when lam said about internships forth ask him "I want to know who they are?"
lam gives him a knowing smirk and hand him the profiles, his eyes got stuck by seeing beam name after so many year he is seeing beam name again and his photo, after ten years he find beam is still cute
he is asking lam "this is my beam right!"
lam gives a teasing smile "oh.. My beam"
"aie lam"
"And you are still not over that schoolboy, come on aie forth, it is been ten years..." Lam sighs frowning for his friend still being in past
"It's not my fault, it was not planned he himself came to me, I cannot let go of my chance, once he used me he trashed my feelings, now he will face me!" Forth gritted firmly holding the file
Lam shook "he is just fifteen to understand your feelings"
"So you're saying I am childish when I am being used for five years, he is fifteen when I met him and I did wait for years he knew I had feelings for him, he Is not an innocent but just a play fish."
"So what! Now you suddenly wish to take revenge on a grown-up doctor" lam snipes on his friend behavior
Forth sigh "you don't understand my pain he played with my feelings and it hurts me"
Lam knew how much forth used to love the schoolboy and how excited and happy in meeting beam, he usually waits for every
"thank you lam" he smirk with his imagination going wild "...I enjoy this prey after many years" they both clapped their hands and bump it.
on interaction day he knowingly avoided beam. he and lam acted according to the plan as if we both does not remember him
On the day of their interview, lam observe forth stealing glances of beam and forth was trying his best to avoid beam desperate eyes, and lam also finds the way beam looks and speaks, he observes one particular thing in beam eyes, he can see the desperation of beam being aware of forth and expecting the same, but lam went according to forth plan as if he don't know who beam is! Likewise, both the friends keep avoiding each other.
*****
after the interactions kit and beam followed forth. He give some case files to kit "...kit study those files, meanwhile, you absent-minded kid come with me" he said in a doctor tone he can feel he is beam being nervous.
As they both walk-in, beam is looking to forth closing the door, and strides to his working chair, having seated in his place
"tell me beam, where is your mind?"
Beam gulped a loud lump "sorry p'f..," he again regained conscious on what he is saying and again he apologized "sorry sir" he thought forth is asking him his attitude in interview room so he apologized
"How are you? after these many years" once they are alone his pretending game is over
Beam got surprised for forth asking him as if they are familiar now, he looks to forth cold eyes "I am fine phee, p'forth do you remember me? I thought phee don't remember me."
Beam thought, It is because of interview and forth being in a profession he pretend to be unfamiliar with him, but now seeing forth asking about his well-being he could not think much to ask him if he still remembers him either the way he wants to ask if he still remembers who beam is! but he could not dare to ask him as he still remember after how cold he was while rejecting forth in the past, that guilty feelings ties beam tongue he could not form any words, and it's ten years, and he was not sure to ask about his senior feelings on him when he can feel all cold vibes from forth
propping elbows on table forth said "what do you think?" he speaks in a cold tone sending a shiver of fear to beam's spine, his cold aura emitting to all sides of the room, making the standing beam sticks to his spot
He looks to forth cold eyes "p'forth, it's been ten years, but you.u still remember me..I..I "
he was about to speak something but forth raise his hand which make beam to seal his, that is enough for forth to confirm that beam still remembers him! and what he did to forth!, seeing forth as his doctor, now he thinks beam is trying to pretend to act like he is apologetic for what happen ten years ago
"you did not change a bit..still that selfish beam" forth cold words were like sword slicing beam heart into pieces
"still the same, well no one ever used me like you! How can I forget such a valuable face, you just make me revolve around you and finally dump my feelings saying a simple answer 'you don't like me; and now what! after ten years you're seeking to be innocent to get save from your senior doctor" he smirk with his words sending a warning to beam spine
Beam was gripping tears in his anger-filled hurt eyes, forth is having such a bad impression on him
Forth could not believe those true words of his own thoughts about beam! would bring tears to beam doe eyes! he did not intend to hurt him, but the past was making him speak all the pain he went through! he wants to say beam rejection is still painting him, Instead, he just spout some non-sense words; all the time he is with the school kid he never once felt beam is trying to cheat him for money, but the rejection is what forth did not expect he thought beam will reciprocate his feelings, but he was rejected, exactly why! When they Is no reason to reject such a good looking, protective, caring senior and they both equally cares for each other and suddenly the latter person rejected his feelings, He don't have any other reasons except to say that beam just makes forth twirl around him and spend his money,
in fact when forth is the one who did that spending! when beam don't even ask him for a penny from his pockets , yet still somehow he settled with that reason, just to sooth his heart blaming beam cheats on him, so that will decrease the growing pain of his heart and helps him keeping his broken heart from sway, the same night he lost his mother, and they both did not have a chance to meet again and it was ten years already, they are still waiting for each other one is waiting and the other is pretending to resent his own feelings, thinking that will ease his pain. But he was wrong seeing tears in beam oceanic eyes the pain is increasing for forth.
