amy immediately rises from the floor, coming over to me. rosa soon followed. even though I wasn't a detective and I didn't work at the nine-nine, these guys were definitely my family and my best friends in the world.
"oh my god, what happened?" amy asked, sitting me down on the couch. I sighed before I could even think on responding.
"well, he seemed to be real offended by my answer to the question. i seriously wasn't trying to hurt him, i was just being honest! but he kind of took offense to it and believed that i was trying to cut him out of my life so he did it instead" i explain, allowing a small tear to slip down my cheek.
"have i caused this?" terry says quietly from behind me. i turn my body to see him hunched in a ball with a nervous look on my face. i roll my eyes slightly.
"of course not, terry. don't be stupid" i assure, giving him a weak smile.
"no! no! this is not supposed to happen. you and jake are supposed to get married and have kids and grow old together! that's how i planned this for the three of us!" charles exclaimed, shooting up from the carpet. gina loudly groaned as she repeated his actions but slower.
"look, i think it would be best for us to give y/n some space" amy suggests, looking at her fellow detectives. they all nodded in agreement, giving me comforting hugs one by one before they left my apartment.
i sit alone, on the cold floor, at half one in the morning with a half empty bottle of vodka. i should be sat with my boyfriend and his co-workers, playing spin the bottle and getting wasted and having the best night. well, i'm still getting wasted, just not with anyone else.
i take a huge chug of the vodka, the intoxicating liquid sliding down my throat, burning every piece of tissue it touched. i cringe as it does so and blatently stare at the blank tv in front of me. as i do so, my eyes divert to the fireplace beside it. on there was a photograph of jake and i, from our first anniversary a couple of months ago. it was him and me, at shaw's bar, with drinks in our hands and huge smiles on our faces. jake's arms were wrapped around me from behind and honestly it was the best feeling.
now, i was sat in a lonely pile on the floor. i take another huge swing of the vodka and from that point, i really don't remember much of that night.
-------------------
my eyes reluctantly open however they soon squeeze shut again as the bright may sunshine came through the window. a groggy moan fell from my lips as i push my body up. i glance around to realise that i was lied on the living room floor. confusion takes over me before i look around a little further and see bottles of beer and vodka surrounding me.
and like the memory of drinking, the memory of heartbreak comes back to me. my subconscious reminded me of the events that took place last night, before i passed out due to the alcohol. i realise that for the first time in pretty much a year and a half, i was single and that i was dumped, because of me.
i sigh, tightly gripping the sofa and solely relying on it to get me off the floor. i shout in pain as i stand up straight and a sharp pain shoots through my head. my eyes widen as i bring my hands to massage it to try and relieve the incredible pain i was in.
i waddle to the kitchen, grabbing a glass and two asprins from the cupboard. as i take the medication, i hear my phone ping from somewhere in the apartment. i look around for it and see it nowhere. it's only when i hear it ringing that i finally discover that it was behind a cushion on the couch. a familiar name pops up on the screen and i swipe across. before i could even say hello, a panicked voice comes through the device.
"y/n, get to jake's apartment now. there's a situation" rosa demands before immediately hanging up the phone. i couldn't even question or speak for that matter before the line went dead. rosa wasn't a person to panic. rosa wasn't a person to feel any emotion for that matter, so i knew this was serious.
grabbing my phone, my keys, some money and my jacket, i head over to jake's place. he only lived three blocks away so there was no need for my car. also, i don't think me driving is the wisest choice at the moment.
running up the stairs, i burst into jake's apartment to see rosa pacing around the living room.
"what's wrong?" i ask in worry. she beckons me to follow her and she leads me into his bedroom. there, laid on the floor, was an unconscious jake. he was surrounded by bottles of vodka, tequilla and beer. guess he got more wild that me last night.
"oh my god. shit, rosa, call an ambulance" i say but she claims she did before she called me. i get on the floor, feeling jake's pulse and not recognising anything. my heart immediately starts to race as i don't feel the familiar pump of regular blood flow. i pull him up to me, leaning my back against his bed and holding him in my arms. i lightly pat his face with my palm to see if he'd respond. nothing.
"jake, please. don't do this to me. you can't leave me. we're going to get married and travel the world and have kids together. please" i beg. a clatter was heard through the apartment and seconds later, three paramedics came through. without an ounce of thought or communication, they carefully lifted jake up onto the stretcher. they placed an oxygen mask on his face and started to wheel him out.
we got down the stairs and one of the paramedics claimed that only one of us can come with him in the ambulance.
"you go, he loves you. i'll drive there" rosa says. i nod my head, slightly smiling at the fact rosa said that jake loved me. i shake my head, bidding goodbye before climbing into the ambulance. the two paramedics did a few tests and recorded his results.
