Aubrey POV ✨
If you're contemplating suicide, this is for you
See this is for the moments when ya alone and with emotion
So fucking bold leaves you mentally frozen
When ya cold and alone heart open and broken
When that loves outta sight and your hearts into focus
When ya floating in oceans hopeless soaking in misery
Headphones on you link yourself with the synergy
When you watch your mind and ya lost in a song, be strong
You are not alone, I just want you to know you are not alone.
There's angels in the airwaves tonight
And I've been running all of my life
And I need you to stay, I need you to stay
Angels in the airwaves tonight
I sat at the bottom of my bed listening to Angel Haze and my mind went through circles. My mind is telling me one thing while my heart is saying another.
I was told to always speak to God and he'll listen no matter what the problem may be always speak to God. He might not be there when you want him to but he's always on time.
My heart was aching. I was tired of being misused and abused by my so called friends and family. No one seemed to love me.
I would see my mother rather spend most of her time with her son and that son of bitch boyfriend of hers. It's not like she cared about me. She barely even looks at me. I always thought maybe it's because we have two different dads.
My mother couldn't stand my father, never understood why. My mom and dad were what you call a " one night stand " don't think that my dad is a saint. He ain't off the hook.
My dad didn't claim me as a child when I was born. He told everybody that I wasn't his but from how everyone else sees it I was in fact his twin.
Same nose, same lips, same eyes, hell same everything. I was my fathers child. Til this day we live in the SAME city and I barely see him.
At school as I hear about is how my dads the biggest drug lord in Louisiana and how he treats woman.
Why do they feel the need to tell me? I don't give a rats ass. He would rather do all of that than spend time with his kids.
I guess this is what you call life right?
It was slowly becoming time for me to get ready for school. Lord I dreaded going into that hell hole.
The place was filled with nasty ass females who hated to see another female shine. Like we as females go through the most shit daily and you hating on one another?
The guys were much worse. They treated females as if they were dogs. These females here will literally crawl on all fours in front of the whole school just to impress a guy. Like girl if he's making you do all of this then you shouldn't be or even want to be with him. Have some respect.
My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of my evil mother's voice.
"Aubrey! Get up it's time for school" My mom yelled from downstairs.
" Yeah "
Yawning to myself as I made my way into my bathroom. Turning on the shower I went back into my room and looked for some clothes.
I pulled out my favorite pink shirt and some comfy sweatpants. Did I need to dress good for these clowns? Hell naw. I Bluetooth my phone to my speaker and got in the shower.
If you searchin' for the one, I'm the real thing
Tell me what you really know about sacrifice
Kush got me in the air like a trampoline
Lord watch over me, I ain't livin' right
Used to dream 'bout these days that I'm livin' now
I swear it all made sense like a week ago
Every day I gotta deal with some bullshit
I swear it's harder than it looks, like a finger roll
I appreciate all of my brothers
Gotta know I made room at the dinner table
They was here when the boy had nothin'
It's only right that we ball 'til we're unstable
Wild nights on the north, free the boy Gabriel
Went from Girbaud jeans to the Black Label
Now it's 6 figure deals at the round table
I sang to myself as I was in the shower. I love me some K.Camp that man there gives me the chills. His voice is so smooth and the way he makes his music. Ooohhh Jesus.
After a good 30 minute shower I got out and dried myself off. I applied my Jergens lotion on my body and sprayed some rain blossom on my body.
Boy did I love me some bath and body works.
I made my way downstairs to get me something to eat before I walked to school.
"You always eating something damn. Can you go without eating for 3 days " James, my moms boyfriend yelled.
"Can you go 3 days without smoking crack and actually finding a real job?"
Silence. That's what I thought. I grabbed an apple and made my way to the door.
The should be a good day.
Here I am in 35 minutes into 1st period and I'm already ready to go. This is my least favorite subject. I hate algebra.
I was passing so I mean I really didn't care. Ain't like we using this is the real world.
"Alright class that'll be all for this period, don't forget to do your chapter 3 homework and have it turned in by Monday before class. If not you'll receive a 25 point deductible. I'd take this serious guys. Aubrey? Come see me after class."
I patiently waited until everyone had gone out the room before I made my way to the front.
I hate walking in a crowed space trying to get to my destination. Too much work if you ask me.
" Yes Mr. Jones?" I asked rolling my eyes.
" Hey Ms.Kemp, I received an email from principle Jackson and I was told to ask you if you're interesting in tutoring"
" Tutoring..Tutoring who?"
"Some seniors seem to be having trouble in history, and everyone history teacher has recommend you. I know this may be overwhelming considering the fact that you're only a sophomore. If you don't want to then I'll ema.."
" No need to. I'm all in " I smiled. Who wouldn't want to be seen with the seniors. For god sake they're seniors.
Seniors are the most popular in school. They could do whatever they want. Some even cuss out the teachers and never get in trouble. Do you know how many teachers I would love to curse out?
"Alright Ms. Kemp, make your way into the front office I'll shoot principle Jackson an email and I'll also shoot your next period teacher an email."
After thanking Mr.Jones I pranced myself into the front office. Taking a seat and waiting on someone I spotted this guy.
He was tall maybe 6'3 his skin complexion was a smooth chocolate, he had a beard that was nicely trimmed. He was like the perfect man.
"Hi. I'm Aubrey" I spoke interrupting the silence.
"Little girl If yo chubby ass don't leave me alone I'll strangle you to death " He spat back.
Damn this is what I get for trying to be open and friendly? Shit I'll never speak to that roach again.
I peddled on my I-phone 6 Plus until Principle Jackson came.
"Sorry I'm late. Had to go solve this problem in the girls restroom, follow me Aubrey and Chris"
Chris...Who in the hell was chris. When I tell you I was livid when that roach got up. He looked at me and rolled his eyes.
If looks could kill that bitch would be dead.
"I'm sure you both know why you're here. Chris meet Aubrey, Aubrey meet Chris. You two will be seeing each other for awhile."
"No disrespect Ms. J, But I don't need lil chubby helping me with anything shit I'm good with the other ho- I mean tutor y'all gave me. I mean she been teaching me a lot. Chris said smirking to himself.
"Do you seriously want to fail your senior year? I didn't think so. So I need you to get your ass in gear and learn something. I won't have yo ass in my school for a second year you're already too much as it is. We don't need you again. You should want to be something, stop acting like your damn father " Principle Jackson spat.
The way Chris looked at her. He eyes were turning red, you could see his veins popping out of his neck. I thought he was going to explode but he just grabbed his stuff and left.
"Thanks for the opportunity " I said trying to back up my things.
"Aubrey, if you do this for me I promise to give you a recommendation on your sociology major scholarships. "
"Are you serious? So all I have to do is tutor him for the rest of the year and you'll do it?"
Lord knows I've been dreaming to get a good recommendation. My plan is to major is sociology and later become a family counselor, hell even working in the juvenile systems.
Principle Jackson nodded her head which I'm taking as a yes.
" Deal " I said smiled shaking her hand.
I mean it's only tutoring right, who said we had to be friends.
What does Principle Jackson have on Chris's father?
Why is Aubrey's mom such a bitch?
Will Aubrey follow through for the scholarship?