As i sit there with Isaiah sleep on me i know this moment couldnt an wouldnt last it was the heat of the moment for the both of us!! No feelings attached so i think 🤔 but maybe im wrong i know i still want to figure out away to make this work with Zayne an i cant get swept up in the moment!!
I ease off making sure i don't wake him, i walk too the shower 🚿 and i look at myself in the mirror an all i can think about is Isabella i don't know 🤷🏾♀️ how ima get thru this how did my life become so hectic an fucked up !! It feels like I'm cursed or something i cant stand it!! I gather my strength an get in my stand up shower i scrub the hell out of my skin like im trying to wash my sins away. My wounds are still tinder an fresh Im still recovering but these scars are hideous i cant deal with the way i look 👀!! I get out the shower an go in my room too my closet and i find everything possible that i could ever want its beautiful shoes, & clothes i swear he went all out!! I sit there putting on my clothes an i notice as I'm getting dressed i see Isaiah in the reflection of the mirror watching me.
" wassup Zay ??"
"I was just watching you, I'm bout too head down too eat with yo family. I guess your father want to discuss somethings with everyone. I was just going to see if u wanted to walk down with me or what ever??"
"Lol, i can see your not very good at this but sure ill accompany you down there!!"
He walks away so i can finish getting dressed i guess he has no comment on what just happened between us, but if he wont bring it up neither will i. Why, he so nice to me now i don't understand he was so rude when he first met me a couple months back! I swear niggas an there moods 😴 an they call females bipolar i beg to differ!!
I slide on something simple an casual an meet Zay by the door 🚪!! We keep are distance as we tak the elevator down. My heart ❤️ wont stop pounding this shit is out of control its like this every time im near him. Finally the damn elevator dings i hurry out making my way too the dining hall with Zay not to far behind me.
We enter the Hall and i see everyone already seated i tak my seat 💺 next too my father while Zay sits by his Sister and of course zayn is their his body language reads he's not what so ever interested in being here along with everyone else's parents. Im afraid too ask what type of meeting this is because im terrified of The answers i might get The Carters, The Valentines, The Frenchies, The Santiagos and of course my Family The Cortez are all sitting at this table !! We sit there with no conversation for a while the food starts being passed out 😵 an we all dig in!!
My dad is the first too speak " you all know what has happen in the last two weeks with my daughter an granddaughter an her mother!!"
I swear hearing him say these words were like alcohol being poured on a cut or someone making a tight fist around my heart ❤️ the tears threatened too fall but I wouldn't let them. They will NOT know how weak i am i refuse to give into that, so i sit a little straighter an I make direct contact with everyone in the room too let them know just who they are dealing with i don't know where this fire 🔥 in me cane from but I'm glad its there because with out it I probably wouldn't even make it thru the rest of this meeting alive!!!
" Yanni, i know it might be too soon to ask but i was wondering if you thought over your Decision on not taking place in this business deal ive had for you."
I look at my dad because it is a little to soon to be talking about this, but i know he's not just going let it go and i have been thinking that this might be a good move for me instead of me being out of loop on everything thats going on.
"Yes father ive thought about it and i think its best if i did take my spot but only on one condition!!??"
"Ok and whats the terms, baby girl ??"
"I and everyone here can marry who ever we wont because honestly I'm not ready for marriage I'm only 18 and i need to get myself more established and more trained for this whole ordeal we have going on. NO MORE of these fucked traditions y'all got going on and no forcing no one to do nothing they don't want to do. Im not taking NO for answer either, because as much as you don't want to admit it you need me to close off this circle ⭕️ seeing how your granddaughter is no longer with us any more. I will run everything my way on my terms i have nothing to do with everyone else approach on there ends with there business plan but mine
Will be ran with a iron fist once I'm caught up everything that I haven't been apart of these last 18 years !! Do we have and agreement mr.Cortez?? "
"Ok, thats fine !!"
"Daddy seriously 😒 you just gave in that easily it has to be some trick to it!!"
He starts laughing 😂
"Its no trick you made a compelling argument and its hard too say no to such a beautiful face as yours. I have one condition tho too !!??"
"Ok, and what could it possibly be !!"
"You have too marry someone in the next year anybody you like i do not care as long as
They can help you maintain your position when the time comes for you to gain full access too your whole estate 🏡 who you pick will determine your own future an everyone else's Ya'vanni please don't disappoint me baby girl!!"
