mending this."