And if that wasn't a reminder that I had been backstabbed by someone I thought I could trust, I shut my eyes tighter and let out another sob, "H-He wouldn't do that! I-I know he wouldn't! You're lying to me!"
"I'm sorry, Louis," Harry whispered apologetically into my hair, "I saw it with my own two eyes."
"You're lying..." I mumbled into his shirt and Harry only held me tighter until I had no more tears left to cry.
---
When Harry and I got back home after our argument in the meeting room, I couldn't even dare to look at him, mostly out of embarrassment. It's been a crazy couple of days and even though I was glad everything was settled between us, I found myself feeling weird and honestly somewhat uncomfortable with myself. I was kind of hating being under my skin right now, repulsed about how I was even able to share drinks and party with Connor, much less dancing so...promiscuously with him. It was an unsettling feeling and one I couldn't seem to shake off my shoulders right now.
Harry and I ended up forgiving each other, after I (finally) stopped drenching his stupidly expensive shirt with my tears but no matter what either of us would say, my stomach would still churn at the thought of what could've happened had that girl not bumped into me, or if Harry hadn't even showed up at that club.
He made us dinner but I barely ate. Despite only having eaten an average breakfast - that I made myself and somehow didn't end up with a burnt out kitchen - and a bland salad Harry forced me to eat for lunch, my stomach felt too full and eating was the last thing on my mind right now. My food ended up being mushed about and dangled at the end of my fork as I felt Harry's gaze on me throughout the whole meal. I know he was just concerned, I mean, it's not everyday that you tell the person you're dating that they were pretty much about to get date-raped, is it?
"Louis?" Harry spoke out, pulling me out of my thoughts, "How're you feeling?"
"I don't know," I confessed with a sigh, "A lot of thing, I guess...Hurt, mostly. And confused..."
"I'm sorry, baby," He cooed. His hand rested on top of mine and squeezed it comfortingly, "I don't understand why anyone would do something like that, but I don't want you to think that it's your fault."
"I know," A mumble left between my lips, "It's just weird to think about, y'know? I've never even thought about him as more than a friend and for him to..."
I couldn't even finish the sentence because of the tightness I was feeling inside my throat and I looked down to my plate. Harry immediately reached over to hug me and I gladly accepted the embrace. His hands softly rubbed my back as I let out a content sigh and snuggled up into the warmth.
"Do you want to go watch a movie?" Harry asked. I pulled away from his arms and shook my head. After the day I had, I could really go for a shower. My face felt sticky over the dried tears and overall, I felt like I was dirty. I needed to relax for a while and scrub away some of the dirt latched onto me.
"I want to go take a shower," I said.
"Need any company?" He asked, eyeing me with a cautious, yet hopeful look. I knew he wanted to join me and I would never say no to that, but I just wanted to be alone, just for ten minutes.
"No, that's okay," I replied and took note of the slightly dejected look on Harry's face, "I won't take long."
"Okay," He somberly said, "I'll start setting up something then."
Despite wanting to be alone, I didn't mean to reject Harry or make him feel like I didn't want to be around him specifically. I just needed a second to breathe and think things through and what better place to do that than in a shower?
I leaned over and kissed my boyfriend on the lips. He seemed taken aback, but the smile he gave me when I pulled back was enough to assure me that he was okay, and I showed him that we were okay with this little peck. He laced our hands together and squeezed them once before gradually letting it go. I savoured the feeling I got in my stomach from being held and how delicate Harry was with me as I walked to my own bathroom, one that I haven't used in some time, to drown my thoughts and relax.
After numbly feeling water cascade down from the shower head to my body for an untracked amount of time, my fingers started to prune and my skin was subtly turning red the longer I stayed under the warm stream, meaning I'd been here long enough.
I felt better, to say the least. My head wasn't as muddled up and I didn't feel gross anymore and that was one of the wonders of taking a shower when things become a little too much. I wrapped a towel around my body to dry myself and walked out to grab some fresh clothes from Harry's bedroom.