"Ok well thats a lot to tak in but im find with that !!"
"Do anyone at this table disagree if so say I!"
I see 6 that disagree an the other 11 agree!!
Hmmm 🤔 my first business deal lol, i guess i got thang for these type of things !!
"Ok it is settle everyone engagements are off unless you feel other wise with the person you are with which i assume Dino an Tam will continue as they are an chance an Reni will as well!!"
I don't even look 👀 at neither one of my brothers directions, cause i still don't have shit to say to them. Of course if my father thinks we are not getting along he is gonna do something I'm not goin to agree with. I have this gut feeling he's about to !!
" Dino, Yetta, Doni, Chance, Chase & Mecca, i need you to show your sister the ropes!! Its time she knows what we really do!!"
I don't object too it i just feel like i need a fresh new day i don't feel like getting straight into that yet i really need some me time. So i get up from the table and look towards my father !!
" just bring me all the paperwork an I'll fill myself in with the little parts an we can continue the rest in a week if thats ok 👌🏾 with you Father?? I do still-need to get my strength up and get myself together i did just lose my daughter ."
With that he shakes his head ok, im thnking everything about to be over but Stephanie speaks!!
"You don't seem like you need to much rest how you and an Isaiah had each other tongues down each other throat or the fact that i seen u kissing Zayne before you left the hospital ."
She thru a little laugh in behind her statement and now every one ☝🏾 is looking at me!! I look to zayne an Isaiah an then my eyes 👀 fall on Hera who looks mad 😡 disappointed and hurt 😔 !!
She gets up an speaks " so this is why you you made that condition?? You wanted to be able to marry anyone because you think 🤔 you have a shot with zayne. Well your wrong little girl, you are nothing but a baby compared to me an for Zayne sake your not no were near ready for what we have been preparing for are whole lives!! You just popped up out no were, how are we even sure your Mr. Cortez's long lost daughter your behavior says other wise. But you listen up an you listen good you little Trick me an Zayne we are going to get married. Rather you like it not if he was interested in you its long gone now so leave him alone an stay away from him I'm only goin to say this once an i think you should stay away from my brother NO stay far away from my brother and i mean that. Or you will be the reason why blood will shed and on top of that its bad enough u cant keep yo hands off Zayne but you go in right after an kiss my brother you ain't nothing but a hoe!! I do not feel sorry 😐 about anything that has happened to you, I'm starting to realize how much you probably deserved it ."
"Aye look 👀 shorty girl don't b talking too my best friend like that she maybe a-lot of things but no one deserves what she just endured an for you to come out your mouth like that I'm shocked 😱 she hasn't punched you in it yet !!"
I walk over in put my hand 🤚🏾 on tam shoulder to calm her down !!
"Its ok Tam i deserve this I've been hurt enough that this right here isn't shit i cant get passed. Her out burst doesn't even compare too the trauma an damage that i have continued too go through"
I look at Hera an i feel her pain but i think 🤔 it's time for me to shed some mother fucking light and truth behind this bullshit !!
" you are entitled too how ever you feel, but i don't appreciate being called out of my name in front of my father. I also don't feel the need too explain my actions too you but i will if it will shut you up!! I kissed zayne yes something I've wanted to do sense the day i laid eyes on him. When i ran out of my baby 👶🏾 shower, see we have this connection i will never understand or i cant explain, but baby girl if he is truly happy with you i will let him be great 👍🏾. But for me kissing your brother it was the heat of the moment type shit, just ask him!! I wanted to break off the engagement because i felt like it was the right thang to do for myself i cant marry someone i hardly know or even if i did not know him I'm just not ready. My life doesn't make sense anymore an i don't think it ever will an to drag him into something like that is just plain on wrong and don't make my choices about you or about what i have done ✅ because in reality your not me !! So you can live your life being that pampered beautiful princess 👸🏾. While ill be what i am WHICH is Hood if you ain't get the memo 📝 instead of trying to be this stuck up bitch that no one likes !! You and Stephanie need too live alittle an stop doing what mommy says an figure out what the hell ya'll want cause its obvious by your choices an lack of the out side world you don't know !!"
I walk away with my head hell high, because I'm about too live my best life instead of living a fucking lie !!