~~~~
The days got better after my...fourth suicide attempt in the bathroom previously. Other than being abused and...raped by Terrance of course, I was starting to find myself during my...hardships. I was getting stronger inside and I was determine to make it through. I guess they weren't kidding when they said what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. And so I rise.
I started my sophomore year in high school with good grades and turned 17 in that following January. When I turned 17, I felt like...a whole new person. I was a new person and a cold one too. The thug life with Molly became the norm after months of being out in the dangerous streets with her. We grew together. Even she wasn't that scrawny 14 year old who crumbled at gun point once.
I popped a few more people after those two boys who threatened us that day and I honestly don't regret any of it. I was already covered in sin, apparently my life couldn't have never been cleansed of it. I guess I was cursed due to my mother and her wrongdoings at birth.
By the time it was February, I had a new attitude and a new set of friends too. Including Molly, I made two new good friends by the name of Ava and Jazzy.
We were all affiliated with Molly's growing Barbie Doll Gang and had a hell of a time being bad-ass as females. Maybe this was my medicine all along.
(February 21st; 4:12 PM)
~
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LiXx___: i c u ma❤️😊
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Clicking on my messages icon on screen, I chose to respond to the girl who asked to roll with us. Molly always said to take in new recruits, but I wasn't that much of a leader. So, I redirected her to Molly's dms instead and continued with checking my other conversations.
Smiling at my phone, I quickly had to place it right back in my hoodie once Terrance came out of the public bathrooms. He took me to the mall today since I guess he just wanted to be nice and smooth things over with the materialistic shit. I was grateful but in my head, I still feared him ever turning on me.
I didn't make him mad as much anymore because I knew my place now and the boundaries within it. If living under him each day means that he'll keep me alive longer, I guess I have to compromise with that. It was bitter sweet but then again...it's a life or death situation. And death wasn't calling my name just yet...
"You ready to go? Did you get everything you want?" He asked, fixing his pants as he met me up against the wall.
I nodded my head and looked down at the bags labeled in name brands. "Here's your card back" I handed him the piece of plastic.
He took it and pulled out his wallet to put it back where it belongs. "So what did you get from each store?"
"Just some clothes from Forever 21 and urban outfitters. Make-up from Mac and this other boutique. Phone cases. Perfume and lotion from Bath & Body. Jewelry from all over and some new pink furry slides" I explained, shrugging my shoulders.
"What's in the Victoria secret bag" he smiled, getting excited.
I rolled my eyes on the inside, knowing damn well I didn't wanna tell him about the personal things I brought today. "Underwear and a few bras..."
"Mmm. You tryna get sexy for your old man huh? Remind me to show you my appreciation" he said, rubbing my face and causing others to stare as they walked by.
Even the strangers around us knew that he was way too old to be a lover of mine but sadly he was just that and I had no say so in the decision. I felt disgusting all over again due to his flirts. Here I was, a 17 year old girl being forced into a sexual relationship with a grown man pushing 50 years of age. Just thinking about it made me look down in shame at my feet.
"Stop acting like that, like I don't make you happy. You tryna embarrass me in public!?" He gripped my arm angrily.
"No–no I just have a headache, Terrance" I lied.
"Oh, well let's go home then"
(Hours later, 2:57 PM)
📍Molly's House, Meadow Brook
Walking towards Molly's house in Meadow Brook, I immediately notice a group of people scattered all over her property. She called me over for a little meeting and it just so happens that Tyrell and his crew were meeting up here too.
I haven't seen Tyrell face to face in a long time, maybe last year I would say. He and I were over but I knew I still had his heart just by the way he acts towards me now. He's remorseful as fuck about sleeping with Asia but I just can't be with someone as shady as he is. I thought he was down for me, my other half but I guess I haven't ran into a real man yet in my 17 years of living.
Speaking of the shady motherfucker, he was here as promised and did have a firearm present as he sat across the street.
It's sad to think we're never going to be as close as we were before. I still had love for him but sleeping with my best friend, is beyond disrespectful. I would never cheat on him and especially not with one of his homies on top of it. But now, times has changed and why should I hold back from entertaining one of his boys. I could see them both checking me out at the same time.
Ignoring the infamous stare of Tyrell, I walked up the steps to Molly's House and knocked on the door.
"Hey, you looking for Molly?" Chaz asked, standing up from her patio chairs outside.
"Yeah"
"She went to the store real quick but she should be on her way back now"
"Oh okay, thanks for looking out" I smiled.
He blushed when I smiled at him. You can tell he was drooling on the inside from finally engaging in conversation with me. I never wanted to disrespect Tyrell by talking to one of his boys but...I'm single now and those rules no longer apply. "I noticed that you're always showing love on my pictures, what's up with that?" I asked, leaning over the railing.
He continued blushing and started scratching the back of his hair from nerves I assume. "Nah, just supporting. I always thought you were cute as fuck but you never gave me the time or the day."