I caught a glimpse of him on the couch, sitting comfortably against the cushions with his legs stretched out. He had his phone out and was busy typing something - probably work related - but his gaze shifted to me and his eyes widened slightly. I blushed and headed to our shared room, where I made a b-line to the walk in closet and put on some comfy sweatpants and a white t-shirt that belonged to Harry. It definitely smelt like him and that comforted me.
When I walked into the living room, Harry was still sitting on the same spot he was but his phone was on the coffee table and he had a smirk on his face. I sat down next to him before bringing my legs up and tucking them so that I could cuddle Harry more comfortably.
"What're you smirking at?" I asked him, noticing that he still had on that silly smile as I stretched out my arm over his torso.
"How cute you look with a towel wrapped around your body," He chuckled, "Y'know, you didn't have to go change."
"Of course I didn't," I rolled my eyes with a smile on my face, "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"
I looked up to see the culprit, only to have his green eyes stare back at me. I couldn't hold the smile or the rush flowing through my veins when he'd stare at me like that, so...lovingly. He lowered his head and kissed me, like I'd kissed him before my shower, only this one was longer. Our lips were touching and lazily sucking against each other and it was nice, perfect even.
We tore away from each other and he rested his forehead on mine. It was a sweet moment shared between us and I could never imagine myself getting sick of these little things.
-------
A couple days passed by and Harry and I were slowly getting back on track. There was still some tension felt between us, mostly because I was feeling lost and unsure about whether who I could trust or not, but it was reassuring that he was doing everything he could to make me feel comfortable and actually in a better mood than lately.
Finding out that I got away with getting drugged by someone who I considered as a friend wasn't sitting right with me and I honestly didn't know where me and Connor stood. When he texted me the next day, like nothing even happened, he was just asking me why Harry even punched him and, at the time, I was just as clueless as him. I honestly thought it was something stemmed from jealousy, but I soon realized that wasn't the case at all.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized Connor was just playing dumb to me and that didn't really help on the whole 'who can I trust' thing. He had the nerve to text me like he normally would and I couldn't even fathom to think how on earth was he able to do that without feeling guilty, or even disgusted in himself. I shuddered at the thought of that and I could only be grateful that he didn't even get close to hurting me one way or another.
So with that being stuck on the back of my mind, I've purposefully missed two of my classes because I wasn't sure how to even deal with what happened. Andy texted me both times, asking me why I skipped and I'd always give the same excuse that I wasn't feeling too well, which was honestly a half-lie. I still felt uneasy about being around Connor and even at work I'd be stressing about how I'd act when I would inevitably see him for at least two hours a day. Harry noticed this and he assured me that I could take a couple days off to get into the right mindset, but being stuck at home, alone and with no concrete hobby to take my mind off things, I decided it was better to at least make myself useful and distract myself with work. For the most part, it worked, but that...person would still be at the back of mind no matter what I did.
"Watch out for Connor, okay?" Harry warned me as he stopped his car right in front of the building where my drama classes were held. I didn't really want to come in today either, but after talking about it with Harry while we had lunch together, I decided I didn't want to sacrifice my education just because of one twat in my class and cleary, Harry was still on the fence about it."
"I know," I sighed, "I just hope he skips out today, that would amazing."
"Are you sure you don't want to talk to your teacher about this?" He asked as I started to take off my seat belt, "I can go myself if you prefer, you know I'd get him kicked out in a minute."
"It's pointless," I remarked, "I didn't even get drugged at all, there's really nothing my teacher, or even the police, could do."
At this, Harry let out a frustrated sigh, "Alright, fine. I'm not saying anything, but I'm not letting that fucking dick off the hook that easily and I don't want you being his buddy, understood?"
"Okay, dad," I teased, which earned me a pointed look from the man on the driver's seat.
