We sit in silence the entire way back to campus. I didn't know how to feel. I glance over at Ash who has had an angry expression on his face since we left James' apartment.
I'm startled by my phone ringing inside my bag. I rummage through and pull it out. I look at the screen wide-eyed, oh no! Home Phone.
I swipe to answer and hold the phone to my ear.
"Hello, Kaia?!" My mom's voice booms through the phone. She's angry.
I look down and cover my eyes with my hand, I know exactly what this is about.
"Hello mom" I said in a low tone, waiting for her to hit me with her anger.
"Kaia Rose Collins, you've got some explaining to do. You can start with the pictures" Mom said.
My heart begins to pound as I think of what to say. I hate it when mom is upset or angry with me, I've always tried to do my best and keep her happy. Today I've done the complete opposite.
"Mom. First of all, I'm sorry. What you saw online- that's not me. I mean, it is me but--"
"Stop! Just tell me what led you do act like that? I'm pretty sure I didn't raise you to be some girl who goes out late at night and gets photographed posing like a wh*re!" Mom spat and I couldn't help the tears that were streaming down my face.
I swallowed hard, trying to act like I wasn't crying.
"I'm sorry that I've disappointed you mom. I'm sorry" I said in a serious voice before hanging up on her.
I drop my phone in my bag and cry into my hands. Ash parks the car just outside my room and turns to face me.
"What's wrong, love?" he asks.
"My..mom, she saw..the pictures" I answered, getting out of the car.
Ash gets out of the car and races towards me, wrapping me up in his arms. I'm angry with him and I want to push him away but I also want to be held. I don't know how to feel about Ash anymore. He dumps me for Yvonne then runs to my rescue, I don't know how his mind works.
"Stop crying, in a week this mess will be over and your mom will speak to you again" he said.
"How do you know, Ash? My mom called me a wh*re and she's never uttered a curse in her life" I said, wiping my tears.
Ash sighs and holds me tighter.
"I know it's too soon but I'd like it if you came up to my room with me, there's something I've been wanting to tell you" Ash says.
I release myself from his hold and look up at him. He looked sincere and caring, his eyes looked like they were pleading with me. Ash wipes my tears as he waits for my answer.
I take one last deep breath before responding to him. I hope I'm making the right choice.
"Okay" I said quietly.
"I'll go with you".
Ash flashes me half a smile before we start walking to his room. I walk closely behind him. When we get to the second floor, Ash walks up to the first door on the right. He unlocks it then steps aside to let me in first.
"You've changed rooms" I said, as I stepped inside. His room was clean with not a single piece of clothing on the floor. His bed was made up neatly and his books were stacked properly on top his study table. On the right, he had a couch, the same brown couch from his old room and a small shelf where he kept all his camera stuff.
"Yeah, I've also learnt to keep it tidy" he says with a smile.
Oh that smile! How I've missed it.
"That's good" I said, still standing awkwardly.
"Please Kaia, take a seat" he says.
I walk over to the couch, remove my bag and take a seat. Ash is seated on the edge of his bed, just opposite me.
I look down at the floor, not even sure why I wanted to come up here with him. This just complicates things even more.
Ash hunches over forward and runs his fingers through his hair. He looks tensed, like he's about to drop a bomb on me.
"Kaia, the way things ended between us---"
"No. Please don't mention that again, please" I cut him off.
He looks up at my face then sighs.
"Kaia, let me talk please. I promise it will be worth your time" he said.
The look on his face tells me that maybe he's sincere, maybe this is not another game.
"Okay, fine" I said, folding my arms and leaning back.
"Now, as I was saying before you cut me off- the way things ended between us was bad and I apologize for that. I liked you Kaia and I still like you now but that night at the party was just a big mess and I'm sorry I did that to you".
"You don't have to apologize, it's been six weeks now since the incident and I feel that if you were truly sorry, you would have apologized on the same night" I said.
"I tried to Kaia, please believe me. But Yvonne made me stay. She told me not to go after you that night. I didn't wanna hurt you Kaia, you mean everything to me".
I can't believe he just said that. I don't think I mean everything to him. If I did, we would still be together right now.
"I think Yvonne means more to you than I do" I said, grabbing my bag and attempting to leave.
Ash stops me and puts my bag back down. He gently holds me and asks me to sit back down.
And like the mindless robot that I am, I take a seat again.
"Yvonne means nothing to me, nothing at all. She blackmailed me that night, she threatened to go to the cops about my dad's business. Her dad is a cop so I had to do whatever she wanted and that night she wanted to put on a show in front of everyone. You just happened to be there when it took place" he said, looking down at the floor.
I stare at him for a while, not saying anything-- just looking at him. He looks frustrated, he keeps running his fingers through his hair, I'm pretty sure he's done that more than 3 times in the past 2 minutes.
"So you're telling me you don't like her?" I asked curiously.
"I hate her Kaia, I really do. She tore us apart and I won't stop until I have something to use against her the way she did to me" Ash said.
Thinking of everything Ash is telling me right now, I think I've been underestimating Yvonne this whole time. This shows that she can go to any lengths to rid me from Ash's life. I'm beginning to think that it was her that planted the drugs in Ash's apartment then tipped the cops off.
"If everything you're saying is true, why didn't you just tell me after it happened? You could have saved me from a alot of crying sessions and being depressed" I said to him.
"I thought it would be best if I stayed away from you. I'm not a good person. I didn't want to put you in danger. I'm sorry you had to go through what you did, trust me- I thought about you every single day after that" he said.
I take a deep breath and look around his room, trying to take in everything he's telling me.
"So it was all because of her?" I asked.
"Yes! Kaia, yes!" Ash says, slipping off the bed and kneeling before me.
"Well, what happens now?" I asked impatiently. I don't know where this is headed.
Ash moves closer to me and places a hand on my tear stained cheek.
"I don't know what will happen but one thing's for sure. I'm in love with you Kaia and I don't want to fight it anymore. I can't stay away from you and I won't".
My hearts leaps up into my throat, beating wildly and I swallow hard to put it back in place.
I think I've turned pale because my fingers feel icy cold.
Ash is now just inches away from my face and I close my eyes, not able to look into his deep green eyes. I can't.
It's as if my body has a mind of it's own when Ash suddenly kisses me and I respond to it almost immediately.
As our kiss gets more heated, he wraps me up in his arms and I wrap my legs around him. It feels like I'm on a cloud again. I feel stress free, calm. It's like all the best feelings in one.
Ash slowly stands up and carries me over to his bed, his lips never breaking from mine. I feel so lost in this moment, this is all I've craved for since we parted. I run my fingers through his hair as he gently places me on his bed.
Now he's hovering over me and his breath lightly fans my face.
I open my eyes to look at him. He looks angelic. His eyes look lighter than before and he looks heavenly on top of me.
"I'm in love with you too, Ash" I say with a smile.
"I knew it" he says with a smirk.
He kisses me again, this time with more passion. He tastes divine and I don't want to break away from him. Ash plants kisses all over my neck and I feel euphoric. My heart is beating so fast I feel as if it's going to pop out of my chest anytime.
"Can we?" he asks as he slides his hand down to my jeans. He then stops and waits for my response.
"Yes" I say breathlessly.
"Please".