"Well I was Tyrell's girl for a while, I couldn't do anything trashy like that. I'm not that kind of girl"
"Yeah, and I respect that. Loyalty is hard to come by in a city like this and you had if for the longest for that nigga. Personally, I'm sorry that he...treated you like that. I remember you were so hurt last year but who was I to say something about it"
"I mean you could've comfort me" I flirted. "I would've been up for the conversation"
He gave me a side smirk and moved in closer. I looked away for a second just to notice that Tyrell was still looking our way, even with the attention of his new girlfriend on his arm. Chaz saw that I was looking his way but turned my attention back over to him when he picked up my chin.
When we looked at each other once more, he leaned over to whisper into my ear, grabbing me up from behind even in front of his mans. "I've been wanting to tell you that I've always noticed you ever since middle school. I always thought you were beautiful and that Tyrell didn't really deserve to have you on his arm. I know he hurt you and it's probably hard to still look at him now but I wanna show you what having a real man feels like. I'll do whatever you want me to, even if we just keep it at one night. I just wanna make you feel good like you deserve"
I was speechless to his confession, only the red blush markings on my face could speak for me. I didn't laugh at him anymore like I used to, he was serious about wanting to show me a good time. A good time that I desperately needed and to get my mind off of the negativity once and for all.
"My offer is out there if you want it but I finna go and get back to the trap. Hit me up on the gram though" he said, releasing me from his hold on my ass.
I nodded my head and waved to him on his way out. Tyrell's eyes followed him coldly as he walked down the street from the rest of his crew. Finally, Molly came up though and with a big black bag full of snacks I'm sure, only to laugh at me standing with my arms folded.
"Oh I forgot you were coming, I did call you over here, didn't I?" she chuckled, escorting me to her door as she unlocked it.
"Yeah like– I could've been shot and kidnapped by your brother over there giving me the ice grill still"
She waved my ridiculous statement off. "Bish, Tyrell ain't gonna hurt you. Trust me, all he wants to do is make it up to you. He got on my nerves yesterday when he was talking about you, saying that ain't nobody got kitty like Ro and shit. Like I care and want to picture you and him in bed. Ew"
I blushed from embarrassment and decided to take a seat on the couch while she went into her kitchen. When she came back out again, she tossed me a bag of hot cheetos and sat on the other side of the sectional. "So...Asia wants to make a comeback. You know she's due any day now but after the baby is here, she wants to roll with us too–"
I rolled my eyes and sighed, showing my clear frustration at the name still. I couldn't wait until that bitch pop. I was ready to whoop her ass good for sleeping with my man and having his seed. "Great. That way when I see here I can just fuck her ass up and move on"
"No, Rowan. If she banging with us I'm a need this petty shit squashed because when it comes down to it, yall going to need to have each other's back"
"Yeah, fuck that Molly. That bitch is dead to me so if you think I'm a take a bullet for her then you must've got fucked on your way here" I said crossing my legs, crunching.
She laughed at me and shook her head. "I'm serious, Ro. I'm not expecting you to forgive her right away but just think about it. Shit, I'm mad at her too for throwing you under the bus but you're both my friends and I'm not in the middle of this shit. That's yall business but when it comes to my group of girls, I want us to be a strong ass unit. Feel me?"
"We'll see.." I said in a cocky tone.
"Anyways, I talked to that girl Bubbles and she's in. We just gotta get her and this other girl up to speed with us one day this week. Did I tell you about the mob yet?"
"What mob?" I raised my eyebrows.
"So I didn't then. You know over the years new gangs have formed in Oakland right? The chinks? The Locos? The Reds, the BHM?"
"Never heard of any of those. Where they be at?"
She rolled her eyes and sat back in her chair. "Baby girl you gotta know these things. I know we just starting out but you're my right hand at this point and you're telling me that the only gang you know about in Oakland is DB and BDG?"
I shrugged my shoulders.
"Okay, let me tell you then. The chinks are a Chinese group and they started up around 3 years ago and are known for having territory in Central. The Locos are the Mexican mob and you can find them near the border of San Leandro. They were around for five years now I think but don't let just anyone join them, that's why they're not as big as they should be. Next is the Reds, the Reds control most of West Oakland and I'm surprised you don't know about them. You're from over there and they were around for a while too. The mob I'm talking about now is called the Brotherhood or the BHM. They're all over the east side and control most of Fruitvale and a little bit of Antonio"
"So what's the big news? They're threatening us?"
"No. I just met their leader a couple days ago. His name is Mike and...we've been talking a lot. He's teaching me about the area and how to keep my crew in order"
"And he's okay with sharing Antonio with us?"
"Yeah and that's why I'm trying to get cool with him as much as possible. We gotta have our connections out here in case we need them. That's why we're going to go handle some business for them to show them we mean business. I'll tell you about it when I have the rest of details"
To be continued...
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Hey, thank you for reading this part of Sinful Roads💕 Hope you all enjoyed and continue to keep up with this series☺️
Q: Thoughts 🤔 Chaz😊💕 The start of the partnership between BHM and BDG 🙃😏
I have some more tricks up my sleeve
😏😏😏😏 Tricks that are only going to come to light in this book that we didn't see in Royalty 😅 You'd be surprised.
Fun Fact: Molly is actually from Detroit 🚨🌃