"I'm just trying to look out for you, babe," Harry pointed out in a serious tone, "I don't want that to happen to you again, ever."
I knew that Harry was being protective of me and that all he wanted was for me to be safe, but it wasn't like I hadn't realized that I couldn't trust Connor anymore. I knew that already and because of what had happened, just the thought of going out to a club made me slightly uncomfortable. I mean, I'm sure going out with friends who have your back is great, but I don't feel like I'd do that anytime soon.
Harry look tired, frustrated even. His feverish eyes looking down on me made me shift in my seat and curse Connor for even approaching me at all. I could tell that Harry's worrying about me was adding onto his daily stress and I wish it didn't, but things happen and it is what it is.
"I don't want that either," I mumbled.
My boyfriend's right hand reached over and intertwined with my left one, before squeezing it gently. I downcasted my eyes and smiled at the sight of one very large hand basically covering my smaller hand. Without me noticing, Harry leaned over the console and kissed the side of my head. I picked my head up in time to catch him for a much needed peck on the lips and as soon as our lips touched, my stomach warmed up and my heart skipped a beat.
"I should probably get to class," I noted when we pulled away from each other. Our hands were still tied together and I didn't like how cold mine felt when Harry untangled our fingers.
"Let me know if you need a ride back home, okay?" He asked. I nodded and couldn't resist to kiss him again, only this peck was no doubt longer than the one from before.
Unwillingly, I broke the kiss and muttered out a 'see you later' before I stepped out of the car and into the cold breeze. I hurriedly walked over to the entrance and it was only when I started to push the heavy door open that I heard Harry start his car and drive off, meaning that I couldn't turn back and run to him if I saw that prick sitting about as if he wasn't about to ruin someone's life.
And unfortunately for me, he was the first person I saw curiously eyeing whoever walked into class ten minutes late and with a stupid excuse about being stuck in traffic. His brown eyes bore into my skull and I tried really hard to pretend I didn't feel his gaze on me, but it was really difficult and if Andy wasn't there, motioning for me to sit on the empty seat beside him, I wouldn't know how I'd be able to hold up.
"Alright class," My teachers voice boomed over the low murmurs caused by my interruption, "So today we're learning about the basics of becoming a character..."
----
Usually, these classes lasted for about two hours, which I honestly didn't mind at all. They were always as fun as they could be and time seemed to fly by really fast. Today, for some reason, we were in here for longer because of all the different activities our teacher wanted to try with us. Of course, not everyone could stay the extra hour longer, some had other responsibilities to fulfill and would have to miss out.
To stay here or to go back home was the same for me, I didn't have anything to do at home other than the dishes but that wasn't even half as exciting, so needless to say, I stayed back and so did Andrew.
The majority of today's lesson was spent by learning in theory (which I'm glad I didn't forget my notebook because there was a lot of stuff I wanted to write down) and by the last hour, we were basically doing some improv, but with very specific guidelines. I was actually looking forward to that, but I was paired up with Connor more times than not and it was a challenge to play my role without letting my feelings towards him take over and even be noticeable.
I think I managed just fine, but I did overhear him pestering Andy and glancing at me while doing so, which lead me to think that he might have realized that I found out about what he was planning on doing to me. Andy didn't like him much, so he just shrugged him aside without a concrete answer, which at the moment was a relief for me, but after the third time Connor came over to talk to me, I realized that Andy should've just told him I was fine with him and that was that.
When class was deemed over, I was worried that Connor would yet again try to pull up a conversation, but to my surprise, he was the first one out the door. Seeing him leave, out of the corner of my eye, was enough to get this weight off my shoulders and relax. I wasn't in danger anymore and I could finally breathe.
Andrew was giving me a ride today, he offered and I gladly accepted it, but the downside was that he parked his car a couple of blocks away and I was pretty much beat after today's lesson.
