Edited
Leila's POV
Skeptical
Something soft touched my cheek, then it trickled to my arm, then back up to my cheek again. I giggled at the tickling sensation that rippled through my body and turned over once it had stopped. Unfortunately for me, what followed next was not exactly how I expected my first morning of school to pan out.
"WAKE UP!"
I sprung upright at the blaring voice that pierced through my ears and peeled my burning eyes open to find professor Kingston standing at the foot of the bed already adorned in his work attire. "What the hell is your problem?!" I don't care if he's a professor here. Just the fact that it was confirmed that he's in my age group—meaning he's between 20 to 25—is enough for me to knock back the respect just a tad bit.
And also the fact that he's also an asshole.
Although he did finally give in and allowed me to sleep on his bed—which was extremely uncomfortable seeing as our dynamic is gravely imbalanced—he's still an A-hole. His sharp jawline and ocean blue eyes aren't enough to sway me.
"My problem is watching you sleep comfortably on my bed whilst I run around the room preparing for class like a responsible person. I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that your first lecture is 9 am. It's currently 8:30."
"Well, why didn't you wake me up sooner?!"
He gazed back at me in astonishment. It's only been one night in this room with this man and I already can't stand his guts. He rubs me off as a condescending asshole who just doesn't have a nice bone in his body. Understandable guy my ass. "Oh, I'm sorry but I don't recall waking up an unexpected roommate for school was on my job description when I was offered this job."
He does have a point. And regardless of how and what time he woke me up, he still chose to do so. He could have left without so much as a word and yet still here we are. At least I have half an hour to prepare. "Now that this is settled," he said as he straightened his tie, "don't be late for my class." His class?! He's my English professor? There's absolutely no way.
Before I could ask him to elaborate further, he sauntered out of the room, leaving me with a pounding headache, unprepared for school and quite possibly a thousand questions. I don't think my current situation has dawned on me yet. I'm sharing a dorm room with a professor. A MALE professor.
Reese is gonna freak.
I climbed out of bed and began to prepare for class. After taking a quick shower, I was forced to do a light natural makeup look seeing as I have little time left. Once I had climbed into my blue ditsy floral dress, I finished off my look with a pair of converse sneakers, retrieved my side bag from beside my unemptied suitcase and rushed out of the room.
I usually skipped breakfast back home for the sole purpose of avoiding my father in the mornings and only ate once he went to work or at school during lunch. So skipping a meal or two has no effect on me. After locking the door behind me, I began to trek down the hallway with my head still hanging low as I tried to place them in my bag.
This, however, led to me bumping into something hard which sent me careening to the floor. I cried in pain as my butt planted against the tiles and shot my death glare up at the girl staring down at me in shock. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" She shrieked. "Drake help her up!"
"Why me!?" Standing beside her was a bulky-looking guy. He pouted his lips as he outstretched a hand toward me. I gladly took it and he hoisted me onto my feet swiftly. "We're so sorry, we didn't see you coming this way." The guy said as he tugged the brown-haired girl into his arms. "She's a bit of a clutz you see."
The girl extended a hand towards me, "I'm sorry again. My name is Sam, short for Samantha and this is my boyfriend Drake." I stared down at her hand, perplexed. After the incident that occurred years ago, I lost all my friends. No one wanted to befriend the girl who ripped two ripe fruits from a flourishing tree because of her incompetence.
I became the outcast of my school.
Although everyone knew what happened was not directly my fault, I was still blamed for simply being a victim. What's new? In a world that fetishes its own misery and that of others, how could I possibly expect people to look upon me with sympathy rather than animosity?
I ate alone, sat alone, and went home alone. I'm sure there were people who felt sorry for me. I'm sure they looked to me as a victim rather than the leading cause behind two innocent lives being lost. But the opinions and sympathy of others were not what I craved.
I craved that validation from the people I called my friends since I could remember. But so as to not get dragged down by the abyss that continues to ensnare me, they gradually fell off the string of my life, leaving me entangled in threads just patiently waiting to snap under the pressure.
I was left all alone, gazing at the remnants of a seemingly normal life.
Like I said...
I'm reduced to nothing.
Sensing my hesitation, Samantha grabbed my hand and shook it gently, "what's your name?" She asked with a bright smile on her face. "Jeez, Sam you're freaking her out." I laughed softly at the horrified look on her boyfriend's face. "I-it's Leila but everyone calls me Lei for short." She retracted her hand and signalled to my bag, "What year are you? Can I see your schedule? What's your major?"
"Sam!"
"What!? I'm just being friendly," she chirped.
I don't know if I want friends. They stab you in the back once they have nothing left to gain from the friendship and leave you to fend for yourself. I've been bamboozled by my own best friend so to say I'm hesitant is an understatement.
"Uhm, I'm year one and my major is graphics design." Her eyebrows arched upward and her face lit up with excitement, "oh my god, I do Studio Arts! So we might be in some of the same classes! Can I see your schedule!?"
What. The. Hell.
"I-"
"Sam, maybe she's not comfortable with that. Stop being pushy." Drake hissed. Her smile suddenly faltered as if she had just realized how persistent she was. "Oh, I'm sorry I just–never mind. I don't mean to make you feel uncomfortable." She said as she scratched the nape of her neck nervously.
But. . .she does seem genuine. Should I give her a chance? Maybe we'll hardly see one another after today. Maybe our courses really don't coincide. Friendships and acquaintanceships hardly last in college anyway so I have nothing to worry about.
Right?
~~~
Wrong.
She's in my class. Actually, she's in both my Drawing and English literature class so I get to see her twice a day for six hours and god knows if I'll run into her in the hallway or in our dorms. It's not that she isn't a sweet person but I think it's only fair that I'm skeptical seeing as I've been stabbed in the back by the people I trusted the most.