Forth walks out from chair, to lock-hurt beam into his embrace, beam keeps his head down he is not looking up in process of trying to not let forth to see his teary eyes,
Forth walks near and leans closer to beam ear lobe with an inch gap between his lips and beam ear lobe, he whisper "...your life will be miserable from now on! beam do you think that I would forget about what you did to me,.....never beam....and from now on remember I am just Dr.forth to everyone understand. I never think you yourself will come into my cage beam, I thought I need to run after you to haunt you. But thank you beam you yourself came to me I will show my other side only to you."
Beam tightly sealed his quivering bottom lip and trying not to let a sob escape from his lips, he is already living a miserable life, forth is the only way he always and use to think and pray, but now he don't know what should he hope for! while making a living for himself and his grandmother
Beam not daring enough to speak a word he walks out closing the door, he walks to his allotted floor where he needs to take care of patients who are operated and staying under observance of doctors he stumbles to chair remembering the cold words from forth and what just happen between them is hurting him, it especially breaks his heart someone is gripping his heart and bleeding him purposefully "It hurts like hell!!" beam keeps rubbing his chest.
"Why did you change this much p'forth? why do you hate me this much....you're so cold I dreamed for you all these years p'forth and now it was like a biggest nightmare to me p'forth. I cannot bear it, my heart cannot take it p'forth..." he is sobbing and sobbing gripping his heart with tears drenching his cheeks "..it was my mistake you turned out to be a different..I.. I can see that I am sorry for everything I had done, please don't treat me like this, I waited for you all these long years just with a hope that you would come back to me but now I am losing my hopes if not for you I could have died long years ago p'forth." He keeps on sobbing while his mind saying and remembering all the past
Kit after reading some case files he was on ward rounds he see beam crying in one of the corner of corridor chairs he walks fast to him, sitting beside him, beam immediately cooed into his arms
"what happen beam?" he circling beams weeping back but beam only sobbing wetting the kit's white coat, kit keeps on stroking beam back "its okay beam, being an intern is not easy, did sir scold you?" he is worried if beam was tired from the part-time work and could not work on a case file and so he doubt if beam received some scolding from their senior Doctor, kit knew being a medicine student the staff and seniors will never be an easy-going with them, they might even hit them even though they are grown up's, it's not like bullying or something; if they did a mistake they will receive severe punishments and scoldings and so he was concern if beam got hurt with senior words he remember the senior Dr.Forth, mentioning to beam about using influence! Kit feel bad about it, yet it was true and it's not because beam is not talented he is talented but he never gets time to prepare for exams, all he writes without preparation and he gets 50% of marks, but beam is smart and intelligent student, marks and percentage, grades, cannot define a student talent.
After a long sobbing, all the four interns were settled in their classroom and doctor forth making them learn a practical of how to do CPR (cardio pulmonary resuscitation)on a plastic doll after the class he told them take a break.
Ming, yo, kit, beam sitting on the bench outside the large auditorium, where their classes were held in the last second, they were chit-chatting about their first day, yo was fanboying about the tall doctor phana and praising him with compliments drawing ming and kit's attention to his words
"just make a call to your father, he will buy him for you" ming humor receiving a head pat "aie ming.."
Yo and ming chuckled with yo making a declaration "I will surely make him mine"
Beam is being in his own thoughts and massaging his left hand got a swell from weight lifting things in an essential goods store a tear dropped from my eye "....hsshhhhshhhs..it hurts...."
Remaining three turned their attention to beam and yo tooks his head observing his wrist "how many times should we tell you to go for easy jobs"
Beam nibbled on his lower lip, yo keeps massaging beam's left hand while lam came towards him and gives him an icepack " ..take it beam" lam gesture his hand, as beam keeps looking to him in surprised action, as out of no-where lam was handing him an ice pack
he replied " thank you, p'lam" lam gives a cold shoulder and strides out
lam before giving ice pack to beam. Forth called lam " hey lam you go and give this ice pack to beam."