"So, how's Harry?" My taller friend asked me as we headed over to his car. Andrew was vaguely aware that Harry and I were fighting a couple of days ago and I never went too in detail. I was thankful that Andy wasn't prying me for information and respected my space, but I wasn't in the mood to talk about how I almost got drugged the other night.
"Uh, he's good," I shrugged, kicking a pebble on the way, "We're better now, we both apologized to each other and it's all good, but there's still some tension I'd say..."
"And that's completely normal," He assured, "You have no idea how many times that happened with me and my ex, it lasted for a couple of days until either one of us figured there was no use holding onto what we argued about and the situation kinda fixed itself."
"I guess so..." I pondered, "Why did you guys break up anyways?"
"She got a job offer in Norway and it was that of once-in-a-lifetime opportunities kind of moment, so we decided to go our separate ways," He explained, "Long distance hardly ever works out and we'd been arguing a lot lately so it was the obvious thing to do, really."
"Did you love her?" I found myself asking.
"I did at the time," Andy mused with a small smile on his face, "And I still love her, but I can't see her as more than a friend now. We started out as just friends anyways and looking back, I realized we kind of forced our relationship sometimes. It just didn't feel right, y'know?"
"I see," I hummed, "So, are you currently single and ready to mingle?"
Andy turned his head to eye me suspiciously, "What do you have under your sleeve, Tommo?"
"No-othing," I sang, "M'just curious."
"Right," He muttered, "Uh, yeah. I guess I am, if that's what you want to know."
"It is," I squealed and quickly disguised it with a fake cough so Andy wouldn't get too suspicious, "But anyways, things are still kinda weird with me and Harry and I was thinking about maybe buying him something, but I don't know what to even get that he doesn't have already."
"You could always give him a blowjob," Andy casually said, "I don't think there's any guy out there who would refuse one from their boyfriend, plus it's not a material thing so he couldn't buy one. Which...I guess he could if he wanted to, I guess, but he's dating you so it makes it even more special!"
"Oh God, Andrew," I groaned, cheeks stained a burning red, "I'm not gonna give him a blowjob."
"Why not?" He muttered in appal, "It's like, the perfect gift, I'm pretty sure he'd love it! I mean, he'd be stupid not to and-"
"Okay!" I shouted, interrupting his train of thought, "Clearly you're not the best person to ask this."
Andy gasped and placed a hand over his heart, "I'm offended, I just gave you a million dollar idea that doesn't cost a thing and would mutually benefit you guys and this is how you treat me?"
I sighed, "You know what? Fine, I'll give him a blowjob if that'll make you happy."
"Not just me," He pointed out, "I bet Harry will be over the moon."
"You flatter me too much," I rolled my eyes with a teasing smile, "I might buy him some chocolates, or maybe some kale since he's all about that healthy lifestyle."
"You do you, but you already know what I have to say about that," Andy teased, which resulted in me gently pushing him with my shoulder, but being that Andy is like, triple my size, he barely even moved an inch and I wondered why I was surrounded by buff men all the time who wouldn't even budge, curly haired ones included.
"You're gonna be the death of me..." I groaned and Andy laughed.
--------
As I walked into the flat with a chocolate bar on one hand and my keys on the other, my nose crinkled at the immediate smell of smoke wafting in the air and my eyes immediately darted to the kitchen. Harry wasn't there and the rest of the living room seemed pretty intact, so I figured he was locked up in his office working and, apparently so, smoking.
After catching him doing that in the balcony, I haven't seen him with a cigarette ever since. I noticed he kept a pack in our room, on his bedside table, probably because I found out about this nasty habit of his and he had no reason to hide it from me anymore. Even so, he knew I didn't like it when he smoked and even though he was a fully grown adult (seven years older than me, I might add) that was capable of making his own decisions, I would rather smoking not be a part of those decisions.
Just like I thought, the door to his office was closed but not entirely shut, meaning that he was most likely inside. It also helped than the bitter smell grew stronger the closer I walked to it and I made a mental note to spray some of those vanilla scented air fresheners Harry had.