"Are you hungry? If you didn't know there are three services here! One: the food court that has all the fast food restaurants you can think of, Subway; Panda Express; McDonald's; Starbucks! Then there's the all you can eat buffet house for on campus residents which is us obviously. However we do have to pay a monthly fee but it's only like 100 dollars. And lastly there's the campus lunch room. It has a cafe, a snack bar and they also sell pizza, hotdogs and burgers. So where do you wanna go?"
Doesn't this girl have friends? Why is she still clinging onto me? "I–I don't know."
Her eyebrows perked upwards, "I'm so hungry! Let's just go to the food court."
"When are you never not hungry?" An unfamiliar voice exclaimed just a few feet ahead of us. Approaching us was a girl I'd never seen before. She was relatively short, brown-skinned, dimpled smile and sparkling brown eyes. She raised a hand and waved as she approached us. Sam rushed into the girls' arms, giving me the breathing room that I desperately needed.
"Midge! Ugh, I knew I should have eaten breakfast. Do you hear that shit? That's the sound of a war beginning." She said as she motioned to her growling stomach. "You should have listened to me and eaten breakfast this morning," Midge said before her gaze slid toward me. "Who's this?" She inquired, her smile widening.
"Oh, Midge this is Leila, my new friend and Leila this is Midge, my roommate." Her new friend? Seriously, I just got here and a malfunction caused my room to be given to someone else. I'm stuck with MY PROFESSOR as my roommate and these two random girls have befriended me.
If someone were to ask what my expectations for college were prior to this, I'd simply say nothing much. I'd keep my head down, focus on class and aim to graduate after my three years here. But already, I've been thrown into the lion's den. "Nice to meet you, Leila." Midge waved her hand and with a small nervous smile, I returned the gesture.
"What year are you, by the way?"
"One."
"Oh! I'm year two, so is Sam." She said as she threw her hand around Samantha's shoulders.
"Come on guys, I texted Drake to save us a seat." Sam dragged both Midge and I down the hallway toward the food court. Although it felt like forever, once we were at the food court I couldn't help but sigh in relief, knowing that Samantha's attention would shift away from me if she were to meet her friends.
Now all I need to do is find an excuse to escape. I don't have any assignments seeing as this is only the first week of class. Maybe I could just say I'm tired? "There they are!" Before I could fight against Samantha's tight grip, she tugged me toward the table sitting outside what appeared to be a Chinese restaurant.
Sat there was Drake and also the guy who I met in the elevator yesterday. I remember him giving me his number that I gladly tossed in the trash later that night. But what was his name again? "Peter?" I slapped a hand over my mouth, realizing once again that my brain had bested me as I absentmindedly said my thoughts aloud.
Peter peered up from his plate of food and directed his gaze toward me. His eyes zoned in on Samantha's hand wrapped around mine then up to my face. I couldn't tell if he was annoyed or relieved by the fact that the two of us were together. "Of all people to be friends with Sam." He grumbled.
So I was right.
"Fancy seeing you here, darling. Maybe it's fate and maybe...just maybe Sam is my Angel for befriending you." His head cocked, "why didn't you call me?" Oh, so he's that type of guy. "I told you I have a boyfriend. And I crushed your note."
His mouth fell agape as he leaned back with one hand draped across his chest and the other pressed against his cheek, "that hurt, you know. So uncalled for."
"How do you know this idiot?" Samantha asked as she slumped down beside Drake. Peter turned his attention toward her, "well darling, she was just a lucky girl who I ran into in the elevator. I gave her my number and she rejected me just now."
"I wonder why, Peter. Maybe it's because you don't know boundaries." Midge's snarky remark didn't seem to sit well with the pompous one as he shot her a glare. She sat down beside him and motioned to the empty seat across from her.
This is my chance to come up with an excuse to leave. I don't feel comfortable suddenly letting myself indulge in the idea of having friends again. Even at my old jobs I kept everything strictly professional. I declined when I was invited to go out, never attended staff parties, ate alone in the back room.
I kept to myself to protect my heart.
I don't want to get hurt again.
"Leila?" I snapped my head toward Peter, "you good?" He asked in concern. Everyone's attention was now on me. Their gazes shot through my skin and nestled against every functioning nerve within my body, once again paralyzing me.
If I sit down will I make a mistake?
But if I leave I'll be making another.
I can't win.
"Hey, if you're not comfortable it's understandable." Midge said, sensing the hesitance in my expression. Samantha smiled, "yeah, I'm sorry for dragging you here. I probably should have asked if you wanted to come."
"You think, Sam?!" Drake nudged her in the arm.
If I sit down.
What will happen?
One by one, the cords entangled within my joints began to loosen as I took a step forward, then another and another until I was stood at the base of the metal chair. I sat down with my heart galloping within the engaged walls of my chest.
There's only one way to find out what will happen.
"Yay! Are you sure you're okay? You look really pale. Do you want some water?" Samantha's arm outstretched across the table to touch my trembling hand. She is really sweet. I can tell just by looking into her eyes that this isn't an act.
Maybe...maybe this won't be so bad.
Maybe I won't regret sitting down.
"She's fine, Sam. Stop touching her." Peter swatted her hand away. "So what? You can be a pervert and touch her instead?"
"Hey! Screw you princess!"
"Don't play Peter any mind. He's just like that. Always been and always will be. He's like an animated character with a limited amount of dialogue. His most notorious line is 'I'm a conceited asshole so please love me for I am in desperate need of love." Sam exclaimed as if that was supposed to be reassuring.
I couldn't care less.
"Hey," Peter drew my attention toward him. He leaned across the table with what I can only describe as an attempted seductive smirk, "I'll make you fall in love with me by the end of this semester. What do you think?"
What I think is I'm already regretting sitting down.
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