...."why forth did u hurt him?" lam asked
Forth replied sarcastically "yes, now you go and give this to him" lam was shocked to hear forth saying he cannot hurt beam
"as you wish I will go and give this ice pack to him latter don't ask me why I gave this to him." he strides away from forth, not understanding his friend behaviour
after few minutes of lam giving ice pack to beam.....forth came near beam and said "hey you absent mind-follow me"
beam looks to forth with a fit of slight anger forth thought he should stop calling him by that name he don't know why he is feeling guilty by seeing those swollen eyes, why????....
beam followed forth to a open cellar, their were little kids who came to hospital visit to learn first aid classes, beam is standing beside forth with all kids sitting in their small chair looking to the two doctors explaining about first-aid
forth for example he took beam hand as an example how to do a first aid because he wants to treat beam's hand, so bad by which swollen, he hold the swollen wrist gently.
beam being nervous he thought the doctor will break his bone but forth was too gentle in handling him by seeing the gentleness beam was surprised and he hissed in pain his lips are slightly parted as forth sprayed and anti-inflammatory spray(pain relief spray) he hissed slightly due to pain but controlled himself
forth sees a small kid in beam at that particular time of beam hissing in pain, why am I melting even after what he did to me! what he did to you in the past he just used you....being in thoughts he tied beam's swollen wrist with a bandage and left from their, he is observing beam from far: beam is playing with kids, he is so cute playing with kids again at his own thought forth strike away the word cute, and strides away from their
beam and kit were informed to follow to operation theater to assist doctor forth in doing the heart surgery. after the surgery forth told them to follow for theory class.
He is giving lecture on heart. but beam is drifting to sleep he seems to be sleepless last night
"...hey beam" Forth shouts which makes beam flinch and stood in his place "keep standing and listen to my class" he warned beam
Beam stood in his place listening to forth striding here and there at the green board with a white calk he keeps explaining, after 1hour he finds beam being in pain he suggest him " sit down"
seeing him standing uncomfortable, forth thought to let him sit down as his legs might be hurting. he should not be sleeping in class in the first place it's not like he wants to punish him as if he wanted. this class is very important he want everyone to be alert and listen carefully, after completion of class, everyone set to eat lunch
beam seated alone in his allotted room, ming and kit went to cafeteria to eat, beam don't want to disturb the couple. he brought his lunch box its just an omelet rice a regular which he cooks by himself, he cannot afford more than this daily routine lunch box. He is getting bored of eating the same food daily.
When he just started eating he got a phone call it's emergency he needs to go he ran fast when he reached their Dr.forth is already checking the patient condition...
Forth while checking the patient condition he informed nurse to call one of the intern and he sees beam runs to them, forth informs him "beam do the CPR, quick" beam like in an instant minute he is doing it very perfectly he looked drained as if he lost all his energy. forth stop him and continue the rest of the CPR. after done with the CPR he talked with the patients family and told beam to follow me ....
"beam did you had your lunch?".
he was surprised to hear that " Dr.forth I just started." He replied walking alongside of forth
"where are you having the lunch?"
"in my intern room." He being getting surprised of forth voice being gentle and care
"bring your lunch box and come with me "
....beam keeps staring to forth in surprise he is looking with a slight jaw drop
"come on beam, be quick we have again scheduled for a surgery."
...he ran fast to get his box..."come to my room beam" he shouts to beam back and again beam shouts back "...yes,,, Dr.forth I will be there in a minute
*****
"excuse me Dr.forth" he ask for permission to get in
"....yes beam come in take a seat"
.lam was glaring to forth not understanding his friend being so obvious even after spouting some nonsense to beam, he invited beam to have lunch with them.
forth look to beam lunch box its very simple. "Beam is that your lunch box that is the only one you eat"
He just stayed silent, forth then offered his lunch box
"...NO no Dr.forth, I will go with mine" he replied hurriedly
"beam this is my treat for you on your first day, just take it," he said,
Beam gave a confused nod with smile and took the box from forth hands awkwardly, he is eating it very fast
"....what beam are you that hungry?"
he answered with a smile
"...take it slow beam you will choke" he hand him the water glass, beam eyes became teary all of a sudden ..
'what is this forth! what happen to you why that gentle toward beam' Is what lam is thinking in confusion.
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