Pushing the door open, I saw my boyfriend with a cigarette halfway burned between his lips and an ashtray beside him with a couple of burnt out butts crushed and used. His tie was messily placed on the edge of his black office table, not to mention the blazer on his chair and his shirt with the top buttons left undone. His hair, that was growing longer, looked unruly and messy, as if Harry brushed a hand through his curls one time too many and this whole look was paired up with tired eyes, who empitly stared at the screen of his computer as he typed away.
"Harry?" I called out for him. He didn't even notice that I had pushed the door open and instantly looked relieved when he saw me. Harry took the cigarette off his lips and crushed it on the ashtray as he blew out some grey smoke into the air.
"Hey, baby," He spoke sweetly, motioning for me to go over to his side and sit on his lap, which I rightfully did, "How was class? Was the extra hour worth it?"
I was no stranger to Harry and I knew that if I hadn't texted him about how my class was gonna be longer today, his mind would go down the gutter and I would've been bombarded with worried texts and unanswered phone calls, all because of how protective Harry was over me. It was a trait I liked he had, but I knew it was one that stood on very thin ice.
"It was alright," I shrugged, "We just sticked to theory mostly, but it was nice to learn about these new things and then practice them a little."
"I'm glad you had fun," He smiled before pecking my cheek, "Was...Connor there?"
I sighed, "Yeah, he was."
I felt Harry tense under me and the warm smile on his face quickly turned into a much more rigid and worried expression.
"Did he talk to you?" He asked, "Did he say anything about what he-"
"Harry," I stopped him before he could continue, "We hardly even talked, much less about what happened that night, I promise. I don't even want to talk to him anymore, I just want to get my degree and never see him again."
"Okay, that's good," He let out a breath of relief and squeezed my side.
I tucked a loose curl behind his ear, "Is that why you were smoking?"
"Is it that obvious?" He dryly chuckled. I bit my bottom lip and decided to wrap my arms around his shoulders.
"I'm happy that you worry about me," I started, "But I don't want you to stress out over me, especially if that makes you want to smoke. You know I don't like that."
Harry smiled, "I'll try to tone it down, babe. It's just hard because I don't want anything bad to happen..."
"I don't want that either," I said, "But smoking won't make things any easier, did you not learn about all the bad things that can happen if you smoke?"
"Alright, fine. I get it," He raised his hands in defeat, "I'll try not to smoke as often, for you princess."
I smiled triumphantly, "Great, I'm happy to hear that. I actually bought you something-"
"You don't have to buy me anything, Louis," Harry interrupted me.
"I know I don't, but what kind of boyfriend doesn't buy gifts for their daddy?" I poked my tongue out. Harry's pupils dilated a bit and his grip on me tightened, "Plus, it's not anything too expensive, I just went out to pick up some chocolate, dark chocolate since I know that's your favorite."
"Aw," He cooed as I handed over his gift, "Thank you so much, baby. Eat it with me?"
"No, thanks," I politely declined and hopped off his lap, "I don't really like dark chocolate, plus it's your gift anyways."
"Okay," He nodded, "I'll eat some for dessert then."
"Cool beans," I said, which earnt a chuckle from my boyfriend, "I'm gonna take a shower, are we orderning anything for dinner?"
"No, I'll be out in a minute to make us something," Harry replied. I nodded and pecked his cheek before leaving him to finish his work and to go get a nice warm shower.
---
A/N: woo hope you guys liked this chapter with a very brief Andy backstory!! How do you guys feel about #bandy? also just a psa to look out for your drinks when you go out and pls be on the lookout for your friends too. that shit actually happened to a friend of a friend and she got lucky that she got called an ambulance before the weirdo even touched her.
Ugh I cant believe it took me almost two weeks to update, but its only cause im on vacation rn but thankfully I managed to write some things up yesterday!!! I'll be back to regular updates in no time :)