"are you the girlfriend?" one asked, holding a clipboard and pen in his hand, writing down analysis and not looking up at me. i think of how to respond to the question without somehow getting the blame on this, it wasn't needed at this point.
"yes, i am" i reply, sending him a small smile.
within minutes, we reached the brooklyn methodist hospital. with the help of the driver, the paramedics got jake safely out of the ambulance and took him inside.
"you can't come through, not just yet" a nurse ordered, putting her hands up to stop me. i was about to argue however i think that it's not worth it. i groan as i throw myself down on one of the chairs in the waiting room. my elbows rest on my knees as my hands sit over my mouth, sheer panic taking over me as i think of every worst case scenario that could possibly happen to jake.
"y/n!" i hear a voice shout. i glance up to see the whole nine-nine flooding into the waiting room. i was too broken and worried to stand up and greet them.
"rosa's filled us in on what's happened" captain holt sadly said. i nod my head, my lips pressing onto my teeth as i look at everyone. they pretty much had the same expression as i did.
"jake can't do this! we're supposed to die together! him dying in a huge explosion and me committing suicide out of respect!" charles exclaims and he sits acorss from me. this was no time for laughing but i couldn't help but chuckle at him. everyone shoots him a look as he mentions jake dying. this, of course, panicked me even more.
after around half an hour of anxious waiting, a doctor came out.
"jake peralta?" he announces, all nine of us quickly standing up and walking towards the doctor.
"he's going to be just fine however he has drunk himself into a coma. it's not clear how long he's going to be in this coma, it could be an hour, it could be a year, we're going to closely monitor his progress but you can see him now" he explains, clutching jake's records and results close to his chest. he nods his head at us before leaving to assisst another patient.
"i think y/n should see him first, it only seems right" terry suggests, agreeing hums coming from the rest of the squad. i weakly smile at them all before making my way down the corridor to jake's assigned room. i take a deep breath before i walked in.
there he lied. lifeless. asleep. dreaming. there was a nasal cannula attached his his face and and cannula inserted into his arm. regular beeps were heard on the machine beside him and his breathing was barely visually recognisable.
i take another deep breath to avoid breaking down there and then. i sigh before sitting myself down in the chair situated beside his bed. i instantly grab his hand, lightly stroking the back of it.
"jakey, baby, please don't do this, i can't possibly bear the thought of losing you. you're literally the thing i love the most in the world, i love you more than life itself. i would take a million bullets for you and you know that. i wanna know why you did this to yourself. why? never mind, it's because of you, i did this to you" i say. i turn my head, still keeping my hand intertwined with jake's and my other hand covered my mouth, small sobs being stifled by it. taking yet another deep breath, i close my eyes and turn my head back to the man before me.
"please wake up jake, i need you. i love you so so much and you cannot leave me, not now. please" i beg. as if my magic or some sort of miracle, i feel a light squeeze on my hand. my head snaps up to see jake's eyes starting to open. i gasp, getting a slightly tighter grasp on his hand.
a weak groan is heard from him and his half open eyes meet my hopeful ones.
"y/n? where am i? and why does it smell?" he asks, whispering.
"you're at the hospital. you drank youself into a coma" i explain, stroking his hand. he puts his head up, glancing around the room and then back at me. the look on his face was hard to explain. it was a mixture of pain, confusion, anger, sadness, all mixed into one. he turns away from me, looking up at the machine that was showing his heart rate.
"i'm the reason you ended up here. i'm the reason you're lying here in pain" i whisper. he shakes his head, looking back at me.
"don't say that. ok? i put myself here by acting out, please don't blame yourself" he assures me. i didn't take his words for a single second but i simply nodded, not wanting to start any arguments.
"and all that stuff you were saying, you'd take a million bullets for me. pretty sweet. i mean anyone would take a million bullets for me but whatever" he says, bringing a smile to my face.
"jake, ignore all the stuff i said last night. i'd love to marry you and have kids with you" i tell him, leaning forward in my chair and grabbing his hand again. he glances down at that before back up at me.
"seriously?" he says in shock, widening his eyes. i nod my head, showing a smile.
"we have to travel the world first though. go to france and england" he urges, naming random european places. i chuckle, stroking his arm.
"i love you" jake says, smiling back at me.
"i love you too" i reply, leaning over to passioantely press my lips to his. as we do so, the nine-nine walk in. they loudly cheer as they see us but jake and i shout in pain.
"hangover!" we scream at them, letting out loud groans before we all laugh at mine and jake's stupid hangover.
a/n this is literally the longest chapter this book has i'm so sorry